Hello everyone,
This is my very first OS book,so please support and vote,enjoy reading!💕
ALERT - This book contains highly dark reality,and suicidal thoughts along with attempts of the same,so please read with your choice,and decision.
Akshara sat down with a deep thud on the floor - not being able to breathe in an even tone.Her own breath hitching,and intermittent,her heart could not expect what she saw the very moment.
"Dr.Abhimanyu Birla engaged to Miss.Anamika Purohit today."
This had nothing but just the power to itch her heart and splatter it into parts.Tears involuntarily flowing past her cheeks.
Her own body was not in support,as she leaned over the bed,hot and fresh tears flowing constantly.
"Why?why?why?" - she screamed."Why Abhi,why?"
No,it was not her inner instinct,but the love she had for him since the very beginning,but now-
There were no scopes to them for lifetime together,no way.
Heaven sake,if she would have confessed,maybe this won't have happened.
"Abhi-" - his name so soft-spoken with love laced into it.
Her state of mind losing it's balance,while she starred blankly at the floor.
Regret.
If she would have just confessed a little earlier,maybe it would have been her instead of his current fiancé,they would have bonded for life,they might be together.But there were not.And that hurts.
Her gaze was fixated on the blank floor,which stood still,with no movement.
She reminscienced.
The very moments from months ago.
~
"Abhimanyu,eat it neatly na." - she pleaded.
"And how is your neat and clean?" - his brow raised.
"you see, like this-" - she took a bite tidily, flaunting.
"Okay but there's nothing to flaunt about,dear." - he chuckled.
"There is." - she stood closer.
"And what's that?" - his hands gripping on his own waist.
"That I eat neatly and you don't." - she smirked cutely.
"You-" - and he ran after her, swiftly.
"You are more than a patient of mental asylum." - throwing daggers,she went past.
~
Those were the days when they were so confided in each other,to pay attention to the world.All that was common but noticeable was that they had spent so much of time together in the hostel,simply enjoying themselves.
His company and partnership was no doubt-crease,the best thing to happen in her while ecstasy of life.
And her company?Oh,damn!The best to him, regardless of her chirpy conduct the whole day,it was his damn favourite.
It was so beautiful and alluring then,for life- it would be the cherished moments of all but were things the very same?
No damn,no!
Abd this hurted her even more.
Her eyes trembling with numbness, totally traumatized, constant tears dropping down past her cheekbones,her nose red(that was no doubt his cutest thing to tease about),and her body stiff.
"Abhi-" - she changed his beautiful name as a mantra since how long.
~
They used to smile together,their every creepy moments had happened together,their every tease,every laughter,every fun,every prank,were together,every slight enjoyment were with each other.
Every single merth of ecstacy had been together.
Was it meant to last forever?
Maybe or maybe not.
~
There was a slight knock on the door,with a soft voice "Akshu,go and say it all to your Abhi."
No,it was not a person by reality,it was just the concious of her,that was provoking the feelings of her heart,forcing her to confess it today or maybe she will lose him forever or ever.
But what about his fiancé?Will she not be hurt?He has moved on,right?So,with which right and demeanour will she go to him?Who was she to him?
"He has moved on,Akshu but you haven't.Give it a try!Maybe it's the very same way how he feels for you somewhere." - the voice laced with so concern,that it was soothening her heart a little much.
It was not that she never got this much of love,but this was different.
"I need to confess." - she imposed the command to herself,walking straight away from the house.
~
She was swiftly,dragging herself on the rainy streets of Udaipur,her body drenched.
As a maiden,she had loved rain so much,maybe because she enjoyed it.
But now,it was pretty much favourite to her,as it declined the presence of her tears that flowed constant.
Yes,she has changed since he left.
In no time,she was in front of his house,her mind debating on whether to walk ahead,or back off.
But then the courage with which she walked till here, would be a waste of time then.
Her gaze was getting blurry,she was hallucinating.
