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chapter twenty-four: blood, sweat, and
tears
{a/n:
yoyok was on an hour loop while i was writing this... so yk it's about to get bad. i hope you guys are prepared
:,,,)
enjoy! }
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ADAM SHOVED A SPOONFUL of Rasin Bran into his mouth, not allowing himself to chew before chugging down on a vanilla protein shake.
He swallowed, coughed, then did it again.
He had to finish his breakfast fast if he wanted to keep studying.
It was the following morning after the whole team fiasco. Adam was sitting at a bar desk in one of the main common rooms of the North building.
There was a notebook sprawled out in front of him, messy outlines of pen and pencil with plays and notes scattered across the pages.
Adam had been up the entire night, only running in five minutes of sleep from a cat-nap he took after working out in the gym at two in the morning. For the majority of those twelve hours, he was watching his tapes and studying all of the plays he's ever learned in his career, determained to keep them ingrained in his mind.
Obviously, he was aware this wasn't the best idea. Coach Beau specifically told him not to beat himself up, but he couldn't help it.
Who cares what Coach Beau thinks?
There was purple bags bruised under his eyes. His hair was messy, sticking in all different directions. Yawns fell from his mouth at lest every three minutes. Anyone who were to walk by and see him could easily tell he was sleep deprived.
Adam managed to finish he breakfast in three minutes. He pushed the styrofoam bowl and shaker bottle aside with his arm, not caring about the droplets of milk that's spilled from how harsh he was.
He wiped the corner of his mouth with his sleeve, sat in silence for a couple of seconds to reset himself, then got back to work.
Though, his concentration didn't last long. All his exhaustion eventually caught up to him, and he suddenly felt very dizzy— and just so out of it.
Adam pressed a few fingers to his temples, messaging them gently in an attempt to relieve the feeling, closing his eyes.
But when he finally opened them, he was back in the mind of his nine year old self. Sitting alone in his bedroom with tear stained cheeks, recovering over the unspoken pressure he was emotionally under while his ears still rung from his father's angry words.
It was the same feeling he had right now. He was pushing himself so far-- too far.
And it's only been a day.
Adam didn't even notice the tears that now ran down his face as he brought himself out of that odd hallucinated state. It was when he glanced down at his notebook, beaded tears slowly seeping into the paper— some swirling in with the pen markings.
He sniffled quietly, staring down at the pages.
Before he could even think, he slammed the notebook shut and chucked it hard against the wall beside him. He threw the hood from his black sweatshirt over his head, and buried his face deep into his arms, which were crossed and resting on the table.
Then, he started to cry.
All emotions he had bundled up flowed freely down his face.
He thought he'd finally made it. He thought this was the point he's been longing to reach for his whole career.
He thought he was on the path to greatness as last, somewhat telling himself that it's going to be easier now.
Adam was aware that a big part to how he was feeling was simply because of how over tried he was.
But still, he couldn't hold it in.
It was too much.
Julie happened to walk in the common room just a couple minutes later with two coffees in her hands, specifically looking for her favorite warm-up partner. She had ran into JJ earlier that morning in the cafe, and had asked if he's seen Adam. (The last time she saw him was when the rosters first came out.)
The boy had mentioned the last time he saw Adam in that study at around four in the morning, and there was a high chance he could still be there.
"He just looked so tired, but deep in thought at the same time. I tried talking to him but I don't think he even noticed me." JJ told her, and she immediately knew what was happening.
Julie's only ever seen this go down once at the Goodwill games-- after he hurt his wrist. He had completely broke down and stayed up a whole night, going through physical exercises on his wrist and trying different therapies on it in the span of those twelve hours. But of course, it was extremely painful and Gordon Bombay eventually found out.
The thing was, he was being so hard on himself where it drove him to go above and beyond.
So, it wasn't a surprise to see him hunched over in his chair, body trembling slightly as he softly cried. His head was bowed in against the table with his arms guarding it.
The girl sighed softly, approaching him slowly as she tried not to frighten him. Julie took a seat on the chair beside him. When she knew he was aware she was there, she gently began to rub his back with a gentle hand.
Adam lifted his head up and glanced at her momentarily before shamefully turning his head away.
She couldn't see him like this.
It was embarrassing.
"Adam?" The girl spoke carefully, afraid that he was going to break at any louder tone.
After a second, he turned back with his gaze down at the floor. He sniffled, then hastily rubbed his nose with a sleeve. But as he went to speak, his voice cracked and he felt his eyes begin to water again.
Julie reached over and delicately rested his head down on her shoulder. She caressed his head with both hands pressed against the open side of his cheek, which was dampened with early tears.
And then they sat there in silence.
Until Adam finally spoke.
"I already know what's going to happen, Jules." He choked a painful sob, and a whimper shruddered from the back of his throat.
"I've already lived through it, an-...and I don't wanna again."
