"So, I grew up in the country," I started to say to Leah, as we sat together on the couch in her apartment. "I have four siblings: three sisters and a brother."
"Yeah, I remember: Finn, Darcy, Bindi and... I can't remember the last."
"Eden."
"Yes, Eden," Leah repeated.
"Yeah, so I told you that Darcy and Bindi left home when they turned 18, and Eden went off to boarding school when she was in year 10..."
"Yeah..."
"Well, I never really told you why," I said.
"I'm getting scared," Leah soon added, turning her body towards me, and crossing her legs onto the couch.
"I- it's not a pretty story." I looked towards my feet as I started to tell her: tell her the story of abuse. "My dad... he wasn't a good person. He would drink and drink and drink, and people became punching bags."
"Holy shit." Leah grabbed my hand, but I didn't reciprocate. I knew I just needed to get it out, before anything else.
"Eden got it the worst. Finn and I were young; Mum would hide us in the closet. It was kind of an out of sight, out of mind kind of thing. If he couldn't see us, hopefully he wouldn't try to find us. But Eden, she wouldn't hide. She would stand up for herself. She would be a brick wall, trying to protect Mum, but she would just get the brunt of it. I remember her having black eyes and bruises up her arms constantly throughout my childhood. Soon, Mum had enough of it, and tried doing the right thing by sending her off to boarding school, but it kind of backfired."
"Because she never came back?" Leah questioned.
"Yeah, that, and also, Mum never really had contact with her again. They lost their relationship, and so too did Finn and I. I don't know where Eden is, and neither does Mum, or Finn, or anyone really."
"Jesus christ," Leah said, looking down at the ground, and turning her head away. "I don't really know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything," I replied, inching closer towards her.
"When you moved to Sydney," Leah started to say, "your mum left him, right?"
"Yeah. We left in the middle of the night, and I have refused to see him since. Darcy and Bindi saw him, and I think Finn did too. Mum tried to go through a period of forgiving him, but he did the exact same thing apparently. But now, thankfully, nothing can ever happen again." Leah sighed, as if she was thankful for that, but then, I saw her face shift.
"Wait, why?" Leah then asked. "Why can't anything ever happen again?" I knew this question would come up.
"He died," I soon said. "In December."
"Holy shit," Leah replied. "Wow, okay..."
"Yeah, that's why I went home, and missed the Asian Cup."
"I thought it was because of..."
"Ellie? No no, definitely not Ellie. I wouldn't have missed a tournament because of a break up, even if it was painful." Leah nodded her head, agreeing with what I had just said.
"Was there like... a funeral?" Leah asked.
"There was; I didn't go through. Couldn't bring myself to honour a man's life who was never honourable to us."
"That's understandable."
"I'm just so pissed at the moment," I soon said, laying against the couch, my head resting on the material.
"Why?" Leah asked, leaning against it too, and looking me right in the eye.
"I saw Darcy, when I played the game against New Zealand. She came and saw me, and we were going to get coffee and everything."
"That's great, right?" Leah questioned.
"I thought so," I answered. "I was so excited to see her, and see her little ones. I had met her eldest, but not the younger two. But, when I saw them, and she told me their names... she named her kid after him."
"After your dad?" Leah confirmed.
"Yeah, she named her child after that abusive, alcoholic monster of a person." I clenched my fists as I thought of this. How could she do that? Why would she do that? "Leah, all I know, is that kid, for the rest of his life, is going to walk around with the name Mick thinking its so cool, and such bonding experience being named after his grandfather, when in reality, he is named after the worst person I have ever come across in my life." Leah grabbed my hand, and brought me closer to her, my head resting against her chest.
"Did she say why?"
"She said, and I quote: 'just because he was awful to you, he was a father to me'."
"Shit..."
"Leah, I just- why would she do that? Why?"
"I don't think we can question other people's choices," Leah soon responded, after thinking for a moment. "However, what we can do is be the bigger person. You are an incredible person, Tipp, and despite all the shit that you have just told me, you are still that incredible person. Don't let someone else's actions affect how you treat and see the world." She was right; of course she was.
