I looked up from my phone to make sure that everything was actually happening. She chose me? out of everyone she could have chosen she picked me. This made me smile, I could feel my heart beat faster as time progressed.
Camila: you want to come to the amusement park with me? :))
Lauren: of course! who wouldn't want to?!
Camila: tell that to Dinah and Ally :( but sweet! we're going Saturday around 10 AM, you can meet me at my house, and we can take one car there!
Lauren: Okay! gimme your address later after school
with that the conversation ended. I was now extremely nervous. I'll be going to her house! This will be helpful though; I'll find out more about her and actually spend some time with her that's not being shoved by or shoving her for a ball during practice. Justin seems to notice that my demeanor has changed.
"Someone's feeling better?" I can hear the smirk in his voice "who you texting? Anthony?" I look at him and roll my eyes a bit "why would I be texting Anthony?" I say in a playful defensive voice "no reason" he says a bit differently "look whose being weird now." I try to lighten the mood. "If you aren't texting Anthony then who are you texting?" this comment alone makes me think he's trying to get information for Anthony.
Anthony and I dated our freshman year, but we were very young and would get into silly arguments way too much. He would get very jealous and very possessive. It was too much for me, I didn't like it. After a few months of us dating I had to break up with him, he was moving too fast, he dropped the "I love you " bomb after the first week, I didn't say it back and it made me feel horrible, but I don't throw that word around lightly and it was getting to be too much.
"I'm texting my soccer group chat, the girls are funny, and it brought me out of my mood" I didn't totally lie, I mean I did text the chat, but it wasn't them who brought me out of my mood, but he doesn't need to know that.
-
The bell rang, while we are packing up our things Justin asks me if I'll be sitting with them during lunch and I tell him yeah but that I had to go to my locker first. As I'm putting my books away and grabbing my earbuds so that I can listen to music during lunch I see someone walk up to me from the corner of my eye, I look to my right and it's Anthony. I just know for a fact that Justin told him that I'll be at my locker because those two usually go to lunch together.
"hey you" he says softly with a small smile, "hey" I smile back "want to go to the lunchroom or you want to walk around and find a spot to sit and talk?" knowing that Normani was going to be with her boyfriend I chose to walk around with Anthony, it would be a bit more peaceful than being in a loud lunchroom.
while we are walking through the hallways of the school we fall into an easy conversation, while I watch Anthoiny talk about some new game he got and how much he likes it I can't help but think that everything would be easy if I were to date Anthony again. We find a few chairs that were stacked near a table by the choir room on the other side of the school. We get the chairs to the table, and we sit in a comfortable silence for a bit before he breaks the silence.
"So... are you seeing anyone?" I'm shocked that he honestly just straight up just asked me, I thought he would at least ease into it, I wait for the people who are walking by us to leave before I answer him "no I'm not seeing anyone right now, why?" I'm just going to play dumb and see where this goes. "I-I'm just wondering...you know I'm not seeing anyone right now either." "Why not?" "No particular reason, I have my eye on someone though" as he's saying that he's leaning in a bit closer to me. I'm not leaning back but I'm also not leaning in closer "who may that be?" during this I can hear a group of people laughing and the sounds were getting closer and closer. I would be lying if I wasn't thinking about leaning in, he's an attractive guy, but when I looked over towards the way the sound was coming from, I saw the absolute last person I wanted to be seeing. Camila looks over my way and sees the position I am in with Anthony, and this made me panic inside.
She is walking with Dinah, Ally, and some other girls that were in her grade on the soccer team. The girls that were with her saw us and began to awe at us and I could hear Dinah say something along the lines of "get it girl" loudly. Camila didn't smile nor did she laugh at the girls' antics; she seemed a bit bothered by it but I'm too flustered to dissect what's happening. I lean back away from Anthony, and I stand up and suggest that we should go to the lunchroom with everyone else.
