[if you remember the au i talked about in stonebreaker, this is a prequel to the story that would never be in the book if i ever get around to actually write it all. so yeah anyway it just was on my mind all day today so...]
✰
Kai's eyes scanned the room. Servants were already taking care of all the mess that was left behind – plates and trays with leftover food scattered all around the tables, empty glasses and goblets, stained tablecloths...
The band was still there, their instruments still ready if there was a reason for them to play.
Which there wasn't. It was late, the ball was long over and none of the guests stayed behind. There was just the king, his personal guard, the band and the servants. Who could be possibly dancing at this hour in the middle of the unpleasant mess?
"Dance with me," Kai told his guard, making him break the statue-like stance. On one hand, it was admirable how dedicated he was to his job. On the other, Kai was quite disappointed for some unknown reason. He had several personal guards and he paid them as much mind as he paid everyone else. But Cole... there was something strange about him.
Kai tried to explain it as pure curiosity. After all, Cole was the only Shintarian he had met.
But his interest seemed to stem from something else. He didn't think about Shintaro when he thought about, looked at, or spoke with Cole. It was the last thing on his mind.
He wanted him to talk to him without having to initiate the conversation. He wanted to spend time with him – and not just be in his presence because it was his duty.
"I don't believe that's in my description of work," Cole replied curtly, having looked away from Kai.
"But I want to dance with you."
"There isn't even music. Not to mention you should be going into your chambers and not roaming around like this at such a late hour."
"I'm not a little prince, you know?" Cole sent another glance his way and huffed. Kai wanted to break the walls again, just as he had done several times before. Why did he have to build them back up each and every time?
Kai turned to the band and waved at them. They seemed to be confused by his request but obliged – because it was their job, just like everyone else's. The only person who disobeyed him was Cole – if refusing to dance could be considered disobeying. Well, it wasn't obeying the king's orders, that is for sure.
"Dance with me," he said again, putting emphasis on his tone to show it wasn't a question. And Cole sighed and followed him.
Of course, it was not going to be the best dance due to the armour that surely was uncomfortable to move like so in. Kai hated it. It felt like another wall and he could not get rid of that one unless he wanted to endanger him. Which was the last thing Kai would ever wish for.
So, even though he could not feel his hand the way he would like to, he held it and took the lead. Several of the torches were extinguished with the end of the ball but Kai still felt warm and light inside when Cole put his other hand on his waist just like he did.
The music was louder than before, having no competition, no crowds to chatter over it. And yet, Kai still perceived barely any of it.
Their gazes were glued together, Kai searched for every small detail in Cole's eyes. He examined his face so many times, the bushy eyebrows, the lashes, the two-coloured eyes, the scar, the nose, the mouth, the hair, it was all burned into his mind already and despite all that, there was always another detail to be discovered.
Many famous and unknown artists have found their way to the court and created masterpieces right in front of Kai's eyes. They captured mundane things and the most beautiful sights like children captured fireflies into jars, however, the king was convinced there will never come one capable of capturing the essence of Cole's majestic beauty. No one will ever be able to come even near.
Many poets and singers came along as well, singing odes to secret loves, declaring their deepest feelings within a few lines, within a few rhymes. Hiding the simple truth behind colourful metaphors. Kai wished he was capable of the same thing. It appeared that whatever there was about Cole, it was impossible to capture with words. It was a curious fascination, it helped Kai open his eyes a little bit more.
"What do you think about me?" he asked. The everlasting roughness to his voice was forgotten just as the rest of their company was. Kai failed to notice how vulnerable he became in front of his servants, being too lost in his mesmerizing. Once again, Cole took over his mind. So easily, it was ridiculous. It was a good thing Cole was not trying to overthrow him and claim his kingdom.
Terrifying was the thought – which he heard somewhere deep down, a voice he had no idea about – that he wouldn't mind it happening if it was Cole. Whatever was happening was scary. But there still was something seductive about that fear.
"Is this some sort of a test? Prevention or something?"
"Nothing like that, I'm just curious," Kai replied, careful not to show his enjoyment from his wary looks.
"Strange question to ask out of pure curiosity."
"Is it really that strange or do you just not want to answer?" His eyes never looked away from Cole's as he glanced down at their feet and huffed.
"I think you're not the worst king I've served yet." The last word stung. Yet. An unpleasant promise of leaving. It might not be soon, it might be in a few years, however, Kai was not willing to give him up. Cole belonged there with him. He belonged by his side.
Kai hummed, chewed on his lip.
"I can't even be flattered by such a lame response."
"Well, it's the best you will get from me."
Rolling his eyes, Kai looked away, observed everyone else in the room just to avoid looking back into Cole's eyes. Apparently, tonight wasn't going to be one of the times he gets to peek over those sturdy walls he keeps carefully intact. Suddenly he lost his interest and the last bit of energy decided to leave as well.
Kai fought back a yawn. Cole registered it nevertheless.
"You should just go to sleep, Your Majesty."
"Who are you to tell me what to do?"
"For someone who claims to be a powerful adult, you sure do behave like a child at times."
It was Kai's turn to huff. He let go of Cole and waved at the band, who stopped the music right away, sending the castle to silence, just as the night sends it to darkness.
It was dark and Kai was tired.
He went to go to his chamber without sparing another glance Cole's way. He will follow him no matter what and the second pair of steps echoing through the halls were enough of proof that there was no change even tonight. And despite the eternal need to have Cole close, Kai wished that he would leave him alone.
Despite his powerful position, asking him to leave was not on the table. Which was ridiculous – who would attack him in his own castle? Why the need for constant watch?
He entered his room, pushing the door open with such force, that the sound echoed not just through the halls but through his mind as well. Kai could not care less. He stood in the middle of his room and with crossed arms, he stared outside the window despite there being nothing to be seen. As if the darkness was telling him to go to sleep.
"I think you're just as self-absorbed and entitled as everyone else I've served," said Cole from behind him. Kai did not want to hear it, he had lost interest in the conversation ages ago. And yet it seemed Cole had more on his heart. "But I also believe there's more to you. I don't know what and I don't know how to figure you out, but I know there's way more to you. That it's just a ploy."
Kai scoffed.
"You asked, I answered."
"When are you planning on leaving?" There was a moment of silence. Kai imagined it was because Cole was caught off guard with his question. With him knowing.
"By summer solstice."
This time it was Kai who took his time to respond.
"That's soon."
"I'm not one to stay in one place for too long."
Kai would've preferred to spend the night thinking about various ways how to keep Cole by his side, how to stop him from leaving but the moment his head hit the pillow, he fell asleep. Just like every time.