With one final glance over my shoulder at the now fallen Kingdom, I stalk out of the gates between Daryl and Lydia. James steps in front of me while Ezekiel and Carol walk behind us, closing the gates for the last time. I bow my head at the forlorn sound of the click of the gates, remembering the last six years I spent inside the walls. This place became my saving grace in my darkest moments. If it wasn't for this community and its leader, I probably would've been dead all those years ago. I spent the last hour grave side, offering my final goodbyes to my sister and father with my husband at my side, lending his strength and love before The King made the announcement that it was time to hit the road. The air is thick with tension and sadness.
I wrap my arms about myself, knowing this will be the last time I am able visit the man that helped bring me into this world. I understand I was lucky enough to get my goodbye with the old man, but I still feel like could've said a million more things. I reach up, wiping a stray tear falling from behind my eyes.
"You know, he told me to fight to get out. I couldn't even fulfill his last request because I was too damn scared." I offer, hearing the familiar footfalls of my husband. "I stayed there entirely too long."
"Nah, he would've understood. But I wouldn't have went down, neither would've our babies," Daryl's hands find my back, rubbing calming circles. "Ya know that better than anyone. That man was a bitch." He grounds out, words filled with old anger towards my devil.
"James would've been next. I couldn't do that to him." I shake my head, old doubt stirring inside of my soul. "Even if I could get out of the closet, I was unarmed, and outnumbered."
"That ain't stopped ya before, Blue." I shrug, unable to argue with his point. However, I wasn't drugged at any of those points. That alone could've been the killing blow from Owen or any of his men. I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction. At the end of the day, I can run through all the 'what if's' and worst case scenarios. I still won, and he's worm chow. I feel Daryl shift beside me. I glance up, curiously. I follow his gaze, realizing he's sharing a staring contest my own grave. His jaw clicks at the sight before him."I was angry at the world for takin' ya and Rick away from me. I wasn't the same. I couldn't bring myself to visit ya grave. It would make my biggest fear real. I know what I said to Charlee and Jesus, but deep down, I was hopin' I was wrong. I was hopin' ya would return to me." He pauses, eyes darkening at the memory of his feelings. "Ya came home, though. If I wasn't so stupid, ya woulda came home sooner."
"No I wouldn't have, Daryl," I offer honestly. "I became everything he accused me of. I wanted my revenge and then some. I left to protect everyone. I would've hurt you. I didn't even stay here. I was outside the gates in Carol's old home." I smirk under the mask, "I even drove Charlee insane with all my suicide missions. I know they were all waiting for the enviable - me picking a fight with the wrong person and not coming home. You would've hated me."
"Nah, I could never hate ya, Vanessa." I bow my head at the simple statement, feeling my heart swell with several mixed emotions - shame of my recent past and love for the man who has been at my side at the end of the world. I didn't realize how much I needed to hear those words from the redneck.
After Jerry passed along the upsetting news, I sent off Wren to Alexandria with Kellin, Caroline, and Jamie in tow, promising I would meet her in a week tops. At the end of this adventure, I'm returning to the place I once called home long before I got kidnapped. I haven't stepped foot inside the gates of Alexandria in so long, I'm growing anxious at the thought of going home. It's going to feel foreign stepping out onto the porch for a morning cigarette, and not seeing Rick's friendly face greeting me from across the road. Though, Daryl's on board with the idea, thinking it would be good for our little family. Hilltop never felt like home. Furthermore, It's where Lydia wanted to go, so we will return with her. My blue eyes zero in on Yumiko. It's time for me to step down, so she can step up. She'd probably do a wildly better job as leader than I have. I'm not built for that kind of title.
I pull my 'little nightmare' leather coat closed, blocking the frigid wind from trying to slice through my soul. Abraham's dog tags clack at the sudden motion. I'm back in my bikers outfit, and combat boots, while the mask sits comfortably against my nose. I traded in my fingerless gloves for leather mitts. A black knitted infinity scarf hangs around my neck, attempting to keep my only exposed flesh warm. My dual swords sit across my back, and my pistols in their holder, lying snug against my thighs.
After a few miles, the echos of the low growling of walkers in the distance drags my awareness in their direction. My fingers twitch, wondering if Alpha or her minions are among the small group of the dead, watching us. I glance around, deciding it's not the best idea to run in there guns blazing, or swords slicing for that matter. I don't want to bring any attention or danger to our little caravan.
