Song: Illicit Affairs- Taylor Swift
There has only ever been one time where I almost saw what Hunter drew inside his sketchbook.
It was the summer after he broke my heart. I was almost 17, and it was the last summer we were able to go to the safehouse because little had we known, Demetrius had managed to break through the grid and attack me. Although he never figured out where exactly we were, mom and dad decided it was too much of a risk to return the next summer. That attack from Demetrius and the loss of the only place I had peace wasn't even the most memorable part of that last summer at the safehouse-- it was catching a glimpse of Hunter's sketchbook and getting caught by him.
Hunter had just turned 22, so Bennett and Brett took him out for his birthday. I was kind of pissed off that he could freely roam the city and hang out with other people without any concern in the world, meanwhile I had to be stuck at the safehouse watching Grey's reruns with uncle Tobias. Not that I minded that part-- I love me some good medical dramas-- but I wanted to go out and have a good time too. I wanted to experience a normal birthday or evening out with friends without worrying that someone might crash my party by killing me for being a mind deceiver.
Maybe I was also jealous when I thought about the fact that Hunter was probably flirting with girls at the bar and dancing with them to celebrate another year of being legal, especially since he didn't get to go out for his 21st birthday the year before. It almost made me sick to think about it.
Why did I feel like that? I hated him with every fiber of my body for how he broke my heart. I hated him for the things he said about me, how he always treated me like a little kid when others were around. There was no reason to be jealous. Yet there I was, imagining the worst case scenarios of him with other girls at the bar, and I as I sat on the couch with uncle Tobias, not paying one bit of attention to the episode on TV, I gripped the pillow that was laying on my lap so tight that if I thought about him any longer, there might've been a stuffing explosion.
"You don't look like you're thinking about McDreamy," Uncle Tobias observed, lowering the volume of the TV as he leaned up to peer at me. I glanced at him before quickly looking away, my cheeks burning.
"I've been paying attention to the show the whole time, uncle Tobias."
"Why don't you be honest with your dear old uncle?" He sighs dramatically before holding out his pinky finger. "I promise I won't tell anyone."
I gnawed on my lip, contemplating if I should open up and just let it all out instead of bottling it up and preparing to destroy the poor pillow in my hands. With a huff, I mumbled, "Do you think Hunter is having a good time? Like, a really good time tonight?"
He's silent for a minute. All he does is eye me. But then, the tiniest of smirks appears on his lips. "Are you... jealous?"
"Of course not!" My voice raised three octaves, which totally didn't give away my true feelings. My face felt even hotter than before. "I'm just wondering where he went with his friends, who else they invited or met up with, how he's celebrating..."
"Honey, I can guarantee he's getting drunk off his ass and playing pool with his friends at a downtown bar."
"Oh, what? You don't think girls are there too?" I hiss, sending a deathly glare toward uncle Tobias before holding the pillow tighter in my hands to the point that it shakes slightly. "They're probably obnoxiously leaning over the pool table to get his attention and then asking him to dance in a very provocative way."
"You're really dwelling on this, aren't you?" Uncle Tobias teases, barely holding back his laughter. "I can also guarantee that he is doing none of that or entertaining it if it is happening."
"How do you know? Can you see where he is right now?"
"No, but I know because you exist."
My eyebrows crinkle in confusion. "I'm not even there."
"Obviously. I mean that he's not going to do anything with other girls because he doesn't want to. Because you are the one who has his eyes and his heart."
I laugh out loud. "You're a real jokester, uncle Tobias. Now be realistic."
"It doesn't get more realistic than that."
"I don't think we're talking about the same Hunter."
"I used to change that kid's diaper and babysit you both," He scoffed, leaning back on the couch with his arms behind his head. "Trust me, I'm talking about the same exact Hunter."
"Well, you sure could've fooled me," I muttered, rolling my eyes as I stood to escape to my room. There was no point in continuing to watch the show. I wasn't paying attention and I figured I could just evade my thoughts about Hunter's night out by trying to knock myself out with sleep.
Uncle Tobias chuckled as I walked away before calling out, "Just give it another year. You'll be in for a whole world of change when you turn 18."
