Blake Holly
I stared at the enclosed envelope, gripping it tight between each hand.
Kinderton Academy.
Why was I so nervous? I didn't even want to apply to this school, but now all of a sudden, I feel like it's life or death when I open this. I took a deep breath. Fuck it. My hands trembled as I took my fingernail to slice open the sticky part. I carefully pulled the folded-up piece of paper out.
Congratulations! Dear Blake Holly, We have carefully reviewed your application, and are honored to offer you a special placement in our Academy. Kinderton is for gifted students such as yourself and we hope you can see yourself here for the 2016-2017 school year. Below you have been granted a $50,000 scholarship to cover your first year here. We hope to see you soon. Welcome future tiger!
I ran my fingers through my dark hair, and a small smile crept on my face. I could finally start over. Even though I wasn't the fondest of this school because of its 'bougie' reputation, it was the only school that would be far enough to get away from my mess of a life but also not too far from my mom. I have to look out for my mom
School starts in two weeks, so that leaves me just enough time to tell everyone...although there isn't many to tell. Just my mom and my best friend Vee. I hoped they wouldn't be too sad as this would give me a chance to finally have some sort of peace my senior year. I deserve peace. I turned to face the door after hearing it open slightly, my mom stood in the doorway with multiple bags in her hand, looking tired as ever. She was always tired. I rushed to her and grabbed some of the bags to relieve the strain on her back.
"Hello my love, how was your day?" She looked up at me with her weary grey eyes and forced a smile on her face. That's one thing I love and hate about my mom, she could be tired and stressed as ever but she always puts a smile on her face and focuses her attention on me. I mean, I love that she wants me to see the good sides of her but I wish she would know I can see the bad sides too. I've seen the bad sides. I want her to know it's okay to hurt, we've been through so much it would be absolutely insane to not hurt.
"The usual mom. You look so tired why don't you go lie down, and I'll make some dinner, yeah?" I wanted so badly to tell her about my acceptance, but preferably when she isn't half asleep. She works day and night shifts at the hospital. She comes home at about 7:00 pm everyday to rest and eat, just to wake up at 3:00 am and go right back to the hospital and repeat all over again. I've told her time and time again that she doesn't need to work so hard and that the insurance money would take care of us. She wouldn't dare touch the insurance money though. She says its filthy and bad luck. I do believe a part of it is that, but another part is that being at the hospital all day gives her a chance to help people how she couldn't help herself. Gives her a chance to stop thinking about how she couldn't help herself. It's her escape in a way.
She nodded and dropped the grocery bags on the floor, she gave me a kiss on the cheek before dragging her feet up the stairs, not long after that I heard her door close. I unpacked the groceries on the table and began to get dinner started.
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A few days later
I pulled up to Vee's house and parked my car in the driveway. I'd been meaning to tell her the news but I was afraid of how she was going to react. We are each other's only friend and even though the school is 3 hours away we won't be seeing each other nearly every day like how we are used to. I know our friendship is going to change, and God, I'm so scared of that. I would literally die if we "drifted apart". I always hear stories about friendships dying out when one moves away or goes to college and I'll basically be doing both. One thing I do know is our friendship is strong and I trust her with my life so I think we'll manage but it's still hard, you know?
I trot to her front door and press her doorbell camera.
"It's me biatch," I said in a joking way sticking out my tongue to the camera.
"Sorry ma'am wrong house, please escort the premises before I call the cops" Vee responded in this horrible and fake manly voice
I let out a laugh and before I could respond, she opened the door all smiley and bright-eyed.
"I missed you so much B ! Have you been avoiding me?" She engulfed me in a hug but pulled back and raised her eyebrow at me.
Yes.
"No, of course not, just been dealing with some stuff"
Yea stuff.
She rolled her eyes and walked to her living room, I followed her closing the door behind me. Honestly, I didn't want to beat around the bush and make small talk. I can't avoid this any longer, and it was time to tell Vee I'll be moving away in less than a week.
"Vee.." I said, obviously there was a change in my voice causing vee to look at me concerned. I bit down on my lip and tilted my head towards the floor. Here I go being nervous again. Vee tilted her head at me and furrowed her eyebrows together before coming closer to me. She always knows when I'm nervous I couldn't even fake it around her.
"It's okay B, whatever it is you can tell me" She stood with her arms folded. I took a deep breath
"You know that school in Lightbridge Hills? Kinderton?"
"Yeah.." I could tell she already knew where this was going by the change in her body language. now she was the one nervous
"Well, I got accepted...It's a little ways from here but I think it'll be a great chance for me to start over Vee"
She let out a deep breath; I could tell she was thinking long and hard about what to say.
"Shit B, I mean obvi I'm a little bummed but you know I always want the best for you. You deserve a chance to start over. You need to start over. Just don't forget about your homegirl okay?" she chuckled a bit, but I could see tears forming in the wells of her eyes.
