I remember begging my mom to let Alli sleepover for the first time.
We were six, and I didn't want the playdate we had that day to end. We spent hours running through the sprinklers. It was the first time I saw her natural hair, the water made it curly. I remember her smile when I told her that I liked it.
After hours of begging, both our moms had finally gave in. She set up an air mattress next to my bed in my room. I hid everything that I thought wasn't cool, and chucked all my toys under my bed for good measure.
"I can sleep on the floor," Alli offered in a quiet voice.
I remember knowing I didn't want her to do that, but I couldn't put it into better words. So, instead, I just said, "No."
We stayed up for hours that night. I learned a lot about her that night— things like her favorite food, favorite color, favorite anything. I can still feel the same want I felt then to be her favorite something. My eyes shut sometimes from exhaustion, but as long as she kept talking, there wasn't a chance I was falling asleep and missing any detail.
"My favorite animal is a cat, I think," Allison told me in a quiet voice. "My cat is the best, he only likes to cuddle with me."
Alli's cat absolutely hated me. Whenever I tried to pet him, he would lunge and try to scratch at me. I told her, "I wish your cat liked me."
"We'll work on it!" Alli swore to me brightly.
The first thing I loved about Alli was how easy she made it to love her. Loving her was like breathing. I didn't have to think about it. She was everything good. As the oldest, I was pretty high-strung, even at six. But I saw how she just lived and went with anything, and I wanted to be like her.
"Can I tell you a secret?" I whispered to her just before we went to bed. She nodded softly, waiting for me to continue. "I'm happy you're my best friend."
She smiled that smile that made me feel like I just gave her the sun. "I'm happy you're my best friend, too."