Alden sneers, eyes darkening. "Is that them?" He shouts to Lydia. I wrap my arm around her shoulder protectively, dragging her close. "People watchin' us now, huh? Well, we followed their rules. Haven't they done enough to us?"
Lydia bows her head before resting it against my frame, body radiating tension and shame. I send a warning glare in the direction of the former savior. He swallows hard under my intense scowl, averting his gaze.
"Hey!" Daryl barks, "why don't ya lay off?"
"You don't have to protect me. I know how they feel about me." Lydia sighs. I frown, wanting to take her pain away. Over the last six months, we grew incredibly close. She began to spend more and more nights with the twins, my husband and I, eventually crashing with my children in their room permanently. It seems like we might've been the only ones who accepted her, and made her feel welcome. None of us seem to mind; the twins adore her. Like Carl, she's become like another adopted child of mine. I know I will never replace her mother, but I can show her how a mother is supposed to be; how she should've been treated.
"No, don't mean they get to talk to ya like that," Daryl empathizes with the younger female.
Lydia sighs, "just, I don't want to cause any more problems."
"It's their problem, not yours." Daryl shrugs.
"It's okay, hon, you got us, and we're cooler anyway, for some old people," I tease, "especially the redneck next to you. You got some bad asses on your side."
She chuckles at my playful statement. I pat her shoulder, untangling myself from her frame. I stalk off ahead of her, pulling Yumiko away from her girlfriend. It's not without a hostile glare from Magna. Yumiko shakes her head, informing her that it's okay. "What's up?" She inquires when she returns her attention to me, curiosity painting her beautiful face.
"When we get these people to Hilltop, I'm heading for Alexandria." Her dark eyes widen in surprise, "I know what Tara wanted, but I think you should take over for me." Michonne peers over her shoulder at my confession, face growing dark. I pointedly ignore my old friend, returning my attention to the woman beside me.
"Are you sure?" She breathes out.
I nod, chewing on my lip in thought, "I need to focus on my little family right now. Lydia needs me more than Hilltop does, and it's what she wants."
"I'll step down when and if you decide to come back, Vanessa." She pauses, glancing ahead of us. "You did better than you realized, given everything you have on your plate. I can't imagine -"
I hold up my hand, "Yumiko, don't, please. Just do what you gotta do. I'll leave a walkie behind if you need me for any reason. I'll drop everything to come to your aid. I owe you as much for helping me the way you did. I wouldn't have been able to do it without you." I smirk, "and don't pick any fights without me. I want to be front and center for that shit."
She grins, "you got it."
With one important conversation out of the way, I return to my husbands side, realizing Carol has decided to join us. From my short lived conversation with the King, they aren't doing well as couple. Losing Henry might've landed the killing blow to their marriage. I've been there, done that, remembering Luna and Jordan.
"Henry wanted her here." Daryl begins when he notices Carol's eyes don't stray too far from Lydia. "When no one else did. She's a good kid."
"Every time I look at her, all I see is him." Carol quietly admits.
"Who do ya see when ya look at me?"
Carol scoffs in surprise, "I see you."
"What do you see when you look at me, Carol?" I challenge, deciding to put my foot in my mouth, "I put a bullet in Sophia's head and showed up when she went missing. If it wasn't for me, they may have been able to find her."
"I never blamed you for any of that." Carol offers. "Sophia was already dead."
"Do you remember what you told me at the prison when I was fighting with Daryl? The three of us have been abused in some way. You and I are cut from the same cloth - you know, spousal abuse - but so are Lydia and Daryl. They both went through parental abuse. Yet, the three of us are as thick as thieves." I gesture between us. "We've saved one another over and over. Lydia is just like us, just younger, and more naive. That's the only difference between us and her. She needs us. She doesn't need any more abuse from the communities. She needs love. She isn't her mother, Carol. She didn't kill Henry, just like I didn't kill Sophia. Just like Daryl didn't kill Glenn. Different situations, same concept. Henry wouldn't want you blaming the girl he died to save." Rick never blamed Siddiq, I allow the unspoken words to hang on the air between us. I shake my head, leaving the duo behind. The old lady's rocker is starting to tip and I don't want to be anywhere near her when she crash lands. Yes, she was there for me, but I know what she's capable of, and I don't want to go down in her chaos.
