Hi guys! I am so sorry it took me this long to translate this chapter. It's a big one.
Let's get to it!
(ps - thank you all so much for the amazing responses, the kind comments and all the love you guys give me! I appreciate it so much 🤍)
--
"You can decorate absence however you want, but you're still gonna feel what's missing." - Siobhan Vivian
Maybe this Time - Chapter Six
Ceylin looked around nervously and once again studied the apprehension on the faces of those present.
Eren anxiously bit his nails. Right next to the commissioner, Umut seemed just as agitated, repeatedly tapping one leg. Opposite both guys, Melis paced back and forth in the hospital corridor, too tense to sit down.
Ceylin inhaled deeply and let her breath out slowly.
So much had happened in the last few hours that it was hard to know how to start processing her emotions.
Ilgaz had been stabbed in the abdomen earlier that afternoon as they tried to escape Lira headquarters. The lawyer vividly remembered her desperation when she'd noticed the growing bloodstain on the prosecutor's shirt.
Fortunately, the laceration had been limited to the skin and subcutaneous tissue, so the blade hadn't reached any vital organs. But they still needed to take Ilgaz to the hospital where Ceylin now waited for an update on the prosecutor's condition.
Her clothes were stained with his blood, but nothing would convince the lawyer to leave unless she saw with her eyes that Ilgaz was doing okay and his life wasn't in danger.
Ceylin had called Eren as soon as they'd arrived in the emergency room. The commissioner had driven there as fast as he could, stopping only to pick up Melis on the way. Ceylin knew Eren had new developments on the case to share, but he'd insisted on keeping those to himself until he could discuss them with the prosecutor.
When Ilgaz's doctor approached them in the waiting room, Ceylin stood up abruptly but relaxed a little when she saw in the man's face that he had good news to share. Her first impulse was to ask if she could see the patient, but she barely had time to formulate her question. After informing everyone that Ilgaz was fine and his life was not in danger, the doctor revealed that the patient had requested to see Eren.
Ceylin sank back into her chair and crossed her arms, unsure how to act next. She didn't know if they would let her see Ilgaz. His family was likely arriving at any moment, and judging by Melis's nervousness as she bit her nails, the teacher would probably want to stay with the prosecutor to take care of him.
Feeling nauseated at the thought of Melis caring for Ilgaz and showering him with affection, Ceylin looked away instantly. Her eyes then met Umut's. The moment they did, the police officer quickly lowered his gaze to his lap.
Ceylin frowned, intrigued.
What the hell was Umut hiding? Why did he look so tense?
If the lawyer had time to mull it over, she probably could have come up with half a dozen different reasons, but Eren interrupted her thoughts when he returned to the waiting room with a hint of a smile. Ceylin studied her friend, noticing a mix of relief, pride, and satisfaction on his face.
"Ilgaz wants to see you," he revealed, facing the two women present.
When Melis stepped towards the commissioner, ready to go meet the prosecutor, Eren gently stopped her.
"I'm sorry, Melis. I was referring to Ceylin."
The lawyer could practically feel the tension buzzing in the air as she grabbed her purse and followed Eren down the corridor. Ceylin didn't bother turning around to face Melis because she knew her face would reveal the whole truth. She didn't feel the least bit guilty about usurping the chance to see Ilgaz from the other woman, nor would she apologize for it.
The moment they were outside the hearing range of the waiting room, Ceylin turned to her friend.
"Eren! What's going on?" The lawyer asked, hastily pacing to keep up with her friend. "Is Ilgaz okay? Why does he want to see me?"
"Ilgaz is fine, yes," Eren assured her with a kind smile, "let him tell you himself why he wants to see you."
Ceylin was suspicious of the enigmatic expression on the commissioner's face before she knocked twice on the door of Ilgaz's room. The lawyer turned the knob as soon as she heard the prosecutor's voice from inside.
"Ilgaz," Ceylin sighed slowly after seeing the prosecutor's figure in the bed. He looked a little paler than usual, but he was sitting up and had an overall good appearance. "How do you feel?"
The prosecutor smiled, unable to express how happy he was to see her. Ilgaz wanted to say that he was feeling much better now that Ceylin was there, but he had to hold back his words.
"I'm fine," he assured her, "it was just a scrape."
Ceylin tilted her head at the same time she narrowed her eyes in disapproval.
"You needed seven stitches," the lawyer pointed out, moving forward to stop him when Ilgaz motioned to leave the bed, "don't even think about it. You need to rest."
"I'll have all the time in the world to rest when all of this is over," he insisted, rising to his feet despite her vehement objections. "For now, we can't waste any more time, Ceylin," the prosecutor sighed heavily before looking into her eyes. "Listen, I am going to brief you on the case, but you can't question me at every step, okay?"
"What are you talking about?" Ceylin frowned.
"Eren was here with an update on the case of the dirty cartel," Ilgaz shared. "He knew I was heading to Lira's headquarters to interrogate the directors. Before we left the building, I had already sent him the description of the two guys who were following you, and Eren was on his way to meet me there. While you were helping me get in the car and driving me to the hospital, Eren was able to arrest the guy who tried to escape," Ilgaz revealed expectantly.
Ceylin couldn't contain her excitement.
"You mean the huge gorilla who stabbed you?" She asked, elated. Upon seeing Ilgaz's non-verbal confirmation, Ceylin couldn't help cheering, "that's wonderful news!"
"He attempted to murder a prosecutor, so we have more than good enough reason to arrest him," Ilgaz held Ceylin's shoulders, determined to contain her enthusiasm as there were still many things to share. "After Eren took him to the police station, we confiscated his cell phone. There was a lot of useful evidence in it. It was possible to trace some of his contacts as well. We have several search warrants being issued by the judge on the case as we speak."
"I can't believe it!" Ceylin cheered, ecstatic. She could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. However, what caught her attention was the fact that Ilgaz didn't seem to share her excitement. "What?" The lawyer stepped back, examining his grave expression, "what are you not telling me?"
"Ceylin," Ilgaz took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He hated being in that position. The truth would undoubtedly hurt the woman in front of him, but he couldn't hide anything from her, nor did he want to. "There's something else I have to tell you," the prosecutor gently guided the lawyer to the hospital bed and made her sit on it. Ilgaz hid a grimace of pain when he sat down to face her.
He then spent the following minutes sharing what he'd discovered about the two lawyers who had occupied Ceylin's position before her.
"You're telling me that...?" Ceylin looked completely shocked as she reached the same conclusion Ilgaz had. "They tricked me all along?" The lawyer rose to her feet, furious. "The entire time I spent working for Tigris thinking I was doing honest work was nothing but a lie?"
