Shahzain took steps towards her bride in a slim fit prince coat over crisp black kurta and pajama. Detailed on rich silk, handcrafted for a beautiful, subtle, detailed and elegant. A classic jewel crusted brooch was completing the look for his regal entry. But his face, his face has splashes of blood. His hands were dripping blood and his eyes were screaming danger.
"Shahzain, first come with me" Faizan stopped him keeping a hand on his chest before he could reach Sitara breaking their staring contest. She casted her eyes down but her breathing was erratic. He came drenched in someone's blood at his own wedding. The thought made her breathing shallow in fear.
"Faizan, humne pehle hi hamari Jaana ko bahot intezar karwa diya, pehle usse to mil Lein?" (C'mon Faizan, I have already mad my Life wait for long, first I should meet her) "No, your face, first lets remove this blood" he told him and it's like he just realized. He touched his face from the back of his palm and look at the smudge blood on his hand. He looked at his hands too that were covered in blood and his dress too. "Tsk tsk tsk that mother fucker" he said irritated and then he realized something and let out a sinister laugh. "Oh so that's why you are asking me to come with you, Faizan have you seen blood for the first time, idiot" He said jokingly to him, like it's nothing "Not me, but they all have seen for the first time" Faizan said drawing his attention to her family "Yeah" he said looking at every one's shocked expressions. Rihan was too shocked, Zahra looked like she will faint seeing the atrocious nature of the man she is sending her daughter with. Rihan was holding her so that she doesn't fall. Nargis couldn't open her eyes, thank God Ruku is asleep.
"But Jaana tumhe to iski aadat daalni padegi" (but my life, you have to build a habit of seeing this) he said reaching her.
He pulled a string and the flower separater which was the only thing between him and his girl, fell making her shudder. He crouched in front of her. Beautiful, no winsome, no gorgeous, no heavenly. He was not able to decide which word could describe the beauty sitting in front of him. It felt like he is looking at the moon herself.
She flinched as his hand stretched towards her but he didn't touch her. He was just looking at her with mesmerized eyes, instead he picked up the nikahnama and looked at it. A smirk came to him seeing her signatures. He held out the file for Faizan to take it and he did while he was still looking straight at her
He took out a Black Rose from his front pocket of the sherwani "Janamdin Mubarak ho Sitara Shahzain Khan" (Happy birthday) he said and Sitara lifted her wide eyes which met his. He was the only one who remembered that today its not just her wedding its her eighteenth birthday too. Jis din athra ki hogi us din hamari hogi ,his words echoed in her ears and she saw the contentment in his eyes as he fulfilled his promise. (The day you will be eighteen, will be the day you will be mine)
Her hands trembled taking the rose from him "J-Ji sh-shuk-shukriya" she stuttered a thank you and he smiled at her.
"Black Rose, where did you find this? Isn't it extremely rare?" Nargis asked looking shockingly at the rose and just then Sitara actually looked at the rose. She was so bound in his trance that her fear devoid her from actually looking at anything else than his eyes. Looking at the rose, her eyes mirrored the shock in Nargis' eyes.
She didn't know that they actually existed. She always read that Black roses aren't exactly black. Instead, black roses derive their color from intense shades of purple or red rather than pure black. How he got this? She wondered. This flower is so beautiful. It has its own beauty, it's the darkness itself yet it's the most alluring thing she ever saw.
"Ofcourse they are rare Nargis Bhabhi, but they have unrivaled beauty, just like my Jaana " he said as he brushed his fingers along with Sitara's holding the rose.
He could have brought the red roses that symbolizes love and beauty and are available in abundance but he chose to bring the most aesthetically beautiful flower for the most divinely beautiful girl.
Some say black rose symbolizes death, some say mystery, for some a tragic love but for him, this flower stands for his deeply passionate love for his Sitara.
"You made it happen, I thought the turkish trader ditched at the last moment?" Faizan asked him. He has seen him trying to procure the black rose from Turkey since one year for this day. Finally after spending a fortune he found a trader who could bring the rare beauty from Turkkey, but even he backed out at the last moment. He saw the need in Shahzain's eyes and he realized maybe this flower had more value than he expected and he decided to trade it in the open black market.
