Long chapter ~ Hope you enjoy!!
-Wes-
When Alyx pulls down my street, I can see my dad's car parked outside. I guess he's back.
"I'll see you later," I mumble to Alyx after he pulls into my driveway. I climb out and walk to the front door stepping inside. I find both Mom and Dad in the kitchen talking to each other.
"Wesley," Dad says, coming closer to me. His dark hair looks like it's gotten grayer over the past two weeks. It wouldn't surprise me with how much he works. I can tell he's exhausted with the bags under his eyes.
"Hey, Dad."
"How have you been?"
"I'm good."
"Your mom told me you and Claire split." Ugh... Of course she did.
"Yeah..." I trail off. Conversations are always awkward with my dad. It's like I'm always just catching him up with what has happened. We never just live in the moment.
"Well, that's sad to hear. She was a good girl." I chew on the inside of my cheek to avoid scoffing.
"He's partnered up with a pretty girl for a class project," Mom says. "She was here over the weekend."
"Mom, Emma is just my partner. It's not like that," I tell her.
"Okay, okay. By the way, why was your car here when I got home?"
"I got a ride today."
"With Alyx?" I go to answer 'yes', but she cuts me off before I can. "Or Ryland?"
"Who's Ryland?" Dad asks, making me mentally sigh.
"He's a new friend Wesley made. He was over this weekend, too. He's such a gentleman. He helped Wesley with a flat tire."
"Well, that was nice of him," Dad responds.
I have to stop myself from rolling my eyes at their praise for him. I bet they wouldn't think he's such a great guy if they knew what he's doing with their son. God, I don't think I could ever tell them. They've never showed homophobic tendencies either, but I'm not telling them shit. I mean, they're my parents. They could disown me if they wanted to. I'm not really close with Dad, but I love my mom. It'd kill me if she hated me for it.
My father looks at me. "I'll get you a new tire before I have to leave out again. You shouldn't ride on a spare for long."
"Okay. Thanks," I mumble.
"I'm going to go wash up, honey," he tells Mom and kisses her on the cheek.
"Alright. I'm starting dinner soon." He nods before leaving us alone in the kitchen. "You want to go wash up, too?" Mom asks me.
I nod and disappear to my room. Instead of showering, I just strip out of my school clothes and put on some comfortable ones. I lay down and tap on my phone to get the screen to light up. I see a text from Ryland sent two minutes ago.
'Hey. Did you make it home?'
I halfway feel like ignoring him, but I'm also a little bored. Fuck it.
'I did.'
'That's good. Did you have a good day?'
'I did.'
'Did you work with Emma again?' Though it's a simple question, his jealously is evident.
'I did.' I repeat for the third time. Before he starts to think I'm a dry texter, I send another message. 'How was your day?'
'It was good. I got to see you first thing, so I've been in a great mood all day. I wish I could've picked you up, though.'
I roll my eyes at his flirtatious text. Instead of responding to it, I decide to tell him about what happened today.
'Your best friend got in a fight today.'
'Maya?'
'Yeah. She beat up some girl for kissing Alyx.'
'Damn. Maya hasn't had a boyfriend since she was fourteen, and she's always been temperamental. So her going into a jealous rage doesn't surprise me.' Before I can respond, he sends another. 'Could I call you? I prefer it over texting, but it's up to you.'
Since he's been so considerate with me, I decide to give in to his request. 'Sure.'
His phone call pops up almost instantly. I hit the green button and bring the phone up to my ear after rolling onto my stomach.
"I expected you to say 'no'," he says, his deep voice filling my ears.
"Well, this is easier than texting."
"Is it?" he asks in his teasing tone. Asshole knows the effect he has on me, and it's annoying.
"Takes less energy." I don't have to type or read anything this way.
"Do I drain your energy? Because I can do that another wa-"
"Okay, I'm hanging up."
"Wait, don't. I'm sorry. What were we saying? Oh, yeah. How Maya got in a fight."
"Yeah, she really fucked that girl up."
"Well, can you really blame her?"
"Would you have done the same thing?" I ask curiously.
"Depends."
"On?"