"Aww Vee, don't cry. I could never forget about you. Literally ever. We're going to chat everyday of course and I'll make it my mission to come down here and visit you and mom" I pulled her into a tight hug and she sniffled a little into my shoulder. We sat like that for a while before she pulled away and grabbed my hands.
"I love you so much B. You deserve this" she gave me a sincere look and smiled. Even though I could tell Vee was hurt, her joy for me to get a second shot overwhelmed the pain she was feeling. That's what I loved the most about Vee.
"What did your mom say? I know she's a little hurt."
I looked down and twiddled my thumbs "Uhh...I haven't exactly told her yet"
"B what? why? when do you leave?"
"I know, I know... I'm going to, I swear but she's always so tired I don't want to add to her stress and... 5 days"
Vee started to look sad again, and the waterworks began. I knew I should've told her earlier.
"Thats so soon B....we barely have any time together" she pouted
"How about after I tell my mom and spend some time with her, I'll come back over here and stay with you until it's time to go"
"Really B? I would love that" Vee smiled and hugged me again. We talked for hours, mostly about school. Vee called the people there stuck up and bougie and spoon-fed. Then she went on to talk about the hot guys and how she hooked up with one of them at a party in the hills one time.
The night was creeping upon us and I had to be home soon to make my mom dinner also, it was time to reveal the news to her.
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"Mom" I called out, locking the front door behind me "I got food".
I was too tired to cook, so I just picked up food from her favorite Italian place Vaspacios. Maybe with some good food it'll make this information register easier. I saw her small petite body appear from around the staircase. She smiled once she read the writing on the brown paper bags.
Even though my mom had been through hell her beauty remained, she was shorter than me with olive skin, and her jet black hair fell in long wavy tresses on her back. She had stunning grey eyes that showed their true beauty when the sunlight hit them. My mom has lost her self-esteem for a long time now, and being tired all the time masked her beauty but I always saw right past it. Nobody, not even her, could tell me differently.
"Vaspacios.. my favorite. You must really love me?" She said, opening up the bags
"Eh, maybe just a bit" I joked, getting some plates out of the cabinet to set the table.
I set the table and she put the food in the center of the table before we both sat down to dig in.
Shit. How am I going to say this?
Maybe I'll just stuff my face some more.
"Bunny, your so quiet." Bunny. I couldn't help but smile when she called me that. It was my nickname since a child, it had no meaning to it other than that my mom said I was the cutest child ever and Bunnies are the cutest animals to her. Pretty pointless right? But every time I hear it, It heals my inner child in a way.
I sighed and put my fork down, finally looking up at her. I rehearsed this so many times in my head on the car ride home, but all I could do at this moment was pull out the envelope and slide it across the table. This is probably the worst way I could've told her. I don't even know why I did that.
"What's this?" She stopped eating and was a little hesitant to grab the envelope. It's like she looked at me with worried eyes waiting for my confirmation.
"Just read it, mom...please"
She pulled out the letter and her eyes scanned over it. For a while I couldn't tell what she was thinking because her face was just blank. Until she literally started to bawl. And I mean full-on alligator tears and she buried her face in her hands. My heart shattered. This is not how it was supposed to go.
I got up and made my way around the table to hug her shoulders and comfort her.
"Mom, don't cry....I'm sorry I don't have to go, I don't know what I was thinking leaving you here all by yourself. It was just a thought. I won't go."
But it wasn't 'just a thought' ever since I got the letter I was set on going. I kind of started to feel like I could breathe again.
She didn't respond she just kept sobbing and at this point I didn't know what to do. I just rubbed her shoulders and buried my head into her neck. She started to sniffle like she was calming down and I handed her one of the hankerchiefs from the table to wipe her eyes with. I sat down next to her and she grabbed both of my hands before speaking.
"Blake...I love you so much sweetie but what type of mother would I be if I held you back from this opportunity for my own selfish reasons. God, I want to be so selfish right now and beg you to stay. Your all I have Bunny. But you need this, you deserve this. You're so young and you have been through so much shit. So much shit I blame myself for. So no Blake, you won't stay. You need to go. Maybe this can be good for the both of us. Maybe I'll be inspired to finally leave this shithole full of bad memories too. There's nothing here for us anymore." She squeezed my hand and forced a smile.
There she goes forcing that smile again. This time there was something different though. It wasn't all the way forced, there was something truly genuine behind it, I knew she was right and I had to take this opportunity. I'll come back for her, I swear.
I started to tear up, even though deep down we both knew I had to go, it still hurt. It hurt so bad. I never wanted to leave my mom, I felt like I had to be there to take care of her, to make sure it doesn't get bad again. I can't babysit my mom for the rest of my life though and she knows that too. It's time for me to live my own life. Start a new one.
Authors Note
I hope you all enjoyed this prologue! This is very different than what I used to write, I've always written rapper and celebrity FanFics so starting a book with my own characters and storyline is nerve wrecking!!! Please give me all your feedback and opinions as it is greatly appreciated :)
What happened to blake and her mom?
Will Blake fit in at Kinderton?