"Others need weeks and months to fall in love, and to fall in love barely, so they still need meetings, common interests, mutual recognition. For me, everything fit into one wave of eyelashes"
Lisa's POV
It is unlikely that I will ever be able to understand people who believe that if your life is calm and measured, then it is boring. I look at Chaeyoung, who suffers from a non-reciprocal love for Jennie, at Hiromi, a Japanese woman, her neighbor from below, who earns a living for herself and her two-year-old daughter by prostitution, at model employees who are too dependent on other people's opinions and diets bring themselves to anorexia. I even sympathize with Kim, despite the fact that Rosie is so heartbroken for her, it's just that this girl's life is not sweet, so she... is looking for an outlet for her emotions. And now, looking at the obscurantism reigning around, I am grateful to all the gods that there have been no special shocks in my life.
I was lucky to be born and grow up in a loving family, even though I didn't have a real father, my stepfather completely replaced him, and I always called him "daddy". We never had much conflict with our parents, if there were disagreements, we quickly found compromises, and everyone remained in the black. Now, living in Korea, I miss them quite a lot, because I don't have the opportunity to fly to Thailand often. Nevertheless, I do not give in spirit in any case, we call at least once a week by video call, and once or twice a year I even manage to visit them.
Thanks, in particular, to my parents, a healthy psyche was a pleasant bonus to my personality, I fully accepted and loved myself, had a healthy egoism. In addition, I quickly determined which relationships could be toxic for me, because of this I did not date anyone for a long time, but this was rather a plus, since time was freed up for new acquaintances, and I was sure that I would eventually meet my man.
In addition, I have never been intimidated by other people's assessments, I did not take them to heart, even an incredible number of haters who did not like that there was a Thai model in a Korean magazine did not hurt me with their comments. Yes, it was unpleasant, but not fatal, I would not give up everything because of this and "return to my homeland", as these people put it. I could even put my manager on the spot, for whom I was either recovered or lost weight, because he himself does not understand that this way you will not please him. Yes, and I considered myself very collapsible and loved my body, so I did not want to radically change to please someone.
On Friday, after Rose left for University, I saw that my teachings about Jennie irritated her, I began to polish the work surface to shine. There were few visitors, the time was moving towards ten, and everyone was already sitting in their offices, so I was able to put everything in perfect order when the bell above the door announced the arrival of a new client. I was fixated on a small coffee spot in the corner of the countertop, so I looked up only when heavy footsteps approached the cash register.
The girl who appeared before my eyes was from the type of Korean women who perfectly fit the standards of beauty in this country, well, she definitely came from some aristocratic family. As soon as she was not cold at all, she smiled in greeting, and her lips formed a beautiful heart, I examined every feature of her face, falling out of reality, she had to cough to bring me back from heaven to earth.
-E-excuse me, good afternoon.- I hesitated and bowed slightly.- What do you want to order?
-Caramel cappuccino.- The girl replied in a low, velvety voice.- And add some nutmeg, please.
-Yes, of course.
I began to make a drink, every now and then casting sidelong glances at the stranger, her long slightly curled black hair lay on the countertop with the ends, and her eyes carefully studied the room and ... me? Perhaps she felt recognition, saw me in some magazine or at a fashion show.
-La-li-sa Ma-no-ban.- The girl pronounced the syllables, still looking at me.
-Eh? How do you know my name?- I was perplexed, but then I realized that she could really see me in the magazine.
-It's written on your badge, fool.
The stranger laughed softly, and her laugh was so ringing and beautiful that I couldn't even be offended by her "fool", I just blushed and smiled shyly, returning to the preparation of the drink. I finished with the cappuccino and took a marker to sign the cup, then looked at the girl.
-May I know your name?
-Kim Jisoo.- She replied, having already moved away from laughter.
-Do you want to sign in English or Korean?
-Whatever you like.- Her lips formed a heart-shaped smile again.
