I wondered, as July drew to a close and the Gala Dinner approached fast, and with still no word from him, whether Draco would still be coming to Grimmauld Place for my birthday pre-drinks party. The invites had gone out before we went to Dublin and his parents had accepted gratefully so I assumed he would be accompanying with them. The invites had gone out to the same people who had been at Grimmauld Place to help with the garden. Additionally, there were a further fifteen, mostly staff from Hogwarts and other members of the Order of the Phoenix, including Oliver Woods, the Minister and his wife, Lee Jordan and Angelina Johnson, Dean and Seamus, and Charlie Weasley who was coming back from Romania. All had accepted the invitation.
I felt surprisingly calm about it, despite the resounding silence from Draco's quarter. And at least my dance lessons with Neville had come on substantially and I knew I'd be able to make my way through a number of formal dances so long as I didn't drink too much and forget what I was doing.
I finished the bedrooms and upstairs' bathrooms and then spent the build-up planning with Mr Kreacher and Nettie and Mellie. We arranged drinks and canapés for forty people and I ordered several boxes of champagne from Mr Kreacher's wine merchant on St James's Street. I found out about wine tastings too but didn't book anything. I knew, in my heart, it was because I wanted Draco with me, to help me and advise me. I trusted his taste and that he'd have some knowledge in these matters. I briefly wondered if I could approach Lucius but dithered and let the idea slip away.
Still, I Owled Ludo Bagman and sent a separate message to Draco to let him know that Ludo would meet him and to contact him direct about the best time. I didn't mention anything of our parting in Dublin nor did I mention I'd seen him in the park area in Grimmauld Place. I just kept the note business-like and short.
In addition to dealing with the party, finishing the remaining bedrooms and bathroom, and my mornings with Severus, I also met with Robert Ogden Jr.
He was, without a doubt, the most enthusiastic super-fan of Quidditch I'd ever met. Worse than bloody Ron, Blaise, and Dean combined. The meeting with Robert Ogden lasted all afternoon and I was grateful I had arranged to meet with Ron and Hermione that evening because I had a dreadful feeling he might have continued into the night. Still, it was worth it and I secured sponsorship from Ogdens for the Quidditch Home Nations Championship. As soon as I got home, I Flooed Hannah to let her know and asked if she could add the name to our logo. I hoped Draco would approve as I Owled another update, despite not getting a reply about Ludo Bagman.
Poor Mouse was certainly getting his exercise.
I just wished Draco would contact me and let me know what was going on. All I knew was he'd arrived back safely from Dublin but Luna couldn't tell me anymore. She just said he'd been very busy travelling to various places in the country and talking to stadiums. That's what she thought he was doing anyway.
'Are you okay?' Hermione asked as soon as she saw me. Then she pulled me into a gigantic hug and whispered, 'oh, Harry...' into my neck.
I held on like I didn't want to ever let go. I hadn't even realised how crap I felt and how shaken I'd been by the business with Johan too. It must have shown in my face.
She, Ron, and I sat at the kitchen table and drank together as Mr Kreacher cooked dinner. I felt their inquisitive gazes watching me.
'What's happened, mate?' Ron eventually asked.
'I don't know,' I sighed. 'I really don't know.'
'Luna says that Draco has been really withdrawn since he came back from Dublin. She says he looks ill... you do too...' Hermione said. 'Did something happen between you?'
I shrugged. I didn't know how to explain. But my thoughts ran away with themselves, mostly in worry about Draco.
'Who tried it on with who?' said Ron bluntly.
'Neither of us,' I said shocked. 'It's not like I'd do that to Draco, he's engaged to be married... and he's...' my voice faded. '...engaged to be married,' I finished feebly.
Both looked at me and didn't say anything.
'Aisling Kelly took us to a pub, right in the middle of Dublin, it was fine to start off with but then it got really busy... really, really busy, and then someone recognised me and it all went a bit mad. I had a panic attack. We made an escape to some park and we had a strange falling out because he'd taken me there to see these sculptures of this Irish poet and author. He thought I'd be interested because he was gay, only I was trying to get over my panic attack and it all went wrong. I haven't heard from him since.'
'Draco knows you're gay?' said Hermione.
'Yeah, I told him. I didn't want him finding out further down the line when we're properly in business together over this Quidditch thing. I didn't want him to be uncomfortable about it.'
