Newt's POV:
I saw Minho leave. I wanted him to come back, but I couldn't follow him. I felt Alby carry me to the med-jack hut. I felt the med-jacks roll up my pants to look at my leg. I felt them put something cold on it. Then I felt them put something soft on it. Then they gave me a pill, and I was asleep. When I woke up, I saw Alby.
"Newt, Minho told me what happened. Why didn't you tell someone how you felt?"
Because I was stupid. It was stupid to feel like that. It didn't even work because of how stupid I had been.
"I don't know."
Alby sighed.
"Tell me."
Great. Don't get me wrong, I love Alby. he's like my second best friend other than Minho, but I really didn't wanna talk about this now.
"Because I felt stupid. No one wanted to hear about that. No one else ever felt that way, and I was just being an idiot. I was so stupid, it didn't even work."
No more tears were left in me. I still felt empty.
Alby stood up from the chair he'd been sitting in, and walked over to me.
"Newt. That's not true."
"What's not true?"
"All of it."
"That's a bloody lie."
"No it's not."
I had been looking straight ahead this whole time, but now I looked at Alby. He looked worried and slightly scared.
"Newt, I've had people come talk to me about that all the time. We talk, and now they live as happily as you can here in the maze. And I'm sure as shuck not the only person who'd want to hear about that."
"Oh, yeah? Who?"
"Come on. Minho, you shank! He was so sad, he could barely tell me what happened! That shank loves you to the moon and back, and he would always listen to you!"
Geez. I'd never even thought about that. Maybe when I could get up again I'd go talk to him. . .
Minho's POV:
I don't know how long I've been in Newt's secret spot. I don't have a sense of time anymore. It was my fault. I should have been there for him. I should have noticed. My throat ached from crying, but I couldn't stop. My throat felt as though there was a giant lump in my throat, but I didn't stop. I lay there in a tight ball, hugging myself and shaking, while silently crying for who knows how long. At one point I drifted off, but just dreamed of Newt laying there broken. I tried to stay awake after that. I heard footsteps, and sat up. Was it Newt? No you idiot, it's not Newt. It was Alby. When he came, I stepped out of the spot, and it felt as though someone had taken away a cozy blanket. I was doused in cold, and felt a fresh wave of tears fall from my eyes.
"What the shuck do you want?"
I wasn't in the mood for this.
"I just wanted to tell you that Newt isn't the first glader to feel this way."
"Well, was he the first to jump off?"
"Um. . . yeah, but my point is everythings gonna be okay."
It will all be okay
Those words were what I said to Newt before we parted, and did that turn out okay? No, it sure as shuck didn't. Those words snapped something inside me. I didn't even know my heart had more things to break.
"No. No it won't, Alby."
I was getting closer to him.
"It won't be okay."
My face was an inch away from his. I was screaming now.
"That's what I shucking told Newt!!! The night when that stupid kid said there was no way out, whenever he felt sad, it was the last shucking thing I said to him before we went to different sections!!! Did things turn out okay there? No they didn't!!! Never tell me it'll be okay again. Never!"
I fell to the ground shaking uncontrollably, my head in my hands. My small amount of remaining energy spent. Alby knelt down next to me, trying to console me.
"Shhh. Minho, it'll be o-"
I glared at him.
"I mean, Newt is awake. I spoke to him. Maybe you can visit him in the morning if you want. He could really use a friend right now."
I jumped up, and started running towards the med-jack hut, eager to see Newt. but, I had forgotten the fact I had no energy, so instead I face-planted onto the leaf strewn dirt. Alby walked over and helped me up.
"Woah, Minho, I said in the morning. You're too beat to even raise your head. Go to sleep."
Alby started helping me back to the hammocks. That was the wrong way. I wanted to stay here. I wanted to be with Newt.
"Alby, c-could I sleep here tonight?"
Alby looked at me with a slight smile.
"Yes, Minho, of course you can. I know this was your and Newt's spot as of a couple days ago."
A couple days? Has it really only been a couple of days? A couple of days ago we were laughing and joking, and now. . .
"And, I think it's needless to say, that you have the day off tomorrow."
