I don't know how to tag the potential trigger warning, so... just Polu yelling and insulting his parents and accusing his mother of being the worst parent out there.
I guess.
And a proper TW: brief mention of self-unaliving
Later that day, Polu finds his cousin walking along one of the bridges spanning the canal. "Sadu!"
The boy spins and grins down at Polu. "Hey! Done with training for the day?"
Polu doesn't respond until he reaches the top of the stairs. "Yeah." He gestures to the fans tied to his belt. "Turns out Master Pakku knows what he's talking about."
Sadu chuckles as he leans against the railing. "That generally happens with masters."
The waterbender grabs one of his fans and twirls it around. He watches with a sense of satisfaction as snowflakes dance with his movements. "I'm glad that I'm not just a bad waterbender. Something about how the fans move helps me concentrate on making my forms smoother- so Pakku says."
"That's pretty impressive," Sadu compliments. "It almost makes me wish I could do that."
"You can't bend?" Polu raises an eyebrow at his cousin.
The younger boy shakes his head. "My mom's entire family is made up of nonbenders. Turns out the element skipped over my father, too."
"Oh." Polu frowns. "But you don't wish you could bend?"
Sadu smiles lightheartedly. "Not really, no. I'm not generally one for being patient enough to work with water. I think I'd have been a better firebender."
Polu cringes at the thought.
"Sorry, forgot they're a sensitive subject."
"It's alright," Polu assures. After an awkward beat, he asks, "Do you train with other nonbenders, then?"
"I do," Sadu confirms. "It's a nice escape from the pressure of the family business."
The Advisor's face scrunches in thought. "You advise the Chief, right?"
Sadu nods. "My grandfather is the current advisor. When he passes, it'll go to my father, then to me."
Polu hums. "So you're Chief Arnook's right-hand-men." His eyes widen with realization. "You're not the one engaged to Princess Yue, are you?"
Is Sokka losing Yue to my cousin? That definitely won't cause any tension.
"No, no." Sadu huffs and rolls his eyes. "That's Hahn. An arrogant, egotistical prick. Why the Chief chose him over literally anyone else is beyond me."
"Great," Polu scoffs. "Another kid married to the worst fucking option. That always seems to be the case with this shit."
Sadu's eyes soften with sympathy. "Painful reminders?"
"Yep," the taller spits. "I don't understand why you'd do that to your kid. It's like parents forget that their child has wants of their own."
The lull in conversation turns into an uncomfortably stretched silence.
"So... do you want to meet the rest of the family?" Sadu offers.
"Oh, right!" Polu stands upright. "I forgot you mentioned that the other day. I'd love to!"
The younger boy grins and leads the Earth Prince off of the bridge.
~~~~~
Several long minutes of walking later, the boys stop in front of a big house.
"We've lived here long before Aunt Tola was born," Sadu informs. "It's close to the royal family's residence since we spend so much time with them. My parents and my aunts don't live here, though."
The pair step inside.
"Only the current advisor, their spouse, and any of their dependents live here. So it's just my grandparents." Sadu turns to his cousin with a wide smile. "I told the family that you'd probably be showing up today, so most of them should be here."
The first to enter the room is a little girl. Her dark brown hair is braided neatly, and her bright blue eyes sparkle with glee. "Sadu!"
"Hey there, Ianu." The boy laughs as the girl launches herself at him. He catches her with ease and props her on his hip. "How's my favorite little cousin?"
Ianu giggles with delight. "I'm good!" She loudly whispers, "Guess what?"
"What?" Sadu plays along as he sets the girl back on the ground.
"Chicken butt!"
Polu and Sadu both chuckle at Ianu's joke.
"Good one, kid." Sadu kneels down to be at eye level with the child. "Hey, remember the cousin I told you was coming over today?"
The girl nods quickly. Her eyes finally land on Polu and she blushes. "Is that him?"
The prince cautiously approaches her and squats next to Sadu. "Hi there, Ianu, I'm Polu. It's nice to meet you."
