Daylight was beginning to creep over the horizon, casting a warm glow across the planet. It had only been an hour since the fight had ended, but it felt like it had been longer.
I sat on the forest floor with my legs crossed under me. My eyes were shut as I took in deep breaths. Ahsoka Tano sat across from me. Din had returned to the ship to check up on the child, we had left him there last night during the fight so he would be safe.
After all the chaos that had ensued last night, this moment felt peaceful. I felt my soul calming, my nervous system relaxing and my muscles easing. Whether that was due to the force or not, I do not know.
I cracked my eyes open and looked over at Ahsoka. She too had her eyes closed and her legs crossed. There was a question I had been wanting to ask her, but I didn't want to interrupt her meditation. I debated it for a moment before I decided to speak up.
"Ahsoka?" I asked gently, trying not to startle her.
"Yes?" She asked without even opening her eyes.
I almost stopped myself from asking the question, feeling like it seemed stupid. "How do you jump so high?"
Ahsoka's face broke out into an amused smile and she opened her eyes to look at me. "I use the force to project myself upwards. Jedi can also use the force to slow themselves down when falling from a high altitude...when I was a padawan, I used to jump out of gunships without a jetpack." She had hesitated before talking about her past, it must be understandably painful for her.
I raised my eyebrows in amazement. "Wow. That's amazing, isn't that scary?"
"Not when you know it won't hurt." Ahsoka replied with a kind smile.
I nodded in response as I thought about her words. Thinking about different ways I could test that out and learn to control my fall.
"Can I ask you a question?" Ahsoka asked, breaking me out of my slightly reckless thoughts
"Of course." I replied, giving her my full attention.
"What is your relationship with Din Djarin?" She asked, her gaze was curious and almost scrutinising. I fought to keep my expression neutral.
"We're...we're just friends. Why?" I asked, completely caught off guard. We are just friends, aren't we? Sure we technically look after a child together, but that didn't mean anything.
Ahsoka raised her brow, I could tell she didn't quite believe me. "Just friends don't share a Keldabe kiss."
"A what?" I asked in confusion
"You don't know?" Ahsoka asked in amusement
"What is it?" I asked again. Progressively getting more confused.
"In Mandalorian culture, mandalorians press their foreheads together as a sign of affection. And as a substitute for kissing. Hence the name." Ahsoka said in amusement
I sat there in a stunned silence as I took in the words. A mandalorian form of kissing. I had no idea. I mean, of course I didn't. All that I know about Mandalorian culture is what I've learned from Din. We've done that three times now and I didn't think too much about it. But now that I knew, it made sense. He can't remove his helmet, so how would he...kiss someone.
Ahsoka's lips twitched up slightly at my stunned silence. She was watching me for my reaction but I hardly took notice. It felt like an electric shock tingled down my spine and butterflies erupted in my stomach when it finally set it. That Din was doing this part of Mandalorian culture with me. The burning question I had right now was why? Did he feel the same way I did?
"You really didn't know." Ashoka mused.
I shook my head gently. "No, I didn't." What else did I not know about the things he does?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The large main doors slowly slid open. The villagers were cheering excitedly behind us as we prepared to leave. They had been celebrating now that they were free of the magistrate, it felt like a completely different place. The people were happier, life had been brought back into their home.
Din was on my left side, his pauldron occasionally brushed against my shoulder. I felt like I was hyper aware of his presence. I was trying my best to not seem suspicious around him but it was surprisingly difficult. I couldn't stop thinking about the keldabe kiss. It felt so intimate in the moment and now I know why.
"I believe this was your payment." Ahsoka said as she held out the beskar spear.
"No. I can't accept. I didn't finish the job." Din stated
Ahsoka gave him a look and held the spear further out to him. "No. But this belongs to a Mandalorian."
Din looked at the spear hesitantly before he reached out and took it. He wrapped his gloved hand firmly around the beskar spear.
"Where is your little friend?" Ahsoka asked
"Back at the ship. Wait here, I'll go get him." Din stated.
