A/N: for all you angst lovers out there. scroll ↓
i wake up, and take a look around. it's still dark outside... i wonder what time it is, everyone's still sleeping. i check my phone. 5:00AM. ugh... i have to go to the bathroom. i stand up and begin to make my way there. when i enter the hallway containing the bedrooms and the bathrooms, i look around... oh. BASIL's door is slightly open. maybe he's finally ready to open up to somebody? i tiptoe over to the door, trying not to make too much noise, in case he's asleep. i stand still for a moment. am i intruding?? i decide i'll just take a quick peek to see if he's okay. i slowly push the door open, and it creaks a bit.
"BASIL?" i call out, softly.
there is no response.
i enter the room, looking over at his bed. there is nobody in it. i look in front of me at the window. i can see something just underneath it, but i can't quite make out what it is.
"...BASIL??"
it takes a minute for my eyes to finally adjust to the darkness of his room, and once they finally do...
i see the horrifying sight that the moonlight from his window illuminates. a scream escapes from my mouth and i stagger backwards, nearly falling to the floor. tears flood my eyes and i know there's no stopping them. i regain my composure before running to BASIL's side, falling onto my knees.
"BASIL..." i manage to choke between sobs.
my hand raises towards his neck to check if he still has a pulse, but do i even want to know? i'm afraid i won't be able to handle the answer. i push two of my fingers down on a spot just below his chin.
this person is not breathing.
"BASIL?? is everything..." HERO pauses. "...oh my god, BASIL... KEL, COME HERE!! AUBREY, GET POLLY!!"
"HERO?? what's... wrong..." KEL slowly walks towards us. "what... what's going on??"
"Y/N, what happened?!?!" HERO asks me, frantically.
"i-i don't know..." i cry. "i woke up and had to go to the bathroom... but i saw that his door was open. so i came to check on him... and found him... like this."
"oh, BASIL..."
"is everyone okay?? what's wrong??" POLLY runs to the room with AUBREY trailing behind and turns on the light, and when she sees the sight in front of her, her eyes widen in complete shock and horror. "BASIL!!" she runs and falls in front of him, brushing the hair out of his eyes. "BASIL... SOMEONE CALL AN AMBULANCE!!" i can see her blinking back tears, trying to compose herself in front of the children.
KEL runs out to the phone.
i stand up shakily, having to place both my hands on the wall behind me to steady myself. i begin to walk out of the room, leaving everyone else behind, except for one.
"Y/N?? Y/N, wait," HERO follows after me.
i keep walking, trying to force back my tears. this all must be a bad dream, right?! everything is going to be okay... everything is going to be okay... everything is going to be okay... everything is going to be-
i'm spun around and arms wrap around me tightly. tears spill out from my eyes, as i can no longer contain them. after a hug that i wish would of lasted longer, i'm met with a familiar face. "i bet this isn't necessarily how you expected your first few days in FARAWAY to go, huh?"
i only respond with more tears.
"i'm so sorry, Y/N. everything is going to be okay. i promise you. BASIL will pull through... right?"
i pause, wondering if he's trying to convince me or himself. "...i sure fucking hope so." i sob in his arms, barely able to keep myself standing until the ambulance arrives.
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"well, this has been one hell of a night, hasn't it?" i say, holding his hand firmly, scared he might slip away if i let go.
"it sure has." BASIL responds.
"...i love you so much," i whisper, staring down at the ground.
...
"if you loved me, why did you let me die?"
i look back up quickly, only to be met with a sinister smile.
"w-what? but... you didn't-"
"don't try to escape this, Y/N. don't try to deny the truth like SUNNY did for so long."
"BASIL, i-"
"if you would of just came to me sooner. you could of saved me, Y/N."
"i'm so sorry, BASIL..." i say, tears spilling down my cheeks. "i'm so, so sorry..."
"sorry doesn't cut it. why don't you join me down here? you deserve it."
"no... NO! I'M SORRY!! PLEASE, BASIL, I'M SORRY!!" BASIL drags me towards him, red flaring in his eyes.
"sure you are, Y/N."
"...Y/N... Y/N!!"
i jolt up, sobbing and sweating. i look around frantically. "no... BASIL..."
HERO is kneeling in front of me, concerned. AUBREY and KEL as well. SUNNY stands in the corner, the same neutral look plastered on his stupid, insensitive, asshole face. HERO pulls the three of us in for a group hug ad i continue crying. they give me a minute to compose myself before asking me to explain my nightmare. i had taken a nap, attempting to avoid the pain of what had happened the night before.
"god, Y/N... i'm so sorry," AUBREY replies.
"you know that none of this is your fault, right, Y/N? please don't think that," KEL says, concerned.
