"कोशिश बहुत की, कि राज़- ए - मोहब्बत बयां ना हो,
मुमकिन कहा था की आग लगे और धुआं न हो!!"
Space
"Nandini, ruko!"
Nandini who was walking towards the library to get a few books, halted on her steps hearing Mukti's voice. She turned to saw Mukti walking towards her with Navya. She adjusted the strap of her bag and looked at them, who now were standing infront of her.
Mukti: Hey!!
Nandini: Hi!
Navya: Hello Nandini, I am Navya.
Nandini mouthed a hello and nodded her head. Seeing her so reserved both girls looked at each other.
Navya: By the way, you were going to library?
Nandini:(nodding her head) Yeah!
Mukti: Oh! Then you should thank us, because we saved your time.
Nandini:(confused) Huh?
Navya:(chuckling) Arre! She meant that, we went to library ten minutes ago, and some books arrangements is going there, so no student is allowed for two hour.
Nandini made an Oh face and smiled a little at them.
Navya: How's your project going on by the way?
Nandini:(nodding) Good.
She was confused as to why these both are talking to her. Because as much as she have heard from rumours Fab Five rarely talks with any other student on their own, and especially Mukti and Navya. She looked at Mukti when she spoke...
Mukti: Oh that reminds me Nandini, tomorrow we will focus on the research thing okay? So take your time out from your lectures and meet us in the garden area at 12 okay?
Nandini nodded and both girls bid bye to her and Nandini decided to pick her daughter early today, as she was free only. So she left the college premises still in some thoughts.
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Navya: I think she is Introvert Muku!!
Mukti:(nodding) Yeah! She rarely speaks on her own in group discussion too. But yes, she is quite intelligent.
Navya: But, she looks so innocent yet so brave no?
Mukti:(chuckling) You reading faces or what?
Navya:(smiling) No! I just can feel it. She gives me those vibes you know!
Mukti:(hugging her sideways) Yeah, her vibes are actually positive.
Navya: But I guess it will take some time for us to be her friends.
Mukti: Koi naa! Manik ke lie kuch bhi!
(It's okay! Anything for Manik)
Both laughed and hi-fied each other before entering in the Jam room.
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Cafe Aurora -
Kabir: Oyee Manik baba!! Stop searching for her, she won't come here everyday bro.
Manik looked at Kabir and made a bad face.
Well currently it was evening and Fab Five were seated in the cafe, enjoying some spare time. And since the time Manik entered he was looking here and there for His Princess but sulked when saw her nowhere.
Manik: I know. I just thought that maybe she was also a daily customer.
Abhi:(snickered) She would be just three Manik. Regular customer at a cafe? Seriously?
Manik: Yeah whatever!
And they five started chit chatting when heard the waitress asking for their order. Manik looked above and was surprised to saw Nandini there.
While Nandini was standing there with a blank face. She had saw Fab Five sitting there, but she wasn't embarrassed, she can never be of doing a work which is helping her in educating her child.
Navya:(surprised) Nandini! You . You work here?
Nandini just nodded her head and again asked for their order. They came out of their trance and ordered for five coffee and cheesecakes. She noted down the order and giving them a formal smile left from there.
But in all this she could feel Manik's constant gaze on her, but she didn't looked at him. She herself didn't knew why? She came back in the kitchen and saw her daughter there now playing with cube, which Nandini got for her today.
Today, two waitress were absent and hence Nandini alongwith baking have to handle the serving work too. Anahita was settled in the kitchen silently and would grin whenever her mother would come to her.
Anahita: Mimi!! Sheee. I soled the cub.
(See, i solved the cube)
Nandini looked surprised and so did the chef.
Nandini: You did this so soon bache!
Anahita grinned and nodded her head.
Chef: She is such a smart kid Nandini.
Nandini just nodded with a smile and kissed Anahita's forehead who grinned back at her.
Meanwhile, on Fab Five's table it was silence for two minutes after Nandini left.
Cabir: C'mon guys, why so silent?
Mukti: Cabir!! Didn't you saw it? It was Nandini. I mean she works here?
Abhi: Mukti!! So what? She must have some personal issues. We shouldn't judge her.
Navya: We aren't judging her Abhi. Its just, we were surprised to saw her here like this.
Manik: Guys! Leave it. We shouldn't interfere in anyone's life, yeah?
