.001 | c o m f o r t
At first, it's impossible for Cairo to sleep through Gavreel's snoring, but as the days pass and their time together grows shorter, he starts to wonder just how much he'd miss the sound when he leaves.
.002 | k i s s
Every night, Cairo kisses Gavreel's face on the pillow before falling asleep, hoping that Gavreel will join him in his dreams.
.003 | s o f t
"Uy, kailan ka naman naging softie?" asks Pearl with a teasing look, and Gavreel turns away with a laugh because he never thought he would fall this hard for Cairo, fall this hard for anyone over a silly game.
.004 | p a i n
Gavreel wipes his tears and opens another bottle, drinking until the room's spinning because it's the only way he can forget the anger in Cairo's eyes, the sharpness in his voice, the sound of his own heart breaking into a million pieces.
.005 | p o t a t o e s
It takes Cairo two minutes to peel one small potato and Gavreel, having watched for what seems like an eternity, takes the peeler and pouts in playful frustration, "Ako na nga lang, baby, napakabagal mo naman kasi, eh!"
.006 | r a i n
Cairo wonders if the world can feel what he's feeling as he watches the rain falling on the window, doubt creeping into his chest if they can speak again without fighting, if they can ever move on without going around in circles.
.007 | c h o c o l a t e
Gavreel always complains that Cairo eats too much junk food, but he sends him a box of chocolates anyway just to see him smile.
.008 | h a p p i n e s s
"Alam mo, baby, I'm glad na naging gamer ako," Gavreel says, his hand running through Cairo's hair, and when Cairo looks up at him, he wants to say everything running through his mind – how this is the happiest he's ever been in his entire life, how sad he is that they're only together on borrowed time, how he's so scared of losing Cairo, it's almost too much to bear – but he settles with a kiss on Cairo's forehead and continues, "Kasi nakilala kita."
.009 | t e l e p h o n e
Even though Gavreel knows that Cairo won't answer him back, this is all he can do to show Cairo that he's always there for him, and he takes a deep breath before turning on his camera and with the biggest smile he can muster, says, "Morning baby, kain ka nang breakfast mo, ah?"
.010 | e a r s
"Tumigil ka na nga, baby, napaka-epal mo talaga," Cairo says, pulling Gavreel's fingers off his ears, and Gavreel laughs and snuggles closer, pouting, "Ikaw naman baby, naglalambing lang naman kasi isang linggo lang kitang kasama," and Cairo tries to hide the guilt washing over him by smiling and pinching Gavreel's ear instead.
.011 | n a m e
Cairo finds it annoying when Gavreel keeps calling him baby because he has a name, but at the same time, he'd rather die than let Gavreel see the smile threatening to break out every time he says "Hi, baby."
.012 | s e n s u a l
Cairo doesn't understand how Gavreel can be so comfortable taking his shirt off in front him, but even more baffling is the fact that he can't seem to turn away whenever he sees Gavreel's body.
.013 | d e a t h
Cairo can still hear the pain in Gavreel's voice after he ended the call, his words playing over and over in his head like a broken record, and he closes his eyes and asks himself how he could be so stupid, stupid enough to let Terrence into his head, stupid enough to accuse Gavreel of using his grandmother's death to get closer to him.
.014 | s e x
When the fundraiser dies down and Pearl and the boys start to fill the backyard with the clinking of beer bottles and laughter, Cairo decides it's finally time and he leans over to whisper in Gavreel's ear, "Sige, baby, handa na ako," and his heart starts to race when he sees the biggest smile he's ever seen on Gavreel's face.
.015 | t o u c h
When their lips touch for the first time, Cairo swears he can feel himself floating, and he's thankful that Gavreel is right there to keep him on the ground.
.016 | w e a k n e s s
"Bakit high-blood ka na naman, baby?" Gavreel teases as he leans closer to the screen, dimples poking into his cheek, and Cairo turns away in a flash, his face heating up and a smile betraying the corners of his lips, and he tries to fix his face before replying, "Kasi nakakagigil talaga yung mukha mo, gago!"
.017 | t e a r s
No matter how much Cairo wipes his eyes, the tears can't seem to stop falling, and he buries his face in his pillow to drown the sobs pouring out of his chest, wondering if he'll ever talk to Gavreel or see his smile again as he feels his heart breaking for the very first time.