"Th-Thanks Alby. You're the best."
"Darn right I am!"
Alby got me to the little alcove, and walked away. Leaving me alone. I drift off.
I was sitting at a bonfire with Newt
It's all black and white
Except for Newt
He was laughing
He was colorful
There were other people, but I couldn't see their faces
They were just dark outlines
I couldn't hear what they were saying
Only Newt
I couldn't feel the heat
Now I'm back in the secret spot
Again black an white
Joking with Newt
He was colorful
I couldn't smell the trees
I couldn't feel the grass
Only Newts warm body pressed to mine
Now I'm just in the glade
With Newt
Again black and white
Except for Newt
He's colorful
Again there were people
But just black shapes
I still couldn't hear them
Now I'm by the hammocks
No Newt
More black outlines
More silence
More black and white
They are all pointing at something
What?
Now I see
Newt at the top of a wall
Newt jumping
I don't see him land
Back at the bonfire
This time everythings full of color
I see people I know
I hear laughing
I feel the heat and warmth of the fire
I hear it crackling
But, Newt is faded and white
Like a ghost
I can't hear him
The fire engulfed me
Back at the secret spot
Another ghost of Newt contrasting with all the bright colors
I could smell the pine
I could feel the grass
I couldn't feel Newt
The secret spot collapses
I woke up. It's not collapsed. Good. And I'm still in it. With no Newt. Bad.
Newt's POV:
Night was just black. No dream. No thoughts. No warmth. Still numb. Still empty. What else is new? The med-jacks come in. They check my leg. They give me pills. They don't talk. Later, Alby comes in. The med-jacks leave. He comes and sits next to my bed, a serious look on his face.
"Newt,"
Oh no. I can tell this is not going to be good.
"Newt, the med-jacks have just told me something."
"Well, are you going to shucking tell me or what?"
Alby sucks in a deep breath then blows it out
"I'm trying to prepare you, because what I'm about to say could be jarring, and the med-jacks don't think it's good for you to have a breakdown right now."
Well, duh. I just tried to commit suicide, and mangled my leg. Like, no kidding I shouldn't have a breakdown right now. Tell me something I don't know.
"They told me to have you take some breaths."
I quickly inhaled and exhaled a couple times. Alby gave me a stern look.
"Bloody hell, Alby. I did it, will you just tell me?"
Alby sighed.
"Well, you know your leg is hurt right?"
No, I didn't know that. Thanks for informing me. I completely missed it. I guess some of Minho's sarcasm was rubbing off on me. Instead I just nodded.
"Well, Newt. . ."
Oh my god, just say it already. Alby took another breath. In, out.
"Newt, your leg is broken."
Okay, what's so bad about that?
"I kind of figured that, but what's the big deal about it?"
More slow breaths. In, out. In, out. In, out. I was gonna go crazy just watching him breathe like they were his last gulps of oxygen. I decided to prompt him.
"Yeah, but broken bones heal."
Alby had been fiddling with his hands, and now looked at me.
"Not this time Newt."
"Excuse me?"
"Not this time."
"Yeah, I know what you said, I just don't understand it."
Alby grabbed the headboard of my bed, and stood up
"Your leg isn't healing, Newt. you'll never be able to walk the same way again. You will be able to walk with your injury, but you'll have a limp."
Wait, what? Was that even possible? No, no that was wrong. A mistake. Just a silly little joke, not real. Not real. But it was real. Alby wouldn't lie about something like that. Wait a shucking minute
"What about running?"
"I-I'm sorry Newt. You'll be able to run, it will just be very, very painful."
I knew what that meant. Goodbye being a runner. . .
Alby had started to walk away. I called after him
"Wait, Alby, isn't this a mistake or something?"
Alby just turned and shook his head before leaving.
"Newt, it's not a mistake."
Great. Just another reason why I should die. I was left alone with these thoughts for several hours, still feeling sad. Still feeling stupid. Still feeling empty. Then the door opened, and I saw Minho. Suddenly, I had a reason to live. Minho ran to me and hugged me and kissed me. I no longer felt empty. I felt full.