Becoming a murderer is a silly thing. I never thought that I'd become one since I had promised my sister to not do anything that wasn't kind.
Guess I burned that bridge.
I can picture Riv's face now. Seething with anger and a knife in her hand.
My eyes dart around the city of Polis as I picture her reaction to my actions 5 years ago. She'd be horrified and I think scared of me.
I think I'd be scared of me too.
My thoughts are interrupted by Lexa walking into the room, but I don't turn around. I hear her sigh at my lack of acknowledgment, but I still don't turn.
Instead I mutter, "What part of "I won't see you" was unclear?" I finally turn my gaze to meet her's.
She rolls her eyes as she comes to stand next to the window seat I'm sat on. "I respected your wishes for a week, Hails." She says and my eyes narrow. "We've got bigger concerns." Her eyes meet mine and I almost forget about the anger in my veins.
"Don't call me that." I say, turning my gaze back to the window. "Besides, 'We' don't have any concerns at all." I glare at her.
She shakes her head in annoyance before sitting across from me, her lack of armour making her movement almost silent. "Yes, we do." She sighs, glancing at view. "I'm hosting a summit with Skaikru at sundown." She says, turning back to me. "You'll be returned to your people." She says, her voice light, but my nerves spike.
"I'd rather never return." Bellamy's lips on hers come to mind and I squeeze my eyes shut for a moment before sighing.
"And why is that?" She tilts her head, curiosity in her eyes that is in the likeness of a child's.
"Why do you think, Lexa?" I say, narrowing my eyes at her makeup-free face.
"Killing those men, women, and children is a shared blame, Hailey." She glances down. "That blame is also shared onto my shoulders as well as yours."
I bring my eyes to hers, my jaw clicking. "Yeah, well, what a big help you were."
"I know, but it's the choice you would have made." She says and I know that she's right.
"Clarke would have talked me out of it." I mutter, playing with my fingers. "Why go through all this trouble just to let me go?" I say, getting back on topic.
She sighs before saying, "I went to all that trouble to save you."
I narrow my eyes. "Why now when we needed you at Mount Weather."
"Clearly you didn't need my help." She says, making my anger spike.
"Clearly." I roll my eyes.
"You're angry, Hailey, but I know you." She says, her voice low as she leans in. "What you've done haunts you, and it's easier to hate me than to hate yourself." She leans back against the wall.
A small smirk makes it way onto my face as I say, "Oh, I can do both."
"Did that deal never really occur in your mind?" Her eyes narrow.
I immediately shake my head. "No, I don't betray my friends."
She tilts her head and confusion clouds her gaze. "But you did. You had friends in Mount Weather."
I grit my teeth before answering. "Those deaths are on you, too. The only difference is, you have no honor, and I had no choice."
She sighs, shaking her head before standing. "It helps no one to dwell on the past, and that's not why I'm here." She brushes off nonexistent dust on her shirt. "You're right. I'm not just letting you go back to your people. I want something more." She takes a step towards me. "I want your people to become my people. I'm offering Skaikru the chance to join my coalition, become the 13th Clan." She says and a small chuckle leaves my throat as I turn to look out the window. "No one would dare to move against you because that would be moving against me." She finishes.
I shake my head, a sadistic smirk taking its place on my lips. "Just leave me alone. I'm done. Do you understand that?" I narrow my eyes as I stare at her. "I left."
She sighs before crouching down in front of me. "You can't run away from who you are, Reskripa. Join me. Bow before me and your people will be safe." She says and white hot range fills me.
"To hell with you and your coalition." I spit, standing before her. "Bow before you?" I almost laugh. "You don't give a damn about my people. I know why you're here. I made you look weak at Mount Weather, and now the Ice Nation is exploiting that." I say and I see her shell crack. "Well, if you want the power of Reskripa or Jusdreinheda or whatever, kill me! Take it." I seethe, stepping closer to her. "Otherwise, go float yourself because I will never bow to you." I grit my teeth, refraining from saying worse things.
She narrows her eyes before nodding to herself. "Let me know if you change your mind." She says and leaves.
----------------
Lexa, of course, trying to befriend me gave me free reign of the tower with the adage of a permanent guard on me 24/7.
I open two double doors to a bedroom and spot a familiar form looking down from the balcony.