I chose to ignore that comment and walked into my room, closing the door so nobody would bother me for the rest of the night. I knew I was going to have to mentally prepare myself for when Hunter came home. Hell, maybe he wouldn't come home at all. Maybe he'd stay out with his friends all night or find some girl to go home with. Thinking about that made me even more nauseous than before. I rapidly shook my head and started walking toward my side of the room, but then, I noticed the desk lamp on Hunter's side was still on, and it was shining on his sketchbook. It just laid there on his desk, pencils with different shades of gray scattered around it. I slowly walked up to it, feeling nervous as I peered down at it, and apprehensive at the thought of even just touching it. He had been drawing in it a lot more often, and he would get so focused on whatever he was drawing, he wouldn't even hear what anyone was saying to him, including me. Of course, I just thought that he was doing it on purpose to me to make me annoyed. We could rarely ever be civil to each other in those days after my first kiss or after I heard what he said about me to Bennett.
I wasn't sure why I was nervous as I stared at his sketchbook. It was probably just some ordinary sketches of scenery or still life things. Curiosity got the best of me though, and I found myself pinching the edge of the sketchbook with my fingers and lifting it slightly. I didn't see a drawing yet, but the hammering of my heart forced me to quickly let go of the edge, watching as it fluttered close again. I shouldn't have been doing it. But, I couldn't help myself. I wanted to see what he was sketching with so much focus all the time. So, I grabbed the edge again, releasing a deep breath before lifting it open once more, just enough so I could have a peek. Finally, I could see pencil markings and shading. I still couldn't see the full image, though. I opened it a little more, and could make out a quarter of the drawing. It was a baby, wrapped up in swaddle, and the only thing I could see was its face. I leaned a little closer, my eyes squinting as I tried to figure out who it was. The more I examined it, the more I felt like I knew who I was looking at. In a weird way, it almost looked like me. I slowly lifted the cover more, revealing more of the drawing--
And then the book slammed shut, but not through my actions. A hand overlapped mine on the cover of the sketchbook, and I glanced wide eyed to the side of me, where an angry Hunter stood. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"
I stared at him in complete and utter shock. When had he come in? I didn't even hear the door open behind me. My mouth opened and closed like an idiot as I just kept staring at him, and with each second that I didn't speak, his sharp eyes glowered more. He shoved my hand off the sketchbook. "You know what, don't even freaking answer that. Of course you'd try to meddle in my personal stuff. You just can't resist yourself."
The fear I felt moments before faded as it was replaced with anger that reflected his. "Wow, okay, asshole. I don't care about your personal stuff. In case you forgot, I hate you," I stubbornly crossed my arms over my chest. "I don't care about what's in that stupid book anyway."
He humorlessly chuckled. "Then why were you looking at it?"
My mouth snapped shut. I didn't have an answer to that because I did care about what was in it. I wanted to know so bad what his drawings were of, why he spent so much time on them. I had never had the opportunity to see them until I found the sketchbook out in the open like it had been on his desk.
Not having an answer, though, only sent Hunter's anger through the roof. "Any other time you can run your mouth, but now you wanna be silent, huh?" He shoves the pencils off his desk, sending them flying to the floor near me. "You have no right to go through my stuff! Don't ever touch anything of mine again! Do you hear me?" He screamed, and I stood there, shaking, anger dissipating and replaced with fear once again. I knew he wouldn't hurt me, but he had never yelled at me like that. I was unable to meet his eyes as tears welled in my own. I couldn't speak, but then he slammed his hand against the desk, and I flinched. "I said, do you hear me, dammit!"
"Y-yes," I choked out, looking down more so he couldn't see my embarrassed tears slipping down my cheek. "I'm sorry, Hunter."
He stormed out of the room, slamming the door on his way out, making me flinch again. I remained standing there with tears trickling down my cheeks. My eyes flickered to the pencils scattered around my feet, and I bent down to pick them up, wiping away my tears with the back of my hand as I collected all of them. But then, the door opened harshly, and Hunter stormed toward me. I stood up straight, gripping the pencils tight in my hand, but he caught me completely off guard when he grabbed my face in his hands and crashed his lips against mine. I was taken back at first and didn't kiss him back, but then the pencils slipped from my grasp as I laid my hands over his and followed the movement of his lips, the salt from my tears mixing in with our kiss. My back hit the wall as he kissed me fiercely, and I could barely breathe from the fast movement of his lips, could barely think from how mesmerizing his lips were and the way they moved against mine as if there was never another girl he could kiss the way he kissed me. Hunter only pulled away when he needed to catch his breath, and I took the time to do the same, although I was confused as all hell as I stared up at his hooded eyes. His chest rose rapidly as he sucked in quick breaths.