All that was visible to her was a figure of a man,with a white shirt on his chest,and brown lowers,busy on his phone.
"Abhi..." - a soft whisper escaped her lips.
And she could feel his movement towards him.
She walked closer.
"Akshara,you here?" - he spoke,lifting her in his arms,as she seemed weak enough.
"Abhi" - she chanted his name times.
"Sit here." - he helped her sit on the stairs.
"Abhi,you are getting married?"
"Umm...how come you get to know that?"
"Social media."
Her own eyes shedding hot tears by now.
"Oh"
"But-"
"But what,Akshara?" - his frown doubling in doubt.
And she stood there,getting again drenched in the rain,tears constantly again flowing by her eyes.
"Akshara, complete that."
"BUT I LOVE YOU NA ABHI" - she screamed,her voice laced with more and more love.
"Akshara?" - he speculated.
"Yes,Abhi,I was not lying when I said that." - she craned her neck to turn to him.
"Damn,you love me?"
"More than what you think!" - her soft voice, doing magic to him.
"Akshara,sit here."
"Let me explain you" - he said.
"This happened to be like,I started liking you in the last year of our college,I had just liked you,more than friend,but I doubted you liking me back,but then I thought you won't trust me,and then when I came back here,my parents got me engaged to Anamika,so..."
"Abhi,why didn't you trust me?" - her eyes moistened.
"Maybe cause I feared breaking our friendship."
"Abhi,I trusted you the most,I thought maybe you'll atleast not hide this such things,I am sorry but I can never trust you." - the depth of her pain more than the oceans could ever match.
Her heart pierced.
More than his actions,it was the trust that she had on him,that broke up.
"Abhi...why?"
"Akshara,I am sorry"
~
Days passed by.No conversation happened.
He tried times to contact her,but she kept herself locked in the room for many days.
All she'd do was sit in the room the whole big day long,and sob,or stare at the sky and nature.
She was following the same cycle,sitting in the room, starring at random things around,on a past-afternoon,by dusk.
And she could hear someone talking in the phone.
"Yes,please inform me about the hospital, we'll be arriving."
"Bade Paa, it's the Birla Hospital,we need to leave."
And she went into deep thinking.
It was the same hospital for which they had worked so hard the whole year.
Together.
Again, memories hurt.
"But I need to see upon who it is." - she thought."Maybe Bhaiya?N-no"
And a crease of worry drew on her forehead.Her orbs getting wet itself.
"I neec to check."
~
She had made her mind to walk to the hospital,maybe she'd find some trace.
She was walking solemnly,when she turned upon to find Abhimanyu,with a knife in his hand.
What happened in the past moments was - to her absence of notice,goons had attacked her,trying to theft her,or
maybe take someone away forever.It
was no doubt a misery.And to her,he
was always the life-saviour,and came up to safeguard her,from the world and evils.He took out a knife,which was purposely with him,for such times.And he tried hurting them a little to protect her,without her knowledge.How could someone be so caring?But he was, for her.Maybe he's
her way of god's blessing and angel.He bravely fought with the goons,with the swift skills of karate,damn!...The world was damned for him when it comes to her.
And she craned her neck back with acknowledge the damage he did for his dearly friend,oh just friend?Maybe not.
And her sight fixated to the knife he had,no wonder what she thought.
Maybe her hallucinating mind or the trust issues issue she had made her do the sequel.
Lose him forever.
Deep inside, even her heart and his,craved for the laughter,the merths,that they spent together,but misfortune!They couldn't now.
And her trust issues gree so much, that it killed the feelings of her,she started disbelieving everything she saw.Quietly,she assumed things her way.She realised lately but maybe that was her fate wanting.She couldn't decline but just behave the way she was treated,with so much of pain and trauma.
And this time,the very same way,she committed a mistake out of her trauma, maybe that was how she assumed.
Fate to be cursed.
She assumed him to be coming to hurt her,cause she hurted him,and her outgrowing fear,had her to -
Cause a paper cut on his wrist with the same knife,he has used once to safeguard her from the evils.