Much to our dismay, the winter storm is moving in quickly, so we duck into an old familiar place for cover and warmth. I bring up the rear with my brother beside me as we storm the now abandoned building. I lower my sword as I glance at the brokenness and desolation around me. The memories of our past here dance around me in a morbid reminder of what this place was for our communities.
"People actually lived here?" Magna inquires, glancing around with a small sense of disgust painted across her pretty face.
I hear Michonne's amused tone echo off the walls around us, "welcome to the Sanctuary."
That reminds me of our old enemy locked in the basements inside the walls of Alexandria; has anyone mentioned to Negan I'm alive and well? Probably not. From my understanding per Rosita, he was up in arms about my death; blaming the ghost of Rick for not allowing him out to assist in the search party. Though, I don't blame the sheriff, but - playing devil's advocate here - Negan might've been able to locate James and I sooner. He did work closely with Owen for several years. I hate to admit it, but Negan knows him almost as well as I do. We both knew Owen was coming for me, and it was only a matter of time.
I should've kept my guard up; I would've sensed Justin dangerously lurking behind me, but I was blind with all the other emotions stirring inside my soul from anger towards the redneck and concern for Charlee, seeing her sprawled unconscious across the grass after watching Aaron get stuck under the giant log of uncut wood; when they were able to lift the log from his body, his arm was bloody and mangled mess. My eyes flick to the man in question, zeroing in on the fact that they had to amputate his forearm. Though I wish I was there to assist Enid, I'm just relieved that he was able to mostly survive the tragic incident. Maybe not fully intact, but he's still with us. Small blessings and the like.
Behind Aaron, I spot Ezekiel glaring daggers towards Carol and Daryl who are talking amongst themselves innocently on the stairs. I rub my face, sighing, stalking towards the King. He glances curiously at my approach, body visibly relaxing. "You're looking better, young Phoenix, given our dire situation." He offers as I lower myself next to him. "Better than I have seen from you in the last few years."
I nod, "It's because, through my stubbornness and anger, I didn't realize how badly I needed to be reunited with the redneck that you're trying to kill with your eyes. Wanna talk about it, Zeke?"
He winces, "That obvious?"
"Yup. Now I'd prefer you cut the bullshit and talk to me. You were there for me, now allow me to be there for you."
He bows his head, stress and anxiety written all over his darker face. "I told you about Carol and I, but -"
"You want to blame Daryl because he's there for her right now." I pause, "but I don't see her trying to murder me while I sit here and talk to you. Daryl isn't trying to kill you for helping me all those years and for keeping the secret of my being alive. I get it, you want someone to blame, but don't blame him. He's a good man. Those two met months before I joined, and we've all been there for one another since there's only us three and Maggie left from that time. If you want someone to target with your anger, save it for Alpha and her little crew of unhygienic feral minions. I can't be the only one who knows there's a war on the horizon. She'll find a reason to attack."
He smirks, reaching over to wrap his arm around my shoulder, dragging me in close. I rest my head against his body, finding a moment of peace in the chaos that's beginning to stir outside of the walls of the broken building. "You've always been wise, Vanessa. I'm lucky to consider you family."
We sit there in silence, while I toy with the idea to excuse myself, needing to have one more very important conversation before I am able to truly rest before we hit the road. But, I quickly notice the woman I need to speak to heading in our direction. She sits beside me, sandwiching me between her and The King, watching me carefully. I fiddle anxiously, kicking my legs over the perch, allowing them to dangle freely, knowing I need to speak my peace, but I have to do this delicately.
"Mich, we need to talk." I begin, in the corner of my eye, I observe as she cocks her head, raising her chin slightly. "Now I've had some time to calm down and think, I'd like to answer your question. I owe you that much." I take a deep breathe, noticing the room has grown silent and still as I begin retelling my my experience with Owen from the second I woke up in the basement until the moment I reunited with everyone because Rosita needed me. I don't leave anything out, but attempt to edit the parts that little ears shouldn't be hearing. "He made the Governor look like a puppy," I offer. I observe Jerry bow his head, remembering the shape he found me in. Zeke stiffens, finally hearing the my tale for the first time. Carol holds her head in her hands. Daryl was the first and only person to know the hardships I've faced. "I might've been angry with everyone, thinking you all left me to die, but I would not have done anything to put my family in danger. Yes, I openly attacked Jerry and Jesus, and held Carol at gun point, but I was battling hallucinations for months at that point. I was scared, confused, and out of my mind with insanity. But, I thought you knew me better than that. Yes, I know my timing was suspicious, but the skin walkers were the reason Rosita asked me to drop everything, including my secret, to run to her and Eugene's aid. I hope you fully understand why I couldn't talk about it before, but I had time to heal and now I'm ready to speak about it."
