One month later.
Venice.
I hear a guttural, animal moan in my ear. No, wait. That's me. It takes me a few seconds to figure it out. I open one eye. I focus on the window and realize it's already day. I don't know how I got home last night. I don't remember much. But my head warns that it will burst, and that means I was drunk again. I feel like someone's hitting my head with a baseball bat. I think I was in a bar, and the bartender and I became great friends when I pulled out a solid amount of money and told him to pour.
I roll over on my back and stretch lazily. My whole body hurts and I feel nauseous. I get up a bit and then I notice Pa Pete sitting on a chair by the garden door reading a book.
- Did you finally wake up? - he says without looking at me, turning the page.
I get up and lean on the head of the bed. I feel terrible. The taste in my mouth sucks.
- Good Morning. - I say, but my voice comes out like an ugly grunt.
- It's 6 O'clock in the afternoon, Venice. It'll be a little dark. -there's an accusatory note in Pa Pete's voice. - But I should be glad to see you at all. It's been your daily routine lately. At night you drink until you're unconscious and make Natt pick you up from bars. And during the day, you sleep and try to sober up.
- Pa, don't exaggerate. - I say and rub my head. - I'm just a teenager living my life. I'm just like everyone else.
- You're not everyone, Venice. – Pa Pete puts the book down and looks at me. There's anger and a little disappointment in his eyes that I've never seen when he looks at me. - You're my son. That's not who you are. What's going on with you? You haven't been yourself lately. Look at you. - he screams and waves his hands at me. I'm looking around. My clothes are crumpled and one of my hands is bandaged. It was healed from the last time, but I guess I fought again yesterday. - Look what you look like, boy. You're in a terrible state. You smell like alcohol for miles. There's blood all over the floor, and your face is purple. Who are you and where is my son? - he was tired of shouting. Desperate at the view in front of him. I close my eyes for a few seconds. It's not his fault. My parents did everything they could to raise me well. It's just my way of dealing with the problem.
- Where's Rain? - he asks quietly, as if he's shooting me in the heart.The heart takes one shot, then another. Looks like it's still working. It's still there. I haven't felt it much in the last month. It was like it had stopped beating. It was like he was gone with the beautiful, damn boy. But now, at the mention of his name, the terrible pain came back with him. It goes slowly into my whole body and stops right in my chest on the left.
- It's none of your business. - I speak rudely and force myself out of bed.
- It's him, isn't it? - ask my Pa and crosses his hands. I don't pay attention to him. I take off my shirt, then my pants. - What happened to you two? Answer me.
- I'm gonna take a shower, Pa. - I'm opening the bathroom door.
- You're ruining yourself, Venice. Did you ruin him before that? he asks, and I hold myself in place. His words tear me to pieces, almost kill me.
- Fine. - I hear his voice behind me, and seconds later he's already left my room.
I go into the bathroom and lean on the sink. I look in the mirror. I look like a crumpled piece of shit. I have a lot of bruises on my face and each has a different shade of purple. One of my eyebrows is cracked, and so is my lower lip. I still remember my mother's words. Did I really do that? Did I really ruin him? I had ruined everything between us. Just to calm my conscience. Because I didn't want him to suffer when he was with me. I didn't want anyone to suffer. I thought I made the right decision. For both of us. But then why do I feel like a hole in my chest, like I've been ripped apart from the inside? Why haven't I been able to sleep for a month now, blaming myself for making a mistake? Why did I feel like I was so dependent on this guy that I didn't know who I was anymore? He had changed me to such an extent that I did not know to wonder any more at the strength of my feelings, or that such a thing had ever happened to me. But now I knew I had fallen in love with this boy. So much so that there was no escape. Pa Pete was right. I fell in love and then I ruined him.
Rain.
- Good thing that you came Sky. He's not well. He's always lying and crying.
I'm turning my head like I've been doing for the last month. Everything makes a terrible noise, my head hurts. I need peace and quiet, and I can't find it. I'm tired, I'm sleepy, I want to rest. I just want to stay in this cocoon forever. Hide from everyone and no one will ever find me again. I can't remember how long I haven't been out of bed except to go to the bathroom. I don't shower, dress or eat. I've turned off my phone and computer for a long time because I don't want anyone to bother me. I just lie in bed and cry. Ruined by the grief that takes away all my strength. I don't think I'll ever get up again.
Then I start screaming, pushing, kicking, swearing at the whole world. I curse myself for being such a fool, for being so weak that anyone can fool me. I also curse him for having my whole being in his hands and throwing it away so quickly. In a moment, he stepped on it and completely destroyed me. And now there is no comfort for me. I'm stuck in this life that has nothing to do with my life a month ago. Now I've lost everything. I never knew what happened. What had happened in those few hours that he decided to ruin everything.
They won't leave me alone. Someone pulls the blanket, but I remain curled up with my eyes closed.
- Rain. - I hear my brother's voice. The bed falls down and he sits next to me. I can feel his warm body. He puts his hand on my cheek. His cool palm soothes my hot skin. - God, you're burning up. Open your eyes. - I slowly open my eyes. The light in the room irritates them, and I blink as long as I can focus.