"You're so tall! Are you a giant?" The girl wonders.
Polu giggles, a lightness settling over his heart. "I'm tall, but not quite a giant."
"Wow." Ianu is starry-eyed.
"Where's everyone else, 'Anu?" Sadu questions.
The girl's blue eyes turn back to the younger boy. "They're in the kitchen."
The boys stand up. "To the kitchen, then."
The three make their way across the house. They pass through a few halls and by more rooms than Polu had seen in a normal home - not that he had encountered many.
As they approach the kitchen, several voices creep into their ears.
"-Just don't see why you're so against him being here!"
"He could be like his father! Arrogant and cruel, and thinks everything belongs to him. I don't want a boy like that to corrupt my family."
A much older voice croaks, "That boy is my cousin, and I have full faith that he means us no harm."
Sadu and Polu exchange nervous glances.
The first voice speaks again. "See, Mom? Grandma Yu says he deserves a chance to prove himself. She's the most direct relative he has here, so I think it's worth listening to her!"
"Gran-Gran is right, Mom. She got to meet Aunt Tola- I think she would know best."
The wind is knocked from Polu's lungs. His heart beats in his ears and his eyes widen. There's still someone alive who knew Mom? I- I can't-
Polu is startled as Ianu runs into the kitchen.
A moment later, a woman's head peeks around the corner. "I hate to break up this lovely conversation, but I think we have a bigger problem to deal with right now."
"What's wrong, Zah?"
Zah's blue eyes meet Polu's. "Tola's son is already here."
A man who looks a great deal like Sadu walks into the entryway. "You must be Polu!"
The boy bows stiffly. "It's an honor to meet you, sir," he greets.
"Nonsense," the man grins. He holds his hand out to shake. "I'm Kote. The honor is ours."
Polu grasps Kote's hand firmly. "I'm still in shock that my mother has a living family." Polu is pulled into the kitchen. There, he comes face-to-face with an abundance of new people.
"Well, we're here!" Zah claps a hand on Polu's back. "Let's get you introduced, huh?"
Zah gestures to a woman almost as tall as Polu. She has light brown hair and lighter skin than most other waterbenders. "This is my wife, Soro. And you've already met her brother Kote."
Polu shakes Soro's hand. "It's nice to meet you."
Soro smiles softly. "You too. These are our children."
She points to a boy a little older than Polu. "That's Nali, our oldest."
The brunette waves absently at the newcomer.
"Yuki is the middle child," Soro continues.
Yuki smiles and offers a shallow bow.
"I believe you've met Ianu."
Polu chuckles as the girl hugs his legs. "Yes, I have."
Another woman, a little younger than the other two, steps forward. "Call me Kyehik. I'm Sadu's mother."
The prince grins at her. "It's nice to meet you."
Polu takes a breath as he commits the names to memory.
"Do you want me to give you a refresher?" Sadu whispers.
The prince snorts and nods. "That would be great," he responds.
"Okay, so." Sadu points to his parents. "My dad, Kote, and my mom, Kyehik. My dad is the one you're related to."
Polu nods, a half-serious look on his face.
"My aunts, Soro and Zah. You're related to Soro." Sadu points to his three cousins in turn. "Nali, Yuki, and Ianu, in that order."
The Advisor takes a deep breath. "Okay. Kote and Soro are your grandparents' children... and I'm guessing your Grandma Yu is my Aunt Kura's daughter?"
Sadu nods.
"So which of your grandparents is her kid?"
"That would be my grandfather," Sadu supplies. "Grandma Viha married into the family."
"Got it," Polu whispers.
Kote nudges his mother. "Mom, is there something you'd like to say?"
The elderly woman grunts. "I still don't think this is a good idea."
"Mom!" Soro hisses. "You are the only one who thinks that. Even Dad said he wants to meet Polu!"
Sadu leans close to his cousin. "Grandpa Nikkuk is notorious for not trusting outsiders. The fact that he wants to meet you means a lot."
Polu nods in understanding.
The woman huffs again. "Call me Viha."