Ezekiel sighs, "this is my first time hearing it, but you didn't see her the way we did, Michonne. The Vanessa we knew, for all intents and purposes, was dead. She was cold, and disconnected from us, even after she killed Owen. But she still wouldn't have joined that group. She checked in with us a few times a week, for supplies and so I could sleep peacefully knowing she was okay, because she wasn't behind our walls."
I hang my head, fighting back tears, "a part of me is still angry. But I had to protect you all from the monster I became. I made Negan look like child's play." I pick up my head, staring at the darker woman head on, "I'm telling you this because I want to return to Alexandria. Lydia wants me to go with her, and I want to keep my promise to her. I know we didn't leave things on good terms between us. However, I can't apologize for what I said back there, or what I did. I don't give false apologies because that's not who I am."
After a few long beats of silence, "okay," she breathes out, face unreadable.
Without much else to offer to the woman, I straighten up, trying to find some peace and quiet from everyone, knowing they heard every humiliating detail I've spilled. I hate being vulnerable, but I had to be, so Michonne could hopefully understand why I reacted the way I had, and why I took the steps I made. My husband finds me shortly after, wrapping me inside of his arms. I grip his shirt, burying my head inside of his chest, allowing myself to sob and break. The memories still scare and plague me. It's why I try to not to speak of them, but I had to.
Negan POV
The small child with long brunette hair positions herself behind Judith as they observe the weather take a turn for the worst. Curiously, I haven't seen this little girl walk the streets of Alexandria; who is she, and why does she look oddly familiar? A ghost of a woman I could never forget stirs in the back of my mind as the child peers over to the woman with red hair, "do you think mommy and daddy are okay?" Her words innocent, but something wise stirs behind her blue eyes. Judith wraps the child in her arms, sensing the distress from her.
It can't be! It's gotta be a goddamn trick of the eyes - cause that little girl could seriously pass off as Vanessa's tiny human.
The redhead smirks, "you know your mother can handle her own. She's dealt with much worse than a simple storm." I spot some concern behind her big brown eyes as she watches the storm begin to pick up dangerously out the window, "right now, you two are stuck with me. You know, I got you. You're safe."
Wait, did she say her fucking mother? The tiny hair stands at attention along my arm as if a ghost passed through my body. I have to be having one hell of a trip. Who fed me the trippy mushrooms?!
Attempting to remain calm and collected, I cock my head, bewildered, at the little boy beside the woman, he's staring at me with the same untrusting intense expression that almost screams little Dixon. I blink twice, shock and surprise electrifying my veins as I spot some familiar facial structures as that same fierce, dangerous woman I once knew and admired... that can't fucking be. Vanessa's friend took them and ran for the hills because she died. There's no chance in hell they would return.
I narrow my eyes, feeling the sweat begin to trickle from my flesh, as I suddenly remember hearing that Charlee was among the dead that they found on the pikes. Maybe, her other friend had no other choice or option, but to return. But from my understanding, they only targeted the communities. If Charlee was on her own with the children, why would they pick her up off the side of the road; unless she had found her way back to the fold and no one decided to speak about it.
"Your father is just as deadly as your mother, kid. They'll be here before you know it," Rosita reassures the younger child perched beside Judith.
I glance at the dual tomahawks secured beside the boy, and the bow and arrow hanging off the little girls back. "You know, I once knew a couple, one loved her dual blades, and the husband loved his crossbow. You two remind me of someone I lost a long time ago. The woman was deadly with any weapon, but her swords were her weapon of choice." I peer between everyone standing in the room, observing me with a look of amusement and knowing. The little girl peers over her shoulder, narrowing her eyes, quickly reminding me of Vanessa once again. "Wait a god damn minute! Vanessa's alive, isn't she?" The ginger shakes her head, grinning, turning her face away from me. "The dead don't come back like that, she's dead. I heard it. It had all you of blubbering hysterically." I begin to plead, wanting an answer, but no one willing offer any type of information of the woman I mourned with everyone inside these walls. "You gotta be shitting me. Now you all wanna be quiet."
