David was... pretty sure he couldn't take on four people on his own.
At least not four people who seemed to have kept a pretty good grip on their minds, if the fourth one's speaking was any indication.
He felt a shiver of fear mixed with anticipation run up his spine.
Yes, David probably couldn't take on four people at once. If he kept playing fair.
If he kept holding back.
His hand settled longingly on his knife, trying to keep track of the three still recovering and the fourth who had yet to attack. Unconsciously, his tongue wet his lips, which parted in a grin.
"Well, wouldn't you know it, I happen to know exactly where the kids are!" He told them with no little pep, "Isn't this our lucky day?"
"Alright," the fourth person, still in shadow, crossed their arms over their chest. "I get it. You're the pretender, aren't you? The one we were warned about. The one that won't stop until the world has ended." They stepped into the light, and David was surprised to see Officer Derek come clear, one of the beat cops who frequented the edges of the campground when Sal couldn't come up himself. He hadn't seen him since David had taken care of the whole incident with Nikki and Neil stumbling on a threat while looking for a mascot.
"New plan," the law enforcement officer sneered, "David first."
Well, good. David had been wondering how he'd get them away from camp. They were just on the other side of the counselors' cabin from the tents. Instead of letting his relief show, however, David forced a squeak and bolted for the woods. He heard Derek swear and the pounding of feet behind him.
Sneaking a peek back and nearly tripping for his efforts, David noted with relief that there were four chasers after him. He would have had to circle around if one of them had split off to search for the kids. Thank goodness they weren't quite as insidious as, say, Janette had been. David might not have known about her at all if he hadn't lingered- whoop.
David ducked a tree branch and rolled, jumping to his feet at the end and grabbing the trunk of a young tree. He swung around it, momentum intact, and slammed his knee into the fastest of the four's stomach. When they crumpled, he stomped a foot down on the back of their neck, and used the force to push himself to the side as the next quickest lunged at him.
Then his knife was free.
There was something luxuriant about a spray of blood. Whether it misted or spurted or gushed, it was like liquid life dripping down his face. Always an indulgence. The one on the ground screamed with rage as they took in the wound Second Fastest was futilely pawing at across their throat. Fastest made it to their feet just as Second Fastest dropped off theirs and their lunge ended with David's knife buried in their gut. The screaming joined with crying as David jerked it to the side, ignoring how Fastest scrabbled at his shoulders for balance, abandoning the punching in favor of attempting to remain standing. It was almost funny.
It was funny.
With a laugh, David wrapped an arm around their waist, pushing the knife in deeper with his other hand, and spun a half circle, as if they were dancing together. The first measures of a song escaped him in a pleased hum. Of course, when Third caught up, he had to throw his partially conscious dance partner at them to trip them up. Not the best dancing etiquette.
It also stopped the steady trickle of blood down his arm and he rather wanted it back.
They shouldn't have chased him.
Or, they should, at least, have kept to a group. None of this mindless running that had split them up in the first place. Then, they might have had a chance.
David was sure to explain this to Third a minute later, when he was dragging his knife down their jugular, tracing the vein with eerie precision and splitting it open lengthwise with a purely satisfying torrent of accompanying blood, washing over his hands and dripping down his skin. The only reason he didn't lick his lips clean of spray was because he didn't want to admit to himself he was that far gone.
Now, there was only the fourth.
And Fourth appeared to have thought better of the whole throw yourself at David and see what happens strategy.
"You're a monster," they said, from somewhere in the shadows, and David recognized Derek's voice. He readjusted his grip on his dripping knife and listened, hoping to catch the sound of Derek's movement. "You're one of them, aren't you? One they've already let through."
This time the voice sounded from David's other side. There was no way Derek had crossed over that quickly. He remembered, abruptly, that Derek had always been proud of his ventriloquist dummy to the point of occasionally bringing it with him on duty and stifled a groan. He could throw his voice.
"As far as I know, I'm human, buddy," David informed him, searching the forest around himself carefully. There was no response. In fact, if David didn't know any better, he'd say Derek might have turned tail- yep, there was the sound of someone trampling through the brush, farther away than he would have expected to find it. Zeroing in on the sound, he ducked and weaved through the forest, following the trail until - "Oh, shi-" he cut himself off and retreated back into the darkness of the forest's edge. Gwen was standing outside, lifting the bowl he'd thrown from the ground with a worried expression.