The prince bows respectfully. "It's an honor, ma'am."
After a moment, the group turns to a chair in the corner of the room. In a padded seat is a woman who seems to be roughly 90 years of age.
"Polu, this is my great-grandmother, Yu."
She looks so much like Mom...
"You look so much like your mother," Yu hums.
Polu's heart skips a beat. "I- I do?"
"Yes." Yu nods as a soft grin lifts her wrinkles. "She would be proud of how far you've come."
The waterbender stumbles back in disbelief. I... I don't look like Milan. I thought... I always thought...
"Oh, you poor boy," Yu sympathizes. It seems as though she can read Polu's thoughts, because next, she says, "You must've been terribly worried that you resembled that horrid man; just look at the state of you! Come here."
Polu hobbles forward, trying desperately to keep his breathing in check. Once he reaches the elderly woman, she hugs him.
One of her hands comes to rest on his head while the other rubs circles into his back. "Poor thing... Don't worry, you look nothing like him."
Polu shudders and leans into her hold.
Behind him, someone scoffs and exits the room. Two voices, one male and one female, follow after and berate the person who left.
After another minute, Zah murmurs something to Ianu and leads her away.
When Polu finally opens his eyes, he finds that the only ones left are him, Yu, Nali, Yuki, and Sadu. Embarrassment tints the boy's pale cheeks as he pulls away from his cousin.
"Would you like to hear a story about your mother?" Yu asks innocently.
Polu nods slowly.
Yu gestures to the chairs surrounding the table in front of her. Once the four children are sat, she begins her story.
"I was 10 years old when I met my dear Aunt Tola. My mother had been separated from her sister for over 30 years at this point..."
~~~~~
"Mum, where are we going?" A much younger Yu complains to her mother as they trek across the grassy lands. "My feet hurt."
Kura sighs and lifts her daughter onto her back. "Not much longer, my love. Once we reach the walls of Ba Sing Se, we're going to be escorted all the way to the palace."
"But why do we have to go? Why couldn't we stay with Daddy?" Yu rests her sleepy head on Kura's shoulder.
"I haven't seen my sister in several decades," Kura huffs. "Besides, you should get to know your cousin. He's a lot like that friend of yours."
Out of nowhere, energy seems to course through little Yu. "Potoq?"
The weary mother smiles tightly. "Yes, like Potoq. I think you'll like your cousin Bumi."
A day later, the two finally arrive at the steps of the Earth Palace. Before any of the guards can greet them, a woman races down the stairs.
She lifts the fabric of her dress to prevent a tripping hazard, yet she seems far too graceful to need to do so. Deep bags are carved under her dark blue eyes, and wrinkles seem to be settling into her skin.
"Kura!"
The waterbender grins with relief. She sets her daughter down and races toward her sister. "Tola!"
The sisters embrace tearfully, thoroughly taking each other in.
"You've grown so much!" Tola exclaims.
"I could say the same for you," Kura responds.
The women pull away from their hug after a long minute. Then, Tola notes the little girl standing behind her sister. "And who's this?"
Kura smiles warmly. "Tola, this is Yu; my daughter."
Dried eyes glitter with renewed tears. "It's- so lovely to meet you, dear."
A guard steps forward and places a hand on Tola's arm. He whispers something to her, and she nods in understanding. She smiles at her sister and niece. "My son has a few minutes between meetings. Please, let me introduce you."
So, Kura and Yu follow after the Queen Mother.
The group makes their way down a long hall lit with eerie green lamps. Finally, they reach a pair of large, dark green doors.
Tola nods at one of the men standing guard. The doors open to reveal an impossibly more green room, the golden poles being one of the few things to break up the otherwise dull area.
"Who are they?" A young voice booms from the throne at the front of the room.
Tola smiles and approaches the throne. "This is your aunt, Kura, and your cousin, Yu." The Queen Mother then turns to her family. "Yu, this is your cousin, Bumi."
Bumi nods his head as a means of bowing.
In turn, Kura and Yu offer the king bows of their own.
