To Find Something True

By _thekimskimchi_

743 111 44

🏆 THE AMBY AWARDS 2023 TOP PICKS - NOVEL FANFICTION CATEGORY 🏆 📚 FEATURED IN THE AMBASSADOR'S NEWSLETTER "... More

preface
thanks to; to readers
short info; casts; disclaimer
※ one
※ two
※ three
※ four
※ five
※ six
※ seven
※ eight
※ nine
※ ten
※ eleven
※ twelve
※ thirteen
hints to subplots
i have a question 🥲
※ fourteen
※ fifteen
※ sixteen
※ seventeen
※ eighteen
※ nineteen
※ twenty
※ twenty-one
※ twenty-two
※ twenty-three
※ twenty-four
※ twenty-five
※ twenty-six
※ twenty-seven
※ twenty-eight
※ twenty-nine
※ thirty
※ thirty-one
※ thirty-two
※ thirty-three
※ thirty-four
※ thirty-five
※ thirty-six
What is Sexual Coercion?
※ thirty-seven
※ pride month special ※
※ thirty-eight
※ thirty-nine (pt. 1)
※ thirty-nine (pt.2 ; BONUS CHAPTER)
※ forty
※ forty-one
※ forty-two
※ forty-three
※ forty-five
※ forty-six
※ forty-seven
※ forty-eight
※ forty-nine
※ fifty
※ fifty-one
※ fifty-two
※ fifty-three
※ fifty-four
※ fifty-five
※ fifty-six
※ fifty-seven
※ fifty-eight
※ fifty-nine
※ sixty
※ sixty-one
※ final
※ epilogue
letter from Jess to Jiah
Q&A [open]
Special Chapter

※ forty-four

5 1 0
By _thekimskimchi_

Author's note:

"Italicized in dialogues" – characters speak in English.

P/S: making Amber meeting a detective at a fast food restaurant was not my original plan... i was hungry and craving for fries when i wrote the scene lmao

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Somewhere in New York City, Amber waited for her detective cousin in a fast-food restaurant. Hungry, she ordered a beef burger, onion rings, and a cup of carbonated drink. After receiving her food, she carried her tray to a table beside a floor-to-ceiling window. It would be great to keep an eye on the road in case her cousin appeared out of nowhere. She poured a sufficient amount of ketchup on the plate and dipped an onion ring, taking a bite. It crunched. The ketchup's tanginess spread through her tastebuds.

Amidst the chatter of customers, the latest song of the year played through the speakers. The beeps from the touchscreen cash register were loud, chiming through the space. On weekdays in the evening, the queues were always short. The fragrance of fried chicken failed to make her salivate. It wasn't that she was lucky to have received her order already, but she was nervous about the news she would receive.

From behind her, a man (in a brown leather jacket with a signage on one of the chest pockets, black jeans as his bottom wear, and a pair of running shoes for footwear) appeared. He turned to a chair and swiftly sat across from her. "Hello there, buddy!" He reached for an onion ring.

Clicking her tongue, Amber slapped his hand away, preventing her cousin from taking it. In Korean, she spoke, "Order for yourself. Go!"

"Ah..." her cousin muttered. Looking out the window, he added, "Boyish or feminine, ladies will always be ladies."

"Excuse me?"

"Nothing!" he said, giving her a blank look. "Anyway, should I wait for you to finish your food or should we share it so you can finish quickly?"

"Judging by your tone, it's like asking whether I want the bad news later or now. Don't tell me I'll vomit at your news later."

"You sure know how my job is. And knowing you won't share your food with your starving cousin, I shall give you the good news first."

After taking a big bite of beef burger, with her mouth full, Amber asked, "you found her?"

"Obviously," Detective Eric Nam said, smiling and pointing his index finger at her. He raised another finger to show number two. He said, "And the second good news is, we found the guy too."

Before giving a comment, Amber took a piece of tissue and wiped the beef patty sauce from the corner of her lips. "That isn't good news to me. Thinking of that guy makes me want to punch his guts out."

"Watch your mouth, Bamby. I won't defend you if I catch you behind bars at my workplace."

Amber rolled her eyes, scoffing, "Duh." She put down the beef burger and said, "And what's the third good news?"

Detective Nam blinked his eyes. "Third good news?" His eyebrows raised. Shaking his head, he said, "nada." Amber raised an eyebrow. After placing his clasped palms on the table, he added, "I'm afraid I have more bad news for you. But if you want a side of good news, I can share that with you too."