"I'll come with you." I spoke up. He nodded to me and the both of us began the walk back to the razor crest.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A twig snapped gently under my boot as I walked through the dead forest. Every now and then I would glance to my right at Din. A million thoughts were racing through my mind as I thought about what Ahsoka had told me. A keldabe kiss. Every now and then, I felt a rush of confidence willing me to ask him about it. But as fast as it appeared, it dissipated and left me in fear. Fear of what he might say in response. That it won't be what I want him to say.
I glanced over at him again briefly, taking in a deep breath like I was about to say something, before I exhaled and looked forwards again. I don't think I'll ever be able to ask him.
Din sighed gently beside me and I almost jumped. My senses were feeling strangely heightened around him.
"What is it, Cyar'ika." He asked me. My heart jolted in my chest at the sound of his voice. And that name, another mandalorian thing that I didn't understand. What did it even mean?
"Nothing. I'm fine." I said unconvincingly.
Din gently but playfully pushed his shoulder against mine, trying to make me relax. "Come on, I know you. What's wrong?"
I took in a deep breath. My throat felt like it was being constricted as I tried to think of what to say. How do I word this? Tell him I know about the mandalorian tradition he's been doing. That I don't want him to stop.
"It's...Ahsoka..." I sighed as I trailed off. My mouth didn't seem to be cooperating with my brain anymore.
"What about her?" Din asked gently. He stopped walking and turned to me, giving me his full attention. He probably thought it was something Jedi related.
I took in another deep breath in a final attempt to chase away my fear and doubt. "She told me about a mandalorian tradition."
Din's helmet tilted to the side in confusion. I had to fight off the thoughts about how cute it made him look. "What tradition?" He enquired, curiosity thick in his voice.
"A Keldabe kiss." I finally allowed the words to leave my mouth. I held my breath as I watched for any reaction. His entire being seemed to freeze up at my words. His muscles tensed and his shoulders broadened more than usual.
"What did she tell you?" His voice was tense, on edge. It was like he was waiting for me to attack him.
"That it's a Mandalorian way of kissing. To put their foreheads together." I said, my voice was quiet as I finally let the reality of it sink in.
Din turned his head to look away from me. Aiming his visor over my shoulder. He seemed to grow even more tense and to be honest, it didn't look like he was breathing. I felt myself grow worried at his response. The urge to comfort him was stronger than my anxiety.
I lowered my hand down and took a hold of his own. The familiar rough leather against my fingers brought me a small amount of comfort. When my hand wrapped around his, he looked back down at me again. He gently squeezed my hand and let out a heavy breath.
"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked him, voice barely above a whisper.
"I don't...if..." he stumbled over his words and shook his helmet gently. "It happened on accident at first, when I thought you had drowned. And I knew that I should tell you but...if you didn't feel the way I did then I couldn't risk losing you. You are everything to me." Din's voice shook ever so slightly as he lay his soul bare for me to have. Placing his heart in my hands and praying that I wouldn't break it. My gaze softened as I squeezed his hand gently.
"You're everything to me too, Din." I said gently. I watched his reaction closely. His muscles finally relaxed and he let out a sigh of relief. He squeezed my hand gently before he let go.
I frowned ever so slightly at the loss of contact, but I watched intently as his left hand reached over to his right and gently began to tug off his leather glove. I watched with widened eyes as the leather glove slipped off of his hand. His hand was large and tanned, it had very few scares or calluses due to the fact that he always had gloves on. He lowered his hand back down and I watched with bated breath as his fingers twitched towards mine.
He reached forwards and his skin brushed against mine. My heart jolted in my chest and I tried to stop my hands from shaking as he gently took a hold of my own. I felt slightly dizzy as his fingers wrapped around my own and our palms pressed together. Din let out a shaky breath as our skin touched for the first time. His hand was warm and comforting. I don't think a childish crush can be used to explain how I feel anymore.
He tilted his head forward and pressed it gently against my own. The meaning of this gesture has completely changed now. I let out a shaky sigh as I gently closed my eyes. I didn't need to see his face to know that his eyes were closed as well.