"It's nice to meet my mother's family," Bumi comments. "I only wish my brother were here to meet you as well."
Tola ducks her head and covers her mouth.
Yu tugs on her mother's sleeve. "Mum, what does he mean?"
Kura subtly shakes her head. "Not now, darling."
Yu huffs and crosses her arms.
Without warning, Bumi stands and walks away from the three waterbenders. "I'm sorry to leave so soon, but with my impending abdication of the throne, there's much for me to do. Please have a good day."
When the king is gone, Yu whimpers. "He's nothing like Potoq."
Kura nods in agreement. "Tola, he's nothing like the mischievous little koalaotter you told me about. Is everything alright?"
"Kura, I told you about my first son, right?" Tola mutters.
"Polu?" Kura frowns. "In that first letter you sent, you mentioned him disappearing, but that was 16 years ago. What does that have to do with now?"
The older woman takes a shaky breath and rests on the steps to the throne. "We weren't able to send out any search parties for the first six years. Milan wouldn't allow it."
Kura bites back a scoff. "Who cares what he does or doesn't allow? Polu was your child."
"You don't understand, Kura, I couldn't do anything." Tola wrings her hands as guilt stabs at her heart. "When Bumi became Earth King, he sent out party after party looking for his brother."
Yu huffs and sits on the floor. Being a child, she has no interest in what the adults are talking about. Instead, she entertains herself with a bit of water from her flask.
After what feels like an eternity, Tola speaks to Yu. "Would you like to see the palace gardens? The cherry blossoms are blooming right now."
The young girl perks up. "Yes, please!"
~~~~~
Yu chuckles apologetically. "Admittedly, I don't remember what it was Aunt Tola said before that. However, I do remember that she and Bumi had sent out search parties for five years before giving up."
"And what about the gardens?" Yuki questions. "Were they colorful?"
"The most colorful," Yu confirms. "The grass was bright green and softer than any snow we have here. There were flowers of all shapes and sizes, ranging all over the rainbow, and the cherry blossoms were the prettiest shade of pink you've ever seen."
Yuki's blue eyes brighten. "Woah! I wish I could see something like that."
The elderly woman smiles softly. "I'm sure you will one day. This war will end soon enough, and then you can see all the gardens you want."
Polu nods. "I'll let you come see the palace gardens in Ba Sing Se if you'd like."
"You'd do that?" Yuki grips Polu's arm tightly. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"
The prince chuckles. "It's not a problem. We are family, after all."
Sadu glances outside. "Oh, man, it's getting dark. I'll take you home, Polu."
The earthbender smiles sadly and stands up. "Thank you for sharing that, Yu."
"It was my pleasure, Polu," the woman grins. "You're more than welcome to come back tomorrow."
"I think I'd like that," Polu hums. "Good night."
His cousins bid him good night, then Polu and Sadu leave the family residence.
~~~~~
"You are a tyrant!" A 15-year-old Polu stomps away from his mother. "You and Father are both treasonous fucks! Do you know what you two are doing? How many people are against you two?"
The Earth Queen sighs sadly as she follows her son into his room. "Polu, please-"
"No! I'm fucking sick of you two trying to force me to marry that fucking dickwad of a future Fire Lord! I mean, come on!" He bends a boulder and punches it through the outer wall of his bedroom.
"He literally said that he wants me to birth the final Avatar! And don't even get me started on how horribly you two treat us just as your kids."
Tola slumps on her son's bed, allowing him to rant on and on.
"You treat me as nothing more than a way to secure your relationship with one of the other nations. I trust you when I come out to you, and you throw it back in my face. You tell me that I should be grateful that Azulon burned me!"
Polu scoffs loudly as he kicks another boulder through his wall. "You all but ignore Bumi half the time, and when you do acknowledge him, it's some sly comment about how if he doesn't improve, he'll be the one sold off to a world leader."
Tola feels sick to her stomach. "Your father is simply doing what he thinks is best, Hera. You have to understand-"
"I understand plenty, Mother," Polu spits. "And I've told you, it's Polu."