.018 | s p e e d
"Hi, baby," Gavreel says with that stupid smile, and Cairo scoffs, wondering if he's falling too fast and too hard for a complete stranger, trying to keep Gavreel at a distance because there are too many maybes running through his mind, terrified that he'll just end up getting hurt in the end, so he only answers with "'Baby' ka d'yan, ano bang gusto mo kasi?"
.019 | w i n d
"Baby, ang sarap pala ng hangin, nakalimutan ko na," Gavreel says after taking off his mask, taking a deep breath as Cairo watches the wind playing with his curls, and Cairo links his fingers through Gavreel's with a smile, afraid that the wind might take him if he ever lets go.
.020 | f r e e d o m
"Baby mo na ako?" Gavreel asks, his eyes wide with disbelief, and when Cairo sees the tears starting to pool around his eyes, he finally feels ready to let the whole world know that he's Gav's baby.
.021 | l i f e
"Plano kong magtrabaho sa Manila pagtapos kung gumraduate sa college," Cairo says casually, trying to hide a smile when he sees Gavreel look up from his plate, and he doesn't need to read Gavreel's mind to know what he's thinking because the next second, Gavreel's smiling in disbelief, saying, "Talaga, baby? O sige, bibisitahin kita every month sa Bukidnon, promise!"
.022 | j e a l o u s y
"Eh, bakit naman kasi napaka-epal nung mukhang alien na yun?" Gavreel says, scrolling through Wesley's Vidgram feed until he lands on an old picture of Cairo and Wesley as children, their arms around each other's shoulders, and he throws his phone on the bed and scratches his head, "Nakakainis naman!"
.023 | h a n d s
"Anong nangyari dito, baby?" Cairo asks as he lifts Gavreel's hand, brows furrowed in concern as he runs a finger over the scars on his knuckles, and Gavreel pulls his hand back and wraps his arm around Cairo's shoulder, hiding his lie with a smile, "Wala yan, baby, natisod lang ako."
.024 | t a s t e
Cairo can't believe how good Gavreel's cooking is, and when he finishes his plate and asks for seconds, Gavreel's expectant look melts into relief.
.025 | d e v o t i o n
"Ikaw lang naman ang baby ko, wala nang iba," Cairo assures Gavreel, but Gavreel just crosses his arms and looks away because he doesn't trust Wesley not to do anything about his crush on Cairo when he leaves for Bukidnon.
.026 | f o r e v e r
"Baby, hindi ba pwedeng ganito nalang tayo?" Gavreel asks, his voice cracking, desperation coating every word, and when Cairo gives him a kiss and pulls him closer, he buries his face in his neck, trying to keep himself from falling apart in Cairo's arms.
.027 | b l o o d
After ending the call, Gavreel smashes his fist into the wall next to him, tears blurring the frustration burning in his eyes, and when he looks at his hand and sees bright red blood pooling in the space between his knuckles, he finally lets himself cry.
.028 | s i c k n e s s
Cairo stares at the screen for what seems like an eternity, tears sliding down his cheeks and a hand coming up to grip his chest because all of a sudden, it hurts to breathe, every ragged breath a reminder of the pain in Gavreel's face before ending the call.
.029 | m e l o d y
"Angel of Peace, patawarin mo na 'ko please," Cairo sings softly to himself as he sticks clouds on the wall, wondering if Gavreel would even entertain his little game, wondering if Gavreel would ever forgive him in the first place.
.030 | s t a r
"Alam mo kung anong nakikita ko dun, baby?" Gavreel asks, nudging Cairo and pointing at a collection of stars above them, and before Cairo can prepare himself for another cheesy line, Gavreel turns to him with a smile and continues, "Yung mga mata mo, maganda kasi parang bituin."
.031 | h o m e
"Ang hirap naman kasi, baby," Gavreel says, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand, and Cairo leans over and taps Gavreel's chest with his finger, right over his heart, and says, "Kahit saan naman ako pupunta, this is home, wag na wag mong kalimutan, baby, ha?"
.032 | c o n f u s i o n
Cairo doesn't understand why Gavreel keeps annoying him because he's not into working out or eating healthy or even as good-looking, nothing at all like that stupid Terrence guy.
.033 | f e a r
"Alam mo..." Cairo begins as he turns away, and when Gavreel hears a hint of finality in his voice, like he's already made up his mind, he cuts him off with "Wag na!" and ends the call, scared of what Cairo might have said if he continued.
.034 | l i g h t n i n g / t h u n d e r
Gavreel is lightning, quick to lash out as his frustration bursts out of him like fireworks, and Cairo is thunder, his anger slowly creeping until it explodes without warning in a deafening roar.