"You frustrate the hell out of me," He muttered, pecking my lips. "Why do you have to do that?" He kissed me longer that time.
"Aren't you mad at me?" I whispered against his lips.
"Of course I am. You piss me off all the time and do things you know I hate."
"Oh," I mumbled, trying to move away from him as I bit my lip to keep from crying again, but he pulled me toward him, brushing his thumb against my bottom lip to pull it out from my teeth.
"Like when you do this. I hate it. It frustrates me. It pisses me off," He rubbed his finger across my lips, his eyes trained on his movements. "But I only feel that way when it comes to you."
"Wow, I must really embody everything you hate," I tried to laugh, but my heart ached at the thought of being the most annoying thing in the world to him. Hunter removed his thumb and placed one last slow, gentle kiss against my lips, and then he pulled me into his arms for an embrace. Like the kiss, it caught me completely by surprise, but I allowed myself to enjoy his warmth anyway. It was rare for me to have it since our first kiss the year before.
"Not quite," He mumbled, and I barely caught it, so I wasn't even sure if that was what he said. The next thing he said, though, I heard loud and clear. "I'm sorry for yelling at you. You didn't deserve that. Just... don't touch my stuff without asking first, okay?"
I wrapped my arms around his torso, pressing my cheek against his chest. "Are you drunk?"
"No, I'm not drunk," He chuckled softly.
I pulled away slightly to shoot him a deadpan look. "You're seriously telling me you went out for your birthday and aren't drunk."
"I left early, actually. I had a few drinks, but I have different priorities than my friends."
I wasn't sure what he meant by that at the time, but I just figured he meant not getting drunk off his ass like uncle Tobias said he would. If only I had known then what he truly meant, and how it had nothing to do with drinking but everything to do with me. Hunter held me for a little longer before he let go to get a shower and change. While he was gone, I tucked myself into bed and closed my eyes, trying to fall asleep. When Hunter was finished his shower, I thought he was going to get into bed on his side of the room, but then he surprised me for the second time that night when he slid in behind me and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling my back against his chest. I nestled into his arm that was under my head, allowing the soft sounds of his breathing to lull me to sleep.
When I woke up the next morning, Hunter was gone, and his sketchbook was too. He kept a lock on the drawer of his desk that held the sketchbook every day after that.
***
Present
Hunter left early this morning, so when I wake up, I'm alone. I'm not sure where he went, which wouldn't have been a big deal if he hadn't acted so strange the night before. After training, he went to a meeting with dad, the uncles, and Brett, and I decided to take a nice, cool shower after the intense last half hour of training. The meeting went on for hours, and I wondered what they were talking about, seeing as dad liked to keep his meetings short and sweet. It was very uncharacteristic of him to keep a meeting running until midnight. Even more confusing was that, eventually, mom and aunt Hazel joined them. Although mom is second in command, she usually didn't attend the meetings. She would be there for the first five minutes to hear dad get his point across, and then her and dad would convene after the meeting was over. And if that wasn't the strangest part, nobody told me to go. In fact, when I tried to go down to join, I was promptly shoved out the door and had it slammed in my face. That made me suspicious. My suspicion grew even more when Hunter came in after the meeting and didn't say a word, even when I tried to talk to him. He just told me to go to sleep because we had to train in the morning, and he wouldn't let me turn toward him the whole night. Something was up, and I didn't appreciate being kept out of the loop by everyone. Yet, part of me thought that maybe Hunter was being strange because of our heated training session. So, I decided that was the safer option to ponder and try to fix, and luckily, I knew exactly how I could.
After I get out of bed and prepare for the day, I walk into the bathroom and open the top cabinet door, reaching inside for Hunter's birthday gift. I move my hand around, not feeling anything, so I grab a step stool and look inside the cabinet, and my heart instantly drops to my stomach.
His gift is missing.
I hop off the step stool and literally tear my bathroom apart. It's no where to be found. I frustratedly shove my hair out of my face, blowing out a breath as more panic sets in and I try to think of where else I put it. My panic is interrupted only when Cleo slams open the door of the bathroom, looking at me as if I'm crazy. With the mental breakdown I'm about to have, she wouldn't be too far off.