"If it was against your will and they knew you were taken." Why is he saying 'you' like I'm his boyfriend? Also, he'd beat somebody up for me? I don't know why that surprises me. He did try to block me the last time I was almost hit. So if he's willing to take a punch, I'm sure he doesn't mind throwing one.
"I think that's what happened. And her and Alyx aren't secretive with their relationship at school, so the girl had to know."
"Okay then. She had it coming. You don't touch someone else's lover. That's fucked up." I mean, it is fucked up. He's not wrong. "I don't have to ask if you'd do it for me because I already know you would."
I have to stop myself from scoffing. "What makes you say that?"
"Since you punched Luke in my honor."
"I told you it-"
"Yeah, yeah. It wasn't for me." I can picture his eye roll now. "So, what are you doing?"
"I'm supposed to be washing up for dinner, but I'm lying in bed talking to you."
"Well, I'm glad you chose me over showering."
"I was just feeling lazy right now. Plus, I'm trying to mentally prepare for it."
"The shower or dinner?"
"Dinner."
"Why's that?"
"My dad is back."
"Oh. Is that a good or bad thing? I know you mentioned not being close with him."
"It's... not a bad thing. I'm cool with my dad, but it's just awkward with him. We don't have anything in common, either." I wonder if Ryland was close with his dad. "Were you- Uh... Never mind." I can't just ask that. He told me his dad used to come home drunk, screaming. I doubt they were close.
"What is it? You can't just say that around me. I like knowing what's on your mind."
"It's not my business."
"Wes, I want you to get to know me. You can ask me anything. If I don't feel comfortable answering, then I'll tell you that. I'm not going to get mad at you, though."
"It was about your dad..."
"Okay."
"Were you close with him at all? Before..." I trail off.
"Yeah. Until I was about nine or ten. He was only a dick for about a year, so I didn't have to see him like that for long."
I instantly get hit with sympathy. "I'm sorry," leaves my lips before I can stop it.
"It's okay. He made his choices. That's all people can do."
That's so sad, though. I bet Ryland feels like his parents abandoned him. His dad chose drugs, resulted in him leaving Ryland. His mom made her choice, again resulting in Ryland being left behind. Does he have anyone in his life besides Amaya? For some reason, a nagging feeling in my gut wants me to tell him I won't leave him, but I push it away. That would be weird to say when we're not even dating. Maybe we should...
"Ryland."
"Yes?"
"If you still want to... we could go on that date." The date he described before did sound fun, so why not? Maybe it will help me make a decision about my sexuality.
It sounds like he chokes on something. "Wait, are you serious?"
"Yeah."
"Why did you change your mind all of sudden?" Before I can answer, he says in a monotone voice, "It's because you pity me, isn't it?"
"No! I mean, I hate that you had to go through that, but I'm not agreeing to go because I feel bad for you." He lets a hum out. I don't think he believes me. I sharply exhale through my nose. I hate when people don't believe me when I'm being honest. "If you want the truth, I think I like you." What am I doing? I didn't expect to confess. I wasn't even sure of my feelings, yet. I thought...
Who am I kidding? The only thing I'm confused about is him being a boy. I like him as a person, though. A lot.
I take a deep breath before I continue. "I think," I say, despite my current thoughts. "I mean, I like being around you and talking to you. And kissing you isn't so bad. I also felt pretty shitty earlier when I thought about a girl. And after that video I watched, I did get har-" I cut myself off, realizing what the fuck I'm saying. Oh my god. Talk about word vomit.
"What was that?"
"Nothing. I got to go." I hang up before he can get another word in. Did I forget who I was talking to or something? Wait, why would I tell anyone that?! Was I just feeling comfortable and rambling? That can't be it. I'm always hyperaware around Ryland. Is it because he's not physically here? God, I don't know, but I really hope he didn't catch what I was saying.
My phone buzzes, telling me I have a message. I almost don't want to read it, but I look down to see what it says.
'I don't know what you were saying near the end, but I'm so happy to hear that you like me.' Relief washes over me that he didn't understand. He'd tease me for days.
'I said I think I do. I might just still be confused.' Look at me trying to back out now. Of course. I mentally roll my eyes at myself.
'Well, until you're sure, can I selfishly ask you something?'
'What?'
'Don't hook up with a girl until you make a decision about me.'
'Whatever. But why?'