"You talk a lot," the little girl sneers at me. "Can I knock him out? It'll be nice and quiet."
Vanessa POV
With a mostly unanimous vote to cross into the boarders, we abandon the sanctuary, and resume the trek towards Hilltop. Sadness and anxiety seeps into the air, thickening the frigid winds, coiling about and squeezing us like a snake, attempting to steal the life and energy from of us. The pit in my stomach grows deeper knowing it's only a matter of time before this little stunt bites us in the ass. While I understand everyone's reasoning, I truly don't underestimate Alpha. I have no doubt that she has eyes on us at all times. She's smart as hell, clever, and cunning. We haven't truly faced someone like her before. Don't get me wrong, I don't fear her. I just know better than to pretend she's child's play.
"Ya okay, runt?" James creeps up behind, coming to walk in tandem with me. "Ya look like ya ready to punch someone in the face for breathin' in your direction."
"Yeah, just peachy," my face sours when I notice that he's studying me. I bow my head, sighing, "I just have a bad feeling about this."
"Ya ain't the only one," he grumbles. He pauses, peering at the group around us, "I know I ain't told ya, yet, but I respect the hell outta Daryl. Maybe even like him. I was wrong 'bout him. He might be a little rough 'round the edges, but I see how y'all bring out a softer side in one another. He's a good man."
I smirk, stealing a glance in his direction, "is that your fancy way of saying you like the redneck?"
He chuckles, shrugging. Before he could respond, an intense silence falls over the convoy. I look around, noticing what is causing this reaction from my friends and family. Nausea sinks its teeth inside my soul; the bile raising to my throat as I spot the pikes growing in the distance. I freeze, rooted in my spot, blue eyes locking onto the pike that held Charlee's head. I attempt to shake the nightmare out of my soul, remembering it wasn't long ago that she was growling, eyes clouded over in necrosis; the woman that walked side by side with me for most of my life had her life cut short because I threatened Alpha. Next time, I will not offer any type of warning, I'm just going to go in for the kill.
Jesus and Charlee will get their fucking justice,
I'm sitting at the vanity inside my bedroom, straightening my long hair. My make up is already complete; instead of my usual show stopping smokey eyes; I elected to do something elegant and 'normal' with brown eyeshadow, instead, to bring out my blue eyes, and very little black eyeliner. I glance in the mirror spotting Charlee lurking behind me, leaning against the doorway, crossing her arms, watching me curiously. Her long dark hair is curled around her frame; she's dressed in a black dress that fits her body perfectly. She's not one for make up, but today, she has red lips and eyeliner painted flawlessly on her face. A frown etches itself into her lips as she detects my distressed deposition. She could always read me like a damn book, even when my mask is in place and am able to fool everyone else around me.
"How are you doing, Ness?" She inquires, stalking through my bedroom, taking the flatiron from my hands, and begins to work on the back of my head.
I'm a mess. I lost the woman who brought me into this world very suddenly. I'm barely an adult, and now have to attempt to navigate the world without her wisdom. Now I have to pull myself together and sit through my moms funeral; hopefully getting through it one piece. "As well as to be expected," I answer quietly.
We sit there in silence for a few moments, the only sound that can be heard is the click of the straightener until she finishes. I watch her turn it off, and unplug it. "You'll be okay," she finally speaks as she sets it down onto the towel as it cools. "I'm still here; Kelly and Jordan are waiting for us in the living room. Wren is meeting us there. You ready?"
"no, honestly, I want to hide and pretend this is a nightmare." I bow my head, feeling a sob claw at my throat.
She sets her hand on my shoulder, "tell you what, I'll stay with you this weekend when this is over. We'll lock ourselves in here, watch our favorite scary movies, eat all the junk food our hearts can handle. We'll pretend the outside world doesn't exist."
I perk up, "all the twizzlers, ice cream, and pop?"
"I'll clear the shelf of the twizzlers because I know how much you love them." Her other hand finds my cheek, wiping a stray tear from my face with her thumb, her brown eyes not leaving mine, "now stop crying, or your eye liner will run. We're going for normal, not a member of KISS. I'm sure your family wouldn't appreciate it. Though, I highly doubt they'd be shocked." I giggle through the water works. She glances at the clock, sighing, "let's go. I'll tell Kelly we have a stop to make on the way back. Any requests for movies?"
My face sours, "no Grudge. That movie still haunts me."