"Yes," Ilgaz confirmed, crestfallen. He waited in silence for a few seconds, allowing the lawyer to process the harsh reality of that discovery. "I requested the exhumation of one of the lawyers' body, Ceylin. Umut brought the forensic report to Eren just now," the prosecutor confided. Under normal circumstances, he wouldn't share those details with someone who wasn't officially part of the investigation, but it was important not only that Ceylin understood the risks she was taking but also that she knew the whole truth about how her good intentions had been taken advantage of. "The body of the second lawyer was almost fully decomposed, but the skeleton told us what we needed to know. There was a mark in his breastbone matching a bullet wound," Ilgaz noticed how Ceylin processed everything he was saying. Each word he spoke seemed to horrify her even more.
"They killed him," the lawyer reached the right conclusion. "They shot in the chest and covered it up, making it look like a heart attack."
"Exactly," Ilgaz sighed, sympathizing with her pain.
He could clearly distinguish the many emotions overwhelming Ceylin at that moment. There was anger, indignation, remorse, and, he suspected, a share of guilt she didn't deserve to feel.
"All the lawsuits I won... All the companies I helped them bring down," Ceylin shook her head in denial. "Are you really telling me this was only a political game? Was I used as a pawn by these people?"
"You didn't know," Ilgaz assured her, loathing the image of her tortured face, "it wasn't your fault, Ceylin."
The lawyer nodded, but the way she touched her throat as her eyes filled with tears let Ilgaz know that, emotionally, Ceylin would still need some time to get over that reality.
"What about now?" Her voice sounded slightly cracked, "what do we do now?"
Despite the physical pain he still felt in his abdomen, Ilgaz wanted more than anything to hold her.
"We wait," the prosecutor stated patiently, "the prosecution in Ankara is already on the case, and they've been updated with everything we found out. As I said, investigations are ongoing. It's only a matter of time before we catch those responsible for your kidnapping, Ceylin. They will answer for the crimes they've committed, and you won't have to worry about your safety anymore," Ilgaz stated assuringly.
The way Ceylin merely consented in silence was a testament to how shaken she still was.
"Having said that... there is something else we need to get to," Ilgaz stated emphatically, furtively glancing at his surroundings.
Ceylin was surprised when Ilgaz moved away from her to lock the two metal doors in the room after lowering the plastic curtains, still completely silent.
Ilgaz could see why she was finding everything strange. They were in one of the patient accommodations inside the emergency room, so it was likely that someone in the medical staff would eventually return to check on him. There was also the fact that Melis and Eren were waiting outside, and they both knew he was alone with Ceylin. The prosecutor was well aware of the wrong impression that could leave, especially if their private meeting lasted much longer.
"Ilgaz, what are you doing...?" Ceylin studied his movements. She widened her eyes when she noticed he'd taken a metal tray from one of the drawers. "What's going on?" The lawyer asked with a higher pitch than usual.
"I don't have a lot of time to explain. I locked the doors, but someone might try to come in anytime. I'm going to need you to trust me," Ilgaz's eyes met Ceylin's, and the intensity of his gaze took her breath away. His voice sounded hoarse when he asked, "do you trust me, Ceylin?"
The lawyer felt the impact of the words Ilgaz had almost whispered. She felt magnetized, unable to look away.
"I do."
"Then you need to do as I say," Ilgaz said decisively before he looked over his shoulder one last time to ensure no one was near. "Take off all your clothes."
"WHAT?"
"Shhh," Ilgaz stopped her from making a fuss. Despite the urgency of the situation, he was amused by the expression of utter indignation on the lawyer's face. "I promise it's not what it looks like."
Ceylin gaped at him. Ilgaz couldn't possibly be serious.
She remained silent, waiting for the moment he would confess it was all a joke. But the prosecutor's air of serenity as he looked deeply into her eyes without even blinking told Ceylin that he'd meant every word.
"I can't believe I am doing this," Ceylin grumbled, hastily unbuttoning her light jacket. "I hope you have a good reason to ask this of me, Ilgaz Kaya, or else..."
"You'll see," Ilgaz silenced her again, focused.
The prosecutor narrowed his eyes, studying Ceylin's body language in search of clues. As he thoroughly scanned her with his eyes, Ilgaz tried to ignore his own reactions to the sight of that beautiful, feminine body that was gradually being exposed to him.
He felt his pulse racing when Ceylin tentatively unbuttoned her pants and slid them down her legs. She looked apprehensive when she turned her back to him before tugging at the hem of her shirt and pulling it over her head.
The lawyer now stood in front of him only in her underwear. For a second, Ilgaz lost the battle with his own instincts and just stared at her, completely mesmerized by her beauty. It wasn't until she turned to face him with her cheeks flushed that the prosecutor finally snapped back to reality.
"I am sure this is enough," she glared at him, disapproving of Ilgaz's momentary lapse of judgment. "You still haven't told me what this is all about."
"Come here," Ilgaz gently guided her by the shoulders to the patient bed in the room.
The prosecutor made sure the railings were securely down on both sides before he looked into Ceylin's eyes to finally enlighten her.
"When we were leaving the bathroom in Lira's building, you also noticed that those two guys seemed to be following your location, right?"
"Yes," Ceylin scowled, unsure what Ilgaz was getting at. "They seemed to be checking something on their phones the entire time."
"Exactly," Ilgaz approved of how she easily kept up with his thinking. "A few days ago, when you first told me about how these men seemed to randomly appear in your surroundings, I suspected they might be tracking you," he explained, seeing Ceylin's face transform as she processed the information.
"My cell phone," the lawyer widened her eyes, looking both shocked and angry for not realizing it sooner. "They must have bugged my phone."
"It was the first thing I thought of," Ilgaz explained. "That's why I had your device checked."
Ceylin frowned, annoyed.
"You stole my phone?"
"I didn't steal it; I merely had it checked out remotely," Ilgaz shrugged.
"So you hacked into my phone?" Ceylin rephrased her accusation, making her objection pretty clear.
Ilgaz didn't answer, but his face looked adorably flushed.
A while back, as soon as he'd suspected something, the prosecutor had the two best technicians in the police IT department sector look into Ceylin's phone for any indications that it could have been modified.
"Don't worry, I didn't see any of your personal data," Ilgaz assured her. "I just had the techs make sure you weren't being tracked. After they said your phone was clean, for a while I convinced myself that my theory was wrong. But today, when we were in that bathroom, I realized my initial guess was right. I was just looking for proof in the wrong place."
"What do you mean?" Ceylin bit her lower lip, annoyed at the riddles Ilgaz sometimes used to communicate.
"I mean this," the prosecutor gently laid her down on the bed, having Ceylin rest the side of her head and upper body on the mattress while her legs remained on the floor. The lawyer sucked in her breath when she felt Ilgaz's presence behind her, but it wasn't until his hands closed around the side of her hips that she let out a muffled sound through her teeth. "I realized that if they really wanted to keep track of your every move, there would be no point in bugging a device that could be replaced, or worse, given to someone else," Ilgaz lowered his voice as he slowly slid one hand to the small of Ceylin's back, carefully examining the curves of her spine.
