~•~•~
𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲?
~•~•~
I never imagined that my first kiss would be like this. The night before the Hunger Games. I've never felt such feelings for a boy, maybe because the only boy I'm close to is Gale and he's like a big brother to me. I just haven't thought about relationships, especially since my parents died.
After a few minutes of standing there, I decided to go back to the apartment.
Did Cato really kiss me? It seems unreal to me that boy, who has no idea what love is, kissed my lips a few minutes ago. Did he do it to make me think that he, just like Peeta, likes me? That's probably what he's trying to do, I can't find any other logical explanation. But what's the point of lying to me about that, Cato can easily kill me, he doesn't need to fool me he has feelings for me.
Oh, what the fuck? Now I'll be thinking about all that. Is this his strategy? Me not be able to sleep tonight and that way he kills me in my sleep when we're in the arena? This makes no sense! Cato knows he can kill anyone in any way, there's no reason he's trying so hard for me. How could he put me in such a situation?
I walk into the apartment and the first thing I see is Haymitch sitting on the couch with a drink in his hand. Looks like he decided to drink the night before the Games.
"Here she is! The girl on fire! What were you doing up there with that boy again?" I'm not surprised he knows, but the fact that he speaks loudly, really annoys me.
"And why are you drinking? I thought we agreed not to until the Games begin."
"Yes, as you promised me you wouldn't talk to him again, but here you are! All red, probably from blushing." I roll my eyes.
"You're drunk. You don't know what you're talking about."
"No, I'm not that drunk. Listen, Melanie, I tried, I did, but you're making it harder and harder. I don't know what your relationship is between you two, and I don't want to know either, but I'm sure that whatever happens in the arena, you won't get a happy ending. I promise you." Haymitch says.
It wasn't the nicest thing to hear. I don't understand why he's telling me that, he's probably still mad at me because of earlier. Well, I better not think so much about his words.
"I know you tried, Haymitch. I appreciate it. Good night." I don't want my last relationship with him to be bad. There's no point in making enemies at this stage, I won't win anything like that.
I go to my room to try to get some sleep. I know this will be very difficult to do, considering what happened a few minutes ago and that the Hunger Games start tomorrow. Just thinking about it makes me sick, I don't want to go through this.
I see that the door to Peeta's room is open and out of pure curiosity, I decide to see if he is there too. I see him sitting by the window and looking through it as if that calms him down. I tell myself that I have to go to him to apologize.
"Hey," I say.
"Hey." He turns to me.
"It'll be good if you get some sleep."
"I don't want to miss the celebration. It's for us, after all." I can't disagree with him. All these people can't wait to see us tomorrow. "Aren't you going to go to sleep?"
"I wish, but I'm unlikely to be able to. I keep wondering what will happen tomorrow." I admit. For a second I wonder how Cato'll be able to sleep with all this in mind, but the thought is quickly put out of my mind.
"I don't think I can either. I keep thinking things." There is a slightly awkward silence after that. I'm not sure what to say to him, I don't know if we even need to talk. I shouldn't leave it like this, I don't want Peeta to hate me in our last days of life.
"I'm sorry about earlier. That I yelled at you, I shouldn't have reacted that way."
"Don't worry, it doesn't matter anymore. I know I have no chance of winning."
"Don't talk like that." I feel a little bad for Peeta for thinking this way. Did he really accept that he is going to die?
"Why not? It's true. At least I want to die like myself. Does this make sense?" I shake my head. How can anyone die as anyone but themselves? "I don't want them to change me there. To turn me into some mutt."
I feel terrible, like the most selfish person in the world. While I was making plans to beat everyone, Peeta wanted to keep himself as he was, before the Games.
"You're saying that you won't kill anyone?" I ask.
"No, I'm sure when the time comes I'll kill, just like everyone else. I can't surrender without a fight. I just wish I could think of a way to... show the Capitol that they don't own me. That I am more than just a pawn in these Games." I can't figure out exactly what he's trying to say. A pawn? None of us are pawns, everyone decides how to play the game in their way.
"I can't afford to think that way."
"Leave it. Don't overthink it, these are just my thoughts. You don't have to understand me, I just needed someone to tell it to. And maybe one day you'll figure out what I meant."
"We'll find out in time," I say.
~•~
At night I drift off into a nap, then I wake up again. I constantly think about how in the arena the true faces of all of us will be revealed, everyone will see who we are. Peeta and his words may just turn out to be a role he's been playing in front of me and Haymitch all along. And Cato... I'm not sure if I want to know who the real him is.
