everyone comment, more comments about the chapter the more i'll update need to see you're all still here x
Gina eventually grew tired and went to bed, now I was sitting in the kitchen alone debating what to do. Do I stay here and wait for Luke? Or do I simply just go home and carry on with how things are? I was still so angry with Luke. Probably more angry that I should be, I knew Maisy had twisted my thoughts into deep negativity and made me more angry than I should be. But, on the other hand, I was upset. That's how I wanted to feel, not because I love the idea of being upset and drained, not for any dark reason at all, just I would rather be upset than angry? Wouldn't I?
I found myself now contemplating my own emotions in my head, not knowing what to feel, act and what to do about the situation. I mean, I do absolutley love LA and it would't be the worst thing to do. But like Maisy said, if I go, he's won. Or has he? Maybe he just wants me there, well I am sure he wants me there as he expresses it all the time, but then again, why make such a fuss about me coming back to Australia, forcing me to come home, then only a small period of time after that, think it is okay for him to then change his mind and want to rush me back. We wouldn't have had this problem if we had just stayed out there, I had a support group, a friend, a happy home and all of my best friends around me constantly, I was happy, eurgh...this just made me want to go back even more, all I did have here if the boys left me behind is Linsday...who was more than enough of a good reason to stay home, but she had Gina, she has someone here who she can see and enjoy herself with, I had no friends but Maisy here and from what she says, shes staying for good.
Whilst I made up my mind, I made myself another cup of tea. The alcohol was wearing off slowly and my mind started to fall into stress mode. All my worries now rolled back into my mind. I wouldn't have even phased me going back to America, if I hadn't been forced to come home in the first place and if we had been here longer than only a few days and now Luke wanted to leave in just a few more. I felt our relationship just wasn't what it was. A year ago, we laughed, messed around and even things like, dare I say it and sorry to, sex, was something that was constant in our lives, we were a happy, well most of the time unless something went wrong, a loving couple. Don't get me wrong, I am more than happy and in love with Luke than I have ever been, but things just seemed to just constantly be a row or bicker with us. When he was living at home constantly, before America, we were the best Luke and April there ever was.
I turned these thoughts of, I loved Luke and that was that, I obviously did not want to loose him any time soon.
Just as I decided to go home for the night, to have space in my own home and ease my mind with a long sleep, the door went, they were home... well one was anyway, Luke. His keys fell down onto the little table beside the door and his jacket slung over the coat rack, his shoes slipped off and messily thrown with the others he sighed, I could hear he was drunk by the murmers of him speaking to himself came into light. I couldn't bring myself to move, nor go and speak to him whatsoever. Instead I sat and waited, listening to his movements. But he
walked straight into his bedroom and that was that.
I summed up the courage and stood up, walking to his room. As I approached the back of the room, I was met by his beauty, back mucles tensed as his shirt was slowly torn from his body, his hands met his hair as he shook his hands over the curls. "Luke." I whispered, trying not to startle him, which failed as he jumped as he span round, his hand upon his torso as he breathed heavily. "Jesus, you scared the shit out of me."
"Sorry," I said. "I was just about to leave, just before you got here."
He looked at me, confused expressions running through his features, "Why was you here anyway?"
"I came to see your mum."
He nodded lightly. "Okay."
All was silence as we glared at each other, "Okay...See you later." I said as I went to walk out, I felt a hand grip my arm.
"Where are you going?"
"Home?"
"Why?"
"I just thought...I was going to anyway..."
"Stay here." He sighed, "Please. I'm not asking for forgiveness, I just want you to stay."
He walked off to his draws as I didn't reply, he fished out a jumper and some spider man bottoms, which I smirked at quickly. "Here." He said as he threw them to me.
"Luke, I cant stay."
"Why?"
"Because, if I stay, I will stop being angry. I can't stop being angry because then I know I will go to LA."
"I wont go."
"What?"
"If you don't want to go, neither will I."
"I am not expecting you to do that? That's not my intentions here."
"April, I am drunk. I don't even give a shit about going back to LA right now, just get in bed." He said as he sat on the edge of the bed, I sighed and gave up, got changed then sat beside him on the bed too.
"Do you think...do you think we will last another year?"
"Why?" I questioned.
"I want us too, don't get me wrong. Just a question."
"I don't really want to think about that now." I said looking down at my hands.
I felt Luke's warm fingertip tilt my head up, "We will be, won't we? Because, we are Luke and April. I don't fit being just Luke, or Luke and anyone else."
"Luke and Shaniqua goes pretty well." I said, a smirk grew on his face with a small chuckle as his face relaxed and his fingers brought me forward. He kissed my lips ever so lightly, seeing what I would do, when I didn't pull away he became kissing me stronger, his fingers slightly wrapping one side of my neck
and the other on my back, his hand pushing my body towards him.
"Please, don't do this." I said as I leant back.
"Do what?"
"Please don't leave. I started, "When you went to LA and I was here by myself it was the worst feeling I have ever felt."
"Wherever April goes, Luke goes too. That's us, this is us. Luke and April."
"How much do you want me to go to LA?"
"So much, we have a great time out there."
"Why did you force me home then?"
"What do you mean force?"
"You did, Luke. Don't try and say you didn't I wanted to stay. Then all the boys come home with us because they felt so bad, do they even know about this plan to go home?"
He stayed silent for a moment, already knowing his reply. "Beau would get so mad, I couldn't tell him." He said.
