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11 year old Aurora
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Dear Diary
Sep, 11th, 2007
I started middle school last week. It sounded like a scary nightmare. None of the guys was allowed to stay in school with me this year. They said they had work to do, and that I was a big girl now.
But really, it wasn't entirely the worst. Because I made a new friend two days ago. Her name is Rachel. Rachel is cool, she liked to read. I don't like to read. But I still thought she was cool.
When we sat for lunch, she would get distracted by her books. But that wasn't how everyone else ate lunch. Everyone else was talking to their friends and laughing. What was wrong with us?
I thought that maybe I needed to start a conversation. I talked about the new pet bird I had. I had begged Gabriel for a pet bird. He said yes and got me one. I named him Serpiento.
But Rachel didn't look up, not even once. She didn't think Serpiento was cool. So, I told her the second coolest thing I knew to make her talk more, I told her about the serpents. I wanted to be talk to her during lunch, so I told her I was rich and that my mother ran a gang.
She told her parents.
And today morning, I sat outside the headmistress's office and Rachel's parents were inside.
Rachel was also there with me. She sat on another bench. I even tried to talk to her. But she kept on staring at her shoes. So, I started staring at my shoes too.
Until my mother came. And she went inside too.
They were screaming. They must've been mad. Maybe it was something I did. Or something Rachel did.
After an hour, Rachel's parents came out quickly and grabbed Rachel and went away just like that. My Mother stayed inside for longer.
Then she came out and sat with me. She told me that what I did was stupid and that now she had to move me. I told her no and that I had a friend here. But she didn't care. She was really angry that day, she was calling people through her phone the whole ride back home. Being angry at them too.
And when we reached, I started crying because she told me I won't ever see Rachel again. But I never had friends and I didn't want to leave Rachel.
It just happened an hour ago, my mother was so angry that she hit me.
I cried, I cried even more.
So she hit me again, and when I asked her to stop, I told her mom stop, she said to not call her mom. And that she was Maria for me. She was Maria before she was a mom.
So I promised not to call her mom anymore. I wont call maria mom anymore.
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Sep, 9th, 2018
Another punch.
And I'm left groaning on the floor. I can say very proudly that I managed to doge every possible hit threatening my ethereal face.
But my stomach was having enough. And they looked like they were done. Finally, I couldn't take it any longer.
I think the worst part of being jumped in a gang is probably the fact that you're being attacked and you don't have the right to fight back. You are not allowed the right to fight back. With every punch and every kick, I wanted to throw my hands too, to throw my legs and hurt those bitches so bad. But it took me a second, every time, to remember that they were doing their job. And that this was the sick, twisted, rule separating me from being protected. Which is ironic considering that they were hurting me right now, but that was beside the point.
Because I was sure, that whatever danger was hiding in the bushes, waiting for me to make one wrong move, was not easy. And that whomever it was, I was not safe. And so not safe, they might light me up on fire. Or even torture my every bone before brutally murdering me. Whatever nasty plan was on their mind, I knew they bore me nothing but malice.
And that with their protection, the santos, I was protected from whatever arson, torture, or murder there was. At least for the time being.
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Oscar
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My thoughts were foggy. I think I finally drank enough now. I couldn't focus on it. But I saw her get beaten. The girl, the reason I was late to back my brother up when he needed me. The girl I was trying to protect.
She wasn't much. maybe I have become a softy. Meirda.
I hear them retracing, and I see her on the ground minutes later. Aurora was in that familiar, dark, flannel I gave her. My heart ached at the sight of it. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was another poison I housed in my body. But for a second, I thought I was the one lying on the floor, defeated.
I shrugged the thought off and stood up, made my way to her.
This is it, it was done and I knew they were all waiting for me to declare her a Santo now.
I offered her a hand. Which she accepted. And stood right next to me. I supported her weight, although I could very clearly see that she managed on her own. I turn to her. Her pretty face untouched, "Sabías qué proteger, ¿eh?" the words left my mouth with a small smile I did not intend offering.
"My face is my proudest possession." The pain was evident in her voice, but she proceeded to speak like it was nothing. "it's why you gave me that ride yesterday." Could be right, could be wrong. It's up to debate.