I made a few light movements with my hand and handed the cup to the visitor with the name "Jisoo" printed on it. She looked at the inscription, nodded gratefully to me and headed for the exit, now I could see her full height, even from behind: black wavy hair streamed over her shoulders and back, beautiful wide hips swayed slightly to the beat of her movements, but her legs... from the foot itself and to the space just above the knee, they were held in some tubes made of metal sticks and strong belts, I didn't even know the name of these things, and Kim herself relied on a kind of crutches with a support system for elbows, too. What happened to her? Just before the door, she turned around and looked at me with her usual smile, but this time it seemed more like a mask to me.
-Maybe I'll see you again, Lalisa Manoban.- Jisoo said and left the coffee shop.
-I hope Kim Jisoo. - I whispered, because there was no one to listen to me anymore.
From that moment on, I could no longer get this girl out of my head, I spent the whole working day thinking about her, renewing her face in my head again and again, at home I tried to find her page in any social networks, but it all ended with the fact that I began to complain about the system of Korean names and surnames, because there were hundreds of girls with a similar nickname. Even sadder was that she might not have used her name in the account at all. I went to bed with a longing in my soul, and in a dream she came to me, smiled with her heart-shaped lips and laughed loudly. Before Kim Jisoo walked into the coffee shop, I didn't believe in love at first sight.
-Rose, I'm such a fool.- I whined, lying on the countertop the next morning.- I didn't even recognize her number. What if she doesn't come here anymore?
-Come on, Lisa, what if she just moved to this area recently, and now she will often come here?
Rose listened attentively to my story about yesterday's client, who fell into my heart, while Jennie, I was very surprised that they came together, visited the restroom. There were no new hickeys visible on Park's neck, and the recent ones had gone down slightly, and I thought with my left hand that they had nothing that night, and then Chaeyoung, taking advantage of Kim's absence, told me how she picked her up drunk from the club at night, and in the morning they still slept together, but, as she assured blonde, Jennie has never been so gentle with her. How can Kim even do this to a person she doesn't love? But even more than that, I was worried that Rose continued to play by her rules, as if she didn't care about herself.
-Have you tried to look for her in KakaoTalk or Instagram?- She's asking me a question.
-I tried, of course, but do you know how many accounts named Kim Jisoo are on the Internet?- I continued to be indignant, slightly hitting the table top with my fist.- Stupid Korean names.
-Kim Jisoo, you say?- Jennie asked, who came up to us, I just nodded, feeling the hope that the girl might know something about her.- Does she have some... features?
-Well... she has problems with her legs, they have these type of holders... I do not know what it is called.
Jennie began to rummage through her phone, and then handed it to me, on the screen there was a photo of a girl in the graduation attire of some American University in an embrace with an elderly man, my yesterday's client was easily recognized in the facial features. The inscription next to it read: "Kim Jisoo, a graduate of Yale University with one of the highest scores in literature, returns to her homeland after graduation."
-Is that her?- Rose asked.
-Y-yes.- I answered quietly, mesmerized by the photo, and then turned my gaze to Jennie.- Do you know her?
-I read some of her books that she wrote during her studies, an interesting style, and even her not native English is very good.- The girl said.- But I recently found this article.
-Is her data there? Phone number? Maybe an email or an address?
-They don't give out personal information.- Jennie sighed and shoved the phone back into her jeans pocket.- But since she's back in Korea, maybe she'll come here again.
-Will you let me read her books?- I wanted to find any way to find out more about the girl.- And also, please forward this article to me.
-Okay, I'll forward it.- The girl answered me.- And I can bring you books in the evening after work. Don't you have any photo shoots today?
-No, I'll be at home and I'll be waiting for you.
-Well, okay, so we've decided.- Roseanne chimed in.- I still have to clean up the house before work, so we'll go.
-Yeah, and I have a tour for a young family about the house.- Jennie supported and picked up her black coffee, after which she and Park left the coffee shop.