"So you decide to just not say anything and then go? Or not say anything and then say last minute?"
He shrugged, not knowing. "I didn't really think this through. I just...you was so happy in LA, I know you're happy here too but when I brought you back I just felt so guilty and thought you would want to leave right away."
I sighed, "No. You brought me back to my family, then when I start feeling happy, you do this."
His next words were cut off by the sound of my phone ringing, I picked it up seeing it was Maisy, I answered.
"Hello." I said.
"Where the fuck are you? I distract everyone so you can get out, I get back to yours and you're not even here?"
"I had to do something," I said looking up at Luke who's frown was glaring at me.
"What? Do what?"
"Don't worry, I'll tell you tomorrow."
"Don't fucking worry, I think I get the hint who you would rather be with. Goodbye." She finished as she hung up.
"I need to go." I said jumping up, Luke grabbed me again.
"Why?"
"Maisy is going mad at me, I have to go."
"Well I'm coming too then, its too dangerous walking around at this time of the night."
I told Luke when I went in he had to wait outside, if me and Maisy was okay, I would let him sleep downstairs but to hide from Maisy. We walked home quickly, Luke demanding he was to come with me even though I had said multiple times it was fine, he kept bringing up the conversation about America that wasn't finished. I kept saying I did not want to speak about it, which he ignored all the way back to when we arrived.
"Wait here." I whispered to Luke, which he nodded to.
He grabbed me and kissed me quickly. "One last kiss, just in case she fucks your head about again."
I ignored his comment and walked up the stairs, shutting the front door behind me. I walked down the hallway as quietly as I could as I heard rummaging in my room, I opened my door to Maisy packing her stuff.
"Maisy?" I said, "Stop!"
She turned round and laughed at me, "No! I'm fucking going, You made me look like a fool at the pub, you ran out and then didn't even fucking wait. THEN you go back to their house to see your fucking stupid boyfriend and not come back to me, you're bestfriend!"
"Please, stop! I'm sorry!" I cried. "I am so sorry, please don't leave again! I don't know when I will see you again!"
"Never! I never want to fucking see you. You have pissed me off so much recently with the fucking sob story about Luke, I gave you fucking advice about it and then you blow it back in my face!"
"I love him."
"And I loved Charlie, but I left him!"
"Its different. Luke doesn't beat me!"
"Well maybe he fucking should, it might knock some sense into you!"
I then began to cry my eyes out, she couldn't run away again. "I promised you I wouldn't leave you yesterday...now you're doing it."
"Its different you fucking deserve it and I don't want to be around you."
"Please don't say that you're drunk."
"No I am not! I fucking miss when you was depressed and suicidal, at least then you fucking listened to people, you cant listen to me when I tell you to stay away from Luke! But you listen to people when they say kill yourself!"
I felt numb as soon as the words came out of her mouth. My body just seemed to freeze. My bedroom door seemed to slam as I turned around and saw Luke storm in a look on his face I never have wanted to see in my life. "Don't you fucking dare! Speak to her like that. Are you fucking sick in the brain? Seriously get the fuck out. I said I would stay out of this but no way are you fucking speaking about her in that way. Don't come back into her life after keeping running away from her and speak to her like that when she was trying to sort out something with someone who is a constant in her life!"
Maisy just laughed at him and I looked at Luke's red angry face, he looked like someone I never wanted to think of again. My dad. His red face was added to the veins popping out under his skin.
"Don't you dare laugh at me. Get out!" He screamed.
Maisy walked up to me and smirked. "Have fun with your aggressive boyfriend."
And with that my lifetime best friend had left. Walked out and probably, but hopefully never to be heard from. Anger flushed over me with her words. I felt Luke's arms wrap around me as I cried. "I had a feeling something might kick off. Sorry for getting involved. You shouldn't have come back."
I silently sob on his shoulder as I pulled away. "She's my best friend."
"No she isn't April. She isn't because best friend's don't say things like that. You have me and the boys, we are your best friends. And we love you more than anyone, ANYONE, has or ever will."
There he was, not the silent one I met the first night I spent in Melbourne with my aunt, not the one who sat in the corner with his headphones in and ignored me until his phone eventually died. This wasn't the Luke who went home and was rude about me to his mum, this was the beautiful boy he really is one year later. Now thinking about how we met and how he really had no intention of even speaking to me, now he was madly and deeply in love with me and I knew it.
"And you all mean the world to me. I am so happy I met you all."
We climbed into bed, now switching houses from his to mine. His legs wrapped into mine as we both sighed. "What a day." I said.
"You feeling any better?"
"Yeah I will be fine, you really reminded me of my dad earlier."
He lifted himself up and lent on his elbow. "Why? Because I got really angry? The difference is, I was sticking up for you, not being the one standing there targeting you, if anyone was like your dad then, it was Maisy."
I nodded, "You're right." I lent up and kissed him again, resuming his kiss that I stopped earlier on, knowing now deep down, we were the same Luke and April, we both ended up like this every time we argued.
His arms grabbed my body as his head rest back down on his pillow, I smiled between the kiss, I was so upset due to what had only happened not even an hour ago, but how could I not be happy that I had the love of my life laying beside me. In this moment, as long as the boys wanted to, I sat and thought. Fuck it, America here we come again.
im trying to do regular updates again :) second update in a week! pls all leave a comment not saying to update just on ideas n stuff! then i will be able to update alot quicker need to see the comments back up!! x love u all