'And he wasn't uncomfortable with the news, was he?' she asked.
'Not at all.'
Ron looked puzzled, 'I'm sure it will work out soon. I mean, you two had got pretty close, pretty quick and you really get each other so he'll get over it. Whatever it is.' He took a swig of his beer. 'I mean, you're not exactly going to be holding hands under the table one minute and enemies again the next.'
'We weren't holding hands!' I said.
'Well, no. But he had his hand on your leg and was helping ground you all through that conversation with Lucius and Minerva about N.E.W.T.s and teaching and what have you.'
'How do you know that?' I was horrified.
'Because, for those of us who know, we've all got eyes and you've got Luna hugging you on one side, covering for you, and Draco touching you up on the other and for the first time in forever you had entire conversation in front of all those people without upping and running away. It's a first in a long time, mate. And he's good for you and we can all see it.'
'Bloody Aurors being all observant and shit...' I mumbled. 'And he wasn't touching me up.'
'He can't stay away from you,' Ron said with a raised eyebrow. 'You can't stay away from each other.'
I knew Ron was right. 'That doesn't mean anything though,' I said.
I could tell Hermione was contemplating things. 'Maybe it does,' she said quietly. 'And that's a real problem for him because, as you say, he's engaged to be married. What's more, he's engaged to be married to someone he told us he doesn't like.'
'He's needs to talk to me...' I said, collapsing onto the table in frustration with my head in my arms.
'Maybe he can't,' said Hermione. 'Maybe he's scared as well. He'd be putting a lot on the line if he was open with you. Maybe it's you who needs to talk to him.'
I lifted my head and looked at her. 'And say what, exactly? Are you gay and have you got feelings for me?'
She rolled her eyes. 'Boys...' she sighed, 'all of you... you've all got the emotional range of a teaspoon and the communication skills of a turd...'
'Hermione!' Ron exclaimed, horrified.
At least I laughed for the first time since I'd returned from Dublin. That is, until I noticed Sirius, Remus, and my dad meandering around nonchalantly in a landscape picture I'd hung on the chimney breast in the Breakfast Room.
'No!' I said, standing up and pointing at them, my wand drawn. They tried to hide unsuccessfully behind a tree and in the long grass. 'No, no, no! You get back in your frames right now and if I find out that any of you have been leaving them again, I'll have to set up Imperturbable Charms on each of you. I will not have you sneaking around and listening in on my private conversations. Get out, now!'
We watched them slink out of the frame.
'I don't know what possessed me,' I muttered. 'And I can't get rid of them now. I mean, imagine actually putting a portrait of my mum and dad on the bonfire. I can't do it...'
'They're just looking out for you, Harry. They care,' said Hermione.
'I know... I know...'
'What are you going to do about Draco?' she asked.
'I don't know what to do. I've written a few times. Just brief Owls about the Championship. And he came here but that was another monumental cock up. Merlin knows what he thinks now.'
'What happened?' Hermione asked gently.
'I was upstairs, doing the last bedroom and glanced out of the window, he was sitting on a bench in the square's gardens, watching the house, so I went down to meet him and talk. But you know how opening the front door exposes the house. Someone I'd met when travelling was waiting for me. He flung himself at me, hugging me, inviting himself in. By the time I'd looked back to Draco, he'd Apparated away.'
'Did Draco know about this man?'
'As in, did Draco know that I'd been in a relationship with him when we'd travelled together? Yes. Did he know I no longer have any feelings for the man? No, we didn't discuss it. I wasn't even particularly in love with Johan, we just got on, very well, and he was very attractive when the world was just about sunshine, sightseeing, and sunsets. Life was different away from all the madness here. He didn't know who I was and that felt good. But then he turned up here, unannounced. He'd staked out the square for a couple of days and when I opened my front door, he pounced on me. Literally. Invited himself in. Wanted to stay. Wanted to come to the Gala Dinner as my plus one. No doubt wanted to scrounge off my fame. Certainly sounded like it. He didn't even know who Voldemort was, just found out I was famous when he got to Britain and saw the biographies and my picture all over the Press for something or another—'
'Probably that Witch Weekly article that's selling out everywhere,' said Ron. 'Apparently, they can't print them quick enough. Something to do with that sultry front cover picture—'
'Oh fuck off, Ron,' I grimaced.