She grins, "okay, so The Grudge, got it." Charlee mimics Kayako's sound, playfully batting at my arms, "Vanessa!" She copies the earsplitting shriek from the only horror movie ghost that gets under my skin.
"Charlee!" I groan, covering my ears. Seconds later, we burst out laughing, linking arms, stalking out of my room, heading for my fiancé and Kelly. I'm not ready to face the next few hours, but at least, I'll have her at my side.
The physical feeling of someone wrapping me inside their arms drags me back to the present. I shake off the memory, glancing over, seeing Carol; understanding and sadness tighten her beautifully aged face. She uses her free hand, wiping my face clear of the tears just as Charlee did in the memory that just threw me several years into the past. I didn't realize that they were falling from behind my eyes. I allow her to lead me through the pikes while I wrap my arm around her waist, walking together. We stay like that in a comfortable and understanding silence for miles until we come across a body of water that is frozen solid.
I untangle myself from Carol when Ezekiel breaks the silence, "there's the river. We made it," he proclaims.
"I'm gonna check the ice." Daryl speaks, stepping towards the sleet.
Michonne offers, "I'm right behind you."
I observe Daryl and Michonne stalk towards the ice, with me only a few steps behind them. I don't want to be far in case this goes sideways. Things have a tendency of going from wrong to an absolute shitshow in only a matter seconds. I easily pull a blade from its scabbard, holding the hilt tight within my grasp. I raise my gaze, keeping it trained on the too still winter scene around us. We are in enemy territory, and I have a bad feeling growing inside my stomach.
"Yeah, I think we're good." Daryl finally delivers.
"We have to assume they have eyes on the borders." Behind me, Ezekiel turns to Jerry, delivering a request to his right hand man, "make sure the others are ready to go."
"Done and done." Jerry accepts his former leaders small order.
The voices fade into the background as I hear the sounds of walkers growling. Blood pumping to my ears, I spin on my heels, eyes frantically searching, detecting that they are close, but unable to locate where the noise is coming from.
Fuck! "The dead are here," I snarl, finally seeing one sprout from the snow, reaching for the King. I quickly grab my throwing knife, tossing it into the skull in one smooth motion. The thud as the blade meet its target, imbedding itself into the bone and brain matter, is quiet amongst the chorus of groans as more of the dead erupt from the ground.
"Move!" Michonne demands.
I seek out Daryl, he signals for me to help the others. I nod, running onto the lake, trying to quickly direct everyone across while Ezekiel does the same; both of us working diligently to get these people to safety. I grip one sword, using my free hand to wave everyone through.
"Vanessa!" Daryl shouts out a warning. Before I could react, a cold, boney hand wraps around my ankle, yanking at my leg, forcing my body land on the ice. I groan, feeling my head hit something on the way down. I attempt to blink the dizziness away, without much success. I faintly hear my husbands worried shouts fill the air. I'm still aware enough to kick at the corpse gripping my leg, its snarling and snapping maw loud over the distant disarray.
"Come on," I whisper to myself, trying to stay conscious; desperate to stay alive. Suddenly, its moans are cut short as a hand falls into view. I glance up, seeing two figures of the same person standing over me. My eyes grow wide in fear, spotting Owen. I whimper, attempting to roll over, to try and crawl away. I fucking killed him, what the hell?
"Hey, hey, it's okay, it's just me," a woman's voice falls from from the devils lips. I shake my head, attempting to swallow the panic. I close my eyes, taking deep breaths, forcing the images of Owen out of my mind, before returning my focus. "You're safe. Ezekiel, I need help! She hit her head!" Michonne calls out while reaching down. I nod, allowing her to help me stand. I hang my head, the dizziness and darkness still threatening to take me out right here and now. I feel Ezekiel take me into his arms, supporting my weight, helping me across the frozen water.
After getting patched up at Hilltop, and offering my goodbyes to The King, Jerry and Yumiko, I stalk into the gates of Alexandria. The anxiety peeling from my bones as Rosita and Father Gabriel greet me with a smile painting their faces. Caroline and Kellin shout excitedly, running to attack me with hugs. I return their embrace with the same enthusiasm, painting little kisses atop their head. "Mommy! You're okay!" Kellin relaxes.
Caroline spots the bandage around my head, eying it wearily, "what happened? Aunt Wren said you'd be okay."