His thumbs lightly kneaded the area just below the two dimples in her lower back. Ceylin had to hide her face in the mattress to contain the groan that escaped her lips.
Everything about that interaction was compromising - starting with their position, the clothes scattered around the room, and her attraction for the man behind her. If the context were any different, Ceylin might even imagine that Ilgaz was giving her a sensual massage.
It certainly wouldn't be the first time, the lawyer told herself, overwhelmed by a heat wave that shot through her body, straight to her lower abdomen.
She gasped loudly when she felt the gentle touch of Ilgaz's fingers slowly tracing up her spine. Suddenly, it seemed that the mere act of breathing demanded a lot of effort, especially when the prosecutor stood so close behind her and the warmth of his hands infiltrated her skin as if invisible sparks radiated as a result of that intimate, personal touch...
"I belatedly realized that, in this context..." Ilgaz brushed the tip of his finger on the curve of Ceylin's waist before resuming his previous upward path, "the smartest thing to do would be to ensure you could never get rid of the tracker," Ceylin could practically feel his heavy breaths on the nape of her neck when he reached the spot between her shoulder blades. "And what better way to do that than by putting something in your body, somewhere your hands couldn't reach?" Ilgaz finalized, elucidating why he'd started the search on her back.
Ceylin stopped breathing completely when Ilgaz unexpectedly unclasped her bra. Due to her position, the straps slipped slightly down her arms, but as she remained lying down, the front of her torso wasn't exposed.
Ilgaz really needed to get that over with, or else...
"Ouch!" Ceylin complained when she felt a sharp pain in a specific spot Ilgaz had just explored. An unexpected outcome to the course of her thoughts.
"Does it hurt right here?" Ilgaz moved his fingertip back to the last spot he'd touched but didn't press it against her skin this time.
"Yes," Ceylin grimaced in discomfort. "They beat me up when I was kidnapped, and my back was pretty sore for a while. That particular spot hurt the most."
"Right here between your shoulder blades?" Ilgaz questioned with a heavy breath.
In a split second, Ceylin picked up on what Ilgaz was trying to say. She turned her head over her shoulder and met his smoldering gaze.
"Exactly there," the lawyer gasped.
Ilgaz gently kneaded the skin in the area she'd referred, taking as much care as possible not to hurt her. It took him a few seconds, but finally, he could make out a small lump with a stiff consistency and oval shape under her skin.
Ilgaz then went to the opposite side of the room and returned with the metal tray that Ceylin had seen him with earlier.
"What are you going to do with that?" The lawyer's eyes widened in fear.
"This is the tray the surgeon used to suture my wound," Ilgaz explained patiently. "Don't worry, everything he used has been properly disposed of. The things we'll need are still sterilized."
"Ilgaz, don't..." Ceylin pleaded, realizing what he intended to do.
She got up abruptly, moving away from the bed. When Ceylin realized she was completely naked from the waist up, she crossed her arms in front of her chest, but it seemed to her that an urgent sense of modesty was the least of her problems at that moment.
"Ceylin, pay attention to what I'm saying," Ilgaz dropped the tray on the bed and cradled her face between his hands. "Every second you spend resisting is one more second we give these bastards a chance to set up an ambush for you when you leave this place. They already know you're here," the prosecutor failed to realize he was stroking her cheek with his thumb in an unconscious attempt to soothe her. "We don't have any more time to waste. If we go see a doctor, they'll have us fill out forms, and we'll have to wait in the crowded emergency room until someone comes to see you. Anyone with a slightly more serious condition will be admitted before you. The whole process could take hours," the prosecutor pointed out. Given Ceylin's excellent health, she would undoubtedly be triaged as a low-risk patient. "There is an anesthetic gel I found in one of the drawers," Ilgaz stared deeply into her eyes. "It won't completely remove the discomfort, but it should be enough to ease it. If I could feel the pain instead of you, I swear I would," he promised.
Ceylin took a deep breath, gathering the courage she needed. Removing the small tracker certainly couldn't be worse than the occasional accidental cut people suffered at home or work every now and then.
The lawyer noticed the determination in Ilgaz's look, and that encouraged her. He was doing everything he could to help her. She wouldn't be a disappointment.
"Okay," Ceylin agreed, taking a deep breath to calm herself. "If you've survived a stab to the stomach, I can certainly overcome a scrape on my back."
Despite the gravity of the situation, Ilgaz couldn't help but smile at her witty remark.
"Don't move, okay?" the prosecutor instructed after using a cotton ball soaked in alcohol to wipe her skin clean, followed by a generous amount of the anesthetic gel. Next, Ilgaz took a large needle and used the sharp bevel to deftly make a small cut in the lawyer's back.
Less than a minute later, Ilgaz held in his hand an object not much bigger than a grain of rice. As he showed Ceylin the tracker, he could see in her eyes that the lawyer was as surprised and outraged as he was.
"What are you going to do with that?" Ceylin asked once she was done putting her clothes back on, purposefully avoiding his gaze. After the thorough physical examination Ilgaz had performed on her body and the responses she couldn't control, the lawyer had a hard time making eye contact with him. "Are you going to destroy it?"
"Destroying it would be my impulsive reaction," Ilgaz confessed. "But I'm afraid that will make them realize we've found out about the tracker, which might eventually alert them to cover their tracks."
"Exactly," Ceylin smirked, happy to see they were on the same page. "I have a better idea."
"Ceylin!" Ilgaz took a step in her direction, but it was already too late.
"They like to improperly dispose of medical waste, don't they?" Ceylin uttered the words with suppressed fury. "I want to see what they'll do when I dump this here," she added, tossing the tracker into a cardboard sharp-safety box. "Let them follow me to the ends of the earth," a crooked grin lit up Ceylin's features. She was clearly taking pleasure in imagining her kidnappers tracking her to a medical waste site only to realize she wasn't there.
Ilgaz sighed nervously. There was no way he could retrieve the object since Ceylin had thrown it into a box full of used and contaminated needles.
"Ceylin!" He scolded her. "You just tampered with evidence!" Ilgaz felt like strangling her for her impulsivity.
"Now is not the time to turn on prosecutor mode, Ilgaz," Ceylin shrugged. She didn't care that tracker wasn't added to the case file, for she was confident they wouldn't need it to make justice prevail. The lawyer was extremely relieved that her captors could no longer locate her.
Ilgaz stared at her, perplexed. He watched as Ceylin unlocked the doors and pulled up the curtains. The prosecutor finally realized they had been there for a long time, and the others in the waiting room had probably reached their own conclusions.