At that moment, I saw her. I saw Leah. Her beautiful eyes, and kind heart were pouring out to me. I knew that, throughout anything, it was her. It would be her.
"I love you," I said, out of the blue. I knew it caught her slightly off guard, and at that moment, I was scared. Had I said it too soon? Was I too premature? Did I ruin everything? "Sorry," I soon said, "I just meant-"
"No," Leah interrupted me. "I love you too." I smiled to myself, leaning over to her, pressing my lips against Leah's. She grabbed the back of my neck, leaning deeper into our kiss. Everything felt right about her, and me.
A few days passed, and we were still vying for the League title. We knew we could do it. We knew it was possible. We just needed Chelsea to drop some points, and then we could pounce. If they kept going the way they were, we weren't going to get it. But I was optimistic; I was hopeful.
A few days later, I had a message from Finn.
Finn: can we call soon? Gotta plan some wedding details with u!
Tipp: yeah i guess....
Finn: still mad at me?
Tipp: kind of
Finn: really?
Tipp: fine not really, but being mad at u is fun so
Finn: ugh you're annoying
Tipp: right back at u
Finn: call tonight?
Tipp: your tonight or my tonight?
Finn: my tonight, ur morning
Tipp: fine... but ill probs be asleep so ring twice x
Finn: you're so annoying
Tipp: you've said that already...
I smiled at the messages with my brother. Throughout everything, and even when I was mad at him, I knew that everything would be okay soon. I knew that we would always be there for each other. It was him and me, always.
We won our next league game against Everton. We had travelled up to Liverpool, and pulled a 3-0 win. We stayed a night up in Liverpool, and we would head back down the next morning.
I was rooming with Frida, and as we arrived at the hotel, she crashed straight away, obviously exhausted after the game we had just done.
I lay in bed, wide awake, however. I was itching to go find her, and be with her. Instead, I just messaged her.
Tipp: what are you doing right now?
Leah: listening to beth snore
Tipp: hmm i have a better idea
Leah: i'm all ears
Tipp: meet in the hallway... two mins
I quickly grabbed my jacket, and went out to meet her. Her room was a few doors down from mine, and even though we were allowed to leave the room, we didn't want anyone to know that we were at midnight.
I grabbed her hand, and without saying a word, led her to the elevator.
"Where are we going?" she asked, as the elevator was moving upwards.
"I did a little exploring today..."
"Of course you did," Leah laughed.
"And... I found something kinda cute." She smiled as we reached the top 25th floor, and both walked out. I opened a few doors, soon finding what I wanted to show her.
"Holy shit, why did they not tell us about this?" Leah said, as I showed her the indoor pool that was glowing in the moonlight.
"Guess they didn't want 26 footballers hogging the pool," I laughed, taking my jumper off.
"Are you...?" Leah said, as I took my pants off.
"Going for a swim? Fuck yeah," I responded, taking my shirt off too, left only in my small crop top and underwear. I smiled at her, before turning around and jumping into the pool, in the most ungraceful manner one could.
"Is it cold?" Leah asked.
"Um...no!" I said, obviously lying.
"You're such a bad liar," Leah responded. She looked at me in the pool, my hair now drenched and resembling more of a brown than an auburn.
"You coming?" I said, as I floated in the water.
"I can't believe I am going swimming in a cold pool at midnight."
"It's called living," I joked, splashing some water, as she took her own shirt and pyjama pants off. "Hottie!" I called out. She blushed slightly, before walking into the pool, slowly.
"It's cold! I can't!" But I wouldn't take no for an answer, and I soon grabbed her hand, pulling her into the pool.
"See, it's not too bad," I said to her, as I wrapped my legs around her body. She held me tight, shivering slightly.
"I guess it's not too bad," she repeated, putting her hand on my chin, and her other hand resting on my lower back. I leant back, slightly, my legs still wrapped around hers, as my head was in the water. I felt her softly kiss my sternum, and something about that felt so intimate. So close.
I lifted my head soon out of the water, before placing a kiss again on her lips, and hugging my body closer to hers. My white crop top was soon going see through, but I didn't care. It was just her and me, no one else. No one more.