On the way to the lunchroom the tension between Anthony and I was pretty thick. I'm still on the fence about if I want to be with Anthony or not. I honestly don't want to think about it. The only thing on my mind is Camila, she saw us, and I don't know why but it bothered me. I want to talk to Mani about this or Justin, someone honestly, if I had to choose, I think Justin is my best bet, then again Mani is my closest friend.
"hey I want to apologize for earlier... that-" "it's okay" I say a bit fast to cut him off "we don't have to dwell on it lets just meet up with everyone" I start to walk a bit faster, he's a bit behind me before he slightly jogs to catch up to me "hey I really didn't mean to make you uncomfortable" he grabs my arm to make me turn around "I just want you to know that I still have some feelings for you and when you're ready I'll be here waiting for you" I open my mouth to say something but no words come out, I sigh a little "I'm a bit confused right now Anthony, give me a bit of time okay? I need to figure some things out" he lets go of my arm and smiles softly "okay."
When we reach the lunchroom, I could see a very annoyed Normani walking towards me. "Excuse me where the hell were you? I had to sit here with these guys by myself! They bullied me!" she says rather loudly, I could hear the boys chuckling behind her, she wasn't actually angry with me or them "I was with Anthony" I can see her look over towards Anthony, an evil grin makes its way upon her face "nothing happened" I say as I roll my eyes "whatever you say, come walk with me" with that she pulls me over to walk towards the bathrooms so that we can talk " I want all the details now."
-
"How was school mija?" I put my bags in the back seat, and I pull my earbuds out of my pocket and put one in my ear "it was good ma, nothing interesting happened, I was invited to go to an amusement park tomorrow just so you know" on the drive to my house I feel my phone vibrate. I look down and it's a message from someone, I'm going to ignore it.... but what if it's from Camila? I immediately check who it's from and it actually was from her, my heart skipped a beat.
Camila: hey we still on for tomorrow? you haven't forgotten right?
honestly how could I forget, the thought of us hanging out together alone makes me anxious.
Lauren: I totally am! how could I forget!
Camila: okay cool! I'll send my address.
after she sends her address and I save it to my phone I pick Chateau by Djo to listen to while my mom drives us home. My mom notices that I'm smiling at my phone "who are you texting mija" I look over towards her in a small panic "no one... I'm just texting the girls from the team; we are talking about how practice was canceled today." "Ah okay..." with that the conversation between us ended, she turned her music on, and I just enjoyed the ride home.
Camila: so how was school today?
Camila: I'm so bad at making small talk omg.
Camila: I just want to talk to you lol.
Camila: your friend is Normani right?
While I'm reading through the messages, she sent me I can't help but laugh, she's so cute it hurts, but why is she asking about Normani? She wants to talk to me? I feel all warm inside, I've never been like this with anyone I've dated before.
Lauren: my day was... something, very confusing. I think you're doing just fine, what can I say? I'd want to talk to me too honestly ;) and yah Mani is my friend why??
Camila: oh! sorry about Dinah today, didn't mean to ruin anything that was happening today with you and that guy...
Camila: you're annoying HAHA, what you don't want to talk to me? :(((((
Camila: It's just I don't think she likes me very much... we have ballroom together and I just get a sense that she might not like me, I don't know I might just be crazy.
Lauren: she didn't ruin anything! if anything you guys saved me haha
Lauren: hmmmmm I'm not sureeee you're out here calling me annoying</3 jk I do want to talk to you too :)
Lauren: I'm going to ask her about that on Monday, that's a bit weird Mani doesn't usually have problems with people especially people she doesn't really know.
Camila: good to know ;)
Camila: Hey I've got to go now but I'll see you tomorrow! byee :)
Lauren: okay, I'll text you! byeee:)
Why would Mani have a problem with Camila? if Mani did actually have a problem with her then Mani wouldn't be a very good person to talk about what I'm feeling with, plus Mani is team Anthony. I get why she would be; she doesn't know the whole story and she was the one to get us together the first time we dated. She told him to ask me out at one of our school dances back in freshman year. She was probably sadder than I was when I broke up with him.
All I know is that I'll be seeing Camila tomorrow and that alone made my cheeks hurt from smiling so hard. Can it be morning already?