"You're thinking about what you're going to tell Melis to explain why you asked me here first, aren't you?" Ceylin read Ilgaz's thoughts after noticing the shadow of guilt on his face. The lawyer didn't need a verbal answer from him to realize she was right. Holding her breath, Ceylin finally looked him in the eye. "I am sorry for all the chaos I've created, Ilgaz," the lawyer hesitated, unsure whether or not to keep talking. She ultimately decided to do so when Ilgaz kept his gaze on her. "I know my being in your home and your life has certainly stirred up conflicts in your relationship. I swear I never meant to give you any trouble."
Ceylin was surprised to realize she wasn't lying. Even though the thought of Ilgaz with another woman was almost too painful to bear, deep down, all she really wanted was for him to be happy. If that meant Ilgaz would build a life with someone else, she would just have to learn how to deal with it.
"I appreciate you being sorry," Ilgaz swallowed hard, "but I'm not."
Ceylin was about to leave the room when she made sense of his words. Confused, she turned back to Ilgaz, who explained:
"You're right, Ceylin. Your return to my life has surely created conflicts in my relationship," the prosecutor said, dismayed. "But the truth is, rather than being angry with you for that, I should actually thank you."
He knew his words would make little sense, but Ilgaz intended to clarify them. A look of surprise was still evident on Ceylin's face when he resumed talking.
"I always like to stick to the truth," Ilgaz sighed heavily. The most difficult part of that conversation wasn't to admit those things to Ceylin but rather to himself. Just like Neva, Melis was perfect for him only in theory, but he'd been too haunted by the demons in his past to acknowledge it. Ilgaz had tried at all costs to convince himself that his theoretical compatibility with Melis would be enough in the long run, but now he could see that he would never be truly happy by the teacher's side. A lifetime of sullen, silent dinners and emotional distance weren't things he wanted for himself. "But I have been lying to myself for far too long."
Ceylin felt her heart racing in her chest. Was it possible that Ilgaz really was saying what she thought he was saying?
"Today, when I looked at all that blood in my shirt, I feared for my life. That made me realize many things," Ilgaz confessed.
A few hours before, when the whole situation had unfolded, a flood of memories had overwhelmed Ilgaz's thoughts. The prosecutor believed that, in a situation where he feared for his life, the woman he was building a life with should be the first thing on his mind.
However, instead of Melis's angelic features and delicate blue eyes, all Ilgaz could think about was a hurricane of a woman with silky brown hair and captivating green eyes.
"I know what it's like to go through that," Ceylin looked at him with sympathy. She had experienced that same nightmare when she was blindfolded and tied to a chair.
The lawyer noticed Ilgaz's panting breaths and swallowed hard. He was looking in her direction but his gaze seemed lost. It was as if Ilgaz wanted to say more but wasn't sure whether he should.
In an attempt to encourage him and get them out of the silence that was creating a palpable tension, Ceylin surreptitiously pressed him.
"I'm not really the one you should be having that conversation with, am I?"
Ilgaz quickly understood what she meant.
"No," the prosecutor agreed with a head nod. "The conversation I want to have with you is entirely different."
The way he kept his eyes locked on hers as he stated his words so decisively made Ceylin's heart race.
"Maybe one day when all of this is over and the dust has settled," Ilgaz pointed to their surroundings, thinking about the investigation, the threat on Ceylin's life, and his own health condition, "you and I could sit somewhere nice and have a conversation of our own. Preferably in a place far away from a hospital or a corporate bathroom," he added lightheartedly.
Ceylin experienced a sense of joy and optimism that she hadn't allowed herself to feel until then.
Even though Ilgaz had been injured, he was okay and was expected to make a full recovery. The people responsible for trying to kill her were on the verge of going to jail. And from what Ceylin had gathered, the prosecutor was about to put an end to his current relationship. She didn't know how things could get any better than that.
Unable to contain herself, Ceylin channeled her joy into a dazzling smile, unconsciously flirting with Ilgaz.
"Maybe?" She bit her lower lip teasingly and looked at him through long, curvy lashes. "Should I take your maybe as you not being sure you really want to talk to me?"
"No," Ilgaz replied awkwardly, looking adorably shy. He massaged the back of his neck with one hand, disconcerted. Ceylin's smile grew wider. She was pleased with the way she could still get under his skin. "I mean, yes. I am sure I want to," Ilgaz took a deep breath and looked more confident when he faced her again. "I want us to have a conversation, Ceylin."
"Well," the lawyer smiled at him once more before heading toward the door, "I guess you'll have to ask me if you want to know my answer."
"I will," Ilgaz smiled back at her, encouraged.
The prosecutor contented himself with watching Ceylin, hoping that soon, he would never have to watch her leave again.
When the lawyer had already turned the handle to open the door, the sound of Ilgaz's voice stopped her from leaving.
"Hey, Ceylin?"
She turned on her heels again, her heart fluttering inside her chest. Ceylin didn't want to leave him, but she knew it was the right thing to do.
"If I ask you out, what are you going to say?"
Ceylin fought off a grin but ultimately smiled in a mysterious, provocative way. She remained silent on purpose for the following seconds, lingering at the door, confident that it would tempt Ilgaz even more. Only when she saw that the anxiety on his face was slowly turning into anguish did the lawyer finally confess, unable to conceal her own happiness:
"I'm going to say yes."
.
"What do you mean she left?" Ilgaz frowned at Eren as the commissioner returned to the hospital room.
Eren sighed heavily before placing a chair next to the prosecutor's bed.
"I don't know, brother," he shrugged before removing the portable radio from his belt to finally sit down. "I think she was really upset with what you did."
Ilgaz remained silent for the next few seconds, consumed with guilt. Although he knew his relationship with Melis was doomed, that wasn't how he wanted to break things off with her.
"Do you mean the fact I asked Ceylin to come into the room first?" Ilgaz asked, even though he already knew the answer.
"Of course, brother," Eren gave him a reproachful glare. "What woman in the world would like that? Melis stormed out of here with tears in her eyes. I didn't even know what to say to her."
Ilgaz took a deep breath, feeling miserable. He knew that Eren was right, so he didn't answer.
"How are you feeling?" the commissioner asked, changing the subject.
"Like I've been stabbed," was Ilgaz's grouch reply. He really didn't want to discuss his feelings.
Eren waited a few seconds to see if the prosecutor would elaborate a little more or at least offer a glimpse of what he planned to do to fix the mess he'd gotten into. However, Ilgaz's lack of verbal response didn't surprise his friend.
"Just tell me one thing," the amused smile on Eren's face made his suspicions very clear. "Why did you ask for Ceylin to come here in the first place?"
Ilgaz immediately understood what Eren was hinting at.
"It's not what you think," the prosecutor affirmed.
Eren raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.
"Isn't it?"
Ilgaz noticed that his friend could barely conceal his reactions. Eren was an open book, and it was pretty clear that he was rejoicing in the possibility that Ilgaz asking to see Ceylin first indicated she meant more to the prosecutor than he would like to admit.
"No," Ilgaz tried to sound confident, but he'd always been a terrible liar.