I turned back to my santos, a smile unwilling to depart my face. "Los santos" My voice strong and clear, grabbing all the attention offered. "my santos, by tradition, Aurora Hernandez is now a Santo."
I can hear cheers left and right. It's good that they were accepting it, although they were very clearly hesitant, I knew they were accepting it. They had to, because they trusted me.
"welcome to la familia, hermosa." Liam handed her a beer, of course he was the first to approach her. In a way I was glad she was familiar with at least one of the guys. But it was still somewhat disturbing that he pops out of nowhere like an annoying little mosca and try to talk to her all the time.
Aurora accepted and she sipped from the offered good. Her left arm still around my shoulder, and my right hand holding her up from her waist. I waited for her to put the bottle down, but she didn't. even after 5 seconds. Which made me look down at her. -she wasn't that shorter than me, but I was still taller- she was chugging the whole thing down in one take! And everyone started to cheer her on, naturally.
"Aurora, Aurora Aurora.."
She deadass drank the whole thing.
"let's take you inside, ok?" I whispered to her. the guys continued cheering as I dragged her inside.
We went to the kitchen, and I sat her slowly at the table. I've been doing this very often recently, first with Cesar a couple of days ago, and now with Aurora.
I grabbed an ice pack from the fridge, oddly enough we never run out of those. I handed it to her. then sat across from her. she looked exhausted. Not the hurt kind of exhausted, the... sleepy(?) kind of exhausted. This girl is always sleepy I swear to god, it's kind of cute. Because she's unbothered that she was just beaten, she's unbothered even if it hurts, and she just wants to sleep. Like a little kid.
"you ok?" I don't mean for the words to leave my mouth, but they do. And I look around in embarrassment that resulted in awkwardness. "yeah." She doesn't seem to notice. One hand was tapping on the screen of her phone her phone, god she's always busy, and the other was holding the ice pack over her exposed stomach. I didn't even notice she unbuttoned the flannel, but she did. My eyes trailed her skin, the beautifully worn ecru was now ruined. I recalled how flawless the skin on her ribs looked last night. She was gorgeous. But now her skin wasn't so intact. It was smeared by green and purple. She looked sick. But she sure as hell didn't act like it. What a hyna.
"Spooky." She called; I instantly look up to her face. She looked deep in thought, but she snapped out of it and turned her phone off. I waited for her patiently to talk. "can I ask for a favour? Now that we're family." I can't tell if she's being sarcastic or not. But yeah, my homies are family. I'd do whatever I can to help them. Not sure if she's a homie though. Not yet. It's true that I only met her yesterday, but a lot did happen in the span of 24 hours. A lot.
"depends." Yeah, im not gonna give her my kidney, not yet.
"I have my stuff in this one hotel." Ok. She needs her stuff. Can't be that difficult. I wait for her to continue, but my focus shifts as my eyes wander around the room.
"And I want to get them."
"That's fine. We can give you a ride and then come back and drop everything at your new house Cuchillios set for you." I don't emphasize on anything. My words leave my mouth smoothly.
"It's just around the block." I can eye the said house from where I'm sitting. Yes, it was so close I see it from the window of my own kitchen.
"No. You don't get it." What?
"Im not going, you're going. With your homies." Ok, what exactly is she trying to get across. Because I swear to god, every second with this girl is like an internal fight within me. It's me fighting me, a side of me is so irritated that she's speaking to me with such a cocky tone, knowing very well I run shit here. And a part of me just pities her. But that soft part is fading off.
"Listen, you want your stuff you go get your stuff." I suddenly realize what Cuchillios meant by 'princess treatment'. And it made sense how ungrateful she looked the whole night last night, when I was doing her favors left and right. It also made sense how messy she was, and how moody.
"No. You are getting my stuff from my hotel room and will work on protecting me." The fuck is wrong with this hyna?
She always has some sort of twist.
This chick ain't shit, she isn't strong and fearless like I assumed.
One last time, I was wrong to assume.
Aurora was nothing but an agitating, spoiled brat.
She is rude. She was not badass for screaming whenever she received a call, not badass for her savage comebacks. She was nothing but a child. She wasn't a chola, she was a nepo-baby with a gangster twist.
I don't care if I'm wrong about her, anymore. This is my perception of Aurora.
And I won't tolerate her being a santo.