He continued, "Thanks to your report, we discovered one of the human trafficking cases we've been investigating. We've saved the victims, but we're still looking for the culprits behind it. At the moment, we can't interrogate all the victims. Most of them were found in a weakened state, so our chief demands them to fully recover before we can question them." He took a moment to pause. "But I'm not surprised that guy is one of the culprits."

Amber stiffened. Her raspy voice raised, "What?"

The detective gave her a tight smile. "Luckily, one of the victims told us that Soohyuk dealt with them most of the time. She recognized him. We're still having a hard time making Soohyuk talk. His information is vague."

"How about the others?"

"That's the problem. Many of them were abused, and right now, recovery isn't the only thing they need. They have to undergo some procedures afterward."

Understanding what procedures meant, Amber said nothing. Soohyuk hadn't mentioned anything about In-Kang and Company. She wanted to help, but she thought of the risk Bejiwoo would face. But what if this could save them from the company's ties? It might be possible to save Jiwoo too. Scared, yet encouraged, she whispered in Korean, "Try... try to look up In-Kang and Company."

"In-Kang and Company?" Detective Nam asked in Korean, eyebrows scrunched up.

"Yeah..." she muttered. "He's the adopted son of the CEO. You'll find some links."

His lips flattened into a tight smile. "I'll keep that in mind."

Her heart thumped loudly against her chest. She was scared, thinking her best friend had run away with Soohyuk to join him in illegal activities. Besides, she was blindly in love with Soohyuk. If it was true, it was possible she did it for the sake of Bejiwoo. But it was too fast for her to jump to conclusions. Swallowing her saliva, she continued to ask, "What about my friend, Jiwoo?"

"Jung Jiwoo?" Amber studied her cousin's face. His joker nature had faded, leaving only seriousness on Detective Nam's face. And what Detective Nam confessed next had her stiffened. "Jung Jiwoo was one of the victims."

"Hold on," she said, raising up a hand. "Was?" Her eyebrows scrunched up.

"Yes," Detective Nam breathed after inhaling a deep breath. "She managed to escape with a victim. And," he paused with an expression that Amber couldn't read. "If you want to meet her now, I can bring you there. But be mentally prepared. She isn't in a state that, I know, you don't wish to see."

*********

As Seokjin took a day off the next day, the 'attention game' finally stopped. There hadn't been any tasks that required Jiah's help outside the office, so she stayed with Hoseok the whole time. Killing time, he heard her watching some random cooking video, though he didn't know what recipe she was watching.

Settling comfortably at her table, Hoseok was glad to see his assistant getting some rest. Even though her only task was taking care of him, Jiah used to say that it was boring to stay in the office. So, he allowed her to help the staff outside.

However, something struck him. Jiah hadn't been teasing him, and the fact that she had been staying in the office made him wonder if something was wrong. He didn't think she had a fight with anyone since she greeted them just fine that morning.

"Lee Jiah?" He called, making her look up and respond with a long, soft 'hmm?' "Be honest with me, will you?"

"Yeah, sure. What is it?"

"Are you okay?"

"Hmm..." Jiah weakly buzzed before drawling, "no."

"You look tired."

"Yeah. I don't know why I feel so tired today. Since yesterday, to be honest."

Hoseok left his seat and walked over to Jiah's table. He placed one of his palms on her forehead and another on her cheek, which surprised her. As he let her go, he said, "You don't seem to have a fever."

"I don't have a fever," Jiah confirmed.

Hoseok stared at her for a while before saying, "Don't get me wrong, but... are you on your period?" The long silence and surprised stare from her indicated that he was correct.

Jiah's mood shifted. Angry, she uttered, "So what if I'm on my period? Are you going to give me a day off?" Bewildered, the boss was speechless. Stomping her fists on the table, Jiah protested, "No! I'm not taking a day off. No!"

"I didn't say anything about giving you a day off," Hoseok said. "There's a sofa bed in the room next to this office. Go to the room now and rest. I won't cut your salary for resting, I promise."

Jiah weakly glanced at the grey-carpeted room. The sofa bed was against the concrete wall, and there were two plants in the corners. On the right side of the room, there was a bookshelf. Then, she returned her gaze to Hoseok. In a feeble tone, she said, "Fine."

"There's a blanket in the shelf," Hoseok added.

"Okay," Jiah drawled, taking her phone with her. She walked past him, pushed the door to leave the office, and went to the room. Hoseok watched as she squatted down in front of the shelf, took out a black blanket, and then pulled out a cushion from the sofa, transforming it into a bed. He didn't know who had used the bed last, but there was a pillow when she extended the bed.