'I can't stand the thought of someone touching you like that. Plus, it'd just be a waste of your time.'
I try ignoring the first part, but it's hard with how hot my cheeks burn. I take a deep breath and only respond to the second half.
'Why would it be a waste?'
'Because they couldn't make you feel as good as I could.'
My face flushes even harder reading his message. What the fuck? I widen my eyes and look down. What the fuck?! No! I try to think of something gross or sad, but it doesn't stop the blood from flowing south. God damn it! It's only because I'm sexually frustrated. Not because of him!
He sends another text. 'Let me know when you're ready for that date.' He even threw in a winky face at the end.
Instead of responding, I leave my phone on the bed and go to take a cold shower before this awkward dinner with my parents.
~
"So, are you enjoying your classes this semester?" Dad asks during dinner. "It's your last one."
"Yeah. It's been pretty easy so far. Not a lot of homework but it's only been a week."
"Well, that's good. How's Alyx been?"
"Good."
"That's good. You have any classes with him?"
"Yeah, just Biology."
"What about this Ryland?" I really wish Mom wouldn't have brought him up.
"He's already graduated, honey," Mom answers before I can.
"Ah, okay. Well, you should bring him by here sometime this week. This is the first new friend of yours I've heard about since Alyx. I'd love to meet him." God fucking damn it! That's the last thing I want to do. He's not even technically a 'friend'.
"Are you home for the week?" Mom asks him.
"Yes. I have to leave Friday morning, though."
Mom gives him a sad smile. "Well, I'm off Thursday, so I can bake a ham or something. Wes, why don't you invite him over Thursday night for dinner?"
I dryly swallow. "Yeah, sure."
"Invite Alyx, too," Dad says. "It's been a while since I've seen him."
There's no way I'm having Alyx, Ryland, and my parents all in one room. Hell no. "I don't think Alyx will be able to. We're working on that project right now, so he might be busy."
"Well, alright. Tell him I hope he's doing well."
"Okay," I say before forcing another bite of food into my mouth. I can't believe I have to invite Ryland over for dinner now. Or maybe I don't. I just won't tell him about it and then tell my parents that he can't come.
~
The week went by faster than I was hoping, and Thursday morning comes around. I plan on telling my parents after school that Ryland can't come. I, of course, didn't tell him. I haven't even talked to him at all since Monday. Since I got hard again... God, I really need to try to clear my mind and get some sort of relief. Waking up hard every morning is getting on my nerves. It's not even like normal morning wood. It hurts with how hard it will be. It's really getting annoying.
I slightly jump at the sound of knocking on the door. "Hey, you up?" Dad asks.
"Yeah." I climb out of bed and open the door.
"I'm going to give you a ride to and from school today."
I furrow my brows. "That's okay, Dad."
"I was going to take your car to get serviced later today and get you that new tire. I was wanting to do it earlier this week, but you were already gone the past two days before I was awake."
"Okay," I mutter, already dreading this ride. "Let me get dressed."
"Alright. I'll be in the kitchen."
I throw on a red loose shirt and some black jeans. I slip a green hoodie over my head before sliding some sneakers on. I use the bathroom and finish getting ready before meeting Dad in the kitchen.
"You ready?"
"Yeah."
I follow him out to his car and climb in. He tries making small talk, which I was expecting, but I was hoping for silence.
"Have you made any plans for college?"
"No, not yet." I'm not even sure if I want to go. I haven't really thought about what I want to do with my life.
"Alright. What time do you need to be at school?"
"I still have twenty minutes before first period starts."
"I'm going to stop at this store then." He stops at the gas station I pass every day. "Do you want anything from inside?"
"No, I'm good."
"I'll be right back." He climbs out and shuts the door behind him.
I let a yawn out and flip down his visor to check my appearance in the small mirror. I look tired. I rub my eyes some before leaning back in the seat.
Dad climbs back in with a paper cup in hand. "I hope their coffee is good."
I shrug. "I don't know. I never get it."
The rest of the trip is silent until he pulls up outside of the school. "I'll be here later to pick you up."
"Okay. Bye, Dad," I say, opening the door.
He yells to have a good day before I shut it. I roll my eyes, knowing I won't. For some reason, I feel bad. Like I'm guilty or something. I brush the feeling off and head to class.
