MATEO
"Alpha, the financial reports from last month are ready for your review." Beta Donovan places a pile of papers into the in-tray on my desk. I bite back a heavy sigh and nod silently returning to the spreadsheet on my laptop.
"I'll look at them later today," I dismiss him as I try and work out how I'm going to budget for the security upgrade we desperately need, the new gym equipment Torro wants and the new maternity wing Dr. Santos is begging me for. It's not even eight in the morning and already I want to throw my laptop across the room.
Instead, I look up at Donovan who is still standing in the room looking at me with his dark eyes.
"Was there something else?" I ask tiredly.
"You're going to burn out if you don't give yourself a break. I know you slept in here again if you slept at all."
I glance around my office to the neatly folded sofa bed I had moved in over a year ago after too many nights falling asleep at my desk.
"I slept," Is my only response as I turn back to the spreadsheet, feeling a surge of annoyance as Donovan shifts on his feet but makes no move to leave me the fuck alone so I can finish this budget.
"Donovan do you have anything to say that does not relate to my sleeping, eating, or shitting habits? I'm seriously not interested in your lectures this morning. You're my Beta not my fucking mother."
I see his eyes widen at the power in my tone and he bows his head showing his neck. I catch the faint smile on his face before it disappears.
"Apologies Alpha. There is nothing else but to confirm the arrangements for the Mating Festival are in place. We have twenty-two unmated wolves running this festival, ten of whom are males so we can expect a fairly even number returning if all goes well and everyone finds their mates.
"Okay that's fine, so we won't need to consider extra accommodation this year. If that's all I'll see you at breakfast." I dismiss him again and this time when he does not move I growl my annoyance slamming the desk with my palm.
Donovan doesn't flinch although his neck twists to the side in unavoidable submission to my Alpha power.
"I swear to the Goddess Donovan if you don't get the fuck out of here I will stand you down, what the fuck is it?"
I glare at the older wolf. At twenty-nine he is eight years older than me, originally my brother Sebastian's Beta, but now mine. Almost three years ago Sebastian up and decided to leave Blood Stone to be Co-Alpha with his mate Neo at Crystal Moon. He dropped the Alpha position on my shoulders like lead bricks. I'm still pissed about this, but life moves on I guess.
Beta Donovan and Gamma Torro have been instrumental in my transition training, but the training is long over. I passed my Alpha assessment a year ago and will ascend formally as Alpha after the Council meeting that will be held during the Mating Festival in three days. I'm beyond tired of Donovan and Torro's constant oversight.
For a year now I've pretty much been running the pack as Alpha on my own. I fucking hate this job but like everything else in my life these days I just take the hits as they come.
Donovan looks up.
"I just wanted to say I'm proud of you Alpha Mateo. The pack is doing well, you have everything under control and I look forward to your accession when we get back from the Festival."
I look at him surprised, as he smiles again. Donovan has never been easy with his praise. Far from it. Constantly criticizing my actions and decisions until he had nothing left to critique except my lack of self-care. He looks at me now apologetically.
"I don't mean to mother you, you have achieved your place as Alpha through your own merit. I know how hard you've worked for this and I just want to see you relax a bit and enjoy yourself. Being Alpha is not just all work, you've got plenty of perks too, take advantage of them."
He looks around my office, Sebastian's old office, which I've redecorated. A stark minimalist design, free of distraction and suiting my tastes.
"You haven't had a day off in years and I definitely haven't seen you with any females for a long time. Is everything alright?"
I chuckle to myself while keeping my face composed. It's only taken him three years to work up to this conversation.
"Are you actually worried that I'm not having sex? You were the one who told me to grow up and think of my future mate remember." I spread my arms out wide looking at him pointedly.
Donovan looks at me again with surprise and respect. A small smile on his dark face.
"I never expected you to take me seriously, but I'm glad you did. I hope you meet your mate soon, you are doing the right thing." He nods and finally with a smile he leaves me the fuck alone.
Only when the door closes behind him do I slump in my seat, my back aching from sitting in this fucking chair all night. I lied. I didn't sleep. At all. I run my hands over my tired eyes and face, feeling the stubble on my jaw. I need a shave.
The last few nights have been crazy and I don't know why. More than ever Astrid has been on my mind.
I haven't heard from her since the day I let her go, but I think about her constantly. Xolo hounds her in my dreams every damn night.