.035 | b o n d s
"Baby, matulog na, ano pa ba kasi ginagawa mo?" Cairo asks with a yawn, still half-asleep, and Gavreel stops scrolling through wedding rings on his phone and turns it off quickly before saying, "Ah, wala lang baby, si Pearl kasi post ng post ng mga stories, parang trabaho nya."
.036 | m a r k e t
"Ano ba 'yan, baby, bakit ang dami naman junk food?" Gavreel exclaims, watching Cairo break out into a wide grin as the throws bag after bag of chips into the shopping cart and sticking out his tongue.
.037 | t e c h n o l o g y
Gavreel doesn't even know where to begin with online gaming, but after seeing Caimazing's livestream with that interesting headband and impossibly cute smile, he's determined to play a game for a chance to win his heart.
.038 | g i f t
Gavreel can't stop grinning as he packs up the pillow in the bag, mind running wild with how he imagines Cairo's reactions would be when he sees the pictures on it.
.039 | s m i l e
It's way past midnight and Cairo turns over in his bed for the hundredth time, his mind replaying the same thing over and over again, "Gavreel... Gavreel Alarcon... Angel of Peace... Gav... gago... sira... epal... angel... Cairo's angel... baby... baby ko... bwisit, bakit naman kasi napaka-cute ngumiti, nakakainis!" before putting a pillow over his head and letting out a scream.
.040 | i n n o c e n c e
Gavreel clicks through the images in his gallery with a smile, Cairo's face in different stages of annoyance flashing through his screen, and when he comes across the perfect picture – Cairo holding up a condom during Pearl's scavenger hunt – he lets out a hearty laugh and says, "Ay, ang cute ng baby ko talaga!"
.041 | c o m p l e t i o n
When Cairo zips his luggage closed, it hits him all at once that he might not see Gavreel ever again, and he sits on the floor and stares at the wall, an emptiness spreading in his chest, dark and suffocating.
.042 | c l o u d s
"Ano'ng nakikita mo, baby?" Gavreel asks, pointing at the clouds overhead, and Cairo bites his tongue because all he can see is Gavreel's smile clear as day, stretching across the horizon, and he only shrugs and replies, "Edi mga ulap, ano pa ba makikita?"
.043 | s k y
Cairo rests his head on the car window and looks up at the sky, tears pooling around his eyes and a heaviness settling in his chest because he never imagined that falling in love could ever hurt this much, hurt so much that he couldn't bring himself to say goobye to Gavreel before he made his way to the airport.
.044 | h e a v e n
Cairo pulls the shirt out of the box, smiling as he reads Cairo's Angel written in rainbow ink before holding it close to his body, hoping it could leave traces of his feelings for Gavreel that he's too afraid to say out loud.
.045 | h e l l
"Mangmakalusot lang, baby," Gavreel says, and Cairo laughs and holds him tight because he can't even begin to imagine the weight Gavreel had been carrying this whole time, and he kisses his forehead and tells him, "Kung pupunta ka sa impyerno dahil bakla ka, edi bababa tayong magkahawak ng kamay at hinding hindi kita bibitawan."
.046 | s u n
Gavreel is like the sun – too bright, persistent, sometimes annoying, but also impossibly warm, searing Cairo down to his very core whenever he sees that smile.
.047 | m o o n
Cairo is like the moon – too moody, mysterious, sometimes distant, but also shining enough light in Gavreel's life to break through the darkness threatening to swallow him whole.
.048 | w a v e s
Gavreel can't contain his excitement as he goes through everything he's planned for Cairo once quarantine restrictions are relaxed, especially the few days in Matinloc where he imagines waking up to Cairo in the morning in the soft island breeze, holding Cairo's hand underwater as they swim with the turtles, the waves lapping at their feet as they take an evening stroll along the beach.
.049 | h a i r
Cairo watches Gavreel as he sleeps on his chest, running his fingers through his hair, trying to memorize the feeling of his soft curls, the sound of his breaths, and he wipes away a tear with his other hand, wishing that he'll wake up tomorrow to the smell of Gavreel cooking breakfast, Gavreel annoying him with kisses as he livestreams, watching a movie after a pizza dinner, listening to Gavreel snoring without a care in the world, wishing with all of his heart that it wasn't their last night together.
.050 | s u p e r n o v a
Cairo thinks his life is like a supernova and Gavreel is the nebula that follows, colorful and brilliant and beautiful, shining brightly against his doubts and fears and the uncertainty of tomorrow.