~
During lunch, I could barely eat anything due to the annoying feeling in my gut. It only takes one 'hey' text from Ryland to make me realize why I feel like this. I should've invited him. I still could. I'm not doing it, though. I don't care. Having him over to play video games is different than having him sit down for a family dinner. Inviting him to dinner like that feels too weird. Too intimate. Like I'm introducing him to my family as the person I'm dating.
Never replying to his message earlier, he texts me again in seventh period.
'What are you doing today? I'm not doing anything, and if you're also not doing anything, I think we should do something together. You did agree to have that date with me. Sooo, if you're not busy...'
'I can't today.' I reply, keeping my phone in my lap and out of sight.
'Why not? Have better plans?'
'Not exactly. Having dinner with my parents tonight.'
'Oh... That sucks. Well, I'd come and keep you company if I could.'
The guilt almost prevents my thumbs from typing the lie. 'Sorry. Family dinner.'
'I understand. You don't have to be sorry. Let's hang out this weekend then.' Yes, I do have to be sorry.
Instead of responding, I lock my phone and ask to go to the bathroom since I start to feel a little nauseous. Once in there, I get another text expecting it to be Ryland, but it's Dad.
'Do you think you could get a ride? Your car is fixed and home, but my boss is holding a virtual meeting in twenty minutes. I don't know when I can get there, and your mom's busy cooking.'
'Yeah, sure.' I roll my eyes.
'That's good. I'm sorry. Ask Ryland for a ride since he's already coming over for dinner anyway.'
Looks like I'm walking. I can't ask him now and have to explain that I lied to him about his invitation. Maybe I could ask Alyx for another ride. He did ask me earlier today if I wanted to go to the gym, but I turned him down.
I take a deep breath and splash some water on my face before going back to class. I hope the uneasiness in my stomach will go away soon. I don't like it.
~
I was hoping to catch Alyx in the parking lot before he left that way I could ask in person instead of texting, but I see his car pulling out of the parking lot as soon as I get outside. Great. Instead of calling him, I settle on walking. I haven't been to the gym this week, so this can be my exercise.
After only about two minutes of walking, I hear the sound of a vehicle slowing behind me, and a short honk makes me turn to see who it is. I swallow hard at the familiar black truck and the handsome boy behind the wheel. Shit. Why?!
"Hey. Why are you walking?" he asks, his head slightly sticking out of the window.
"My dad gave me a ride this morning, so he could take my car to get serviced and shit. But he couldn't pick me up."
"Oh. Well, get in. I'll take you home."
"It's okay. I'm sure since you're out driving, you have some plans now."
"No, I was just out for a drive. I can give you a ride."
I take a deep breath and start walking to the passenger side of his truck. I know he's not going to let me walk anyway, so I don't even try to fight it. I'll just make him drop me out before he gets to my house.
"Thanks," I mumble once inside.
"No problem." He pulls off and drives toward my house. "How have you been this week? I haven't heard from you much."
"Fine."
"That's good. Are you finished with that project?"
"Yeah." I ended up skipping P.E. yesterday to join Emma in her Studyhall, so we could work on the model. All that we need to finish is filling out the poster board, but Emma offered to finish decorating it on her own. She said my handwriting was shitty anyway, so she didn't mind. The insult didn't bother me. She's right. It's definitely not the neatest.
"That's good," he repeats. I really don't know how he's into me. I barely talk to him, and when I do, I give the driest responses. "So, you got your car serviced?"
"Yeah. My dad wanted to get it checked and get me a new tire."
"Well, that was nice of him. There wasn't anything else wrong with it, right?"
"I guess not. He told me it was home and fixed up."
"I'm glad it's taken care of. I've been a little worried this week knowing you were driving on that spare."
Silence settles around us since I'm too busy panicking to respond. He was worried about me? I hope he can't hear how fast my heart is beating.
I feel my phone buzz, making me pull it out of my pocket. It's Dad asking if I got a ride. I send a quick 'yeah' and set my phone on the seat beside my leg.
"So, how long is your dad going to be in town?"
"He leaves tomorrow morning."
"Ah. So, that means you're not busy tomorrow night, right?"