"Ofcourse I did, I would have traveled myself to Turkey to get this exquisite beauty for my Jaana. But he made my job easy trying to betray me and sell it in the open market. I just have to kill a few fifty men to get it. And now see it's where it should be. Only my Janna deserves a beauty like this." He said bewitched by her.
Where Faizan shook his head seeing the utter guilt-free insanity he calls love, Sitara was too numb to think or say anything. It was like someone took away the sense of understanding from her. Looking into his eyes she wondered Is this for real? He killed a whole market only to get a flower for me. What kind of love is this? She was too shocked to even shiver in fear.
"Come lets wash off the blood", and he went inside the house followed by Faizan to clean off the blood.
"Allah ye kaisi haiwaniyat ke sath naseeb jodein hain tune meri bacchi ke" (oh God with which devil has you tied the fate of my daughter) Zahra said holding her chest as she sat down on the nearby armchair. "Ammy please talk softly, they will hear it" said Rihan trying to calm her down. Though he himself not sure how to behave after listening something like this. He saw the proud in Shahzain's eyes and words when he was narrating how he got that rose for her. How can someone has no remorse for killing fifty men, hell he wasnt even sure if the number is less or more. He saw him killing that man in the fair, he can only imagine what Shahzain would have done to that trader. But what dismayed him is that there is no contrition in him, whatsoever for doing something that gruesome and then call it love.
How will he sleep sending his sister off with someone like this.
"Rihan, don't send her there. How can we do this? Phool si naazuk hai meri bacchi, aur wo-wo Rihan kaise jiyegi wo uske sath" (my daughter is delicate like a flower. And he-he-Rihan, how will she live with him) Zahra said crying and Nargis was sobbing too.
"Ammy please, Nargis, set up his dinner" he said to Nargis and she got up wiping her tears. Only he knows how he is fighting the dilemma. His guilt of sending Sitara with him is killing him inside but how can he not when Shahzain gives them a teaser almost everyday of all the terrifying things that could happen if he didn't get his Sitara. All his hopes are in Shahzain's love that he has for his sister, that maybe he will burn down this world but will not hurt his sister for he loves her too much.
Where Shahzain's love is giving him refugee from his guilt of sending his sister with a monster, the same love was filling Zahra's heart with the dread. She fears that a love so atrocious will not know where to stop. What if he ends up hurting her daughter and give it the name of love.
"Bhaijaan aa gaye kya" Ruku said waking up. She rubbed her eyes and Rihan was about to stop her but just then Ruku got up and ran "Bhaijaan" they turned expecting a scared Ruku but she was giggling.
They looked at him and he was cleaned, no sign of blood or the cruelty what they just witnessed. He crouched down to her level "Where were you? I slept waiting for you. And my Appi she was waiting for you since so long wo to soi bhi nahi. Koi apne hi nikah mei late aata hai kya."(my sister, she didn't even sleep. Who comes late in their own wedding?) She scolded him and he laughed a bit. Only she could talk to him like this. How did she do not feel the fear he emits. Thought Sitara looking at them
"Sorry Gudiya, Yun samajh lijiye ki aapki Appi ke liye unke janamdin ka tohfa dhundhne mei der ho gai" (Sorry little doll, just think that I got late in finding the perfect birthdaygift for your sister) he said and Sitara felt his eyes on her.
"Chalo ab Appi se sorry bolo" (Come now apologize to her) she said holding his hand and their eyes widen. "Ruku leave it, don't irritate him. Come Bhaijaan let's eat" Rihan said as Nargis set up their table. Rihan was also waiting to eat with him. "But I am not irritating him, I am just telling him to say sorry-" "Ruku, beta wo bade hain na, jane do. Koi baat nahi. Kisi kaam se Der hui hogi. Aao aap. Appi ke sath baitho" (Ruku, child. He is elder right? Let it be. He must got stuck in some work that's why he got late. Come you sit with your sister) said Nargis to save Ruku from hurting his baseless ego. She is not wrong, she is a child, she doesn't know what he is. She is growing up in a normal home with normal people. Where they teach her to say sorry on your mistakes not throw daggers if someome peeps from your door.