'It's alright, mate, we all know that's your angry-sulky face and you're clearly hating every minute of it. It can't be helped that half the population misread that into some kind of personal "come-to-bed" seductive pose meant specifically for them. I mean, it's not as if history hasn't taught us how people can get brainwashed into being misty-eyed over fame and fortune. Look at all that worship of that wanker Lockhart—'
'Do not even put me and that fucker in the same sentence as a comparison, Weasley...' I growled.
'The point is, Harry,' Hermione squeaked and blushing bright red, 'Ron's reading you correctly and sympathising with the situation.'
I wonder if Ron had realised he'd called out his own girlfriend's behaviour amongst the idiocy over Lockhart.
'What happened to this Johan-bloke?' said Ron, swiftly changing the subject.
'Well, turns out the man's an irritating and oblivious tosser—'
'More oblivious than you?' teased Ron.
I raised a disapproving eyebrow. 'Did you say you wanted to stay here after the Gala Dinner to avoid having to catch the Knight Bus back to Devon?' I said pointedly.
Ron rolled his eyes, knowing the threat was hollow.
I continued, 'he didn't get the hint that I didn't want him here and I wasn't going to pick up where we left off some eighteen months ago when we were on the other side of the world and life was very different. He invited himself to stay and wasn't getting the message so I offered to show him around the house. Though I took the "wind-up-Lucius-Malfoy" approach and told him we couldn't possibly go up to the last two floors or the attic due to the Inferius, the Kappa, and the Boggart. He was already shitting himself before I led him straight up to The Portraits. Then they staged an intervention.'
Both Ron and Hermione were already grinning.
'Oh god!' said Hermione. 'What happened?'
'Well, he started off on a very bad footing because apparently the talking-portraits-thing is very British, not European. He didn't know how to take it. Then he managed to upset Walburga in his first sentence because he has this irritating habit of addressing everyone as "man", you know, in that doped-up, chilled kind of way. He's a free spirit, it's fine, but there's a time and a place. She retorted very haughtily and with utter disdain that she was not a man. Anyway, The Portraits realised something was up, maybe it was when I said that I'd best introduce them all, seeing as he'd invited himself to stay, and I said that I was sure they'd behave themselves. Even Severus requested to join the fray and left the Study to join Regulus in his frame. I introduced them all, particularly making sure I mentioned certain elements such as Death-Eaters and Sirius's criminal past and that Remus was a werewolf and Phineas N. was the Headmaster at Hogwarts. I also might have told a few white-lies when I said Phineas II was a highwayman and Eduardus was the famous pirate, Blackbeard.'
Ron and Hermione looked at me in astonishment.
'You've changed,' accused Ron.
'But Eduardus wouldn't say boo to a goose,' said Hermione.
'He's very good at interjecting "arghh" and "shiver me timbers" into the conversation. And you should have heard him throw a fit when Johan said Blackbeard's real name was Edward Teach. It was a very convincing performance. Add to that with Phineas II shooting pistol-fingers at Johan whenever they caught eyes, like it was an in-joke between them—'
'You're all mad,' said Ron.
'That was the general impression I was trying to achieve,' I grinned.
'And the intervention?' asked Hermione.
'A slow-building interview on why Johan considered himself good enough to be my husband. It was an amazing piece of work. It started off slowly with Walburga wanting to know where he was from, his family and, of course, his bloodline. Phineas N. asking which school he went to and what grades he achieved. There was some low-grade boasting from dad about my Outstanding with a Valedictorian Designation in my Defence N.E.W.T.. Johan flunked out of his schooling with two O.W.L. equivalents and three unfinished N.E.W.T. equivalents but didn't have a good reason. Not like Fred and George at any rate. Severus wanted to know how capable Johan would be at standing by my side as I tackled Dark Creatures and the Dark Arts. Severus spelt it out quite clearly that anyone in my life would have to be adept at tackling such issues due to them becoming a certain target for revenge. Then Regie asked if he was interested in the Dark Arts and Curses at all and if not, why not. He said very nonchalantly, "of course, Harry is very keen on studying as many aspects of Dark Magic as he can, probably some of it bordering on playing with the dangerous and illegal. But I'm sure you won't mind his little experiments, most are quite harmless...".'
'Oh gods,' said Ron, failing to hide his smirking any longer. 'Does it get worse?'
