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Chapter 20
Cattleya’s POV,
It had been a few days since Tyler and I slept together and we hadn’t really spoken much since. Mostly because I avoided him as much as I possibly could. I tried not going to the kitchen at the same time as him, or sitting in the living room watching TV even if it wasn’t just the two of us. Things were just so awkward even though he was trying to make them the least awkward as he could.
Jake also called me to tell me that he couldn’t enter me in the fighting competition because I wasn’t eighteen yet and also because if I wanted to enter, I should have signed up at least two months ago. My entire plan to pay Emilio back by wining the fighting competition was ruined. I had also been trying to call Hannah but I wasn’t able to stay on the phone long enough to wait for her to actually pick up. I didn’t know how to tell her about Tyler and I and I also didn’t want to tell her, but I knew I had to eventually.
I was outside lying on the grass in my bikini, reading a magazine, when Nate came up to me and handed me an envelope.
“What’s this?”
It was one of those formal envelopes like the ones about your taxes or the bank.
“Yea sorry I forgot to give t to you. It came about a week ago and it’s addressed to you. Who do you know in Louisiana?”
I stared at the envelope ignoring Nate’s question for the moment. I turned it around to look at the address on the back to make sure it was from him. It was. I felt a sharp pain in my chest and dropped the letter on the floor.
“Cattleya? Is everything okay? Who’s it from?” he repeated.
“Nobody important. Thanks Nate.”
He looked at me for a few long seconds before he left. I continued flipping through my magazine, refusing to open the letter, however I simply couldn’t stop glancing at it every three seconds. I pic it up and took a deep breath before I ripped the envelope open.
Cattleya,
I know it has been I very long time since we have spoken, and I apologize for that, but I hope you can do me a favor and read this letter before you throw it out. I must have written it at least twenty times before I send it to make sure it was perfect. Anyway, I’m not just writing you out of the blue after seven years for no reason at all. I wanted to wish you a happy birthday even though I doubt you can ever enjoy your birthday after I ruined your life like that. You have grown up so quickly. Seventeen! You’re nearly an adult! I also wrote you because I wanted you to be the first to know that I am getting out of prison in three months. I know you probably aren’t happy to hear that, and I completely understand if you don’t want to see me again, but I just wanted you to know incase you did care. I’m not asking you to forgive me or anything like that, I’m not even asking you to be my daughter again and for us all, including your mother, to be a happy family, but I just want to see you again before it’s too late. I want to make things right. I want to tell you how sorry I am and how stupid I was. And most of all, I want to show you that I really have changed. It’s amazing what prison can do to a man. I hope you will visit or at least write me back, however I understand if you don’t. Either way, I will be waiting for you. I love you very much Cattleya.
Your father.
As soon as I finished the letter I ran inside the house as fast as I could, with the letter gripped inside my hand tightly. I heard Nate shouting my name after me but I ignored him as I couldn’t exactly speak right now. I burst the bathroom door open and threw up in the toilet. The letter was released from my hand as I had dropped it on the ground so I could hold my hair. I coughed once I was done throwing up and I flushed the toiled. I felt terrible. The pain in my chest had deepened and my heart was beating so fast, it was about to plop out of my chest. I felt like crying and screaming but I couldn’t. I had to control myself. I splashed some water on my face and brushed my teeth from the awful taste of vomit. I picked up the letter from beside the toilet, and headed to my room where I closed the door and collapsed onto my bed. I closed my eyes and quickly fell asleep.
Nate’s POV,
I was pressing random button on the remote, trying to find something good on TV, but this summer TV was terrible. The only thing that was on was the news or those stupid reality TV shows about nothing.
I finally got myself to get up from the couch and walk to the kitchen. Those hot summer days really make you lazy. Cattleya came running out of nowhere and ran up the stairs.
“Cattleya!?” I shouted after her but she didn’t seem to acknowledge it. I heard a door shut loudly and I wanted to go after her to see if she was ok, but Tyler entered the kitchen and distracted me.