Lying down and covering herself with the blanket, she settled comfortably on the bed. Hoseok kept watching to make sure she was truly comfortable. After three minutes passed, he stopped observing her. He was about to return to his table when he noticed Jiah's open notebook. It didn't look like a diary or work notes. After glancing at his assistant, he picked up the notebook.

Reading the notes, he chuckled and mumbled, "Is she craving for these?"

The pages were filled with recipes for sweet and sour pork, dumplings, pork buns, sweet red bean buns, easy Udon, French fries, and cheese sauce. He even found a note underlined that said, 'lazy? Buy!' He chuckled again, discovering more notes below with the names of various shops and restaurants.

Glancing at Jiah, who turned away from him, he thought back to the times when he had to take care of his sister during her first day of menstruation. It had been a long time since he had thought about what to get for a woman going through her period. He also remembered the times when his sister asked him to buy a pack of menstrual pads. Initially, he had no idea about the different sizes and types like "wing and non-wing." But even after all this time, he still remembered what he had learned.

Never did he think he would experience a female staff member going through her period in his workplace. As the boss, a title given to him at his sister's request, he realized that he had put his selfishness ahead of the well-being of his staff members. Because of that day, he planned to buy a few packs of menstrual pads for the female staff.

But what should he get? Non-wing or winged ones? Twenty-three centimeters or twenty-eight centimeters?

'Uhh... Panty liners too...?'

*********

The nearby shop wasn't as crowded as he had expected that afternoon. High school students sat by the window, enjoying cups of ramen, while a few men in suits chatted at the drink section. A woman stood in front of the ice cream freezer, ensuring that the female essential needs section remained undisturbed.

'These people better be open-minded,' he thought, not wanting to draw attention if customers noticed him at the female essential section. He still wasn't used to being stared at.

As he sauntered to the section, he was relieved to find that there was no line of other customers. The shelves on both sides displayed different brands, colors, and sizes of pads, each with its own price.

He spotted a brand his sister used to ask him to buy, but he figured his female staff would prefer different brands. Scratching his head, he wondered which ones to get. He was certain about choosing the winged ones, but he was unsure about the length.

Resting a palm on the shelf while pinching his nose bridge, he pondered. Despite his thinking, he couldn't come up with an answer. He mumbled to himself, "Do all girls even experience heavy flow on their first day?" Despite his mumbling, he still had no answer. He took out his phone and decided to Google it.

He found an article on Google stating that not every girl experiences heavy flow on their first day. This only added to his hesitation. Troubled, he lightly knocked his head against the shelf.

"Excuse me, sir?" a female voice startled him. He turned around to see a girl, shorter than Jiah and possibly younger, wearing the shop's uniform—a cotton tracksuit with her hair tied in a ponytail. Her name tag read 'Kang GaEun.' The girl asked, "Is there anything I can help you with?"

"Uhm," Hoseok buzzed, feeling nervous. "I'm... I-I'm looking for coconut. Wait, no! Not coconut, but pads! For... for my women!"

GaEun stared at him, shocked. "Oh," she whispered. He felt like smacking himself for leaving out the word 'staff.' The girl seemed to have mistaken him for a playboy or a Casanova. She didn't blink as she stiffened and asked, "Are all your girlfriends on their first days?"

Hoseok pursed his lips, shutting his eyes. He knew it. Opening his eyes again, he smiled awkwardly and said, "I meant to say for my women staff."

"Oh," GaEun whispered again. "Oh! I'm sorry!" Now she was the one stuttering. "H-how, how can I h-help you?"

Awkward laughter escaped both of them, and once it subsided, Hoseok composed himself and quickly commented, "I don't know what to pick."

**********

Slowly fluttering her eyes open, she found herself in a daze for a brief moment. The buzzing sound of the warm air-conditioner accompanied her. For some unknown reason, she didn't want to get up. However, recalling that she was napping at her workplace, she pushed herself to sit up. Strangely, she felt fresh and alert. She reached for her phone beside the pillow and pressed a button to light up the screen. The lockscreen showed that it was fifteen to three in the afternoon.

Turning her head to look at the office next to hers, she noticed her boss was not at his seat. Weird, he was usually stuck at his desk even at this hour. Assuming he went to the restroom, she glanced over, and the open door confirmed it was vacant. She got up and folded the blanket, returning the bed to its sofa form.

Heading to the main area, she saw her colleagues were busy with their tasks. Jisoo and Wheein were also busy entertaining customers. That day, they seemed to have more customers than usual. She went to the pantry, but Hoseok wasn't there, nor was he anywhere on the premises. Despite her mind still being in a blank state, she asked her colleagues, "Where's Hoseok?"