"So you're telling me nothing is going on between you and Ceylin?"
"I'm not telling you anything because there's nothing to tell," Ilgaz evasively answered. The way he averted his eyes made Eren sure there was a lot his friend wasn't sharing. "The reason I called Ceylin here was to take care of her own safety."
Ilgaz spent the next few minutes explaining to Eren his suspicions about the tracking device and how he'd come to a conclusion. After that, Eren felt even more confident.
Just like Ilgaz, the commissioner knew it was only a matter of time before they got around to punishing the people responsible for Ceylin's kidnapping and ensuring the lawyer's safety.
Similarly, Eren was also sure that it was also only a matter of time before Ilgaz and Ceylin realized that they were much better when they were together, in every possible connotation.
.
Eren sighed heavily when he entered his office at the police station. He had just left Ceylin at the Erguvan house, where the lawyer would spend the night. They were still unsure if Ilgaz would be released from the hospital, so the prosecutor insisted that Eren drive her there.
Even though the main suspects of stalking Ceylin were in custody, Ilgaz didn't want to risk leaving her alone, be it in her own office or his apartment. After some verbal debate, the lawyer reluctantly agreed, but Eren suspected she did it more to please Ilgaz than for any other reason.
It was still relatively early, and the commissioner planned to spend the rest of his shift sifting through the new evidence arriving at the station from Istanbul and Ankara. Eren knew Ilgaz was dying to be there doing the same, but until he was released from the hospital, the prosecutor couldn't be of much help.
Determined to make things easier for his friend as soon as Ilgaz could resume his post, Eren opened the first file folder and meticulously analyzed the evidence. He was about to move on to the second folder when a shadow near the door to his office caught his attention.
"Umut!" Eren was surprised by the guy's hesitation in coming in. "What are you doing standing there?" The commissioner asked, puzzled. But then he noticed the stack of papers Umut was carrying in one hand and guessed that the officer was bringing new evidence. "What did you bring?"
The prolonged silence let Eren know that something was wrong.
"Umut?" the commissioner asked more pointedly, alarmed. His tone of voice transformed as he gazed at his subordinate again, and this time Eren didn't ask but demanded, "tell me what's that."
Umut looked pale, and his breathing got heavier. Despite the comfortable temperature, the police officer was sweating.
When Eren got up from his chair, Umut finally couldn't contain himself any longer.
"I made a terrible mistake, boss," the youngest man confessed, finally stepping into the room and closing the door behind him. Umut scanned his surroundings, ensuring no one could eavesdrop before he resumed talking. "I don't even know how to start talking about this..." the guy tightened his fingers around the papers he was carrying, unconsciously crumpling the documents in his hand.
"Umut, what have you done?" Eren asked in a severe tone. He could see in the desperation in the other guy's face that something terrible had happened.
"I know I'm going to be fired," Umut's voice faltered. "My career will be ruined, but I can't go on lying anymore," he took two steps forward and hesitated again when he met Eren's piercing gaze. After long seconds in which the two men stared into each other's eyes, Umut finally admitted, "commissioner, I am a man with no honor."
"Umut, what have you done?" Eren lost his patience.
"I don't know what got into me," the youngest looked on the verge of tears as he confessed, "I never thought I'd be this kind of police officer, but I betrayed my own honor and the values we preach here," Umut snuffled, dejected. "And now I'm ready to pay for my mistakes."
.
Ilgaz sank onto the couch in his living room, overcome with mixed emotions he didn't quite know how to process.
Being unexpectedly injured had undoubtedly contributed to changing his perspective on several things. The prosecutor had naively assumed he could put his life in order as practically as he would have liked, but everything seemed even more confusing than before.
Ilgaz winced when he turned around to reach for his cell phone in his back pocket. He'd been lucky enough not to have been severely injured, but he'd still needed a lot of stitches on his wound. However, the physical discomfort paled in comparison to the relief he felt knowing they had successfully removed the main threat to Ceylin's life from the streets.
Ilgaz hadn't seen her since the previous afternoon when she had left him at the hospital escorted by Eren less than twenty-four hours ago. However, one day was enough for the prosecutor to notice the melancholic mood that took over his apartment without Ceylin's radiant presence to light up the place.
Discouraged, Ilgaz once again clicked on Melis's contact number. Just like in previous times, she didn't answer his call.
Despite his injury, Ilgaz had managed to drive himself home in his car, but first, he'd stopped by the school where the teacher worked, determined to have an honest conversation with her and finally resolve the situation between them. He needed to break free from that relationship to move on with his life, but Melis seemed to want to torture him because, in addition to not answering his calls, the school staff claimed she was unavailable and couldn't meet him.
Ilgaz was extremely disgruntled that things seemed to be beyond his reach. Attempting to regain some control back, he settled for analyzing the evidence the police force had accumulated over the past day. Eren had set aside some documents for him to check, and that was an excellent way to start.
About an hour later, the doorbell to his apartment rang, and Ilgaz had to remind himself that he shouldn't be disappointed to find his best friend on the other side of the door. Deep down, he couldn't help but wish it was someone else.
"Hey. I figured you wouldn't be up to cooking, so I brought dinner," Eren explained, excitedly lifting a plastic bag to show its content. "How are you feeling, brother?"
"I'm fine," Ilgaz answered automatically, stepping aside to allow the commissioner to enter his apartment. "I managed to get some work done."
"Good," Eren perked up and went on to unwrap the sandwiches he'd brought.
The commissioner noticed that Ilgaz didn't bring up any other subject, but he wasn't surprised. Eren already expected his friend to resist talking about personal matters.
The commissioner forced himself to divert his thoughts to work, but then he remembered Umut's confession and hesitated. For a moment, he considered sharing it with Ilgaz but ultimately decided against it. The prosecutor already had enough on his plate. They didn't need one more problem.
Despite initially finding him thoughtful and silent, little by little, Ilgaz started to engage in a lively conversation with Eren. The prosecutor had to admit to himself that he felt reinvigorated after a hot meal, and that reflected positively on his mood.
They spent the following few hours reviewing most of the copies of the documents that the police had apprehended in the corporate offices of the investigated companies. Eren could see in Ilgaz's face that the prosecutor was thrilled about every slight detail of wrongdoing they found. Their claim that a cartel of corrupt companies was acting at a national level was growing stronger. Ilgaz was very close to building up a brilliant case that would positively affect the lives of thousands of people while sending ill-intended powerful people to jail in the process.
The joy on the prosecutor's face was contagious. That was why Eren was so surprised when, a couple of hours after they had started looking into the documents, Ilgaz's shoulders seemed to sag, and the prosecutor's face turned into a mask of cold indifference that made Eren's blood freeze.
The commissioner noticed that Ilgaz was holding the files listing details of the company called Crux. The small dossier put together by the police force contained information on the last case Ceylin had been involved in before returning to Istanbul.