David looked down at his bloodied outfit. Felt its slow crawl in his hair and on his face as it began to dry. Or congeal, in some places. He'd have to go around.
Fourth seemed to have had the same idea, luckily, as Gwen wasn't running off to call the police because a strange man had accosted her. Fo- Derek hadn't been into the camp very often, and never over to this far side, so he couldn't know where the tents were, and from the disturbed brush, he'd gone the wrong way. David could double back the other direction and linger in the forest near the tents, where Gwen wouldn't see him. Derek's search would inevitably end up there, and there was no reliable way to follow him once he'd left the forest. David was a pretty good tracker, if he could say so himself, but he wouldn't find much to follow on hardened dirt trails between decently spaced wooden buildings.
"Hello?"
Crap, he'd been noticed already? Plus it was a kid's voice- and it was Max, of course. Looking uneasily into the woods and belching a few playing cards from around a hand over his mouth.
"David?" Max ventured, and David was gratified to see that at least Max was holding some sort of heavy-looking metal spike - oh, that was a stake from that collapsed tent over there.
Within said collapsed tent, Dolph and Nurf snored in perfect harmony, oblivious.
"Yeah," David confirmed reluctantly, not wanting to edge forward into the light but needing Max to not be wandering around. He kept his voice hushed, as Max lowered the stake to his side, "Someone's on the grounds and you either need to go back to your tent or to Gwen by the counselors' cabin."
"So you're lurking in the dark of the forest watching over us while we sleep," Max said flatly, but his free hand came up to clutch at the other arm. "That's not fucking creepy at all. Would you please step the fuck into the light?"
"Max, remember what I said the other day, about not wanting to do anything that'll give you nightmares?" David hedged, not moving an inch. At Max's reluctant nod, David continued, "Trust me when I say you don't want to see me like this."
"I can handle-"
" I don't want you to see me like this," David emphasized quietly, having almost seen the stubborn start to draw itself over Max like a shroud of Bad Idea. "There was more than one person and-" And of course, when did Max not stumble into danger that forced David to give the boy more traumatic experiences to haunt him forever. David cut himself off as he noted a figure approaching from the other direction.
The rustle off to his right alerted him that Derek had ducked back into the forest. Maybe there was hope that David could still take this fight away from Max. As long as Derek didn't-
And the jerk lunged at Max.
David tackled him from behind, taking him down to the ground before he made it halfway. Which, of course, brought him into Max's full view. He took just a second to mentally curse Derek's impulsivity.
Sure, kids always got up in the middle of the night to stare off into the forest.
It couldn't have possibly been a sign someone was there.
Even David wasn't that oblivious.
Granted, David hadn't been mind-whammied or whatever had happened to these unfortunates.
"Sorry, Max," David said on instinct, cringing at the thought of exactly how drenched he was, and he pressed his knife against Derek's throat, stilling his struggles momentarily, before looking up. He didn't want to see Max's expression, but with his next words, he'd have to see that Max actually did it, "Close your eyes, kiddo."
The kid hesitated, eyes flicking down to David's reddened knife and up again, a little rounder than they usually were - wide with fear, a part of him corrected grimly. For a brief moment after that, Max didn't seem quite able to take his eyes from David's splattered face. His gaze tracked downward, as if tracing the path of blood. Abruptly, Max put a hand out, eyes still wide but now focused on Derek, "David!"
Jerking his own gaze down at the last second, David rolled off Derek, turning the would-be stab from the officer into a slice across his thigh. Looked like Derek carried a knife, too. Peachy keen.
David ignored the part of him that meant it.
He eyed the other man's feet warily, knowing the motion would start there and in his hips when he inevitably lunged. At least the officer being back on his feet meant David could draw him away and-
There was a solid sound of collision, that rang out with the thwack of metal against flesh, and Derek folded over around the hit. Max wildly drew the stake back from the man's stomach, swinging it again into his now-within-reach head like a baseball bat. Derek dropped, unconscious, and both Max and David stared at him for a moment before Max dropped the stake like it had stung him, burped a dove, and turned frightened eyes on David.
"I didn't- You were..." He looked down at his hands, held before him, and shoved them back into his pockets, attention locked on Derek's sprawled form, "Are there any more?"
David correctly parsed that to mean any more still alive. "No, Max. You can... You can go back to sleep." He wanted to comfort him somehow, but he normally did that sort of thing with touch and...