"oh, no, i know..." i say, standing up. "i know it isn't my fault, but i know exactly who's fault it is."
HERO, KEL and AUBREY seem confused.
i step around them and make my way towards SUNNY.
"it's all your fault." i look at him with the same deadpan look of which he has always looked at me, and BASIL, and everyone else with. "and you know it's your fault. who disappears for four years when your friends needed you most? instead of coming together and becoming stronger you divided everyone apart."
"Y/N... come on, i know this is hard but it was nobody's-"
"no, i'm just saying what everyone's been thinking... even SUNNY."
i swear with those last words i can see a slight smile on SUNNY's face. more emotion than i've ever seen from him before, i suppose.
"maybe you should get some fresh air... come on, Y/N." KEL leads me outside, leaving AUBREY and HERO inside with that emotionless psycho. i sit on the steps and lay my head on my knees.
"i can't do this," i admit to KEL. "i physically and mentally can not."
"it's been hard on all of us, Y/N. and especially on you... i'm so sorry you had to go through this on your first days in FARAWAY. not really a good way to start it out, huh?"
"he didn't deserve that. why did he do it?? did he really hate life that much?? and how didn't we know??"
"those are the same questions all of us asked ourselves with MARI. sometimes... you don't see the hidden pain inside someone. it can be hard, especially if they're really good at hiding it. it's nobodys fault, what happened. all we can do is move forward and remember him. remember MARI. remember anyone we've lost."
i pause. "this must be a lot harder on you all than it is on me. how are the three of you so composed?"
"HERO tries to be there for everyone, he wants to be the strong one. AUBREY committed to her tough act. and me... i'm relatively similar to HERO. we are brothers, after all. as for SUNNY... i don't know. he hasn't been the same since MARI's passing... but i guess none of us really have. but i don't think that makes this any harder for us than you. i mean, you were the one to find him. you saw one of your friends, dead. this wasn't necessarily our first rodeo."
"i'm so sorry, KEL."
"i'm so sorry, Y/N."
"this is the type of thing that would happen to me, me and my bad luck." i manage to give a half-hearted laugh. "i just don't know how i'm going to move on. images of last night just keep flashing through my head, constantly. i had a nightmare about it. i can't stop crying," i ironically begin crying again, and then laugh. "i just don't know what to do. it is going to be this way forever?"
"it definitely won't be this way forever" KEL reassures. "i mean, you'll always miss him. you'll always have the trauma of last night, of seeing a dead friend. you'll always wish it didn't happen. and you'll always feel a twinge of regret and guilt. people say that it's gonna get better, and that you have to move on, but that's only true if you put in the effort. don't ignore your feelings, acknowledge them and grieve properly. and then keep going. you don't have to move on. none of us have moved on from MARI. after 4 years we still miss her the same. hell, HERO hasn't even tried to start dating again. our lives didn't just go back to normal. and they never will. and yours never will. but you can make a new normal."
"...i didn't think you could be so inspirational," i respond to KEL's kind words.
"...thanks??" KEL laughs. he pulls me in for a hug, and for once in the last 12 hours, i feel like i may be able to actually keep going.
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"BYE, SUNNY!!" KEL yells, frantically waving at the car moving down the street.
"bye, SUNNY! don't forget about us!!" HERO says, smiling.
"goodbye... SUNNY." AUBREY states, staring down at the ground.
"we're gonna be okay, right guys?" i ask the three of them.
"yeah," AUBREY responds. "we are."
"we're gonna make our new normal, however that may be," KEL replies.
"as a good friend once told me," HERO starts, "everything is going to be okay."
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word count: 1696
(A/N: Y'ALL I AM SO SORRY... THIS PHYSICALLY HURT TO WRITE BUT YOU KNOW I HAD TO DO IT TO YOU... i thought i was completely done with this story and moved on to "new memories, old memories", but THEN i realized what more i could do with this book.
⚠️ DISCLAIMER: this chapter of OMORI's neutral ending is NOT canon to the "new friend, old friend" book. the FIRST part (the good ending) of chapter eight is the CANON ending of "new friend, old friend", as it is necessary to continue into my sequel book, "new memories, old memories". ⚠️
so don't worry guys, BASIL is still alive in both of my books, this is just a fun angst chapter i had the idea of writing. i hope you enjoyed (even though it made me so sad to write and probably made you so sad to read 😭) and EXPECT NEW UPDATES for "new memories, old memories" SOON! i expect to be able to put out a few new chapters and even possibly end the book and begin a new one over the course of the summer. thank you so much for all your support, i really appreciate it and i never expected my silly little BASIL x reader book to get this far. i love you all, have a great day/night 💗)