“She is one weird girl don’t you think? Running upstairs like a maniac for now reason at all.”
“I’m sure she has a reason else she would be running like that don’t you think Tyler?”
He sometimes made the stupidest comments.
“I guess. Whatever.”
I tried to leave to check on Cattleya but Tyler grabbed my arm not allowing me. I gave him a confused look and pulled my arm away.
“What are you doing? I want to see if she’s okay.”
He took the unopened beer from my hand, opened it, I gulped nearly the entire thing down in five seconds.
“She and I slept together.” He said out of nowhere.
I felt nauseous. Like my organs and intestines were tangled and wrapped around each other. A wave of rage washed over me as I continued looking Tyler in the eyes. Thankfully, I could easily hide my emotions and look as if I didn’t care, even though I did. I cared so much. How could she? I thought there was something between us. I thought she feelings for me, but now I find out she was just playing me all along. And Tyler, out of all people, is the guy she choses to betray me with. He began smirking as if he was reliving the moment and I just wanted to beat that smirk right off his face.
“When?” I asked calmly.
He continued smirking and took another sip of what was supposed to be my beer. It’s like he just wants to take everything away from me. In his defense, he doesn’t know what happened between her and I. But still, he’s supposed to be with Hannah. They’re having a baby together! It’s the right thing to do.
“Few days ago at her house. It was amazing! Probably the best-“
“I don’t need to know the details.” I quickly said, cutting him off.
“Understandable. I guess I should go check up on her since, well, you know…”
With that he walked upstairs and left me standing in the kitchen, tasting vomit coming up my throat. I had to swallow several times to make it go away but for the next few days, it never really did.
Cattleya POV,
Should I? No, I could always call another time. Besides I’m really busy. I should probably clean my room, or do the laundry, or read that book I’ve been meaning to read for the past three months. No! Come on don’t be a coward! Just call her now!
Before I changed my mind again, I quickly pressed the button on my phone once I had dialed the number. It took a few seconds until she finally picked up.
“Hannah?” I nearly whispered into the phone. I wasn’t even sure she could hear me.
“What do you want?” she answered so coldly that I nearly froze.
I found my voice again and build up the courage to say what I had been meaning to say for the past week.
“Can we please meet? I know you don’t want to see me or talk to me, but I need to tell you something. I can only tell you in person and I need you to know that I am so sorry. Truth is Hannah, I miss you so much and I want us to be friends again. Words cannot describe how sorry I am. Please Hannah, please?”
There was a long pause but I could hear her breathing.
“Starbucks, one hour.” She said and hung up the phone.
My eyes widened and it took me a short moment to realize that she just agreed to meet me. This was a step forward since this meant she was finally willing to talk to me again. However, it could only go downhill from here since I was about to tell her about Tyler and I. She would never ever forgive me. How was I supposed to tell her anyway? Shit. Why didn’t I think about this earlier? I guess I’ll just have to improvise.
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I slowly sipped my ice tea, not taking my eyes off the window incase Hannah came. Five minutes later, she entered, wearing denim shorts and a loose tank top. Her hair was down and straightened. She looked good. She sat down in front of me and continued making eye contact, which I found very intimidating. As if I wasn’t nervous enough already.
“I ordered you a green tea. You’re favorite.” I said trying to make this the least awkward as possible.
Not a movement. She didn’t even glance at the glass. She just continued staring with no expression on her face.
“What did you want to tell me?” she said harshly.
“Okay, please just hear me out okay?”
I took a deep breath and began.
“First of all I want you to know that I am so sorry. I had no idea how to tell you and I know that there is no excuse for what I did. I am also so sorry for the things that I said to you. I didn’t mean them. I am so sorry Hannah. You’re my best friend. Or at least you were, and I miss you so much.”