"Bade hain to kya hua, galti to ki hai na. Appi bhi to badi hai wo bhi humko sorry bolti hain, to Bhaijaan Appi ko sorry kyu ni bolenge" (So what if he is elder, he did a mistake. Appi is also elder to me but she also apologizes to me them why he won't) said Ruku with all her innocence. "Bilkul bolenge, Gudiya" Shahzain said before Nargis could counter Ruku. "Good. But sirf sorry hi nahi gift bhi dena padega Appi ko" (but sorry is not enough, you have to give her a gift also) Ruku said and he picked her in his arms.
"Really, alright." He said and kissed her cheeks and they came towards Sitara "But first take your gift" he said as they settled in front of her. "My gift?" "Yes, here" he held his hand and Faizan handed him a box. Ruku opened the gift so excitedly "Doctor set!' She exclaimed in happiness. "You wanted to be a Doctor, right? Here" he said and put the stethoscope in her ears and the other end on to her heart. "Woah, ye to sacchi mei sunai de raha hai!" (It's real!) "Ofcourse you cannot become Doctor, playing toys" he said and she kept the other on his heart. She giggled hearing his heart beat and hugged him happily saying thank you. "And this is for our Choti Ruku" he said and Faizan gave him another box. Ruku clapped happily and opened the other gift "Its a doll house, Appi look its so pretty" she said cheerfully. She hugged him again saying that this one is from Doll's side and he chuckled hugging her back.
"Ruku, come here" Nargis called her and she went to her taking her gifts as he crouched down in front of her. "Come Nargis, let's set up the table" said Rihan and she saw her family went inside with Faizan leaving her alone with the monster
"Hamara intezar karne ka shukriya, Jaana" (thank you for waiting for me) he said in a soft tone. "To bataiye kya keemat hai aapki maafi ki?" (What is the price of your forgiveness)
"Bolo kya chahti hai hamari Sitara, hmmm" (say, what does my Sitara wants?) He picked the mirror that Nargis brought for Arsi Mushraf and kept between them.
Sitara looked down and saw his reflection along with herself. His eyes met hers, and for a moment her heart skipped a beat. In that moment there wasn't any malice, wasn't any cruelty in those eyes. The monster was gone, hidden deep inside somewhere she couldn't see. All she saw was his beautiful eyes that reminded her of the hot chocolate she would drink as a kid during winter. A deep, rich, chocolate color, not cold like a dagger but warm like the rays of sun on a chilli winter day. Eyes that held the promise of eternal love.
Looking at his Sitara he felt like these eyes holds his whole world. The beautiful eyes those look like the sunshine through a glass of whiskey. All he wanted was to keep her inside his eyes and shut them forever. Protect her from this awful world, love her, cherish her and drown in her.
"Lijiye Nikah ki aakhri rasam bhi puri hui ab bus ruksadi rehti hai, jiska intezar hum ek saal se kar rahein hain." (The last ritual of the wedding is completed, now its time to say farewell, something I am watching since one year) he said breaking the trance his eyes has kept her into.
"Maang lo Jaana, aaj to tumhara nikah hua hai, aur janamdin bhi hai. Tohfa to banta hai." (Demand what you want my life, today is your wedding and your birthday, you deserve a gift)
"You already gave what I asked. Meri Mehar wali maang rakhne ke liye shukriya" (thank you for accepting my terms for the Mehar amount) she thanked him for the fixed deposits he made just like she wanted. "Yeah but that is your right bestowed by your God, now its turn to ask your Devil" he said calling himself Devil. She felt bad that he feels himself as the Devil.
"Anyway you didn't keep anything out of that Mehar for yourself." He added. "Yo-you have already brought this-this flower. It's-its very beautiful" she stuttered looking at the flower in her hand.