Well, David felt that it would be the wrong move while he was covered in blood. Especially since he didn't want Max to have to deal with washing any of it off of himself.
"It's going to be alright." He tried to tell him that firmly, but it came out more hesitant than anything. Still, something in his tone managed to break Max's focus, and the kid looked up at him unreadably. Though David was coated in blood, none of the usual glee and... well, pleasure of it was there. Not with Max being the one, for once, to stand there looking horribly confused. He just wanted to wrap the kid up in a big hug but, again, the whole drenched in blood thing. The other bodies needed moving, too...
Plus, Derek was still alive.
David couldn't help but itch to fix that.
Max belched a small cloud of glitter and paled, "I'm just going to go sit in the shower until I feel clean again." He looked from David, to the knife still dangling in his hand, to Derek, and visibly washed his hands of the situation, making a sharp about-face and heading towards the bathroom. That was... worrying, but David would have to address it later.
Derek was a tad more pressing of an issue.
It was easier transporting an unconscious person than one that was fighting back, that was for sure. Heavy, but much less painful. He made quick work of the man's limbs, trussing the officer like a pig, hands to feet, and settling in to wait. Finally, Derek roused, and David gave him a big, close-up smile from where he lay on his stomach before his captive, feet kicking in the air behind him.
"Just you and me, now, Derek," David told him with ill-hidden glee. "And I've got a few little questions I've been waiting for someone as lucid as you to answer!"
Derek didn't seem happy to be of assistance.
When David strolled back into camp, loose-limbed, changed, and soaked with lake water, the sun was beginning to peek over the horizon and Gwen was pacing in front of the counselors' cabin.
He hadn't forgotten, exactly, but it had sort of slipped his mind that Gwen had been waiting on him. And had been worried about him. Dang it.
Well, David hoped Max would be willing to take one for the team.
"David!" she exclaimed on seeing him, "Where have you been? What happened? I was trying to decide whether or not to call the police!"
"I tripped one of Max's doohickeys on the way back," David shook out his wet hair, "Taking it all down took a while, but it had to be done. Sorry, Gwen, it just plumb slipped my mind you were waiting on me."
"Okay," Gwen said automatically, nodding before the nod became a negative shake of her head as she thought about it. "No, but I found a bowl over here. How-"
"Dropped it, rolled," David shrugged with an apologetic expression, "I'm sorry I didn't bring your soup, Gwen, but once I got that trap down I was just so darn miffed, I had to go cool off or I might have woken Max up in the middle of the night just to give him a talking to!"
"You were pissed," Gwen pointed at him with an air of disbelief, "at Max."
"I know," David put a hand over his heart. "It was horrible. I can't believe I could sink to such depths as to be upset over a light-hearted prank. That's why I took myself down to the lake straight away! Nothing like a bracing swim to lift your spirits!"
"For hours," Gwen added, and David nodded.
"I might have gotten carried away." Wasn't that the truth. Once he'd had some time to ruminate on it away from Max, he'd gotten a little past miffed that Derek had caused not one, not three, but two different traumatizing events for little Max tonight. Derek had died very slowly. And David had gotten just a little more information!
"You're kind of... drawling," Gwen said, like a revelation spoken aloud more than as a fact she was trying to convey. "And you haven't bounced around once. It's like you got laid, or something."
"More 'or something,'" David said, eyebrows drawing together in disapproval. "I just got some exercise. Gwen, I wouldn't abandon the camp for a date in the middle of the night."
"That is the appropriate time for booty calls," Gwen pursed her lips, narrowed her eyes and circled David. "Do you have a secret girlfriend?"
"Not unless you count Camp Campbell," David joked, perking up slightly since it seemed she was at least off track enough that she didn't suspect him of pulling off nefarious plots in the dark of night, "This camp is the real love of my life, Gwen."
"Boyfriend or significant other?" she pressed, stubbornly ignoring the opening for a potential mocking tease.
"Neither," David put a hand on her shoulder and pushed back gently. "But if I did, you can bet they'd want my friends to respect my personal boundaries."
Gwen didn't take the hint, staring at him from close quarters suspiciously.
"Yeah, you definitely got laid last night," she decided, backing off and crossing her arms over her chest with a smirk. "I'm not even mad. I'm too impressed you somehow scored in this podunk town to even care." She could barely believe it, actually. It wasn't like him at all to abandon everything for some sordid text or call, but that's what the signs were all pointing to. It was... really pushing the limits of her suspension of disbelief, actually, but he hadn't ever been relaxed like that from a swim before.