"No," I answer before I realize where he's heading with this.
"Sooo," he drags out. "Do you want to hang out?"
"N-"
He cuts me off. "Saying 'no' will just confuse me after what you told me Monday."
"Maybe. I don't know." I see we're almost to my road. "You can drop me out at this stop sign."
"What? I can just take you to the driveway. You don't have to walk the rest of the way."
As soon as he stops at the sign, I say, "It's fine." I quickly push open the door and climb out.
"Wes! Wait!"
I close his door and give him a small wave and an apologetic smile. I just didn't want to risk my parents coming out to greet him or anything. How awkward would it be to get caught up in this lie.
I walk up my porch and step inside the warm house. Damn, it smells great in here.
"Wesley! Is that you?" Mom yells from the kitchen.
I join her in there and get engulfed in the smell of food. "Yeah."
"Dinner won't be too long from now. When is Ryland going to be here? I thought he was going to give you a ride."
"Son, I'm sorry I wasn't able to pick you up," Dad says, coming into the kitchen. I guess his meeting just ended.
"It's fine."
"Where's Ryland?" he asks with raised eyebrows.
"Uh, well, Ryland isn't going to make it. He had something come up."
Mom's face slightly falls. "Aw. Well, alright. We can still enjoy this dinner as a family."
"I was looking forward to meeting him," Dad says. "Invite him again next time I'm home."
I nod, feeling the guilty feeling return. Would inviting him really have been that bad? Yes. I feel guilty, but I don't think I did the wrong thing necessarily. Plus, it's just food. It's not that big of a deal. He can come some other time.
"Well, I'll yell for you when dinner is done," Mom tells me. "It'll probably be an hour."
"I'm going to take a shower then." I leave them behind and slip into my room. I toss my wallet onto my dresser and kick my shoes off before grabbing a change of clothes. A pair of gray sweatpants and a black T-shirt.
I don't take long in the shower. I finish rinsing the soap off before drying off and getting dressed. I walk back to my room and grab some socks. I take a seat on my bed and pull them onto my feet. I guess I'll play on my phone until dinner is done. I look around on my bed. Where's my phone? I look on my nightstand and on top of my dresser by my wallet, but I don't see it anywhere. Shit. Did I have it on me when I came inside?
I go back into the bathroom and check the pockets on my jeans. Empty. I remember using it last in his truck. Shit. Did I leave it in there? Damn it. I don't have any way to tell him either.
A knock on the front door makes my stomach drop. No, no, no! I rush out of the bathroom to the front door, but Dad already beat me to it, pulling it open. Ryland is standing there, and I can see my phone clenched in his hand. Fuck!
"You must be Ryland," Dad says and holds his hand out. Ryland instantly reaches forward and shakes it. "Wes said you wouldn't be able to make it. I'm so glad you changed your mind and accepted our invitation for dinner."
I notice the slight waver in his eyebrows. He's confused. And now he looks like he's realizing. Shit. He's going to be pissed. He blinks twice before saying, "Oh, yes. I was going to help a friend out with something, but they ended up not needing me. I hope the offer still stands."
"Of course. Come on in. I hope you're hungry. My wife's made a delicious baked ham with plenty of sides."
"Yeah, I'm starving," Ryland replies, stepping inside. Dad closes the door and heads back to the kitchen, leaving us alone by the door. When I look back at Ryland, he's giving me a 'what the hell' look.
I quickly explain in a rushed whisper, "I was supposed to invite you to dinner but didn't. But please keep acting like I did."
"You're an ass," he says with a glare. He grabs my wrist and puts my phone in my hand. "You left this in my truck." He rolls his eyes before passing me to go to the kitchen.
The insult slightly hurts. I didn't mean to upset him. I just didn't want to deal with this dinner. I don't want my parents finding out anything. And having him here risks that.
"Ryland," I hear Mom say cheerfully. "I'm glad you could come. How are you?"
"I'm doing good. How about you?"
I swallow down the lump that settled in my throat and join them in the kitchen.
~
"How is everything?" Mom asks.
"It's really good. It's been a while since I've ate a home cooked meal."
I look up at Mom, and I can see she wants to ask about his parents but doesn't. "Thank you. If you want, you can take a plate home."
