[Mic]
Ugh, this cold is killing me. My sleep has been intermittent all night as I struggle to get comfortable. My head feeling all fuzzy and full of mucus. My nose is like a bloody leaky tap. How can my nose feel full and stuffy, yet not stop pouring at the same time? It seems like it should be one or the other.
This is where my mind deliriously takes me in the early hours of the morning.
Elsie went down with only a little trouble but has thankfully stayed down. I followed her example and headed to bed not long after. Dosed up with the medicine I bought earlier in the day. The medicine the only thing that came from that store because I can't entertain the idea that Amanda recognised me.
As six o'clock rolls around I give up and climb out of bed. The plan toilet then a cup of hot water to help my throat. Like she knows I'm up, Elsie cries out.
"Okay, baby girl, I'm coming." I say, trying to put a little volume in my raspy voice. Clearing my throat to see if that will help me talk.
Picking her up and it's clear by the feel that she needs a nappy change. Laying her down on the changing table, talking to her the whole time.
Wow, that is a load.
Yet I can't smell anything.
One little benefit at less.
Downfall, I really need to wipe my nose so I don't drip everywhere but I'm elbow deep in this nappy. At less Elsie is content now.
"Right Elsie, I really need the loo myself so I'm going to pop you back in your cot. Then we'll both go downstairs. Deal?" I take her gurgling and kicking out as approval. Chuckling at her happy demeaner.
With my bladder taken care of the two of us head downstairs. I place Elsie on her play mat, leaving her to be entertained by the colourful shapes arched over the mat. While I move to the kitchen to get our drinks ready. As Elsie's bottle cool's I take some more medicine.
Hopefully they'll kick in soon because the pain in my head is increasing.
Elsie welcomes her bottle as pick her back up. Cwtching her in as she enjoys her meal. Once she's burped my energy is drained. With her settled back on her mat, I prop myself on the sofa. I'm sitting up so I can breathe, but comfortable. Just got to stay awake now.
It's just turned eight when Nancy comes home. I tried to get up but had to sit back down with a dizzy spell. That's how Nancy found me in the living room.
"Aw, Mic." She says rushing over to me.
"I tried to get up too quickly." I say, trying to down play how shit I feel.
"This is why I came home early. Have you taken anything?"
"I took some tablets just after six. Don't really feel like eating. Elsie has been changed and had a bottle around the same time."
Nancy picks Elsie up, giving her a cwtch, and a kiss in greeting. "You behaved Elsie-bear? Yeah, good, because you're going to help me look after your Aunty Mic." Nancy says, I try to protest but she cuts me off. "Zip-it, you are to do nothing but relax today. Sit there wrapped up and let us wait on you. That is an order from your elder." She says, pulling a funny strict face at the end, causing me to chuckle.
Holding my hands up in submission.
"Good. Now, I know you don't feel like it but I want you to eat something. Toast or biscuits, just something. What about something to drink?"
"I did make myself a cup of hot water but it's gone cold now, and I'll try a bit of toast to please you."
"Coming right up. Come on Elsie-bear, you're never too young to learn how to make toast."
The two of them make their way into the kitchen leaving me to rest my head back against the sofa. My eye's feel tired now I know I can relax.
* * *
I'm not in the mood for school today. I've got more energy today than I did yesterday but still feel drained. Thankfully I had yesterday off work with the cold taking full affect. I just laid there for most of the day. Nancy came home and fussed over me, not letting me lift a finger.
It was nice, other than the being ill part.
I'd done a lot less days in work the past six weeks. I'd decided to leave the corner shop job and just keep the job at Danny's. When Elsie first came into my life, I had a word with my boss there in private. Explaining my new home life situation. He understood, and gave me the option to take time off to spend with Elsie. I had a lot of holiday days that I hadn't used to take so I used them to have the first four weeks off. Deciding to use the rest one day a week for the next few weeks. Meaning I was down to only working one day a week. A slight difference from what I've been used to but welcomed all the same.