Eren noticed when Ilgaz singled out a picture from the compiled files and stared at it.
"Who is that?" The commissioner asked, unable to resist his curiosity.
Ilgaz's face was completely impassive. The prosecutor's neutral expression hid every emotion he was experiencing as if everything that had been motivating him to seek the truth had suddenly vanished.
"This is Mert Aslan," Ilgaz informed him. Seeing that the name didn't ring any bells to Eren, he added, "he was a businessman in Ankara, the one who initially suspected Crux was dirty. He started a case against the company that most likely had him killed."
Eren studied his friend's face, seeing how Ilgaz treaded the subject mechanically. He knew the prosecutor well enough and could tell that whenever Ilgaz came across something that threw him off his tracks, the prosecutor would automatically shut down and raise that wall of cynicism. It was a defense mechanism Eren had seen him use many times before.
"Yeah, but why is he relevant now?" Eren asked, surprised. The businessman's murder shouldn't be news to Ilgaz.
An uncomfortable silence lingered in the air. Eren wanted to press Ilgaz and question him again, but he was intimidated by his friend's completely impassive expression.
After what seemed like minutes, Ilgaz finally decided to talk.
"It's relevant because this is the potential client Ceylin said she rejected when she worked for Tigris," Ilgaz replied through gritted teeth, assaulted by a sharp wave of pain that had nothing to do with the attack he'd suffered the day before.
But who was actually the man she was dating in Ankara, a voice in his head added.
Ilgaz felt the bitter taste of betrayal burning his insides.
Eren's frown showed all his confusion. The commissioner opened and closed his mouth several times but didn't say a word. It became obvious to Ilgaz that Eren had a lot of questions but didn't know how to ask them.
"What Ms. Ceylin conveniently failed to mention," Ilgaz explained in a wry tone, unable to keep concealing the rage that consumed him, "is that she had a personal relationship with this alleged client. That is probably how she got into this mess," the prosecutor drew his conclusions.
"What?" Eren scoffed in disbelief. "That can't be true, brother. Ceylin never mentioned anything about a relationship. She's clearly still crazy about you. Everyone can see that."
Ilgaz failed to contain a disdainful grunt. He had been pretty close to believing that too.
"The only thing she still clearly is is a terrific liar! Just like she's always been," Ilgaz used Eren's words on purpose, seething with rage.
The prosecutor took a deep breath and let it out slowly, berating himself for his momentary lack of control. Acting impulsively only served to make himself a hostage of ridicule. Ilgaz hated that Ceylin had that power over him.
Once again, the lawyer had lied to him. Once again, she had deceived him.
Only this time, Ceylin hadn't just betrayed Ilgaz. She had also used him.
Ilgaz looked one more time at the picture in his hands and was overtaken by a fury that didn't seem to fit inside him. That guy in the photo was the same one he'd seen with Ceylin when he'd gone to Ankara.
At the time, when he'd arrived at the prestigious law firm where Ceylin worked searching for her, Ilgaz had been immediately directed to the corporate floor.
A young secretary had cordially welcomed him but regretted informing the prosecutor that Ceylin was not present at that moment. The woman then mentioned that the lawyer had left earlier that afternoon in the company of her boyfriend.
The word alone had been enough to freeze Ilgaz.
Oblivious to the prosecutor's feelings, the secretary had shared that maybe the couple could be in the yoga class they attended together. She'd given Ilgaz instructions on where he could find Ceylin if it was an urgent matter.
Being a complete stranger, the woman had no reason to lie to Ilgaz. But at the time, he was still reluctant to believe Ceylin was really over their divorce and had already started something new with someone else.
Ilgaz had already spent the last year with his head full of doubts and uncertainties. He couldn't live with any more questions. So, against his resolution not to run after those who wanted to leave, Ilgaz had once again gone after Ceylin.
He drove to the small studio where the secretary mentioned Ilgaz might find the lawyer. But when he parked his car in the street, the scene Ilgaz witnessed made him feel like the ground beneath him had just vanished.
The familiar figure of Ceylin dressed in yoga pants with a mat rolled up under her arm at any other time would have enchanted Ilgaz. But the sight of that mesmerizing smile on her face directed to another man made the prosecutor feel suffocated, unable to breathe.
Ilgaz had never forgotten the face of the guy who had leaned toward Ceylin that afternoon to say something in her ear.
It was the same face he now saw in the photograph attached to the documents of the case he was investigating.
The prosecutor was suddenly seized by the irrational urge to tear up every single one of those papers and throw all the folders against the wall. He hadn't been prepared for the blow he'd just taken and wasn't sure he could recover from the shock.
"How did Ceylin lie to you, brother?" Eren hesitated, still unable to understand why Ilgaz seemed so nervous. "I witnessed with my own eyes how she's been the target of these people," Eren pointed to the documents they had been examining.
"She told me this guy was a potential client. But Ceylin never mentioned that she knew him personally," the prosecutor repeated with poorly contained anger, unable to accept how hurt he was. "This guy was murdered by the company that's now after her," he explained, "but he's the same man I saw her with when I went to Ankara." Ilgaz then looked up and met his best friend's gaze, struggling to contain the fury coursing through his veins as he tasted the bitter words leaving his mouth. "Ceylin didn't just come to me because she feared for her life, Eren. That was probably the catalyst for her return to Istambul," the prosecutor pointed out, failing to realize he was holding the papers so tightly in his hands that his knuckles had turned white, "the real reason she got close to me again was to get justice for the death of her boyfriend."
.
Ceylin stared at her cell phone, irrationally expecting that would be enough to make her receive the phone call she wanted to receive.
Frustrated by the silence that ensued, the lawyer sighed deeply in an attempt to restrain the insecurity that threatened to take over her.
During the past day, she had tried to reach Ilgaz many times, but the prosecutor had not answered her calls. The messages she'd left on his voicemail were also ignored. Ceylin couldn't understand why he was avoiding her, considering everything that was said in their last interaction.
The lawyer had heard from Eren that Ilgaz was in good health and had already been discharged from the hospital, but she didn't dare to ask the commissioner if he had an update about the current status of Ilgaz's relationship. Deep down, Ceylin couldn't help but wonder if Melis was the reason Ilgaz didn't seem to want to talk to her anymore.
The only plausible explanation she could think of for how the prosecutor was acting was that she had got it all wrong, and Ilgaz had never intended to break up with Melis in the first place. When they were together at the hospital, the prosecutor had implied that he meant to talk to the teacher, and Ceylin had automatically assumed he would end his relationship with her.
But what if the conversation had served precisely to bring them closer together?
In the short time she had recently spent with Ilgaz, Ceylin had been through several situations that rekindled the flame of her desire for him. Was it possible that all that attraction had only confused her head and clouded her judgement?