"Your father-"
"Is a raging asshole who you allow to ruin everything. I can't believe you'd even say that Father is 'doing what he thinks is best'. Do you really think that abusing your children and pawning them off to men twice their age is best for this kingdom?!"
Tola is silent.
"Oh, now you have nothing to say, huh? All out of defense for the bloody cocksucker who ruined the lives of me and my brother?" Polu scoffs and punches a hole through his rocky wall. "I can't believe you, Mother."
The queen hangs her head shamefully.
"I hope you know that I hate you. You've ruined my life; you've quite possibly ruined Bumi's life. I hope you know that as soon as I can, I'm fucking taking that throne and I'm moving you as far away as fucking possible."
Polu scoffs and glares at his mother. "I have tried to forgive you. I've tried to love you, despite your relentless insistence on supporting whatever torture method Father concocts for me. And yet, I hate you."
He clenches and unclenches his fists, desperate to stop himself from causing any more damage. "I hate you for not standing up to Father. I hate you for ruining my life by standing next to that motherfucker and not questioning a damn thing he says or does."
The fuming part of Polu hopes his mother is upset.
He hopes Tola's heart cries out, begging for the screaming and insults to stop.
He hopes that a meek part of her believes she deserves it.
Maybe a part of the 34-year-old believes that she deserves the onslaught of hateful words coming from her son. He was right, after all. She never stood up to Milan. How could she say that she is a good mother if she can't protect her children from one man?
"Not only that, but you've failed to protect the kingdom. By letting Father become an uncontrollable tyrant, you have allowed the nation to succumb to his horrible schemes. You have allowed all of this."
A dark shadow is cast across the woman's face as she stands. "I'll go, then. You won't have to see me before you exile me."
"I think that's best," Polu sneers.
Almost as soon as Tola leaves, a part of the prince feels bad. Most of what he had accused her of were Milan's actions.
On the other hand, she had truly allowed Milan to get away with everything. She never once stood up to him, either for herself or her children.
'No. She had to know it was coming. Maybe she'll start to come around, and then I won't exile her. Yeah. That'll work. Change is coming.'
And oh, what a miracle Tola had never taken her life.
~~~~~
Polu jolts upright, silent tears streaming down his face. I said those things to her. Spirits, I tried so desperately to forget I said all those things to her. I was horrible. Downright horrible.
As he tidies himself up for the day, he continues to mope in his guilty thoughts. I treated her no better than Milan had. Spirits, I was so awful those last few months.
The prince exits the house and begins his morning exercises. I was fucking abusive to her. His heart stops as he comes to that realization. I... I abused my own mother. Oh Spirits. What the hell have I done?
A few minutes before the three waterbenders leave for training, Sokka pulls Polu aside. "Hey, are you alright? You're doing that thing with your neck again."
"I'm fine, Sokka," Polu grunts.
The younger boy is not so easily fooled. "You've hardly said a word all morning. Normally, you have some complaint about waking up early, or you make some comment about something I'm doing."
Polu scoffs and crosses his arms defensively, but says nothing.
"You've just been silent. You know you can talk to me." Sokka tries desperately to get his friend to say something, anything. "Right?"
I'm so ashamed of how I treated Mom. If I tell anybody what I said to her, they'll see me as a monster. Maybe I am one.
"Polu, come on, what's-"
"I said I'm fine, Sokka," Polu barks. "Just leave it alone."
Sokka takes a step back, alarmed by his friend's tone. He'll come around. I'll just talk to him later.
~~~~~
After training, Polu doesn't go back to the house with Katara and Aang. He doesn't go to find Sokka. He doesn't even go to visit any of his family.
Instead, he wanders around the city. I shouldn't have snapped at him. He doesn't deserve my anger. I'm the one who should be treated like that. Yu was wrong. I'm a lot more like Milan than anyone seems to realize. I'm nothing like Mom.
I have to apologize to Sokka, but what if he's starting to see me for who I am? Some kind of abusive monster who should suffer for everything he's ever done?