"Yes it is, but not more than my Jaana." He said holding her hand. "It was something I chose, you tell me what you want. I mean hamari Jaana ka janamdin ho aur hum use uski marzi ka tofa na dein ye to gunnah hoga. Waise hi bahot gunnah kar chuke hain hum aur ek hum karne ja rahein. Ek pyari si Gudiya ko is duniya se chura ke qaid karne ka. Ek azad chidiya ki udaan usse cheen rahein hain hum, kam ke kam uske janamdin pe uske chehre pe muskurahat to lane do. Batao kya hai hamari Jaana ki khwahish" he said lifting her chin and all she could see in his eyes is love. Where gone the monster who killed only to get a rose and was bragging about it moments ago. (And it's my life's birthday and it will be a sin if I won't give her a gift of her choice. And I have already done a lot of sins already plus I am about to commit one. I am going to cage a sweet, beautiful, innocent bird. I am going to cut of the wings of a free bird, atleast all I can do is bring a smile on her face on her birthday. So tell me what is that my Life wants)
"J-Jo ma-maangugi wo denge" (Will you really give what I will ask) she said gathering all the courage she could muster. Where on one hand, the realization that she will be gone today forever, killed a piece of her, on the other hand it helped this courage to finally pump it.
"Humse rihaai chhod ke jo chahe wo maang lo. Everything is yours" (Except freedom from me, take whatever you want)
"I-I wa-want to hug my family goodbye. And you will not hurt them for that" I said "Can you give me that?" She asked the thing she craved most in this one year. The freedom to hug them. She lifted her eyes and saw him staring straight at her like he is going to eat her up.
For the first time she asked him something and that was to touch someone else. Why? Why for once she can't see how much he craves her, why she always want others, why is he not enough for her? His heart was stabbing him with all these questions but a voice in him silenced those just few moments more, than my Jaana will be all mine. Few moments more.
He didn't say anything and got up and moved at the dinner table. She looked down with teary eyes. It is easy to say big words about love, but the truth is everything is just a facade. She cursed him.
"Tara, come you too eat now. Khan Saheb too sat for dinner with your brother" Came Nargis and she wiped her tears quickly. She kept the plate in front of her and asked all worried "Sitara why are you crying, did he hurt you? Allah, Ruku shouldn't have said all that, how can you expect a monster to say sorry. What he did to you Tara-" "Nothing. He did nothing." She said ending her rant. "You are not lying right?" "No, I was just overwhelmed that I will miss you all" "Oh Tara. You don't know how much the thought is killing me." She said and Sitara nodded. "Come. Eat something now, you haven't eaten anything since morning." She said "I will leave so you can remove your veil, you can eat comfortably. Call me when you are done" she said. Though she had enough practice of eating with veil but she could see that the outfit is making it difficult. Sitara too didn't want it to get it spoiled either. "No don't go. Stay. I want you to be with me." Sitara made her stay, she don't know how she will live without her, she was her biggest support whole her life
Once the dinner is over, Faizan told that they will leave now. Her heart skipped a beat on realizing that it's time. "Come Sitara" Nargis said.
Dejected, helpless, annoyed and unwillingly she tried to get up but again the weight of her dress made her stumble, but this time she didn't fall. A strong pair of hands held her waist before she could've fallen. "You won't fall when I am around" he said straightening her. She didn't say anything because she was angry at him.
She was taking slow steps, one because she didn't want to go and second because the heavy dress and the weight of her anklets were slowing her down. Rihan opened the main door and for a moment she wanted to run back and hide. She was scared. There wasn't an excitement of a new bride in her, no happy nervousness but it was fear, just fear.
They stepped out and "Appi" she felt Ruku hugging her from behind. She turned to look at her and crouched beside her and cried hugging her. She cried hard. "I will miss you Appi."
She broke the hug and kissed her all over the face. Even though there is a separation of veil between them yet she didn't want to miss this moment. "Meri Gudiya" (My doll) she said wiping her tears. "Don't cry. Promise me Ruku, you will always keep smiling, and whether you become a doctor or not, become a good human." She said caressing her head. "Hamesha aisi hi rehna meri Gudiya. Hasti khelti rehna. And don't forget that your Appi loves you the most" (always be like this my Doll. Always keep laughing and playing) she said kissing her cheeks and hugged her.
"Sab Ruku se hi keh dogi, ya bakiyon ke liye bhi kuch chodegi" (will you finish all your goodbyes with Ruku, or will you save something for others too) he said. Her head snapped towards him and her eyes were wide at his words.
He had his signature smirk plastered.