Ceylin swallowed hard and carelessly tossed her cell phone on her bed. She shouldn't be surprised if she'd actually gotten it all wrong. She only had herself to blame because she had probably seen what she wanted to see instead of the truth.
The lawyer paced back and forth inside the bedroom at her mother's house. Her head was buzzing with questions she had no answers to. Ceylin was nervous enough, but her heart raced when her cell phone unexpectedly rang. In a fraction of a second, all her enthusiasm vanished, though. It wasn't Ilgaz's name that lit up the screen on the device, but Eren's.
The commissioner seemed excited when he asked Ceylin to meet at the police station. The lawyer left her mother's house and got into a taxi, belatedly realizing that Eren had not objected to the idea of her leaving the house alone. On the contrary, he had just led her to do so.
Her optimistic expectations were confirmed the moment Ceylin entered the small office assigned to the commissioner near the busy bullpen.
"Is this for real?" Ceylin smiled effusively when she saw the joy stamped on her friend's face. "Is it really what I am thinking? You're not joking?"
"I wouldn't joke about this," Eren celebrated alongside her. The commissioner had a triumphant, overly dignified air of confidence when he finally admitted, "we got the evidence we needed, Ceylin. You were right," Eren could barely contain his enthusiasm, "everything points to a cartel of corrupt companies. The Ankara police linked all of them to illicit contracts negotiated by a politician named Cahill. Arrest warrants are being issued as we speak."
"Eren!" Ceylin did not contain her happiness and hugged her friend, hoping to express her gratitude for his help.
"You won't have to worry about your safety anymore, Ceylin," Eren stated." The men who have been following you have already been identified and detained. We have emails and several calls connecting them to the Crux directors. You will likely get a subpoena to testify at a deposition, but it all points to your life returning to normal real soon."
Ceylin let out a breath of relief for the first time in months.
The lawyer looked around, resisting to believe that the nightmare was really coming to an end. Everything was perfect. Everything, except for one thing.
"Eren, where is Ilgaz?"
The lawyer got to see firsthand the cheerful glint in his friend's eyes disappearing.
"He's really busy, Ceylin," Eren looked away as he answered. The commissioner scratched his forehead nervously. "Ilgaz has been working hard on this case, and you know he's still not one hundred percent recovered from his injury."
Ceylin could see there was more to it.
"Why doesn't he answer my calls?" The lawyer asked, trying to maintain her composure. "I've been trying to talk to him, but Ilgaz just ignores me. What's going on?"
The commissioner hesitated for the next few seconds, apparently unsure whether or not to get involved in the matter.
"Listen, Ceylin, I don't want to get between something that only pertains to the two of you..."
"He should be here with us," Ceylin interrupted her friend. She knew how hard Ilgaz had worked to get them to where they were with the case. "We're supposed to be celebrating together. Why doesn't he answer my calls?"
Eren's silence only raised Ceylin's suspicions that something was very wrong.
"What are you not telling me, Eren?" the lawyer asked in a severe tone.
"I don't know anything, Ceylin."
"Is everything all right with Ilgaz?"
"Yes."
"Then why isn't he here?"
The faltering tone of voice and the profound disappointment in Ceylin's eyes touched Eren. If the lawyer had yelled at him or angrily demanded that he share what he knew, Eren probably wouldn't have been as moved. But the sorrow on the lawyer's face broke his heart.
"Ceylin, I know you two have a complicated history and a painful past," Eren simplified things, seeing in the lawyer's face that she agreed with what he had just said. The commissioner sighed heavily before adding, "maybe some things are better left in the past."
The lawyer frowned, confused. Why was Eren talking in that negative and enigmatic way?
"What's going on?" She tried not to plead. "Why is Ilgaz avoiding me? Everything seemed to be fine yesterday," the lawyer tilted her head to the side, desolate. "What changed?"
Ceylin's voice cracked slightly when she asked the last question. Eren saw the anguish in her face. A pool of tears gathered in her eyes, but the lawyer stubbornly refused to shed them. Ceylin was tough and confident, but in moments like that, her vulnerability showed, making Eren feel even worse for sharing something that he knew would end up hurting her even more.
"Ilgaz is very disappointed, Ceylin," the commissioner lowered his head, feeling like a coward for not looking into her eyes as he broke the news, "he finally told me what happened when he went to Ankara to see you."
Ceylin repeatedly blinked, stunned by what she had just heard. Surely she had misunderstood.
"Ilgaz went to Ankara?" The lawyer asked, incredulous. She saw the answer on Eren's face and felt her head spinning. "What...? How?" She choked on her questions. "When did this happen, Eren?"
The commissioner believed it was best that Ceylin and Ilgaz discussed the matter between themselves, but he feared what the lawyer might do to him if he didn't answer her questions.
"About a year after you left Istambul," Eren confessed, watching Ceylin's face gradually transform as she absorbed the information. "Ilgaz was devastated after you left. For a long time, he was just a shadow of his former self. Every day, he would show up to work and fulfill his duties, but he seemed to have lost the joy of living. He did everything in a mechanic way as if he no longer saw meaning anymore."
Ceylin closed her eyes with a frown, trying her best to process what Eren was saying, but all of her senses seemed stunned.
"Ilgaz went to Ankara," she repeated, still unable to believe it, "he went there to see me."
"Yes," Eren confirmed, noticing how the lawyer nervously fidgeted with her arms as she paced back and forth inside the enclosed space, letting her anxiety show, "after you left, for a long time, I tried to convince Ilgaz to move on with his life, but he always resisted because he believed that, eventually, you would come back. Nothing would convince him of another possibility."
The commissioner's revelation hit Ceylin like something sharp was slicing her soul. Her throat burned with tears she proudly refused to shed. Ceylin knew that if she started to cry, she probably wouldn't be able to stop.
The lawyer tried to steady her shaky breaths, but her effort was in vain. She felt saturated as if a thousand different thoughts and feelings overflew her mind and heart. What was the limit of different emotions that fit the inside of a person before they exploded?
"Did Ilgaz really think I'd come back?" Ceylin tried to convince herself of what Eren was saying, aware that accepting the truth also meant dealing with all the mistakes she had made in the past.
"He never considered otherwise," the commissioner said in a low voice. "Ilgaz took his time going after you because he imagined you needed the time and the distance to get your head straight. But after nearly a year, he figured you still hadn't come back out of sheer pride and stubbornness," Eren lowered his head, unable to meet Ceylin's eyes as he shared what he knew. "So he decided to go to you. Ilgaz left determined to work things out between the two of you. He planned to bring you back."
A silent tear finally overpowered Ceylin's resolve and rolled down the lawyer's cheek.
Her marriage to the love of her life had ended abruptly and impulsively. Ceylin had never loved anyone like she loved Ilgaz, and never before had she allowed anyone to love her the way the prosecutor once had.
For a long time, Ceylin had suffered questioning her decision to give up on everything. But the traumas in her past had hurt her so much that, after the first big disappointment in their relationship, Ceylin didn't have the courage to move forward.