David felt somewhat violated and just a little worried that his post-killing haze seemed so close to a... post... ahem, that haze to Gwen. And something like squirming worms wriggled in his gut. Leaving trails of guilt, the gross, coiling feeling of self-loathing settled in after its long vacation.
Did David... No, he'd know if he felt... But the slick feeling of blood was kind of... No, nope, David did not have any sort of sexual feelings about killing.
Maybe... Maybe just the... blood? Oh, gingerbread houses and cookies, he didn't want to think about it. No, it was a non-issue. From now until forever. He would never think about it again. Why was he thinking about it? Dammit, Gwen. David was practically asexual in his thoughts until someone brought it up. That's why it always took him so long to cotton on to insinuations of that sort! Now he was just worrying for no reason about something that was unconnected. Besides, the feeling of blood released tension- oh, good golly gosh, no, stop. (1)
His cheeks heated when Gwen fixed him with a knowing look and he realized he'd been silent far too long, "I didn't do anything like that last night, Gwen! I swear!"
"Okay," she shrugged, but was still smirking so David didn't believe her. "Whatever you say, David."
"Okay," David echoed firmly, just on the verge of glaring at her but not quite able to pull it off. Still, he was miffed. "Did you get enough sleep last night?"
Gwen burst into laughter at the sullen tone of the question and the not-quite-glare on David's face, leaving her co-counselor to huff and force a tight smile that had her breaking down in hysterics. The mirth finally melted David's lingering irritation and his smile softened. He reached out a hand to her when she looked about ready to overbalance from how far forward she was bending in her laughter, but she waved him off.
"Go... get a few hours of... sleep," she giggled with an incredulous air in between gasping for breath as the laughter trailed off. "Since I doubt you did much sleeping-!" The sentence cut off with a squeak as Gwen dissolved into laughter again, tears actually forming in her eyes.
David could see Gwen wouldn't stop laughing until he was out of range, so he put his hands up in surrender and made his way back to the cabin. He hadn't done much sleeping, actually, so he wasn't exactly put out by the chance to kip for a while longer. Joke was on her.
.
Max was a little concerned when David wasn't there that morning.
Well, Neil was freaking him out a little, too, with the whole waking up to a whiteboard filled with ominously messy math (messier than usual) and a twitchy, sleep-deprived wreck, but that was almost normal Neil. He must have woken up when Max slipped back into the tent and just exploded into mad science until morning.
Then, of course, he kept pressing Max about the fucking trick Harrison had pulled on him, and Max didn't want to talk about it. The impossibility of it, the sick way it made him feel, was one thing. Remembering that the only person to make him feel a little better about it was also the only person he'd ever seen dripping with blood from head to toe, and simultaneously the person who'd killed the guy Max had knocked out last night... Did that make Max, like, a murderer by proxy? What was the word... An accomplice? He just hadn't wanted David to get- to get... ugh, okay, fine, Max was man enough to be honest with himself. He hadn't wanted David to get hurt, even though David could clearly hold his own from the fucking gallons of blood on him. Had Max mentioned that, yet? The veil of blood practically coating his happy-go-lucky camp counselor?
Just another nightmare on top of the pile this godforsaken hell hole had gifted him.
Not that Max got nightmares.
He wasn't a little kid.
Well, whatever, the point, which was aptly demonstrated by that rambling derailing of his train of thought, was Max didn't want to talk or think about the goddamn Harrison thing.
"So, fuck off, Neil," Max said aloud, and was completely ignored as Neil just kept twitching and tried to lure Nikki to the dark side or something. Whatever.
Gwen was watching them all with a disinterested eye, but smirking to herself and giggling every so often. Abnormal behavior he could focus on without thinking about Harrison or David. Excellent.
"What's so funny, Gwen?" he asked mock-lightly. "Realized your choices in life have made you a joke?"
"Ha, freakin', ha," Gwen rolled her eyes at him, but the smirk kept coming back like a weed too stubborn to die. "I just know why David isn't here, that's all. He didn't get enough sleep last night, you know what I mean?" She glanced down at his blank face and lost all vestiges of humor, pinching her nose and muttering to herself, "Jesus, Gwen, he's ten years old. You need a freaking vacation where you can talk to adults again." Waving it off, she continued at a normal volume, "David just... did something last night that I didn't think he even could do and now he's sleeping it off." Yeah, like taking on multiple attackers in one- wait. That fit a little too well.