I can't let myself think about the kiss. Not because I don't want to, but because it's better for me. Who knows what's going on in his head, it could be a trap to think he has feelings for me. Even though I don't know what to feel, I don't want to think of things that will turn out to be wrong.
After these thoughts, I drift off once more.
~•~
In the morning, the first thing I do is eat as much as I can. My body doesn't like this, because all this stress makes me feel like I'm going to throw up. But I still decide to think sensibly and eat all my breakfast, because who knows when my next meal will be.
Cinna comes to me and gives me a simple dress to wear. My Hunger Games outfit is waiting for me in the catacombs below the arena. I feel sick just thinking about it.
To get to the arena itself, we need to get into a hovercraft that will fly there. Haymitch is with me to see me off. I'm surprised he didn't pick Peeta to take to the hovercraft, I thought he liked him more than me.
"Remember what I told you. Don't light a fire under any circumstances, it's an easy way for them to find you. Try to find water at the beginning, and if you have a chance, find food too. Don't trust anyone." He looks me in the eye. "Understand?"
"Mhm" I can't speak, I find it too difficult. My stomach hurts from the worry that's pressing on me. I don't want to go there.
"They'll put all kinds of stuff right in the mouth of the Cornucopia. There'll be a bow, but don't go for it. It's a bloodbath, they're trying to pull you in, that's not your game." I nod. Every year, the most tributes die this way. I will take the bow another way.
"Melanie. You can do this."
"Thanks." He believes in me. I see it in his eyes and I understand that he is not lying to me. For the first time since I've been here, I'm sure someone is telling me the truth.
I'm heading for the hovercraft and I can already feel my legs shaking. How am I supposed to run?
Inside, all the tributes are seated without having the opportunity to stand up. A woman walks around with a white apron and a syringe in her hand. Now what is this?
"Give me your hand." She tells me.
"What's that?" I ask and she grabs my hand. The needle pokes something into my arm and it makes me uncomfortable. It's not much fun getting your arm stabbed.
"Your tracking chip." Now the gamemakers will always know exactly where I am in the arena.
I look at the others. I'm sitting next to Cato's district partner: Clove. I remembered her name from the interview yesterday, I hadn't tried to remember the names of the tributes. She looks like she's having a lot of fun being here, she can't wait to get out into the arena. I also see Peeta who, like me, looks stressed. I don't want to meet his eyes, I'm not sure I want to look at him.
My eyes fall on the boy with the golden hair. He looks around and his eyes sweep through all the tributes until they land on mine. He gives me a shy smile that I've never seen before. My eyes look at his lips for a moment and almost immediately return to his eyes.
The woman in the white coat walks up to him and grabs his arm to put the tracking device. I can see Cato tensing his muscles as the needle inserts the chip into his arm, but he's not making the faces I was making.
This is the last time I pay attention to Cato and then I decide to don't be distracted anymore by him.
~•~
The flight lasts about thirty minutes, and then the windows darken, suggesting that we are approaching the arena. The hovercraft lands and I head into an underground tunnel right into the catacombs that lie beneath the arena. I follow the directions and arrive at my designated place - a room where my preparation will take place.
I see Cinna and that calms me somewhat. He hands me the clothes I'll be wearing all the time. They are the same for all tributes. They are a V-neck shirt, with a black jacket, olive cargo pants, and brown buckle boots.
"The fabric of the jacket is designed to reflect body heat. Cold nights await you" Cinna says. Great. I'll probably freeze to death.
Cinna takes out of his pocket the bracelet Layla gave me when she said goodbye to me. He puts it on my arm, under my jacket.
"Thank you, Cinna." That's the longest sentence I've said today. I can't believe that in a few minutes, everything will start. Nervousness turns to dread as I anticipate what lies ahead. I could be dead, completely dead, in an hour. And even after less.
"I'm not allowed to bet, but if I could, I'd bet on you." He says and kisses my cheek. He puts his forehead to mine and I start to tremble.
"20 seconds." An unfamiliar voice calls out.
I stand where I should be and then a glass cylinder descends around me. It begins to rise and for a few seconds, I'm in complete darkness. Where the hell am I? Suddenly I see a bright light that blinds my eyes. I still don't know where I am.
After a few seconds of trying to focus on my vision, I finally see what the place is. It's a forest!
"Ladies and gentlemen, the Seventy-Fourth Hunger Games begin!"
xoxo.
~AN~
Hiii! I'm so happy that I finish the first part of this book and now the interesting part begins!
Tell me how are you feeling and what are your thoughts about the future parts.
Best wishes!