"Are you, like, in a crisis or something?"
"Do you remember what I got Hunter for his birthday?" She nods. "It's not here. I can't find it anywhere."
"I'm sure you just misplaced it--"
"I know exactly where I put it!" I screech, throwing more of the stuff from the cabinet beneath the sink in the air. "And now it's not there, dammit! What am I going to do?"
"First of all, you're going to take a deep breath," She roughly grabs my shoulders and turns me toward her. Cleo inhales through her nose, motioning for me to do the same, and I begrudgingly follow, and then she exhales through her mouth with me following once again. She leans back slightly. "Now, you're going to tell me why you're in such a panic over it now."
I huff out a breath. "We made out yesterday and he's acting freaking weird again."
"Hot damn!"
"Not the point, thank you," I glare. "I was going to give him the sketchbook so it would maybe stop making him act so weird. But I can't do that now because it's missing. So much for my brilliant plan."
"Well, I will gladly dedicate my time to this very important cause. Let's find that gift."
I roll my eyes but follow her into my bedroom anyway. In each space we work through, it becomes as torn up as my bathroom, until eventually, the only bare space on my floor is the little spot beside my nightstand. As I open the first drawer, and Cleo lays down to look under my bed, my bedroom door creaks open. Cleo and I immediately sit up, watching apprehensively as we wait for whoever opened the door.
"Damn, it looks like a bomb went off in here," Hunter whistles, only his head visible as he peers inside my door. "Are you looking for something?"
"No! Why would I be looking for something? There's nothing to look for," I nervously chuckle, to which Cleo elbows me hard in the side. I cough and glare at her before looking toward Hunter again, although I can't meet his eyes. "I'm just... rearranging my room. It was time for a change."
He eyes me suspiciously. "Hmm. Alright. Well, training's in five, so be on time. You'll have to finish this... rearranging later."
Hunter stares at me for a beat longer, and then he slowly closes the door. I don't even breathe until I hear his footsteps disappear, and then I release the breath I was holding and let out a whiny groan, throwing my head back. Cleo, on the other hand, clicks her tongue.
"Wow, way to be discrete, captain obvious."
"I panicked!" I squeal, throwing the magazines I had in my hands in the air. I bury my face in my hands. "I don't know what I'm going to do if I don't find that sketchbook. I swear I remember where I hid it."
Cleo sighs, patting my shoulder comfortingly. "We'll find it, okay? Don't worry. I'll look while you train."
I hesitate before nodding and leaving to go to training. When I enter the gym, Hunter is already on the sparring mat, prepping his hands. I walk onto the mat, doing a few quick stretches before I prepare myself. Hunter gets into position. "What sparked the inspiration for your rearranging?"
I cock my head to the side before throwing my first punch, which he easily dodges. "I already told you. I just wanted a change."
Hunter motions for me to kick, and I throw up my leg, landing a firm one right in the middle of the pad on his hand. He circles around me, and I follow his movements. "Yeah, sure. It looked like you were trying to find something when I walked in."
I let my eyes morph to gold and feel my powers build up, keeping my eyes trained on his hands instead of meeting his eyes and blowing my pathetic excuse for a cover. "Nope. Nothing I need to look for. You just happened to see Cleo and I sorting my nightstand drawers."
Once my energy reaches my hands, I hold them toward the gear on Hunter's hands and send my sparking white energy toward him. His hands bounce back slightly, but he pushes against my powers, which signals me to allow them to keep building. "Do you trust me?"
"Obviously," I mutter, shoving my hands forward so more energy flows from them. "Do you trust me even when I could zap you any second?"
"I know you wouldn't, so yeah, of course I trust you," The corner of his lip quirks up and he suddenly somersaults across the floor, leading to my energy hitting the mirror that had been behind him. The sudden force of my energy against the mirror makes it crack right down the middle, and I ball my hands into fists so my powers die down. Hunter gets to his feet and looks at the mirror, slightly impressed. "Might wanna keep that energy up when it's Demetrius standing in front of you."
"Dad is gonna kill you and I when he sees that," I nod toward the mirror, and Hunter just shrugs. "Easier said than done though when I'm not specifically concentrating on it like I do in training."