They all answered inaudibly, saying that they didn't know. Namjoon chimed in, "I saw him leave with a small bag, though. Maybe he went out to get something."

"I see," she murmured.

Meanwhile, Hoseok was seen walking past the glass display and stopped at the entrance to open the door. When he saw her, he paused and said, "You're awake."

"Yeah," she replied, her attention drawn to the plastics in Hoseok's hands.

He walked to the coffee table in the middle of the room and placed two plastics down. The rest remained in his grip. "Got you guys some snacks," he told them. As expected, the other employees (except Wheein and Jisoo) came rushing to the table like hungry hyenas. It was a view she had accustomed to.

Hoseok then walked over to her and mouthed, "follow me." He continued to walk, leading the way to his office. Once inside, he rolled down all the blinds and made sure there were no gaps. He closed the door too. Placing the plastics on his table, he told her to sit down.

She sat down, pushing her chair closer to the table as she checked the contents of one of the plastics. It contained a plate of sweet and sour pork covered with thin vinyl. Surprised, she exclaimed, "what's this! We should share this with everyone."

Hoseok stammered, "no, no, no! I bought those for you."

"All of these?" she asked, gesturing in a circle around the plastics. She stood up and grabbed another plastic. "What else did you get me?" This one contained a pack of dumplings. It felt like a dream, and she couldn't believe it. "What –"

With a smug smile, Hoseok said, "I accidentally saw the notes on your notebook."

At that moment, she remembered she had written down some food recipes she was craving. "Don't tell me you bought everything I wrote!"

"No," he replied, casually shaking his head. "I only got you the sweet and sour pork, dumplings, a red bean bun, and some French fries. I couldn't find the cheese sauce for you, and I don't know a good Udon place. Sorry!" He pursed his lips. "I got you tuna kimbap as a substitute. I hope you don't mind."

"Of course not," she said. "I appreciate all these, but you didn't have to go through the trouble of getting them for me."

Snickering, Hoseok said, "you've done a lot for me. You even took care of me when I wasn't in the right mental state. Take these as a thank-you gesture from me."

Jiah looked down at the plastics. Three white plastics with a shop's logo on them caught her attention this time. "You went shopping too?" she asked.

Looking at the similar plastics, Hoseok replied, "oh right! I bought some pads."

"Pads?" Her voice rose, surprised to hear that he bought pads. She pushed the plastics aside and found two packets of maxi pads, each twenty-three centimeters long with fourteen packs in each. Touched, she slowly looked up at him and raised her thumb. "You're amazing."

Still smug, Hoseok chuckled. "I bought those for all the girls. Let Wheein and Jisoo know about it later."

"Wow," Jiah mumbled. "The girls could have fallen for you if you did this before I joined."

"Sad to know I don't have the chance now. They're dating each other. But it's okay." He turned his office chair around and said, "I have you." When the chair returned to face her, he smiled.

Jiah puckered her lips and made a face in response.

As she took out all the packs to prepare to put them on the shelf, she noticed a thick, purple wrap. She grabbed it and realized it was a big bar of Cadbury's Dark Forest. "Whose is this?" she asked, showing it to Hoseok.

His smile grew wider. "That's yours!"

Jiah displayed a knowing smile and said, "oh my, my! My boss is sweet. Now, I can see why Wendy fell for you." Mentioning the name had Hoseok's smile fade. Jiah noticed it, but she wasn't affected. She smiled softly and said, "Enough is enough, Jung Hoseok. She told me things that I know she wants you to know too. I want to tell you for her, but I don't think I have the right to do that."

Hoseok sighed, and with curiosity, he asked, "what did she tell you?"

Gesturing to zip her lips, she shook her head. But then, she added playfully, "She showed me your dancing videos, though."

His eyes widened in shock. "What?"

"Why didn't you tell me you can dance so well?" Jiah asked, jutting her bottom lip. "You were so cool!"

"It's not that. It's just that it's been a long time since I danced. I doubt my skills are still alive," he explained. "My drawing skill has improved, but my dancing skill has decreased. I see no point in telling you."

Jiah said nothing and only nodded. After taking out all the takeaways, she set the plastics aside. There were two pairs of chopsticks from two of the takeaways. She handed a pair to her boss, and he looked at her, confused. "Take it! You bought everything I wanted to eat at once. I can't finish all of this alone."

Hesitantly, Hoseok took the chopsticks. "Are you sure you can't finish all of this alone?"

She nodded. Looking at her boss, she let out a giggle and said, "Thank you, by the way." They both smiled at each other.

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