"That'd be great. Thanks."
"So, how did you and Wesley meet?" Dad asks. I mentally cringe. This is why I didn't want him to come. It's like he's my date, and they're trying to get to know him before allowing us to be together.
"Through Alyx. He introduced us."
"How did you meet Alyx?"
"Oh, through his girlfriend. I'm friends with her."
"Ah. I haven't met his girlfriend. You know her, right, Son?"
I look up to see everyone's eyes on me. "Yeah. I go to school with her."
"Well, what about you, Ryland? Do you have a girlfriend?"
I widen my eyes at the question and quickly make eye contact with Ryland. Please don't tell them you're gay. Please.
"No. I'm single right now," he answers.
"So is Wesley now." I furrow my brows. What the hell is he trying to do? Play matchmaker? "He was dating this girl named Claire, but I was informed earlier this week that they broke up." One, I don't like how he's talking like I'm not even here, and two, why is he airing my business out like this? I mean, Ryland already knows but still. "She was a really sweet girl." I ball my hands into fists. It's so annoying hearing praises about her when I know the truth.
"Yeah. I really liked her, too," Mom says before taking a sip of her drink.
"Are you not going to try to work it out with her, Wesley? What even happened between you two?"
"Uh," I clear my throat. "The long distance thing wasn't working out." I don't know why I continue to lie about it. It just seems easier than telling my parents she fucked other people before me and lied about it.
"Well, you only have a semester of school left. Maybe you could give it another shot afterwards." I don't want to. I loved her once, but she's already out of my mind and heart. I sneak a peek at Ryland again. Someone else is already trying to fill that spot. "I honestly thought you two would get married." I have to stop my eyes from rolling. Aright, I'm done listening to this bullshit.
"Is it okay if I go hang out at Ryland's for a little bit?" I suddenly asks. Ryland catches my eyes with a confused glint in his. What? He shouldn't mind. This is what he wanted earlier. To hang out.
Mom hesitates, but I know she won't say 'no'. Not in front of Ryland anyway. It's like when I was a kid, and I'd make Alyx ask her if I could stay the night with him because she wouldn't say no to him.
"Uh, yeah. That's fine. But it's a school night, so don't stay out too late."
"Okay." I shovel the last bit of food on my plate into my mouth. I swallow it down before looking at Ryland to see his plate empty, too. "You ready?"
"Uhhh, yeah."
I stand up and grab both our plates, setting them in the sink. "I need to put some shoes on, and I'll be ready," I tell Ryland before leaving him in the kitchen. Maybe my parents won't bombard him with questions in the thirty seconds I'm gone.
I slip my shoes on my feet once I'm in my room, and I even grab my cologne and spray some. I swipe some deodorant on as well before brushing through my damp hair. Trying too hard, Wes. I shake the thought away, remembering how I've been fresh out of the gym most of the times I saw him, so I should definitely smell good this time.
I return to the kitchen to see Ryland now standing in the kitchen. "You ready?" I ask once I'm by his side.
"Yeah. Uh, thanks again for dinner," he says, looking at Mom before drifting his gaze to my dad. "It was nice to meet you, Sir."
"Likewise. I hope you can have dinner with us again next time I'm home from work."
"That'd be great."
"Here's your plate," Mom says, handing him a plate of food covered with foil.
"Thank you. I'll return the plate to Wes."
"Okay," she says with a smile.
"Are you riding with him or driving yourself?" Dad asks me.
Since I don't know how this 'hang out' is going to go, especially since he's mad at me, and I don't want to have to do the awkward car ride twice, I'm definitely not riding with him.
"I'll drive myself."
"Alright. Your keys are on the hook by the door. Like your mother said, don't be out too late."
"Okay," I say before nodding for Ryland to follow me. I grab my keys off the hook and step outside with him right behind me. As soon as the door shuts, he lets a huff out, but I ignore him, walking toward my car.
"Are you serious?" he says. I can hear his footsteps, following behind me.
"What?" I ask, not turning around.
"What makes you think I want you to come over?"
"Because you wanted to hang out earlier today. Plus, it's not like you'd turn down the chance to see me longer."
He lets a scoff out. "Look who's getting cocky."
I turn around and lift my eyebrows. "Am I wrong?"