I chuckle, "I just took a nasty spill, but I'm as good as new." Caroline nods, eyes growing wide. I peer over my shoulder, realizing she spots Daryl. I know this is still new for them, but they seem to be growing content with the idea that they now have their father. They run by me, rushing the redneck. His face wide in surprise, but it's quickly replaced with love he feels for our children. His gaze meets mine, grinning. I match it with one of my own. It's good to have all of us back here at Alex.
Rosita's sudden embrace drags my attention back to the gorgeous woman in front of me, "I'm so happy you came back here."
I giggle, returning the same affection, rubbing her back. "It's good to be back," my lips not far from her ears. I'm so happy that she's become one of my closest friends. She's helped bring me back, and I owe her everything. I don't know where I'd be without her support.
For a moment I'm startled, pulling my body away from Rosita when Michonne pats my shoulder, "welcome home, Vanessa." She grins, stalking off towards the infirmary without waiting for me to respond. My mouth falls open, surprise electrifying my veins. Well, I'm glad we squashed whatever was building between us.
The sounds of children laughing pull my attention towards my husband throwing snowballs with Judith and our twins. "Daddy!" Kellin giggles as the snow hits him in the legs. I laugh, feeling the giddiness and happiness soar into my soul. I cross my arms, feeling my heart swell at the scene playing out in front of us.
"Vanessa, there's something you need to know." Rosita's serious tone drags my awareness back to her. I eye her wearily, unsure if she's going to deliver some news that ends with me needing to end someone. I'm not entirely sure if my body can handle it, but if I have to, and the like. "Judith ran after Dog in the middle of the storm, Caroline chased her. Negan went after them, and was able to bring them back safely. He got injured in the process."
"I - what?" I run a hand along my exhausted face, that wasn't exactly what I was expecting. "I guess it's time to pay him a visit huh?" She shrugs. I offer my goodbyes as I follow Michonne's steps, heading for the man I should've visited a long time ago. I overhear the sounds of Michonne and Negan talking amongst each other. Father Gabriel mentioned that my name hasn't been brought up inside the community since my return. I mean, I've kept a low profile. I haven't been making headlines. Well, for the most part.
I peek around the corner, smiling at Negan. "Boo," I smirk as his eyes find me, growing wide in shock.
"Holy shit! The dead are inside the fucking walls." Negan exclaims. I step inside the doorway, crossing my arms, leaning against the wall. "Vanessa, is that really you?" I nod, sharing a cheeky grin with Michonne. She pats me on the shoulder for the second time today as she takes her leave.
"I decided it was time to come home. I figured I'd drop in and pester you since I heard you saved my daughter and Judith. Thank you," I offer.
"Ah, I had a feeling that little spitfire was Caroline. She decided to threaten me while Kellin gave me the same death stare you had on your pretty little face each time you tried to kill me. She's as pretty as her mama; and just as deadly. For awhile, like her daddy, she was sharpening her arrows, listening to all of the talk around her before the storm got shitty." Yeah, that sounds like my little girl.
"I guess that means I'm doing something right in the parenting department." I shrug.
He clears his throat, eyes searching my face. "So you played dead for several years. It was that bad?" I grow tense at the sudden seriousness of the conversation, nodding. "I tried getting Rick to let me out of the cage and track you down. I would've had your fine ass back here sooner. I think I blamed Rick as much as I blamed myself. I considered your death was my fault as much as Owen's.
My neck snaps at the admission. "I was there for five months. The King, Carol, Jesus and a few others came to my rescue. Arat helped bring them to me. I'm sorry that you felt that way, but it was what I needed. I needed to be alone and work through things. I didn't plan on ever coming back, if I'm being honest."
"The redneck wasn't there to bring his wife back?" I shake my head, frowning. "He doesn't deserve you. Owen dead?" I watch as something clicks in his brain, "wait, you were gone the entire time? No husband for all those years?
"Yup." Ignoring the jab at my husband, "I made you look like kitten. Even if the fire didn't kill him, the other injuries would've done it. I was feeling creatively mean. And to answer your other question, it was just me, and the children, Jamie, Wren, Charlee, and my brother." His eyes grow wide in surprise. "That's the only thing he got right - reuniting me with James."
His sputters, "you lit him on fire while he was breathing? Jesus. He still got off easy."
I shrug, "at least he's dead, and I'm alive."
He nods, "its good to have you back, Reaper."
I smirk, "it's good to be back."