I finished my shift and headed home, where I took a shower and changed into a large black-and-white striped T-shirt and gray sweatpants. I already had the idea of sitting down at my laptop, following the link sent by Jennie, and reading an article about Kim Jisoo, when suddenly the doorbell rang. I thought it was Jennie herself, forgetting that it was still a little early, and I was very surprised when I saw Hiromi on the threshold, holding her little daughter's hand.
-Good evening.- I greeted her with a smile.
-Hi, Lisa.- She responded, but it was noticeable that the woman was nervous.- Are you busy today?
-No, I didn't plan anything else for this day.
-Can you sit with Yumiko while I'm... at work?- Hiromi asked.
-Yes, no problem.- I squatted down to be on the same level with the girl, and held out my hand to her.- Hi, will you come to visit me?
-Hi.- Yumiko smiled at me and shook my hand.- Yes.
-Thank you, Lalisa, you always help me out.- Hiromi visibly relaxed after my positive response.- Probably, as usual...
-I'll bring her in the morning.- I finished for the woman, and she nodded.- Be careful, please.
-I'll try.
Hiromi left, and I took Yumiko to my apartment. The girl was playing with toys that I had been storing for a long time while I was messing with dinner, I rarely cooked at home, but since I have a little guest today, I have to make sure that she eats healthy homemade food. It wasn't the first time Hiromi had left her daughter with me while she was working, I didn't have to bother with Yumiko, she was a calm and kind child. The only thing that bothered me was how she would react to her mom's occupation when she grew up, and how her peers and other adults would treat her. I sometimes notice how the old ladies from our house look askance at them and whisper that Hiromi will raise the same "whore" from the girl, to quote verbatim.
-I didn't know you had children.- She said.
-No, I don't have them, I look after my neighbor's daughter from downstairs sometimes.- I explained with a slight smile.- She's staying with me tonight, sleeping in the bedroom.
-Would you like a child yourself? Well, not now, but in general?
-Yes, I think, yes, I love children, but I don't have enough experience, and financially I'm still not so confident on my feet. And, of course, I would like to have a boyfriend or girlfriend to raise a baby together.
-A girlfriend?- Jennie asked in surprise, to which I just nodded, and a slight smile blossomed on the lips of the elder, which quickly faded.- Kim Jisoo would have beautiful children, although... she can hardly have them.
-What's wrong with her legs?- I was very concerned about this aspect, but personally I would definitely not ask a girl such a question, it would be tactless.
-Honestly, I don't know myself, she didn't talk about it in any interviews or articles.- Jennie sighed and took a few small sips from her mug.- Probably, this topic is too painful for her.
-Okay, I think if we meet again and establish contact, she will tell. But Jennie, what about you?
-What are you talking about?
-About children.- I smiled.- Do you want them?
-Yes, I really want to, but there will be a time and a place for this when I find my beloved man.
Sometimes I was annoyed by this hypocrisy in her, she calmly fucked Rose, who secretly loved her, pretended not to notice the girl's feelings, and then went on a date with another guy. Even if you're not interested in your gender, at least don't harass the blonde. I can only hope for Park's reasonableness, the least I want is for my friend to suffer. And Jennie, as if she didn't care, I washed the mugs for us, then went to the table, she had already risen from her chair and quickly approached me.
-But, as long as I don't have anyone permanent, I can have a little fun.- She was reaching for a kiss, but I immediately pushed her away from me.
-I am not Chaeyoung.- I tried to cool her down. - This trick won't work with me.
-What are you talking about?- Kim wondered.
-She loves you! And you had to be blind, Jennie, not to notice it!
I blurted out these words without really thinking, but then I decided that so be it. Even if Park blames me later, I'm ready to apologize to her, because she herself would never admit. The next moment, I watched Jennie grab her bag and leave the apartment. Well, okay, at least she left the books, for which I sat down, making sure that Yumiko was sleeping peacefully, and my cry did not disturb her.