But that was not the paper cut that cause his heart so much of pain,but the lack of trust she had on him.
He had loved her atleast not to life,once in his lifetime.Truly,more than that even,so much that the world would be deprived to know nobody could love her more than anthing.
It tugged his heart more than the whole and sole depth of the ocean,the height of the sky,the adversity of the land, the coverage of the water on the Earth,the heat of the sun,the whole existence of the world,he had loved her,but that simple lack of trust made him lifeless in seconds.
It didn't took it a second to pang his heart so hard,and he became lifeless in a second.
What was the point of his existence?If he couldn't just satisfy or win the trust of his ladylove, wasn't he do capable even?
She had trusted him so much once,but-
What happened seconds before,made him skip all the beats that happened in the last few moments.
He went numb and blank,with no expressions,and no debate.
It was clear that his existence was no more anthing,as far as it seemed.
It seemed so worse to him,that he couldn't even protect and gain the trust of her,why was he even alive? Couldn't he even do that?
And there she stood,starring blankly at him,with numb eyes and emotions.
"Akshu,I was burdened by my family's love,to not confess,but now that I am free from the world,I shall honour to let you know that I love you,I am so so so sorry for hurting you." - the last words that left his mouth were much painful.
"I loved you,I love you,and I will always love you, Akshu.Take care and goodbye,my love."
And with that,he staggered her beside at the sudden realisation,came at the front,and fell down on the floor as a goon shot him directly on his head,maybe fate wanted this to happen, maybe that was the best redemption.
And he left the world in no seconds.
Not just gun shots,made him leave,but the deep guilty of not being able to keep his ladylove happy,had already killed him inside,and this was just the physical dismissal, emotional had happened much ago.
Love and science don't work together,do they?
And he left everyone forever.
And she couldn't help.
"Abhi-" - a scream left out her mouth,as she realised the loss that happened the moment.
"Abhiiiiiiii"
The floor slipped beneath her feet, acknowledging the loss that happened.
She losed him forever and ever?
And she staggered back and forth,with a intense realisation and guilty.
She losed her love forever?.
She did, for this time, really.
As she saw in drowning onto the pool of blood,her heart sank deeper for deeper.
~
"Doctor,please check for some treatment,maybe you can save him." - she pleaded with a little of hope to the doctor.
"We tried our best,Ms.goenka." - the doctor informed.
And the whole family was present outside,but there Akshara stood,with an ocean of emotions running in her eyes,her hands shaking,with heart sinking with immense guilt.
"Sorry,but we couldn't save Dr.Abhimanyu Birla." - the doctor announced,as he stepped out of the OT.
And the reality hit her, and she stood there, just blankly starring at the floor,and tears flowed down past her cheekbones,as her heart skipped many beats as once.
No,this can't be actually for real.
He left her forever?How?Will she never get him back?Can she not apologise and mend things back again?
Damn,no,it was what the reality had decided.
This was how two hearts, that beat for each other, stopped doing so.One forever,and second for the whole life.
"Abhi..." - a whisper escaped her mouth as she fell on the floor with a thud.
~
"Akshara,how did this happen?"
"Akshara,why did you do that?"
"Akshu,tell us something."
"Akshu,please stop concealing the facts."
The family members,one after the another, speculated her,while she stood numb,with her orbs wet,not able to swallow the reality.
Was it too tough?Or was it just her?Maybe losing your love is painful tha ever.
People say - 'A man's heart is not like a mother's womb,which will shed blood fir you and adjust everytime'.
But he had proved that some men are seriously odd one out, with a shimmering heart.
No,he was practically different from the every other men present in the world.His heart had adjusted so much for her, soared just for her,and only loved her.
His heart even bleeded for her,no matter how much love he got back in return.
He was different and the fact could never be considered a lie,not today,not in the future.
"What are we about to response to Anamika's family?" - an elder asked.
"We did not think of this."
And again her heart sank.