I took another deep breath and watched her emotionless face for a second. She carefully took a sip of the tea as if I might have poisoned it. Then I continued. This was the moment. I had to tell her about Tyler and I.
“I didn’t just ask you to meet today because I wanted to tell you how sorry I was. Don’t get me wrong; I did want to tell you that too, but also something else. I’m not quite sure how to tell you though.”
“Just get it over with.” She said all of a sudden with an annoyed look on her face. She clearly didn’t want to be here as much as I didn’t.
“A few days ago I went home, to my home not theirs, and I fell asleep. Next thing I know, Tyler woke me up and said he needed to talk to someone about you wanting to get an abortion.”
Her face was no longer emotionless. He looked hurt and betrayed. As if she knew what I was about to tell her.
“One thing led to another and…”
“You slept together?!” she said a bit loud causing some heads to turn around and stare at us.
“I’m so sorry Hannah! I didn’t mean to but it just kind of happened. I know that’s no excuse. I can’t explain to you how much I wish I could turn back time and just erase all of this.”
She didn’t say anything else. She just stared at me and covered all of her emotions once again to make sure I had no idea what she was thinking.
“Hannah please say something?”
A tear fell down her face and landed on her perfect top. Before I knew it, she burst out crying and covered her eyes with her hands.
“Hannah? Please don’t cry.” I tried but it didn’t work.
“I-I’m not crying because of y-you.” She stuttered once she calmed down a bit.
I grabbed her some tissues and she used them to blow her nose and dry up her tears.
“Then why are you crying?” I asked gently.
She continued sobbing for a few minutes and when she got her voice back and could speak properly, she said,
“Because I’m a horrible, horrible person. I’m a liar and a bad friend.”
A bad friend? Are you kidding me? If there is one person here that’s a bad friend It’s me. I slept with the father of her baby.
“No you’re not!”
“Yes I am! I am because Tyler is not the father of my baby.”
My eyes widened and I seemed to have lost my voice once again. Not the father? That meant that she slept with someone else and didn’t tell me. Well this just got even more complicated…
“What do you mean not the father? You told Tyler and I that he is. And everyone else knows it too. If he’s not the father, then who is?”
“Do you remember that night when we went to that club and we got really drunk from all those shots we took?”
I thought back to a little over a month ago. It wasn’t actually that long ago it just seemed like a really long time. I didn’t remember much from that night, except that Hannah was really upset about having slept with Tyler and so I wanted to cheer her up by going to the club. I remember there were these two guys buying us drinks and chatting with us for what seemed like hours. I was pretty buzzed and Hannah too.
“Yes.” I answered.
“Remember how I went left with that guy? I don’t even remember his name or what he looks like. I just remember his eyes and that he was blonde.”
I couldn’t really remember what happened afterwards, except that I went outside and somehow Nate was there and then Hannah called telling us to pick her up.
“Is he the father?”
She looked disappointed and guilty. I felt so bad for her at that moment. Even though she had been lying to me this entire time, I couldn’t help but feel guilty as well.
“Yes. After I left with him we slept together and after that I don’t quite remember what happened but somehow I ended up in that park. I’m pretty sure that’s where we slept together. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you it’s just that, I don’t even know the guy. And it was just so much easier to have Tyler be the father since he’s actually around and he does care about the baby now. Although I guess it doesn’t really matter anymore now since I’m having an abortion anyway.”
“You’re still going through with that?”
I couldn’t believe what was happening. Tyler is not the father. He must be relieved when Hannah tells him about this.
“Yes, and also I don’t think it is important for Tyler to know about this.
“That you’re getting an abortion? Because he still thinks it’s his baby so you might want to tell him otherwise.”
“No, of course I’m going to tell him about the abortion. Just not about the whole him not being the father thing. It doesn’t matter now anyway.”
“Hannah, he deserves to know. Look, I have to go, but you need to tell him. If you don’t, I will.” I said firmly and left.
I needed to clear my head. I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or distraught.
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