It's dark by the time Polu meanders back to the house.
"Polu! Thank the Spirits! Guys, he's back!"
Katara and Aang appear from around a corner. "Polu!"
The three surround the oldest teen, each of them spewing their concerns.
"Are you okay?"
"What happened? Did someone kidnap you?"
"Where were you? We were so worried!"
Polu shrugs his way past them and sits on his new sleeping bag. "Sorry," he mutters. "I didn't mean to be gone so long, but I'm fine. No, Aang, I didn't get kidnapped."
Sokka frowns and sits next to the prince. "But you were gone for hours. Where were you?"
"I went for a walk." Polu curls into himself. He masterfully avoids the eyes of his friends as they sit in front of him.
"For five hours?" Katara questions.
"Yep. Had to clear my head."
Aang feels worry churn in his gut. "Anything you want to talk about?"
Monster. Monster. Abusive. Suffer. "Not particularly." Finally, Polu glances at Sokka. "I want to apologize for this morning, though."
Sokka shakes his head. "You don't have to apologize. I was pushing a topic you clearly wanted to avoid. I should have respected that."
"But I shouldn't have snapped at you the way I did," Polu counters. "I realize I've been doing that a lot lately." He glances at each of his friends in turn. "To all of you. I'm sorry."
"Polu, it's okay. We forgive you." Katara grasps one of Polu's hands.
Aang nods and gently nudges his friend. "We just want to help. Teams work best when they communicate problems they're having."
The prince runs a hand down his face. "I know, I know..." Abusive. Monster. Suffer. Never forgiven. Never enough. "I just don't think this is one of those things I can talk about."
Sokka frowns. "You're sure? We won't judge you, you know."
"I-" Polu lower his voice. "I know, and I appreciate that. I just think this thing is too complicated to explain."
"If you say so," Aang sighs. "You can always change your mind, Po."
The earthbender nods. "I know."
Katara and Aang cross to the other side of the room and bid each other good night.
Sokka and Polu sit in silence for another moment.
Polu does his best not to focus on their shoulders brushing every time one of them takes a breath. He fights off a deep blush when Sokka's hand grazes Polu's knee. Shit, shit, shit.
"Is it too much for you to tell me, even if we're alone?" Sokka's deep whisper sends shudders through Polu's spine. "After everything you told me in that treehouse, I think I could help you figure out whatever's going on."
He's got a point, one voice reasons. He already knows so much, and he hasn't judged you for any of it.
Except when he said you belonged with the firebenders who assaulted you, a darker voice argues.
The first voice counters that. But he said that out of anger! He admitted that he wasn't thinking. You forgave him!
And what would dear old lover-boy think when you tell him how you treated your mother? Right before you disappeared for a hundred years, too. I'm sure he'd love to hear that.
"Polu?" Sokka softly urges.
He'll think you're a monster who abuses his own mother. Who would want to fall in love with a piece of shit like you?
"There's nothing to figure out, I just... I'm not proud of it."
Sokka shrugs lightheartedly. "Hey, I've done plenty of things I'm not proud of. Remember that time I fell into a lake because I thought it was just a big puddle?"
Polu snorts, then covers his mouth upon realizing how loud he was. "I remember it fondly."
"Ha ha," Sokka retorts.
Their shoulders touch again, and Polu's cheeks flare up. Damn it. Stop giving me all these mixed signals.
"If it's something you're not proud of, I promise I won't make any snide comments like I did last time. I'm not gonna do that again," Sokka adds.
"I..." Polu takes a deep breath. "I appreciate it, but it's not a silly kind of not proud. The person who it involves isn't around anymore, so I'd really just like to forget about it."
The prince crawls into his sleeping bag and stares up at Sokka.
The nonbender sighs and nods. "Alright, I get it. Just... please remember that you've got me, now."
"I know," Polu murmurs. "Thanks." He rolls over to hide his rising blush from Sokka.
'I'd like to just forget about it.' Who am I kidding? I'll never forget the reason I became a monster.