"What?" Max hiccupped a bit of glitter, and he'd expected to feel shock that David had told someone else, yeah, but his voice was coming out angry and he couldn't seem to stop it, "What did David tell you?"
Max hadn't thought David would confide in someone else, and part of him had even expected David to consult him about it, if he did. He wasn't... hurt or anything, because that would be ridiculous. He just thought David was being his usual oblivious self and had said too much! He was running damage control! Yeah, that was it.
"What did David tell you?" Gwen echoed, brows furrowed in concern, "He didn't even actually tell me, and he's spilling to a ten year old?" Her eyes narrowed, "Max, what do you think I'm talking about?"
"What do you mean?" Oh shit, she sounded all kinds of strange, now. Drawing back a little, Max could recognize he'd acted rashly, "You're the one he told some secret to. Or you figured it out, or whatever." He tried to put his thoughts in order and come up with a way to minimize the damage, shooting back with, "I'm just pissed he decided to spill some blackmail material after I played my cards with Nurf's boot camp."
"Yeah, I'm not that gullible," Gwen crossed her arms over her chest and Max almost swore because no, she wasn't. "Something's wrong, here." She looked at Max for a long moment, and Max forced himself to roll his eyes.
"Whatever," he said. "Don't tell me." But before he could walk away, she'd snagged him by the hood.
"Not so fast, devilspawn," she reeled him in, turned him around. "You and I are going to talk." Gwen stared into his eyes like she'd be able to read something there - Good luck, he snorted internally - and started, "So, Max, David told me he woke you up last night to lecture you when he got caught in a trap. Is that true?"
Crap. Max had no way of knowing what the right answer here was, and evading the answer would be incredibly suspicious... But better incredibly suspicious than an obvious lie, "What the hell? Why would you even care?"
"So you did see David last night?" Gwen pressed, and Max belched a few balloons in her face, making her flinch back, dropping the grip on his arm.
"You're fucking weird," he told her in another non-answer, then ran for it like the flames of hell were on his heels straight to the counselors' cabin. He burst in without warning and made a beeline for David's room, which he entered with the same lack of ceremony. Slamming the door behind him and ignoring how David was hastily pulling a shirt down over his head, Max hopped up to stand on David's bed so as to get eye level with the concerned man, "David, what the fuck did you tell Gwen happened last night because if she doesn't know about the whole death thing, she's suspicious as hell now."
"What?" David blinked at him, taken aback, "I told her I got caught in one of your Rube Goldberg machines, took it down, and went for a long swim in the lake to calm down."
"Uh huh, and she thinks, what, that you can never get mad?" Max persisted, "Because she thought you did something impossible for you last night, and I thought she meant taking on more than one weirdo at once, and I may have... reacted, but it's really your fault for telling her something you didn't tell me!"
"Max, I didn't tell her- oh, sugar snaps," David put a hand over his face with a quiet groan. "Now I remember what she thought happened, and you reacting is really... Not good."
"What did she think-"
"You know what, Max, it might be better if I handle this one," David gave him a weak smile, then registered where Max was with the door shut behind him and winced. In this context, that's even more suspicious. "And maybe just knock on the door if you need me, instead of coming into my bedroom, okay?"
"What?" Max looked at the door as David mentioned it, then turned back to David with a puzzled scowl that melted into raised brows, "Oh. Oh. David, you just give off the air of a child molester; I don't know what to tell you. But what happened this morning to make her think...? Hmm."
"Please stop and let me think about how to fix this."
"No, but seriously," Max was grinning now. "If I were still trying to get you fired, or arrested, or something, it would be so easy. I'd just be all, 'Officer, he touched me in my no-no place.'"
"Jesus, Max," David snarled. The anger took them both aback, but David still looked uncharacteristically surly, despite the surprise.
"Damn," Max had his hands up placatingly. "It was just a joke, David. I only - I only made it 'cause I know it would never happen, okay? You're way more likely to just strangle me to death." At the actual glare, Max winced, belched a top hat, and continued, "Sorry, habit. Plus, you know, last night." The glare faded into something more vulnerable, like a hesitant puppy dog, now, and Max returned it blankly for a moment before he broke with a groan, "You're scary as shit and that's really fucking clear after last night. You've got some serious issues, David, but I don't think you're going to kill me. I still believe that you..." A gag that led to a deck of cards, "care about me. Happy?"