'Yep. Eduardus asked if he'd ever been to sea or, as chipped in by Phineas II, robbed Muggles at wand-point or stolen anything in his life. They wanted to know whether he'd got any criminal records to be proud of, considering Sirius's and Severus's track records. Unfortunately for Johan, he was guilty of being in possession of dope as a teenager. You should have heard the hiss of disapproval. Regie shook his head in disappointment and sighed that it wasn't even for something properly Dark and if he was going to drop out of school, it should be for an Unforgiveable at the very least, if not murder. He pointed at Severus and said, "now he successfully AK'd one of the Headmasters of Hogwarts... that is something to talk about...". Then my dad and Sirius got involved. Dad wanted to know what sort of practical magic capabilities Johan had, Sirius wanted to know how many Dark Wizards Johan had killed or Horcruxes he'd destroyed, but they bickered between themselves as much as with Johan. All through that, Remus was actually foaming at the mouth and baring his teeth alarmingly. He kept actually growling and Eduardus is giving it his pirate talk and Phineas II is still shooting his pistol-fingers. Walburga then started on the alignment of magical families and it was back to the question of whether Johan's family was suitable. The direction the conversation was going in was now overt and the pressure was really mounting by this point. Particular as Walburga asked him directly whether he thought he was worthy of being Harry Potter's partner in life. I could tell Johan was feeling more and more overwhelmed and petrified. Especially when I mentioned that I would leave proposal for a few weeks, until after the Gala Dinner but I didn't want a long engagement though dad argued with me that we really shouldn't live in sin and should go straight to the Registry Office at the Ministry if Johan was going to stay. It was then that Charlus chipped in about the importance of heirs for both the Black and Potter Ancient Houses and what were Johan's views on having children. That was when Mum and Dorea piped up with questions about whether Johan had heard about the latest developments in male pregnancy magic at St Mungo's and whether Johan would be willing to bear my children—'
Ron could no longer contain his laughter. 'I'm guessing he didn't have the balls to call bullshit?'
'No,' I said with a smile. 'Well, he just didn't know if they were talking the truth or not. He was stuttering away and looking rather faint.'
'That's just cruel,' said Hermione, trying to maintain a serious face. 'The poor man was being bullied...'
'The "poor man" had just bullied his way into my house, having stalked me halfway across the world, and he was intending to scrounge off me and use my fame, despite my not-so-subtle hints that I wanted him to fuck off and he wasn't welcome.'
'I suppose it's a taste of his own medicine then...' she said cheerfully.
'Unfortunately, he won't remember it so there's not much of a lesson learnt. Anyway, it was then that Severus added a whole line about male birthing still not being completely resolved and that although they were trying to encourage natural births through the rectum, the resulting ripped anus and perineum had been extremely severe in all cases so far. Severus delivered the final part with a completely detached tone of voice, like he was teaching a lesson in the disadvantages of using Dittany in potions to first years; he said that as the perineum is responsible for covering the nerves a man's body uses in order to urinate or achieve an erection, that sort of damage had long-lasting if not permanent consequences. I almost expected him to send Johan away with homework. You know, write a 6" essay on the long-lasting consequences on the male body of a severely ripped arsehole...'
'Oh, sweet Merlin, I would love to have been a fly on the wall for that one,' wheezed Ron. 'What shade of white had he gone.'
I laughed. 'Paler than your t-shirt. I'll show you the memory one day. He got up hurriedly and accused us all of being completely bat-shit crazy, man. He thought I might be hiding a long-term plan to become a Dark-Wizard and take over the world and that all these talking portraits were a sign of evil enchantments. The two final cherries on the cake were Willow and Ziggy appearing, sopping wet, with a dead Grindylow that they dropped at my feet as a present—he doesn't like cats. And then the appearance of Iola who had decided that as she didn't like loud noises, tarring with honey and feathers was a suitable humiliating treatment from a poltergeist. Unfortunately, for Johan, he's petrified of ghosts. He fled but only after Iola had ruined one of my best goose-down pillows. Still, it's been the only positive thing to come out of the past few weeks.'
'I hope you Obliviated him?' said Ron, shaking his head.
'Of course.' I unconsciously twitched my fingers and decided not to say anything about the wandless part. 'He has no memory of me beyond being someone he met briefly while travelling. And absolutely no recollection of the events at Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place or of my address.'
'Well, your next step is to talk to Draco,' Hermione said matter-of-factly.
'I can't...' I said with a heavy sigh, 'when he's clearly not talking to me.'
***