"That's besides the point," Hunter tore the gear off his hands, resting his hands on his hips as he took a break. "If we trust each other, that means we can be honest about anything, right?"
I stare at him, confused, although my heart is beating a little faster as a trickle of sweat slides down my temple. "What are you getting at, Hunter?"
"I know you're hiding something, angel," He takes a confident step toward me until his chest almost touches mine, and I can feel his hot breath fan against my face. I almost don't noticed the ghost of a smirk that crosses his lips. "I'll figure it out sooner or later."
For a moment, all I can do is stare at his eyes, briefly look down at his plump lips, and then look back up to his eyes. I lick my own lips. Maybe a game of distraction would keep him off my ass while I can figure out where that damn sketchbook is. So, I close the gap between us and lean toward him, almost touching his lips, but then he quickly presses his finger against mine, a teasing smug grin gracing his stupidly kissable lips. "Not so fast. No kissing privileges until you tell me what you're hiding."
I shove him away, my cheeks burning as I storm toward the gym door. "You are the most intolerable man I've ever met in my life!"
Hunter laughs. "And you still frustrate the hell out of me, baby."
Those words out of his mouth sound familiar, but I don't pay them too much mind as I stubbornly leave him standing in the middle of the gym. I return to my room and tell Cleo all about the interrogation I had during training as we continue to flip my room upside down looking for the sketchbook. We come up empty handed which only creates more panic within me, but I decide that I'm way too exhausted from the day and call it quits for the night. Cleo and I tidy up my room and then she heads out for bed, while I grab a shower where I try to retrace all of my steps from the day before Hunter's birthday and figure out where the hell the sketchbook ended up. Everywhere I think of, Cleo and I looked. I figure I'll just look again tomorrow in some less obvious spots around the house and see if I can find it. Otherwise, I really am just going to have to tell Hunter the truth while figuring out another way to get him to stop being so awkward after yesterday's training.
Just as I walk out of the bathroom, Hunter walks in to my room, clad in his pajamas. He glances around, his eyebrows furrowed. "So... what exactly did you rearrange in here?"
Oh, this is not good. I hadn't thought this far. I need to feign innocence so he doesn't suspect anything. The only problem is, Hunter's damn good at seeing right through me. So, I raise an eyebrow and cross my arms over my chest. "You seriously can't tell the difference?"
"I've been in your room almost every night since you last changed it when you were 16, so no. Literally nothing is different."
"You just aren't paying attention to the small details."
"No, I'm just not blind and stupid."
"Well, I'll let you ponder on it for a little longer and then maybe you'll see it better," I stretch and walk over to my bed, quickly slipping under the covers. Hunter shakes his head before joining me.
"Why don't you just give it up and tell me what you were looking for instead?"
I throw my arm around his waist, burying my head in his chest. "Sleepy time. Talk tomorrow."
Hunter gently shoves away my arm and scoots closer to the edge on his side. "It's a little hot in here tonight."
I peek open one eye, looking at him questioningly. Personally, I'm freezing, which is why I'm wrapped up in the blanket like a burrito. Hunter also looks cold, based on how I can see him visibly shivering. I heave a sigh. "Oh, come on. You're not mad at me again, are you?"
"No," He shoots me a quick, nervous smile, which totally came out of nowhere. "Seriously, I'm just feeling overheated. I'm not mad."
Hunter rolls onto his side, his back facing me, and all I can do is stare at him. He's acting weird. Even weirder than before, which is concerning to me. Something's up, and I have to figure out what it is. It's then that I realize his probing to figure out what I was doing was a cover up to hide what he's doing, which would explain why he's been acting weird since our training yesterday. As I watch him close his eyes and drift off to sleep, I feel tears prick my eyes as I listen to the soft sounds of his breathing. I don't think I can survive another round of losing him— especially not when I've realized just how in love with him I am. Especially not when saying those words to him is just barely balancing on the tip of my tongue. I think, if I lose him, it might be even worse than losing the battle to Demetrius.
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Hi loves!
Beginning part of this chapter is one of my favorite young Hulaska moments ♥️ also the song for this chapter fits younger them SO PERFECTLY 😭
Please vote, comment, share, and spread the word!
Thank you for reading!
Much love,
Abby