Jisoo turned out to be a good writer, I couldn't sleep for a long time while reading, and then I was very impressed all day at work in a coffee shop. She prescribed the personalities of the characters, their emotions and experiences so well that you could feel like a full-fledged participant in the story, get used to the people described. And through her texts, I got to know Kim herself better. I have always been able to understand others quite easily, and I caught a thread of some kind of isolation in Jisoo through one of her characters. No, she was well able to prescribe everyone else, but Margot... it seemed to me that Kim took a lot of her appearance to describe her, the only thing that distinguished the heroine was European features, as if Jisoo had some kind of conflict with her Asian appearance. Or I'm just exaggerating.
-Lalisa, turn your head a little to the left.- The photographer was not in a good mood today, and I quickly complied with his request, and he again clung to the camera with his eyes, and a smile appeared on his face for the first time that day.- Great, now freeze.
Twenty minutes later, the photo shoot was over, and I changed back into my clothes. It was cool outside, so a yellow hoodie was immediately thrown over the T-shirt, I said goodbye to the photographer and stylists, and then went outside. I didn't really want to go home, and I decided to go to a gaming club in order to chop into vending machines and have a snack, I liked that, unlike the Western world, this activity remains relevant in Asian countries. I want to go to Japan someday to plunge into it, and, of course, into the world of anime and other gifts of the land of the rising sun, which I love.
Many of the seats behind the machines were occupied, and I went to the only one available, for two players, on the other side there was a young guy who was deep in thought because he didn't know who to play with. I settled down on the other side and smiled at him, saying, let's just play, without dating. He was glad of the company, so soon our characters were fighting hard in the ring, a stranger won in the first round, I won in the second, the third round was very tense, but I managed to come to victory.
-You play well!- The guy exclaimed, he didn't look sad because he lost.- Thank you for keeping me company.
I just now noticed that he was too young, a high school student or a first- or second-year student, not quite proportional yet and with long-uncut hair. A kind of tramp, as if he ran away from home after a quarrel with his parents or just couldn't sleep and went out for a walk, didn't even comb his hair.
-You're welcome, I had fun myself, you're a worthy opponent.- Exchanging pleasantries is not the worst thing to do.
-I have to go now.- The guy glanced at the watch that was held on a thin wrist.- Maybe someday we'll meet again and play.
-Maybe.- I smiled.
-Goodbye!
He was leaving the club, waving his hand at me, I just threw my open palm up, and it's clear to a fool that we are unlikely to meet again, Seoul is not some small village where everyone knows each other. All this is just typical Asian politeness, but ... what is heaven not joking about? I find a free slot machine for one player and lose several times, because the tasks turn out to be really difficult, I have dinner right there and go home. Until late at night, I am again sitting at the first book written by Kim Jisoo and cherish the hope that we will meet again someday.
I went to work at the coffee shop in a half-asleep state, because I was distracted from reading only when there were only two hours left before my usual awakening. I took orders, sometimes I thought too much from the desire to sleep and the emotions presented by the book, it seemed to me that I was still in her world. Margot fell in love with her subject Joanna, who first reciprocated her, and then escaped from the palace, met the brave warrior Thornton at freedom and gave her heart to him. Margot suffered greatly after losing her lover, and then, when Joanna and Thornton were captured by her, she recaptured Thornton from the girl by getting him drunk...
-Excuse me, miss.- The guy standing at the cash register drew my attention to himself, it seems that I was thinking too much and did not notice his appearance.- Are you feeling unwell?
-No... no, I'm all right.- I nodded my head, returning to reality.- What will you order?
-One Americano with ice and one caramel cappuccino with nutmeg, please.
I froze for a moment, because this is what Jisoo ordered from me, caramel cappuccino with nutmeg, it even seemed to me that the visitor said it in her velvety, ear-caressing voice, but then... Isn't there at least one more lover of this drink in Korea? Moreover, I met them before Kim. I made both drinks and handed them to the guy, who said that you don't have to sign. Through the large window of the coffee shop, I watched as a stranger in an expensive suit got into the car and handed a cappuccino... Is this really Jisoo?