David's lips twitched at the edges and Max rolled his eyes with another glittery hiccup.
"Okay, don't fucking marinate in it; I didn't say I care about you or anything," he reached behind him and opened the door. "You should probably go talk to Gwen before-" David had squeezed his eyes shut and his lips split in a grimace, so Max looked behind him to see what he'd noticed, "Oh, hey, Gwen."
"Hi, Max, David," she said flatly, looking from him to David and back again with a piercing stare, "Whatcha doing?"
"Well, if you examine David's posture, you'll see I was battering him down into despair with words alone," Max replied, with a sinister glee David almost believed. David, having just prior to Max's response collapsed into his desk chair and slumped over said desk with his head facedown on its surface, raised a hand wearily.
"What he said," David agreed as Max ducked out of the conversation for a moment to vomit something new, hands going to his stomach queasily when the magic wand was rolling away.
"What should David talk to me about?" Gwen pressed, almost sweetly. "Is there a secret I should be in on?"
"I ask myself that everyday," Max tried to pull off an exasperated sigh, but it sounded more like he was taking a deep breath to keep from vomiting again. "But he has no weaknesses. It's the worst. When you said he was sleeping something off, I was kind of hoping he'd be hungover enough that loud noises would drive him over the edge, but no, not David ."
"Did you want something, Gwen?" David put in as politely as he could without raising his head from his desk.
"Well, now that you mention it, your shirt is on backwards," Gwen pointed out with an edge of venom to her words.
"That's what happens when you get visitors while you're trying to get dressed," David said with false cheer, into the wood of his desk, "You don't pay as much attention to what you're putting on."
She glared at the two of them, back and forth, "David, I don't want to call social services on you, but this is really fucking suspicious. What the hell is going on?"
"Can you just take my word for it that it's one hundred percent not what you think?" David mumbled into the desk sadly, and Gwen strode over, grabbed the back of his head by the hair, and pulled him up into a sitting position.
"Max, shut the door and sit down," she demanded, sitting herself on the desk and releasing David. When Max obeyed, looking a little wide-eyed as he hopped up onto the bed, she crossed her arms over her chest and took a deep breath, "Max, I want you to know, I'm not mad at you. I'm just a little scared for you, and I don't want to believe it could be true, but you're both acting fucking weird-" Max was still just staring at her, and Gwen sighed, repeating, "This is so super suspicious. It would be irresponsible not to look into it, at least."
David didn't want to speak up, but he was a little worried about how she was handling the situation as she perceived it, "You know, if you're thinking what I think you're thinking, you're supposed to separate the kid and talk to them alone so they aren't frightened of retaliation."
"Shut up, David, I don't know whether I'm supposed to hate you yet or not," she snapped, then wrinkled her nose and sighed. "But you're right. And you being right just makes this more confusing. Jesus, does Max have some set of instructions he's supposed to follow once left alone, or something?"
Max caught David's eye and the thought passed clearly between them: that actually would have been a good idea.
"Don't do that," Gwen stood and placed herself next to Max. "No creepy shared glances, understood?"
"Whatever," Max rolled his eyes, feeling up to sass now that he hadn't vomited for a near full half minute. "You've clearly lost the plot."
"Max, you don't have to lie for him." Gwen's voice softened, "You can tell me the truth." Uh, yes, he did have to lie. Max didn't exactly want to David to go to jail. Though it wasn't for the reason Gwen was thinking about.
"I'm still in the room," David reminded her. "Though it's a moot point because I have never inappropriately touched a child, to be blunt."
"How am I supposed to believe you?" she argued, "You came back in this morning looking like..." She choked on the words, looking green about the gills, and fought on, "And somehow Max knew about it? Was covering something up for you? He was mad that I knew, David. Mad that you might have told me about... it. Explain that."
Max had no clue where to go with that so he leaned towards David for clarification of a key point, "Looking like what?"
"When you're older," David said with a wince, and Max's brows raised. He gestured at Gwen, then at David, then around the room to encompass the situation. Max wasn't entirely wrong with his wordless gesture. And it wasn't like he hadn't already seen nearly all the worst of David, so why the loving heck not? David gave him a tight smile as the last of his dignity withered inside him, "Well, then you can piece it together, can't you?"
"...Oh, damn, yeah that's super creepy, David," Max replied, looking a little queasier, "You didn't... like... do anything...?"