And only way to dissolve it was to talk to Anamika herself,so she decided to do so.
~
"Uncle,aunty,I assure you nobody shall accuse her of anthing from our family in the future." - she spoke.
"Beta,I am okay with that.Just that Anamika needs a little safety and we are too concerned if it." - Mr.Purohit replied.
"May I talk to her for a few minutes?" - she asked.
"Why not.Sure,you may." - Mrs.Purohit replied,leading her to the room.
~
"Anamika" - Akshara spoke lightly.
"Akshara,I know you,I hope you'll understand me." - Anamika spoke.
"Yes I do more than you think."
"I never loved him,but I think maybe I started liking him,I could not even dare to go to meet him for the last time,it was not possible for me,he was a genuine person who I am sure if loved,would bring the world to her feet.He was such of a person,so humble and so lovable, honestly I never regretted spending time with him.If I even talk about him as a person and not my fiancé,he was just amazing and crazy.But I could see him deprived most of the times recently and maybe so this happened-" - and they shed tears of sorrow together.
How fate was playing it's evil game!
"I am sorry,but I have to tell you this...I once loved Abhimanyu,and I am ashamed to come to know that you even loved him.For now,he was actually yours,and so I would like to apologise maybe if you do accept it." - she said,out of her own way.
"You don't need to." - Anamika distressed her.
"Please take care of yourself."
"Even you too."
~
Life has turned topsy-turvy,by now,she was just living for granted.
Her whole reason to live was already not here,and so her heart had actually stopped beating the day,the moment,the very same second he left the world.
He had martyred himself for her,maybe.
No love would sacrifice so much,as he did.
"I lost Abhi." - that was all she repeated with ultimate guilt.
And turned back to her thinking process.
And time and again,a night,she thought about her existence which was totally useless for her.
Maybe fate wanted them to be together in the heaven.
She had even her Bade Papa say - "But no matter what we can't deny the loss of Abhimanyu was because of our Akshu itself".
So basically nobody has any trust on her,and also there was no sunshine in her life.
The flow in her eyes had faded into immense guilt,the sunshine in her turned into a perfect storm,the chirpiness in her came to be her tears and - ALSO SOON HER MERTH TO HER MOURN.
And also even his life.
~
"Dear family,I want you all to take care and a good and strong responsibility of Anamika,and please don't try to investigate the reasons behind this.I was meant to be Abhi's,and with a hope of meeting him in the heaven,I backed off from life.Anyhow,I know you all never trusted me but please take care.And remember forever that I love Abhi." - her brother read aloud the suicidal note.
And looked back forth to her lying in the pool of blood,with deep and multiple cuts on her wrist,with a severe urge to back off from life.
She did not want to live more, hopefully God granted her a longer life than this,but this was her solemn wish.
It had been tough for her to maintain herself after the news and his death especially,she had never wished to survive and fight with the evils and guilt that would remain life-long,and hence,she was prolonged to death,oh yes,a simply forced one.
Maybe they could unite in the heaven!
They were meant for each other,the world did not turn out to be the safest and reminscing place for them,so they better chose the heaven for themselves to let their souls reunite there with happiness,pleasure and an alluring journey.
With hopes of high unity of souls that could not love each other on the Earth might gain a proper happiness as two souls into one.
Hopefully and presumably,the merth that they created and enjoyed together,had them to mourn the deaths together even.
THE END.
~
Please support and shower your love,thank you so much for giving and taking out your precious time to read this book,and please do read out my other books as well.💕
I hope y'all liked the plot and the story,though I have never wrote such a dark reality and symbolism,I tried my luck best,do support,vote,share it with your friends and comment your reviews.❤️
It was highly affecting if you got to feel it by the heart,I even sobbed tines while completing this and writing the death part of our leads,was even more tough for me cause i literally can't.
Hoping our Akshu and Abhi may unite in the heaven,and turn to mono-soul with happiness.🤧💗
Till then stay happy and smile!❤️
~ Riddhima.