Adam dug his face deeper into her shoulder as his cries became more prominent. He shook his head, muttering. "I don't wanna... I don't wanna!"
"Adam-"
"I've given everything!" The boy picked his head back up, now looking dead at her. His eyes were swollen red. "Everything!"
Julie placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. "It's okay. It's okay, just breathe..."
"I-I can't! Julie, I'm really freaking out." His heart was beating so fast she could almost hear it.
His breathing caught deep in his throat. His eyes widened and his mouth opened, but nothing came out besides a silent 'squeak'.
More tears.
"How could they just do this? Hockey is my whole fucking life. Everyone knows that!" He was almost yelling. "Hockey is mine! I've worked for this! I deserve the best!"
Julie couldn't help but internally smile.
He was finally acknowledging that he was good enough, which is something he's struggled with every since she's known him.
She wanted to help him so bad.
He did deserve everything.
"Yes you do!" She assured, matching the loudness of his own voice. "Yes you do, Banks. You earned everything you've got, and more!"
At that, Adam visibly started to collect himself. His body slowly began to stop shaking, and his breathing regulated. He swallowed down hard, as if he were swallowing sobs that were scratching at his throat.
Julie adjusted herself in her seat. She grasped both of his shoulders then, making sure he was focused on only her. "Listen, I have no clue as to why this is happening. It's pure shit, and there has to be a good reason. But just remember how fucking talented you are, okay? You've put your blood, sweat, and tears into this sport. Adam, no one else is capable of your abilities. Don't let anyone or something tell you otherwise. Everything you've worked for will be worth it, I promsie."
Adam nodded understandingly as more tears threatened to fall. He reached out and embraced her then; grateful that he was blessed with a friend like her. He let out a staggered breath he didn't even know he was holding as she wrapped her arms around him.
"You're the best, Jules." He rasped against her hair.
"And you're the greatest, Cake-eater." She pressed a sympathetic kiss to his cheek before backing away.
He sniffled once more before clearing his throat as he wiped away the tears on his face; a heavy feeling still on his chest.
Julie got up from her chair. She walked over and picked up his notebook from the floor. After returning it back to him, she helped him back up the rest of his things. "How about you go get some rest and we'll talk more later if you're feeling up to it. I've heard you've been in here all night."
Adam worriedly flickered his eyes to her. She could tell he was about to get all rattled up again. "What about practice? I can't just miss after what's been happening!"
"I'll cover for you." She said while throwing away the soggy, styrofoam cereal bowl.
"But-"
"Adam, you're going to go rest. You need it."
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VERA WAS RESTED CONTENTLY against a bookshelf. She was in the far corner of the library, flipping through one of her many textbooks in search for a homework answer she was stuck on.
Her back was leaned up against the wood. It was uncomfortable, but the rest of the tables were occupied.
Sure, there were other spots that could've potentially be comfier, but they were out in the open.
This spot was secluded. Perfect for studying.
And although it was a little dark since the shelf in front of her was blocking any light, it was nice as there weren't any distractions. She was able to get a lot of work done that she'd put off for a couple of days.
At least, she thought there weren't distractions.
Someone was suddenly standing in front of her, creating a shadow around her space. She thought maybe it was someone looking for a book so without lifting her eyes from her schoolwork, she moved her body to the side in hopes of clearing the way for the person.
But then, the person above her cleared their voice.
Vera glanced up, trying her best to ignore that gut-wrenching feeling as she locked eyes with Cher Bellucci.
"Hey!" The blonde yipped. Her mood seemed to be up today.
Vera managed to contain herself. She grinned warmly. "Hi...?"
Cher welcomed herself to the spot beside the brunette, taking a seat right next to her. Their knees were touching, and Vera could feel the girl's heavy, excited breathing on her neck.
She shifted her body a little, creating a couple inches between them.
"You looked kinda lonely so I thought I'd come talk to you." Cher explained. She grabbed Vera's human biology textbooks and began sifting through the pages, making weird faces at some of the anatomy descriptions.
Vera couldn't hold back making a disturbed face. Her nose wrinkled and lips tightened into a line.
Fortunately, Cher didn't see. She probably would've told her off.
"Uh, yeah... I was just doing some homework."
"Maybe I could help!" The blonde suggested.
Vera nervously laughed as she took the book from the odd girls' grasp, stowing it away behind her back protectively. "I was actually just finishing up." She lied. "Thanks for the offer, though."
"Oh... well that's okay because now we have some time to talk!"
Oh boy. Vera definitely didn't want to talk.
But before Vera could state anything opposing the idea, Cher began speaking.
"So, teams were announced! That's exciting!" She said, now getting quite giddy. It was awfully annoying. "Where did you end up placing? I made section three! You know, that one college team."
Cher? Made a college team?
No way.