It's not the Alpha job that's given me chronic insomnia, it's the fucking girl I let walk away.
If I had known back then that my every waking and sleeping moment would be consumed by the thoughts of one female I never would have let her go.
Fucking mate bond.
I was young and stupid and thought the Goddess had granted me my deepest desire, to be free until I was ready to settle. Little did I know only two weeks later Sebastian would turn my world around, step down as Alpha, and throw me under a bus.
With a frustrated sigh, I browse to Howler on my laptop, clicking on Astrid's profile. She accepted my request to connect the day after we met and I've been able to check in on her from time to time. She's not a prolific Howler user, her posts sporadic at best; in the last three years, I've seen barely a dozen photos. I've memorized each one. My eyes hungered for her bright smile and deep violet eyes.
My favorite photo of hers was taken when she first arrived in Norway. She took a selfie trying to get in some sweeping mountains in the background but the picture is slightly out of focus, the sun is in her eyes and she has the most adorable squint, her violet eyes pale as the light catches the gold flecks in the center.
So fucking beautiful.
My chest squeezes tight, my fingers curling into fists. I force myself to shut down my browser. It's doing me no good. She'll come when she's done with her training and when she does she's never fucking leaving again. I want to spend the rest of my life knowing the girl behind the photos, what makes her smile and laugh, and what makes her cry and get mad. I especially want to know what makes her moan with pleasure. I want to explore every inch of her, finding her weaknesses and exploiting the fuck out of them, turning her into a dripping hot mess for me.
I don't know how virtually overnight I went from wanting to fuck anything on two feet to having my every waking moment focused on one female. I never understood the power of the mate bond until it hit me. I feel like such a fucking fool right now. I can't even believe I've managed to keep this to myself for three damn years.
Tired, hungry and horny, breakfast beckons. I'm about to leave the office when Torro bursts in after a short hard knock. Immediately my senses are on edge as I pick up his unease.
"What is it Torro?" I say walking around my desk, leaning on it as Torro stands with a bow.
"We had an incident at dawn along the border." He begins and I nod.
"Yes, I was linked in. I thought you had it under control?" Torro is excellent at his job as Gamma, our perimeter security is solid apart from the upgrade in cameras and alarms that he wants.
"Yes, I did. We chased off a small group of rogues trying to raid the gardens. Just a group of hungry wolves, or so we thought. To be sure I had Max and Rico follow them off pack grounds to find their base camp so we can keep an eye on them. They are camped about ten miles north, there was a group at the campsite, about thirty rogues, but Rico recognized a few, they are wolves from Alpha Hans's old pack."
I straighten, crossing my arms across my chest as I think the information through.
"Hans's pack was dissolved three years ago, his wolves resettled among minor packs."
Torro nods.
"Yes, but some of his Epsilons went rogue. Rico recognized three of them, and that's not all. He heard them talking. They weren't trying to steal food, that was just a cover, they were looking for someone."
I look up sharply.
"Who?"
"Alpha Neo. For some reason, they thought she was here." Torro's dark brows furrowed with concern. We both remember the last time Hans's pack engaged with Crystal Moon. Neo's father was killed and Sebastian almost died bringing in Hans.
Immediately warning bells resound in my head. I know Sebastian and Neo are visiting the Royal Pack with their three-year-old daughter Quilla. They were called in by the Alpha King a few days ago. Sebastian wanted the trip kept quiet, and apart from me, only their Beta and Gamma at Crystal Moon know where they went.
"Why would they think Neo is here?" Torro asks me, knowing if anyone had the answer I would.
"Because she and Sebastian are not at Crystal Moon," I reply simply, adding nothing further. Torro knows not to ask me more.
"I want you to contact Beta Kiara at Crystal Moon and tell her what happened and what you know, they need to be on alert. Find out if they've had any similar incidents. I'll contact Sebastian and make sure they have enough security traveling back. In the meantime I want a team of warriors watching the rogue camp reporting back their every move and double our perimeter guards."
Torro nods and I see his eyes glaze over as someone links him. He comes out of the link looking at me with furrowed brows.
"What is it?" I ask running my hand through my hair. I haven't even had breakfast and already the day was going to shit.
"The main gate guards just linked in. There's a she-wolf at the gate asking for you. Astrid Paxton, I think that's Alpha Blaze's daughter. I thought she was in Norway?"
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