His thumb gently began to rub back and forth across the back of my hand. I reveled in the feeling of his skin against my own, I never wanted to let go. I wanted to stay in this moment with him forever, to forget about the perils of the universe and be held by him forever.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The rusted ramp of the crest slowly lowered down onto the forest floor. My thumb was gently rubbing back and forth against Din's leather glove, the texture of the material was strangely calming to me. Din had put his glove back on but he hadn't let go of my hand. My lips twitched upwards slightly when I thought about what had just happened, but the smile quickly dropped.
Regardless of how happy I felt, I couldn't help but worry. We had basically confessed our feelings to one another and yet, I would still have to leave him soon. It was rather tragic that we only figured it out now, when we would be leaving each other.
Din and I walked wordlessly up the ramp into the hull. The door was open and the child was laying in his hammock. Din's pace slowed as he entered the hull, his gaze locked onto Grogu, who was sleeping peacefully.
The two of us walked on quiet feet up to his room. Din gingerly placed his right hand on the edge of the hammock. He gently gave it a light shake to try and wake him.
"Wake up, buddy. It's time to say goodbye." Din said gently. His hand tightened around my own when he said goodbye. I squeezed his back gently, My heart breaking in my chest.
Grogu cooed and cracked his eyes open. He sleepily tried to wake up but his eyes kept closing again. I smiled fondly at him. Din gently released my hand and wrapped both of his gently around Grogu. He picked him up and turned around, sitting himself down on the edge of his bed.
Din couldn't take his eyes off of the small child. Even without being able to see his face, I could tell that he was looking at him with fondness. It was in the way that he gently cradled him in his arms. I smiled sadly but fondly at the two of them as I perched myself on the bed beside him.
I lent my head against Din's shoulder and wrapped my arm around his. Din let out a heavy sigh as he looked between the two of us. A moment of understanding past between the two of us. Neither one of us wanted to leave the other. I reached out with my free hand and gently stroked the child's ear.
The three of us sat in silence, embracing this moment. It could be the last time in a long time that we will be together, but this absence will not last. It won't be the last time we are together, I'll make sure of it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I sighed with a sad smile as I watched Din and Grogu. He had sat the child down on a crate as he fused over his clothes, he gently rolled up his sleeves to make sure they weren't covering his hands.
I pushed myself up from the end of Din's bed and walked over to stand beside him. He gently picked up the child and turned to face me.
"Are you ready?" He asked, I could hear the sadness in his tone and it broke my heart into several pieces.
"Yeah." I nodded gently. I was lying to him though, I wasn't ready to leave him. I don't think I ever would be.
He nodded silently to me and turned to walk out of the hatch. I followed after him and was surprised to see Ahsoka standing in front of the ship's ramp.
"You're like a father to him." Ahsoka said to Din, he looked up from Grogu in surprise, having been too distracted by the child to notice her.
"I cannot train them." Ahsoka said, causing Din to freeze in his tracks. I stopped behind him and felt a rush of mixed emotions. Half of me was happy to get the chance to stay with Din, while the other half felt disappointment. An emotion that surprised me.
"You made me a promise, and I held up my end." Din stated.
Ahsoka sighed and took a couple of steps forward until she was standing in front of us. She looked down at Grogu and held her hand up. He wrapped his small hand around her index finger.
"There is one possibility. Go to the planet Tython. You will find the ancient ruins of a temple that has a strong connection to the force. Place Grogu on the seeing stone at the top of the mountain." Ahsoka explained
"Then what?" Din asked
"Then Grogu may choose his own path. If he reaches out through the force, there's a chance a Jedi may sense his presence and come searching for him. Then again, there aren't many Jedi left." Ahsoka explained. Grogu made a small, sad noise and dropped his ears.
"Thank you." Din said
"May the force be with you." Ahsoka said. Din nodded and began to walk up the ramp. Ahsoka then held her hand out and gently held my own. We shared a look of understanding before she gently let go.
"Thank you, Ahsoka." I said
Ahsoka nodded to me gently with a smile. I hesitantly turned away from her and began to walk up the ramp. I felt a strange sense of relief. At this moment, I had more time with Din. The probability of me leaving him is more uncertain than it was before. And even if I do have to go, at least it won't be today.