"No, of course not, Jesus," David snapped back, at the end of his patience with the number of false accusations leveled at him today and Max sighed in relief.
"Had to ask," he muttered unapologetically, before burping up a pair of joined metal rings in a painful spasm.
"That," Gwen pointed between them, mouth contorted in a confused scowl. "That exchange is the sort of thing that made me lock you two in this room so explain or I am calling the cops."
Okay, this was getting ridiculous and Max was getting a little annoyed.
Couldn't she see all Max wanted to do right now was to stop vomiting impossible things and the only person to make him feel better about it couldn't do that if he was busy defending himself against ridiculous accusations?
He hopped to his feet, standing between David and Gwen, "Okay, Gwen do you really think that," a wave the redhead's direction, "could get me to do anything gross? The guy who cries when someone stabs him because he must have hurt their feelings?" The reminder did make Gwen look a little uncomfortable, so Max pressed on, "David is like, the flattest doormat of a person that ever existed when it comes to kids. He would never so much as look at me funny without fucking feeling guilty about it. Even if he was secretly a perv," David looked upward, as if praying for intervention, "he'd never be able to act on it without drowning himself in tears and then throwing himself in the lake to die. You know this gullible jerk, better than I do. Can you honestly say that David would fucking molest me?"
"There's no need to be crude," David started, but fell silent when Max gestured violently his direction at the words.
"See?" he demanded, looking progressively more queasy but refusing to let anything out just yet. He had to win this damn argument.
"Look, Max, if it were anyone but David, I'd have already called the cops, CPS, and your parents; something is wrong and, okay, maybe it's not that - I could barely believe David could be seduced by some ridiculously blatant adult - but you two are lying to me about something," Gwen's arms were crossed firmly over her chest. "What is it?"
"None of your business," Max shot back, putting his hands in his pockets with finality. "If it's not illegal and it's not hurting me or whatever, you don't need to know." To seal the deal, he added, as bitterly as he could, "It's not like you've tried to talk to me about shit."
She scowled at him and shifted uncomfortably, "I mean, you're not wrong."
Honestly, David was impressed Max had somehow talked her out of her previous belief, but that was kind of awe-inspiring. She must not have fully believed it in the first place, only acted on her suspicions out of a sense of duty. The worry of what if. Otherwise, he was at a loss to explain how Max had manipulated that conversation.
"WHERE ARE THE FUCKING COUNSELORS?" someone shouted, making them all jump and Gwen exchanged an automatic look of guilty panic with David.
"Nikki, you're alive?!" Someone else shouted a moment later, while Max simultaneously expelled a series of streamers and balloons from his stomach, wiping his mouth with a crumpled expression that bespoke absolute misery.
David looked from Max to the window, then met Gwen's eyes.
She had something of a constipated expression on her face before she groaned aloud, "Okay. Okay! I can't fucking believe this- I'll let you deal with Max and his 'disease' and your weird little secret bonding or whatever while I deal with whatever just happened outside, but if I smell even a whiff of inappropriate shit between you two, your ass is grass, comprende?"
"Yep, whatever; let me die in peace," Max turned and face-planted onto David's bed, making both counselors wince.
"I'll go get a bowl... Or a bag, for the props." David was about to pat Max's back comfortingly, but under Gwen's weirded out expression, thought better of it and decided discretion was the better part of valor, "I'll be right back, Max."
"Ugh," Max said in reply, retching as another series of colorful scarves slid down to the floor, "It's like it was fucking building up while I was holding it back."
"Language," David called back from the other room as Gwen finally made herself leave, shaking her head like a dog expelling water.
"I can't believe I came in determined to..." Her muttering trailed off into incoherency, then made a brief recurrence, "And now I'm just leaving them alone..."
"David, it feels like a glitter one."
"Wait, I've just found a bag!"
"I'll snort it out my nose if I try to hold it back!"
"I'm here, I'm here! Aim for the bag!"
"Jesus," she said to herself, shutting the door behind her. There was a lot she'd had to repress in her time at Camp Campbell - she'd refused to even ask why Max was vomiting magic bullshit - but this could be the weirdest.
She barely made it five steps towards the kids before she noticed Nikki and Harrison were bowing onstage, with Neil in a defeated slump on the ground beside them.
"Fuck you, Harrison," Neil said flatly, and Gwen groaned. She hated Harrison problems. Looked like the day would only get worse.
...
(Photo sourced from UnSplash https://unsplash.com/@michalmatlon)