All four nodded and got busy in their conversations, and soon their orders arrived, but this time it was other waiter. Manik would look at Nandini whenever she would come out of the kitchen area to attend other customers. And soon Fab Five were done and left the cafe, in the way Manik waved a bye to Nandini making her lips twitch a little, as he looked like a kid who was waving bye.
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"Nandini please naaa!!! Pretty please!!!!!"
"Tsk!! What do you wanna know Manik?"
"Your thoughts."
"I'm busy Manik."
"Yeah I can practically see how busy you are, in dusting off the non existent dust from the books, no?"
Nandini looked at Manik with a blank face and he just sarcastically smiled at her making her frow. And she finally took a seat infront of him making him grin at which her lips too twitched a little.
"Now tell me."
"Your thoughts on 13 reasons why!To be exact on the topic suicide."
It's been two months after Fab Five got to know about Nandini working as a part time baker in that cafe. And things haven't changed drastically just some little bit changes. Like, now Nandini doesn't feel very much uncomfortable with Fab Five's presence around her. Although she isn't completely friendly with them, but yes she is comfortable enough to initiate talks with them.
But with Manik she is more comfortable. Although, again, she is not super friendly with Manik but somehow she feels safe around him, which is she herself not known off.
And since Manik spends almost whole day of his weekend in the Books Cafe where she works, she kinda spends more time with him. Though most of the the time she would be busy doing her work and he reading some book. But they both have kinda developed this habit of sharing their thoughts on the book after Manik finish reading it. Because apparently, Nandini have read almost every book present there.
And same is happening today. It's Sunday afternoon, and Manik just finished reading 13 reasons why. And he was too touched with the book. But it was not book or its story which was troubling him it was this topic- Suicide that was playing with his thoughts. And he wanted to hear Nandini's thoughts on this topic. Because he kind of have this feeling that she can explain this much better.
Even he doesn't know why!!
Maybe because she explains every topic so beautifully to him that he waits to finish reading his book and talk with her.
Isn't that the only reason that he comes so much more frequently in this book cafe?
Hell Yes!!
And Is he denying this simple fact?
Hah! Naah!!
"Isn't this too deep?" Nandini asked taking the book in her hand and caressing it's cover.
"You know Nandini, since childhood I've enjoyed living my life. I've a family to die for. They all love me to the moon and back and it's vice-versa. My family has always provided me with everything I ever asked for, but at the same time they've taught me to stay grounded. In short my life has always been happy and cheerful. I won't say that I had faced no problems but nothing that I couldn't handle.
… But I also know that's not with everyone. Everyone's life is not as simple and beautiful as mine. Mine is beautiful because I've this beautiful family and friends. Not everyone has them. Some have but don't acknowledge while some have whom their family don't acknowledge. Some have broken families or broken heart or broken hopes.
… And I know that I can never understand any of their pain. But Suicide? Is this the option anyway? What happen after that? Do all the problems just vanish in the air? I mean what's the use of taking this step if you're not even there to witness what good or bad it did to everyone else?"
Nandini looked at Manik who was surely disturbed with his thoughts. She smiled at his pure heart. She knows that he has always lived a happy life but the fact that he still understands other's pain makes her respect him more.
And he also knows that his thoughts aren't completely wrong. But as a person who has herself gone through that stage where she herself was going through the same thoughts, not because death was appealing but because taking breath was becoming difficult for her. So she knows exactly how the mind of a person works in such a situation.
She looked at him who was looking at her to find his answers. And looking at him she felt like she was looking at Anahita who was always curious to get her answer from her. And same is Manik, he always acts like Anahita whenever some thoughts are troubling him. She came out of her thoughts when he snapped his fingers.
"Bolo naaa kuch!!"
(Speak something)
"Manik you see, The so-called 'psychotically depressed' person, as people call them- who tries to kill herself doesn't do so out of quote 'hopelessness' or any abstract conviction that life's assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing…
…The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant…
…The variable here is the other terror, the fire's flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It's not desiring the fall; it's the terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling 'Don't!' and 'Hang on!', can understand the jump. Not really. You'd have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling."
Manik blinked his eyes hearing her and looked at her lost somewhere. He could feel her words. He could feel the feelings behind the words when she was uttering those. As if he could feel her going through her memory lane, where she was herself standing in that high flamed building and on the edge of the window.
And that thought only did something to him. That thought where he imagined her choosing death stirred something in him. And unknown to him a drop of tear fell from his eyes blurring his view.
Or maybe clearing his view!!
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♡A
I don't know but I feels too close to this chapter! Would be waiting for your review!
1954 words!