With Nancy back I spent the day just dozing on the sofa. With that first piece of toast in me I found I was able to eat more as the day went on. Nancy whipped up a warm lemonade and honey drink to sooth my throat. By the end of the day the headache was gone. With the full pressure of the congestion passing today.
Nancy insisted I stayed home from school Monday, another day spent on the sofa. Now it's Tuesday and I'm feeling well enough to brave the storm. With no social media I don't know what I'm walking into today.
Did Amanda recognise?
If she did, did she tell people that she saw me with a baby that looks a lot like me?
I'm not stupid, I know what it looks like. A female with a baby that has a family resemblance. Of course, peoples first impression is teen mum. I spent the walk into school trying to rack my brains and remember if I'd told Amandas mum that Elsie was my niece of even implied it. Yet I don't think I did.
The first time I went in that pharmacy I was so over-whelmed. I didn't know what was happening with Amelia. Didn't know what I was doing for Elsie. I was a mess.
Then the other day I go in there with a raging headache, intent on getting something for the cold. Not really thinking about anything but getting relief. Both times were low points in my mental capacity, not really an opportunity to clear my name.
Of course, this worry may be for nothing.
Maybe Amanda didn't recognise me. I have been pretty invisible in school in recent years, maybe that has helped me here.
Or not if the amount of people who just did double takes as I walked past into the school building was anything to go by.
This is going to be a long day.
* * *
"Mikayla," Mr Warde calls me over as I enter reg. "The head teacher wants to talk to you before your lessons. I'll mark you in if you want to head over there now." he says quietly.
With a nod, and a sinking feeling in my gut I turn around and head back out the class.
Taking a deep breath, I knock on the door to the head teacher's office. I haven't been here since I found out about my parents and hoped I'd never have to see this room again. The desk for the secretary remains empty outside her office so I assume I'm to just knock.
A moment later and Mrs Ellis opens the door with a gentle smile.
"Miss Hayes, come in. Take a seat." She says moving back to her desk. Once seated she seems to pause, taking a breath before starting again. "Do you know why I've asked to see you today?"
"No Miss. I was off with a cold yesterday." I mean I have a feeling what this is going to be about but why I'm being called to the head teachers office is beyond me.
"Well yesterday it became known through the school that you had a baby over the summer. Miss Hayes it's my duty to protect you and while I can't do anything now about when you were carrying, I just ..."
"She's my niece." I blurt out. Cutting Mrs Ellis off.
She takes a moment to register what I said. "You're niece?"
"Yes." I nod.
"You're niece. Not your child." She chuckles, sitting back a lot happier and relaxed now. "I've got to say Miss Hayes that makes me feel a lot better."
I try for a tentative smile. "The whole school thinks she's mine?" I ask, not as happy as Mrs Ellis is.
"Yes, I'm afraid, I'm not sure where the mix-up came from."
"I took Elsie to the pharmacy to get some medicine for myself on Saturday, a girl from my year was there. She must have just assumed." Like you did Miss. I want to add but hold my tongue.
The teachers probably think due to my tragic welcome to the orphan club that I would be prime for making the choices that would land me with a baby. They don't realise how much I've had to grow up the past few years or the fact that my like for females means I won't be having any happy accidents. I understand it but it still stinges that there was no query, just straight to the assumption.
"Elsie's a lovely name."
"It was my mum's middle name."
"Ah." Mrs Ellis smiles in understanding. "It's different having a baby in the house. Less full night's sleep, that's for sure."
"She does like waking me up for six in the morning." I chuckle.
Mrs Ellis chuckles as well. "Right, well, everything I was going to say was pointless. I'll send a message out to the teachers so they can try and squash these rumours. In the meantime, you are free to go about you day. Your teachers have said you're doing well again this year so keep up the hard work."
"Thank you, Miss." I say leaving the office. The teachers know but that doesn't account for the students. With a deep breath in what could be the last time I have a quiet moment in school I make my way to first lesson.