- What are you doing here? - I ask hoarse and groan when I try to get up. My body does not listen to me, it has no strength for anything. He helps me get up a little bit and puts the pillow behind my back.
- I haven't seen you in so long. I missed you so much. - he smiles warmly and hugs.
I don't want him to feel sorry for me. But when I think about it, that's probably what I look like. - You okay? - he asks after he lets me go. I look confused. Am I okay? Can't you tell?
- I'm fine. - I say, even though I feel so bad.
- You don't look good. Mom told me you barely eat or leave your room. You sleep all the time. How long has it been since you showered? - he asks and looks at me.
- I'm fine. - I'm saying it a little harder. – I'm fine. I just need a break. - I put my hands in my hair. I'm kicking the blanket out because it's getting in the way.
- It's been a month since you took a break. Don't you think you should go out a little bit? Change your mind.
I'm tired and I want to sleep.
I lie down again and turn my back. I pray he gives up and leaves, but that's not happening.
- Rain, what's going on? You and Venice...
- I don't want to talk about it. End of story. I'm asking you to let me sleep. - I say and close my eyes.
- But...
- Please.
My request sounded very desperate, because he just sighed and left the room. I take the blanket and wrap myself over my head, continuing to suffer. That's what I'm doomed to do for the rest of my life. A life that Venice tried to ruin. You ruined us both.
Venice.
- Are you seriously not leaving? - I ask wearily, the insolent ones who have just occupied my room.
While I was resting, the "eight dujets" stormed into my room and said they wanted to spend time with me. They sat down and talked as if I was not in the room. Paris and Flo sat on my bed, Natt and Ace brought chairs to sit on. And Archi, Peach and Cherry are sitting on pillows on the ground. Let's not forget Princess Tokyo, who decorated the room sitting in her pink armchair, which she had brought from her room. Of course, she used Paris for this job.
- We came to see a movie together. Or we could talk. It's been a while. - Archi says and looks at me with a smile.
Natt reaches over and takes the TV remote.
- What to let go of? Some horror? - he offers and turns on the TV.
- Great idea. - Paris is jumping with enthusiasm. - I know a new one. I bet you haven't seen it.
- Not horror again. - Cherry protested. - I won't be able to sleep again.
- Are you scared? - it's Tokyo.
- Sure. We're not all heartless like you, ice queen. - says Cherry, and she makes fun of her.
Tokyo just shrugs.
- So you came to look after me. Did Pa Pete send you? - I ask, looking at Natt. He must know something. When he looks away, I roll my eyes.
- Yes. - Paris admits it without shame. At least he's gutted. Flo gains a little weight and looks at him bloodily, and he just shrugs.
I look at my sister. She's lying on the bed next to me, but she hasn't said a word to me since she got here. After what happened, I can feel her slowly moving away from me. Apparently, a stranger is more important than her own brother. If you only knew...
- Girls love romantic movies. - Peach said thoughtfully.
- How do you know? You've become very knowledgeable on this subject. - I'm annoying him.
- Not as good as you, bro. You and Rain have seen a lot of romantic movies, haven't you? - he asks, and there is silence in the room. Everyone looks at each other, and Cherry hits her brother.
- You're such a dick. - hit him on the head with a pillow.
- Whatever. Come on, leave now. - I'm trying to get them out.
- Why don't we do something like "1,000 weddings"? I have to get ready, though. Sky keeps telling me I have to watch at least ten movies to know what a wedding is. When I proposed to him, I didn't think it would be so hard. - Natt complains.
- I told you. - I remind him, pointing at him. - But you didn't listen to me. "I love him, I will marry him." - I'm imitating him.
- I thought you'd back me up. I didn't expect that from you. - he crosses his arms in front of his chest and pouts.
- Should we release "Runaway Bride"? You never know what's gonna happen. You have to be prepared for anything. - Ace proposes to his brother, and Natt throws a pillow at him.
- Be careful I don't chase you. I got you a call for Dean anyway. Don't give it back to you. - he says it angrily and hits him again.
All this noise makes my head ache. They begin to fight and there is a commotion in the room. There's a pillow fight that involves me. While I'm trying to woo Natt, Peach is pulling his sister's hair. Paris bites me on the arm, and Flo and Archi start hitting him with a pillow. Ace throws popcorn everywhere and pushes the can of Coca-Cola for luxury. Only Tokyo sits back and watches the show. She doesn't do that sort of thing.
- You're terrible. Sometimes I don't know why I know you.
All of a sudden everyone looks at me and attacks me.
- You don't choose your family, unfortunately. - Paris says as he hits me with a pillow.
- Stop it, I'm the oldest. I'll beat you all up. - I'm screaming as I try to get out.
- When you're the oldest, you teach the little ones to drink and fight? - Natt's trying to strangle me with the blanket. He wraps it around my head and squeezes. - Oh, don't hit me, little girl. - he groans when he gets a fist from Flo. That's it, my girl.