Soon, my body was pressed against the side of the pool, Leah's torso pushing against my own. Her hand found the elastic of my underwear, and even though this was not the intention of why I brought us up here, it all felt so right, and good. As if, all my worries and thoughts dissipated whenever I was with her and she was with me.
"Leah," I said, in between breaths.
"Yeah?" she responded, kissing my neck, and then my collarbone.
"I- I just- I-"
"I know," Leah answered. "Me too."
After what seemed like an eternity and only a minute at the same time, Leah and I knew we should head back down, knowing we needed sleep before heading back on the bus tomorrow.
She dropped me at my door, and I kissed her softly, before going back inside. I tried closing the door as quietly as I could, but when I walked inside, Frida started to speak.
"So, you sneak out, do you?" Frida joked.
"Maybe," I replied, laughing. She turned on the light, before switching it back off.
"Put dry clothes on," she said, acting like a mother. "And dry your hair before you sleep otherwise you'll get a cold."
"Will do," I said, laughing, before I heard her fall back into a deep, nice sleep.
The next morning, I woke to the sound of not my alarm for 8am but rather Finn, ringing at quarter to 8.
"What?" I said, into the face time.
"We said we would ring!" he replied.
"Ugh, does it have to be now?" I asked.
"Yes," he answered.
"I'm going to be on a bus in an hour. Can I not call you then?"
"But-"
"Finn, I'm hanging up in 5 secs... yes or no?"
"Fine!"
"Make sure Jemma is there. I want to talk to her more than you anyways." I then hung up the phone, falling back asleep for the 15 mins I still had.
Frida woke me up, as I kept snoozing my alarm.
"Now, I know you haven't had much sleep, but girl, we gotta go," she said, sitting on the side of my bed.
"What time is it?" I asked.
"8:30," she replied. "You have 15 minutes." I soon got alarmed, waking up and getting out of bed.
I was ready to leave by 9, but very tired. I had always been someone who needed a lot of sleep, not wanting to and also not liking to survive off little hours.
As we waited for the bus outside, I sat beside Leah, my head resting on her shoulder.
"Tired?" she asked me, obviously not that exhausted herself.
"Yes," I laughed.
"We didn't get back to the room until three," Leah said.
"Holy shit, I didn't realise it was that late," I replied, smiling softly.
"Yeah... three hours in the pool. My hands were very wrinkly afterwards." I chuckled as she said this, my head still resting on her shoulder.
We soon got onto the bus, and I sat on the window, with Leah beside me. I knew I had to call Finn before he got too mad.
"Right, I'm calling," I said into the FaceTime.
"I really thought you wouldn't."
"Hey!" I retorted. "I am reliable."
"Sure, sure," he replied. He soon went through some wedding details with me: date, location, when I should try to arrive home by.
"You bringing someone?" he then asked. I turned to Leah, muting my camera for a moment.
"So..." I soon said. "You still want to come to the wedding with me?" She looked at me, smiling for a moment.
"I wouldn't want to do anything else," she answered. I then unmuted Finn.
"Yep, I'm bringing someone," I replied.
"Doesn't happen to be a certain English captain does it?" he joked.
"Maybe," I responded.
"Well, that sounds good. I'll get Jem to add her to the list. Also, as Best Woman, do you want to wear a suit or a dress?"
"I don't really care," I responded.
"Well, you pick," Finn insisted.
"Finn, I don't care," I replied.
"And you think I do?" he asked.
"Just ask Jem, she'll tell you what I should do," I laughed.
"Alright, will do."
I chatted to Finn for a bit longer, before I knew I needed rest before arriving back in North London.
"Alright, well, talk to you later," Finn soon said.
"Yep, bye," I said.
"Hold up," he then said, "one more thing."
"Shoot," I replied.
"I want to invite Eden," he said.
"Yeah but-"
"I know, I know, but I think I found her, and Tipp, this is kind of wild if it's true."
"You're scaring me," I said.
"Don't be scared, but prepare to be fucking shocked."