Vera normally wasn't the type to get jealous about these things as she was usually placed there for a specific reason. She tried her best to seem unbothered, dismissing Cher's announcement with a shrug, but she couldn't get that vile feeling of 'not being good enough' off of her.
She's seen Cher play, and it was pretty decent to say the least.
But, was she really worse than her?
"I made JV." She mumbled quietly.
It seemed terribly wrong as she was deemed one of the top female players at the academy. The director told her himself! But she had accepted it as there's multiple students and they can only have so many teams.
But now with the thought Cher made a leading team, and it being a higher section, it was obvious something was wrong.
"Oh." Cher hissed pitifully. "That's upsetting. I've seen how hard you've worked, and I truly believe you're one of the best! But maybe I was wrong... oh well! There's always next year!"
What a bitch.
Vera anxiously chuckled. She began to collect all of her things, trying to pack them all into her backpack without going noticed by Cher.
It'd worked as the girl seemed too involved with herself-- mostly bragging about her placement.
The brunette managed to stand up and dust herself off. "Well, it was great talking with you, but I have to go. Practice is in a few."
Cher got up as well, eyebrows crinkling in slightly confusion. "JV doesn't have practice today? They wanted to focus on the higher teams. Like the one I'm on-"
"There's just a small meeting!" Vera had gotten so irritated that she'd raised her voice.
It had startled the blonde.
She sighed deeply while pinching the bridge of her nose. "Sorry, Cher, uh, I'm just tired." She mumbled, already beginning to back away.
Vera wanted to get out of her presence as soon as she could.
"It's alright. I get it." Cher nodded, taking a step towards Vera.
The girl swallowed down, hard. "Yeah, so, I should definitely go take a nap."
Cher nodded. "Oh yeah, definitely."
Nodding, Vera took a few more strides back and was now at the end of the row. She let out a trembled breath, grinning at the girl in front of her.
"It was nice talking to you. I'll see ya' around."
"You too, V!"
And without looking back, Vera booked it around the shelf and headed towards the doors.
Cher turned around on her toes with a haunting grin pulling on the corner's of her lips. She skipped off happily, knowing that she'd finally gotten under Vera's skin.
-
The brunette arrived at her dorm room ten minutes later out of breath. She had ran straight there without stopping, scarred with the feeling she was being followed by Cher.
There was something off about that girl. She just gave Vera a very disturbing feeling.
She had entered the room and shut the door behind her quite loudly. Upon noticing her roommate sitting on her bed, she absentmindedly began to rant about the interaction she had with Bellucci.
But she didn't get far as Julie had cut her off, shushing her.
Confused, Vera wrinkled her brows. "What?" She mouthed.
Julie extended a finger towards Vera's bed, then bringing it back up to her lips.
Vera tracked her friend's gaze to her bed, eyes widening when noticing that Adam Banks was fast asleep under her blankets.
"He's had quite the rough morning." Julie whispered, noticing the shocked look that had suddenly overtaken the brunette's face. "We didn't end up making it back to his dorm. I told him he could crash here for a couple of hours since we were closer."
Vera nodded slowly as she registered what was happening. She looked back at the boy then, not evening noticing how her body gravitated towards him. She found herself sitting on the edge, staring at his tear-stained face.
She glanced back at Julie. "What happened?" She spoke softly, hoping not to wake him.
"It's quite a story." The blonde started, but then stopped abruptly as something came to her mind. "Honestly, it might be better if he was the one explaining it. But I will say he was just cheated out of his potential."
Vera got upset after having an idea of what this was about. She scooted her body closer to him, her back now pressed against the headboard.
Her eyes couldn't help but continue wandering over his body. The way his leg was sticking out from the bottom of the covers.
How her childhood stuffed bunny was tucked between both of his arms. His light breathing.
The whole sight made her grin.
She leant down and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. When she backed away, she lightly brushed some pieces of hair out of his face.
Adam whimpered a little and began to stir, but once Vera began to soothingly rub his back in attempt to get him back to sleep, everything was calm. He slowly untangled his arms, suddenly wrapping them around one of her thighs— the bunny still tucked beneath his arm.
Vera gently cupped his cheek in her hand, tenderly brushing her thumb against his cheek.
"Sweet boy."
And, he too, smiled in his sleep as he melted into her touch.
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mari speaks!!
and again, not edited. i really need to go back and reread these past chapters in case i screwed up on something
oh, but, screaming. crying.
we all need a julie in our lives
and cher literally needs to be sent somewhere to get herself sorted out.
like wtf is she actually thinking?
but oh my gosh adam and vera are adorable. i cannot wait for them to be happy together
(we'll see a glimpse of that in the next chapter ;) i'll try not to keep you guys suffering for too long lmao)
thank you guys so much for all the support. like truly, i appreciate every single one of you who take their time to read this.
it means so much.
wherever you are, i hope you are blessed with a good day/night!
again, thank you!
-m
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