After the longest second of Ben's life, everybody else swam back up to the surface. Putting a smile back on his face, Tim extended his hand. "Hi, I don't think we've met."
"Not officially," Nino said, shaking hands. "Nino Ventura."
"Ah," Tim said, the recognition dawning on him as the handshake of all handshakes continued going. "You're right. Tim Sullivan."
Ben backed away slowly, slinking over to Lincoln. He grabbed his friend's arm for dear life and whispered, "Why do they keep shaking hands?"
Freddy chuckled. "It's called a pissing contest, Ben."
"It's great we're finally meeting," Nino said with a polite smile Ben didn't recognize.
"I agree." Tim mirrored this plastic smile. "Ben has said so much about you."
"Hm. Yeah, Ben mentioned you a few times."
"Shots!" Ben shouted, snatching one of the small shot glasses Nino brought over. "Nino brought shots! Let's go! Happy Birthday, Ethan!"
"Happy Birthday to me!" Ethan echoed and threw back his shot, creating a domino effect except for Nino, who just watched. Ben pushed a shot towards Ethan and clinked their glasses together before Ben knocked back another, letting the warmth settle into his bones. "We gotta dance," Ethan said, and Ben clapped, ready to go.
He grabbed Ethan, and the rest followed, until Lincoln called out, "Not you." He pointed at Nino like a threat.
"Do you want me to stay?" Freddy asked.
"No," Lincoln said and patted his husband's chest. "Go dance. Nino and I just need to catch up."
"If you insist." Freddy gave him a quick kiss and then threw an arm around Ben's neck, dragging him to the dance floor, filled with bodies dancing to the old disco music pulsing in the air. His heart dancing along to the same beat. Ben didn't know a single song, but he didn't need to know the words. Ben's mind was blank for the first time in a long time. Ben just danced, and he had the biggest smile on his face. It was nice to feel like a person again.
He jumped around person to person, dancing with Ethan, Freddy, Tim, and eventually Lincoln, who pulled Ben from behind by his hips. The heat didn't even matter. All of Ben's tension just melted away, and he just danced loose and free, without a care in the world. Usually, Ben hated the crowds, but tonight he didn't seem to mind it. It made it even more thrilling. Everything about tonight reminded him he was a living, breathing, person. Tim and Lincoln left for more drinks.
Searching his group, Ben couldn't find Nino. Glancing through the bodies and bodies, Ben couldn't see Nino anywhere. He turned back, the lone person standing still as he noticed Nino was still at the table. Nino stood out from others not just because he was alone. He just looked like a God among men. Ben caught his attention.
Ben waved him over, but Nino shook his head and Ben just insisted, waving even harder. All that did was make Nino laugh and shake his head at the drink he hadn't touched. This wouldn't do. Leaning into Lincoln, Ben said, "One second."
Pushing through the crowd, Ben walked right up to the ledge and the only thing between them. He hung off the railing, resting his face against the cool metal. It was such a relief, this coolness and Nino's beautiful face. "Come dance," Ben called out.
Nino shook his head. "I'm alright."
"That wasn't a question, Mr. Ventura," Ben tried using his most commanding voice, despite his smile. "Get out here and dance with me. When's the next time we're gonna have a moment like this...?" Saying it out loud made Ben's chest ache, but he pushed it away and dug his heels into the ground. "Let's go. Show everybody how it's done."
Every second of the night, and it didn't just stop when Ben was on the dance floor, but he felt connected to Nino. One string keeping them tied together. Sighing, Nino's body deflated, and he let go of the drink. He dragged himself to his feet and walked to the railing.
"Move it," Nino warned and Ben stepped back, watching Nino leap over the side and landing like it was nothing. He got a few drunken cheers from the crowd, and Ben rolled his eyes.
"Do you have to be so extra?" He asked a reasonable question, not moving as Nino approached. Just staring at Nino, Ben's face in a resting smile.
"Do you have to breathe?"
A puff of laughter escaped Ben's nose, and he reached down, taking Nino's hand. He pulled Nino along and led him to the dance floor with the others who cheered, and Nino tried playing coy, but Ben knew that genuine smile. Everyone huddled, dancing, jumping, and moving together, but within seconds Ben knew Nino could dance. The way his hips moved with ease. The way he actually knew what to do with his hands. Nino's cool hand slid around the back of Ben's neck, bringing him closer, and Ben's hand landed on his shoulders. Nino stole one and gave him a quick spin and they were dancing again.
Ben met Nino's eyes again, so aware of his body and his hands that everyone else on that dance floor faded away. Somehow, Ben's heartbeat thrummed louder in his ears than the music. A room with technicolor lights and pulsing beats, where only two people existed. This was magic.
***
Ben splashed some cold water on his face and let out a long sigh. It was at that point in the night where his head felt so heavy, he could curl up in a ball and fall asleep. The air was thicker, but the floor was uneven. Funny how being a lightweight made him a thousand times heavier.
"What did you say to Nino?" Ben asked while Lincoln was finishing up in the stall. His voice bounced against the concrete bathroom walls.
A sigh rattled around the stall. Lincoln said, "Nothing."
"Clearly you said something."
"I was just asking about you. I'm gonna go gray early because of you. You call me from a weird number to have Nino pick you up at a hotel and you refuse to explain why."
"I just got lost."
"In your own city?"