- I'm a girl. - she says, and plucks it by the hair. – You can't hit me. - she hissed a moment before Peach hit her with a pillow.
- Here I am. - he laughs, but the girls attack him.
- YOU'RE CRAZY.
Suddenly, Sky enters the room.
- Good of you to come. It's like a zoo in here. - says Tokyo and hides behind Sky. But he doesn't seem to care. He looks at me with a fierce look, and if he could only look at me, I'd be dead by now. Natt slips out of bed and approaches him with a smile.
- Hi baby. Look what these did to me...
- We need to talk. - he says through his teeth and passes. He stands by the window with his back to me.
Natt looks at me silently, and I just nod.
- All right, guys. We had a good time, but everything has an end. Let's all go to bed, and we'll clean this up. - he says, and one by one they all get up.
- Can we help? - Peach suggests, looking at me and at Natt. He was obviously curious.
- We can handle it. You guys go to bed.
- But...
- Come on.
After Natt manages to get the children out, he closes the door and leans on it.
- What a day. - he forgives by rubbing his hand on his shoulder. – I think I broke a vertebra.
- What's going on? - I ask, looking at Sky's back.
I take off the blanket and sit on the edge of the bed. My bare feet touch the floor. Sky turns around and leans against the glass.
- You tell me. What's going on, Venice? - nods to my hand, then looks at my face. - What's going on?
I look at Natt. He seems a little worried.
- Nothing special. I just had a little too much alcohol last night. You know.
- I know. - Sky says and looks at his fiance. - I know very well. And?
- And nothing. What are these interrogations, Sky? If you have something to say, say it. Stop talking in nonesence.
- You are just like him. - Sky moistens his lips and then looks at me. - I was home. Mom called me because she was so worried.
Oh, no.
- And? What does that have to do with me?
- There is. It's about the Rain. - he says and approaches me. I flinch at the mention of his name, and I think Sky and Natt notice it.
- Sky. - Natt says preemptively. But Sky keeps going.
- My brother's not well. He hasn't been out of the house for a month. He sleeps all the time, barely eats. He won't talk to anyone. He doesn't want to see anyone. He hasn't been himself since you two broke up. - he says, and his voice breaks. He's gonna cry any minute. - You're not well either. What's going on, Venice? What did you do to my brother?
- Its none of your business. I have to take a shower. - I get up and go to the bathroom. Sky's stopping me.
- Don't run like a coward, Venice. It's all your fault. You loved each other, didn't you? What happened? - he's hitting me in the chest.
- Sky, stop. You don't know anything. - I tell him, and I try to back off. The anger in me is slowly rising.
- Sky, let him go. - Natt grabs his hands, but Sky pulls away.
- Then tell me. Explain it to me. My brother's like a walking ghost, Venice. What did you do to him? Tell me. - he's starting to scream. The veins on his neck protrude. He's pushing me back. - He quit, Venice. He left everything for you. How could you do that, Venice? - his tears are running down his cheeks.
I'm suffering too, don't you see? Can't you see I'm in pain too? Why does it always have to be my fault? He keeps hitting me in the chest with his fists. Natt's trying to stop him.
- Sky, stop. He's not well either. Stop it. - screaming and trying to grab his hands.
- What did you do to him, you prick? What? What?
- Enought. - I scream and in a fit of rage I take the glass from the nightstand and smash it against the wall. The glass shatters everywhere. Natt hugs Sky, and he screams in horror.
- STOP IT. YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING! - I'm screaming mad with rage. - YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING. You don't know. – I throw the sheets on the ground, I push the night lamp. I'm starting to kick the nightstand. - GET OUT. - I scream and push them to the door. That's where Pa Vegas and Pa Pete come in. - Get out. Leave me alone. GET OUT OF HERE. - I throw everyone out of my room and close the door.
- Venice. Open up. You hear me? Open up. - Pa Vegas is screaming and knocking on the door.
I'm sick of it. I'm tired of everyone blaming me. It's not my fault. I'm not the only one to blame. He's guilty, too. He should have told me. Tell me sooner. Why have you been hiding for so long? Why is he in pain now? Why is he pretending to hurt? That's what he wanted. He didn't want to be with me from the beginning. Why is he hurt now? Why am I so hurt?
I'm breathing hard. My hands are white from squeezing. The white bandage again has red spots. Shit, I'm sick of it.
The screams from outside continue. I can't listen to them. I don't want to hear them. My head is going to explode. I take off my pajamas and put on a T-shirt and pants. The first ones I saw in the closet. I put my shoes on and get the key and helmet for my bike. I walk out the door that leads to the garden. Fortunately, no one can see me. I get my bike out of the garage and I get on it. I light it and go into the night among millions of tiny lights.
Hello beautiful people. I'm back. I know I lied to you, but today I wanted to write. And make you happy. So. Here's the head. If you've cried on the previous one here, also prepare your tissues. That's the situation for now. Good night, read, comment, vote and love each other. I love you. Bye Angels.