Instead of staying and fighting alongside Ilgaz for the best thing that had ever happened to her, Ceylin had acted like a coward and run away.
She had already wasted too much time resenting Ilgaz for thinking he had given up on them just as easily. The lawyer had used that argument to convince herself that the distance between them and the prosecutor's apparent non-reactivity were signs that the intensity of what they had experienced once was nothing more than a mere illusion, and perhaps what they felt for each other wasn't something as transcendental as she had thought.
However, hearing from Eren that Ilgaz had spent almost a year suffering, with his life practically on hold while waiting for her return, made Ceylin feel like the worst of all creatures.
Ilgaz hadn't just loved and accepted her like no one else before him. He had also shown with actions rather than words how much he believed in her and how much faith he had in their love. Ceylin had been too foolish and cowardly to notice it in time. She really didn't deserve him.
"How come I didn't know about this before?" The lawyer used the sleeve of her shirt to wipe away her tears. "If Ilgaz really went to Ankara after me, why didn't he come to see me?"
Once again, Eren faltered. But he couldn't hide what he knew.
"He always refused to talk about it," the commissioner shared, thinking back to how many times he'd questioned his best friend about his trip only to hear evasive answers before Ilgaz shut down, annoyed with the subject. Eren glanced reproachfully at the lawyer as he rummaged through one of the drawers and removed a folder. The commissioner went through the documents until he found the picture he wanted.
Completely dazed, Ceylin distinguished Mert Aslan's face in the image Eren was holding. The commissioner interpreted her silent confusion as an admission of guilt.
"Ilgaz found out about your relationship with this guy when he went to Ankara. That's why he didn't seek you out."
"Relationship?" Ceylin frowned, puzzled. A feeling of unease began to build within her when she was assaulted by memories of the lies she'd told and schemes she'd created to justify Mert's presence inside the Tigris building. "What relationship?"
Eren looked at her impatiently, irritated that the lawyer still had the nerve to pretend she didn't know.
"Ilgaz told me everything, Ceylin," the commissioner rolled his eyes. "He found out about your involvement with this man. He went to your office looking for you, but your boss's secretary explained that you'd left with your boyfriend. After that, Ilgaz saw you with the guy outside your dance place," Eren took offense for his friend. "Ilgaz waited for you for a year. He drove to Ankara only to discover you had already moved on with your life. How do you think that made him feel? And if that wasn't bad enough, now he also found out you used him to investigate your boyfriend's death without even coming clean about it?" Eren frowned, aggrieved. "You could have at least told him the truth, Ceylin," the commissioner shook his head in disapproval. "Ilgaz felt like a fool. He truly believed that..."
But Eren's words hung in the air, incomplete.
Ceylin's first impulse was to angrily refute the lies she'd just been accused of, but the voice of conscience in the back of her mind prevented her from taking out her frustration on her friend.
"He believed what, Eren?" She asked in a pleading voice, holding onto a thread of hope.
Eren just lowered his head.
Ceylin took a deep breath, trying to regain control of herself. If there was anyone to blame for that whole mess, it was her.
The lawyer remained unable to speak, pondering over everything she had heard. The perplexed look on Eren's face showed how stunned he was by her uncharacteristically quiet reaction.
Eren expected Ceylin to act up and make a lame excuse to mitigate her faults. The silence and expression of deep sadness on her face made him question what was really going on.
Ceylin took a deep breath and sat down in one of the chairs in the commissioner's room with an air of defeat.
Her own lies had complicated everything for herself. Her dishonesty and complete disregard for the rules - features that Ilgaz so vehemently condemned - had ultimately resulted in the loss of what was most important to her.
Ceylin had become a victim of her own scam.
In an attempt to spare herself, Ceylin had avoided contact with the man she loved. Instead of talking to Ilgaz and dealing with what was in front of her, the lawyer had created an alternate reality in her head to try to escape the pain. She had convinced herself that the divorce was the best solution.
A short time later, she'd broken company rules by taking Mert to her office at Tigris. Ceylin had justified his presence there by telling a lie, leading her boss's secretary to believe that the man was indeed her boyfriend.
Fate had ensured that Ilgaz went to her workplace precisely at a moment when she was absent, and asked for information about her from the same person Ceylin had so blatantly deceived.
What reason would Ilgaz have to doubt that the woman was telling the truth? Especially when the secretary herself didn't know she was telling a lie when she'd said to the prosecutor that Mert was Ceylin's boyfriend?
And even if Ilgaz had given her the benefit of the doubt, the mere fact he'd seen her in Mert's company would serve as proof to his suspicion.
Ceylin lowered her head and stared at her lap.
The anger and resentment she'd thought to have seen in Ilgaz when they'd first after her return to Istanbul made perfect sense now.
The prosecutor hadn't simply moved on with his life and started a relationship with Melis as Ceylin had initially assumed. He'd gotten involved with the teacher because Ceylin had broken his heart.
Ilgaz had spent an entire year faithfully believing in her return, but when she'd failed him, he'd taken upon himself the responsibility of mending their relationship. He'd gone to her hoping they could work things out but was met by what he thought to be an unforgivable betrayal. And yet, he'd been willing to help her when Ceylin had needed him the most.
Ceylin's own flaws and misdoings had ultimately pushed the man she loved into the arms of another woman.
Overtaken by a wave of self-loathing, Ceylin abruptly rose from her chair. She needed to find Ilgaz. She had to clarify the truth.
She needed to go to the prosecutor and explain that everything had been a terrible mistake.
Ceylin had just discovered that, just like her, Ilgaz had never really gotten over their separation.
He probably thought now was too late for them to have a chance together, but Ceylin knew it wasn't.
She had already let her faults and ill-advised decisions based on lack of communication prevent her from being happy with the man she loved.
Ceylin would not make the same mistake again.
Without saying a word to Eren, who was looking at her with a confused frown, Ceylin grabbed her bag and left the police station to go to Ilgaz's apartment, determined to clear up those misunderstandings once and for all.
--
I am going to be honest, I wanted to write the scene of Ceylin arriving at Ilgaz's apartment in this chapter but it was too long already, so I had to leave their confrontation for the next installment. I can't wait to write it!
Ilgaz has finally revealed what he discovered in Ankara (or what he thinks he discovered lol). Will Ceylin be able to convince him of the truth?
I want know how many of you guessed that Ceylin had a tracker in her body. 😂 The clue was there from the start (there is a mention in chapter 1 that Ceylin has a back ache between her shoulder blades that never seems to heal).
What happens next? Will Ilgaz forgive this tiny little lie Ceylin has told? 😂😂😂 He's overlooked so many in the past... one more, one less, what difference does it make? hahahaha #perdoaSavci (that means "Forgive, Savci" in Portuguese).
Now the stage is yours. I will see you guys in the next chapter!