Lincoln emerged from the bathroom with one brow raised. He shook his head. "I also don't believe that little girl kicked you in the face. There's something I don't know." Lincoln washed his hands in the next seat, looking at Ben through the mirror. "You're always weird when Nino visits, but there's something different about this time."
"Well..." Ben held onto the sink edges and watched droplets spittle out of the faucet. "This might be the last visit."
Whipping around at Ben, Lincoln's eyes almost popped out of his head. "What?" He put his hand on Ben's shoulder with a firm, reassuring grip. "Oh, my god. Are you ok?"
"I'm..."
The next word was caught in Ben's throat. He wanted to say he was fine, but the word was forbidden. Everyone seemed to think being fine was a bad thing, but it was the best answer. He didn't want to drag Lincoln down by confessing that not seeing Nino again was like detonating a bomb in Ben's life, because if he wasn't allowed to be, he was definitely unhappy. Lincoln couldn't change anything, so it was pointless to make his friends worry.
Ben just said it, "I'm fine."
And Lincoln reacted the exact way Ben expected: absolutely over it. Just those two little words made Lincoln look like he was ready for bed, his entire body deflating into a sad lump.
Defensively, Ben raised his voice. "What? I'm fine! If I say I'm fine, I'm fine."
"Do you know why I hate it when you just say you're fine?"
"Because it would cost me a game of scrabble."
"No, because it doesn't tell me how you feel at all. Fine gives me nothing. I'm asking how you are because I genuinely want to know. So, how are you? And give me a real answer."
Ben looked down and gave Lincoln at least an inch. "I'm dealing with it. I mean, our lives are just going in different directions. It was always bound to happen."
"But... but how do you know it's over?"
"Does it really matter?"
"Of course, it matters." Lincoln brought Ben into a hug, squeezing him tight. Ben hooked his chin over Lincoln's shoulders, nestling inside and savoring being held. "Everything matters if it concerns you. You can tell me anything." Lincoln pulled away, but held his shoulders, looking right through Ben's soul with a heavy brow. "You can always rely on me. Always. Because no matter what, I love you."
Ben swallowed back some of his sadness. "I love you too."
Lincoln nodded. He switched positions, holding Ben's face for just a moment. He let Ben go and added one last thing. "Take care of yourself, Ben. Nobody could ever replace you."
"Ok." Ben nodded. "I'll meet you out there in a second."
"Do you want me to rough Nino up?"
Ben laughed. "No, it's ok. It's going to be ok."
That seemed to satisfy Lincoln enough, so he walked out of the bathroom, leaving Ben alone. Ben looked back at the mirror, trying to figure out what face he just showed Lincoln. He washed his face again, his bangs officially soaked. He ran his fingers through his hair and pushed himself to return to the heat and music, pushing through the beaded curtains. It was layer after layer of rainbow curtains.
They even dressed the hallway up in vintage concert posters and a huge neon red sign that just said, "stay groovy". His hand knocked into someone else's as he went through the next waterfall of beads. Ben jumped, stopping himself before he collided with Tim.
"Oh! Sorry," Ben said, laughing nervously.
"Sorry." Tim chuckled a little, studying him. "I was just checking on you. I've never seen you drunk." It might've been a tease, but the man has never looked fonder of Ben. He reached up, gently touching Ben's cheek. Lincoln might've touched him too, but there wasn't heat in Lincoln's touch. Tim's touch made Ben's skin simmer.
"Yeah," Ben whispered, feeling shy all of a sudden. He folded back through the curtain and rested against the wall. His eyes ended up on the buttons of Tim's shirt. Anywhere but his face or he might pass away. "I don't really know what came over me tonight. Guess I just wanted a weekend off."
"And you're having fun?" Tim asked, resting his hand on the wall.
Ben smiled. "Yeah."
Tim hooked his fingers under Ben's chin, making him look up. Covering Ben's skin with chills, Tim didn't lift his touch, dragging his thumb back and forth from his chin to his jaw. "I'm glad we could run into each other."
"It really worked out, huh?"
"So, you're happy to see me?"
Ben smiled wider, looking down again. He felt grateful for the red neon and the alcohol that had already turned his face red, sparring him from more embarrassment. "I'm happy to see you."
"I'm happy to see you too. You know you still owe me a date."
"I do, don't I?"
Taking Tim's free hand, Ben turned his palm over and wrote "IOU", dotting it with a period. Ben promised him, "The next time I see you, I'll be taking you out on a date. So, you better be ready."
As Tim nodded, his eyes drifted to Ben's lips, and Ben did the same. His heart slammed against his chest, rattling Ben to his core. Moving a little closer, Tim double checked Ben's reaction, making sure he could move closer again. Ben tilted his head the other way and all the space was gone. Tim kissed Ben as Ben slipped his fingers through Tim's, interlocking together.
Tim lifted his head, opening his mouth and as he deepened the kiss, Ben was pressed deeper against the wall. Tim bent his arm, giving Ben protection from the club. Yet, Ben's thoughts were everywhere else.
Taking a deep breath, Ben followed Tim's lead, and every kiss was like little pops of fireworks flickering and tickling his skin. Ben also wondered if Lincoln was worried that he still hadn't caught up with him. Tim unlocked their hands so he could touch Ben's waist. Ben cupped his neck and thought about Nino, hoping he was having fun, hoping the guys were being nice to him.
Then someone appeared through the curtain, and Ben's stomach sank.