His jaw noticeably clenches, and he lets a deep breath out. "Fine. Come," he says, walking past me to his truck. He opens the door and sets his plate inside before turning to face me. He crosses his arms and shrugs his shoulders. "But don't be surprised at what might happen there."
My jaw slightly drops. "Is that a threat?"
"Depends if you consider pleasure threatening." (A/N- This is just a joke Ryland makes to tease Wes. We all know, including Wes himself, that Ryland would never do anything to Wes without his consent.)
My jaw drops even more. Even though I know he's most likely teasing me, I say, "I don't want to come anymore." A little voice in the back of my head is screaming 'Yes, you do! In more ways than one!'
"No. You're coming. What would you tell your parents? You just going to lie to them some more like you did earlier about me being too busy for dinner? Like you lied to me by not even inviting me?" He takes a step closer, making me nervous. I glance at the house to make sure my parents aren't watching before returning my gaze to his. "I even offered to come, but you lied even more by telling me I wasn't invited." A feeling of guilt and shame washes over me, making a lump form in my throat. I don't like how he's making me feel like this. I already felt shitty enough.
"I'm sorry."
"You're sorry you got caught. I wouldn't have even known if you didn't leave your phone."
"No, I already felt bad. It wasn't anything against you. I just didn't want to have dinner. I didn't want anything to come up that would..."
"I wasn't go to say anything that would've outed you, Wes. I'm not an ass."
"You didn't have to call me that earlier," I mumble.
"What? Did it hurt your feelings?" I drop my eyes, feeling even worse. Because yes, it did, but I deserved it. "Because you hurt mine, too."
"I'm sorry. I really am." I can't stop my bottom lip from trembling. Damn it, I'm never emotional, but the past few weeks make me feel like that's changed.
"Why do you even want to come over? Because you feel bad?"
"No. If you want the truth, my parents were bugging me with the Claire shit, and I wanted to get away from them for a little bit. And you're who I wanted to get away from them with. Plus, you wanted to hang out earlier today, so I thought you'd be okay with it."
He takes another step closer, almost closing the small gap between us. "You know, Wes... I really like you, but you also really get on my nerves with your back and forth shit."
"What do you want me to do?" I ask in a low tone.
"I want you to make up your mind. But I understand why that's hard for you, so that's why I'm trying to be patient and give you time. You're not making it easy, though. Because you won't even try. You'll kiss me, you'll tell me you think you like me, and then you'll ignore me. You barely get into a conversation with me, and it's starting to make me feel like you're not into me. That maybe you're just attracted to me, but you don't actually like me. I don't know."
"No, that's-" I reach forward and grab his wrist. "It's not just that."
"Then what is it?"
"I told you already," I say, not wanting to repeat it to his face.
"So, what are you really wanting to do? Are you wanting to come over to get away from your parents or to spend time with me?" I hesitate, embarrassed to tell him the latter. "Say it," he demands.
"Both. Now can we please go before we get caught?"
"We're not even doing anything." No, but with how close he is, it's definitely suspicious.
"Can I come over or not?" I ask in a quiet voice. I'm already doubting his answer. I don't think he wants me to, and I don't blame him. "I said I was sorry. I really mean it."
"You're lucky you're cute." He walks back to his truck and climbs in. "Come on then."
I blink a few times, surprised he's letting me. "Uh, okay."
I pull my door open and sit in my car. I'm instantly hit with anxiety. What am I doing? I was practically begging to come over, and now I don't even want to start my car and follow him. I can't back out now, but what's going to happen when we get there? He already said something suggestive, and I don't really trust my body at the moment. It's been too long since I've done anything, and I can't guarantee nothing will happen while I'm with him. Especially if we kiss like last time.
Problem solved. I just won't let him near me.
A/N- What do we think of Wes's dad??
Wes fucked up during this chapter... Who else is mad at him for hurting Ryland again?
What do you think is going to happen next chapter?? We all know Wes doesn't really do well with his 'plans' to keep his distance while with Ry... Any guesses on what might happen? (Hint: next chapter might possibly be mature...) Might!! I haven't decided yet.
Anyway, Happy Pride Month!!! I meant to say it last update. Hope everyone is having a good month!!