I walk up to him and mutter, "Well, if it isn't the Prince of Azgeda." I say, looking out over the city. "How do you feel after being double crossed?" I almost smirk in his direction.
He sighs, "Don't be fooled. I'm a prisoner here, same as you."
I nod to myself, "You're the reason I'm a prisoner here." I grit out.
"Relax Jusdreinheda." He chuckles, still not looking at me. "I'm here to help."
I roll my eyes. "Sure you are."
"Commander promised to lift my banishment if I delivered you safely. She broke our deal." I see him eyeing me from my peripheral. "I'm willing to strike a new one with you so we can both go home."
I raise an eyebrow at his words before finally bringing my eyes to his. "I'm already going home." I say.
His eyes squint while a smile dances at the corners of his mouth. "Then you won't have a chance to get what you really want."
I tilt my head before asking, "Which is...?"
This time he really smiles. "Revenge."
I break the eye contact and return my gaze to the movement of people below the tower. "You want to kill her. So kill her." I say, leaning on the balcony.
"You can get close. I can't." He says, making me glance at him. "You'll find a knife under your bed when you return to your room. I've already bought enough of the guards to get you out of here." He says and the repercussions of this cross my mind. I'd be hunted and hated by the other 11 clans. "If you do this, Azgeda will take control of the coalition, and you'll find a strong and grateful ally in the Ice Queen."
Orla crosses my mind. I glance away from him as I picture her. Would she be mad or grateful?
I sigh, fully turning to look at him. "And why should I trust her? From what I hear, she's worse than Lexa."
He shakes his head. "That's because you've been talking to Orla and Lexa." He purses his lips. "You can trust her."
"Are you implying that I can't trust Orla?" I say, taking a step towards him.
"No, she's my sister." He sighs, shaking his head. "But, she is closer to our mother."
"I trust Orla more than I trust you." I say, narrowing my eyes. I turn and begin walking away before stopping and looking over my shoulder. "Give me a day to decide."
I exit the room and see the two guards behind me. "Can one of you get Lexa to meet me in my room?"
-----------
I once again find myself sitting on the small window seat watching the men, women, and children run the streets below. Do I really want to wage war against this? I already killed innocents once, could I do it again?
I hear the knob turn on the door, which makes me stand, gripping the knife up my sleeve.
Lexa walks in, her eyes finding mine immediately. I glance away, knowing that she'd come to stand next to me.
After a moment of silence she joined me and I strike.
I shove her against the wall and place the knife against her throat. However, her eyes are dull. There's no fear, no anger. Just nothing.
I will myself to shove the blade into her jugular but nothing comes. Lexa was only trying to protect her people. The innocents that she has vowed to protect. The name tags of the children come to mind.
The memory of walking through the Mount Weather preschool makes tears spring to my eyes. Their homework laid out on the desks and their coloured in name tags on their backpacks.
Without realising it, I drop the knife and stumble backward. A sob racks through me as I almost drop the floor, but Lexa catches me.
"I'm sorry." She murmurs as she watches the tears trail down my cheeks. She lets me sit on the bed before saying.,"I never meant to turn you into this." She sighs, making my jaw clench. "You're free to go. Your father is here. I'll have you escorted to him." I glance up at her.
"I have a better idea."
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I'm escorted to my father and Abby, as promised. And to my surprise, my father hugs me when he sees me.
"I'm glad you're okay." He says, making a small smile form on my face.
"Me too." I say before clearing my throat. "I have something to tell you, and we don't have much time." I watch their reactions for a moment before saying, "The Commander's changing the terms of the summit."
Kane's eyes narrow. "Is this because of Mount Weather?"
I shake my head. "This is because of the Ice Nation. They want Lexa dead. They want to take over the coalition." I say, glancing between them.
Abby rolls her eyes, "That's Lexa's concern, not ours."
I go to speak, but Kane beats me to it. "No, Abby. If Lexa falls, the Coalition shatters, and there's no way we avoid that war. You said there were new terms." He brings his gaze to mine.
I nod, "We become the 13th Clan."
Abby's eyes narrow. "13th Clan? What does that mean, that we follow Lexa?" She says, imperceptible rage present in her voice.
I nod. "Yes."
"We came here to negotiate a treaty." She presses.
"This is our unity day, Abby. You can be the 13th station, or you can be the 13th Clan." I cross my arms, watching her and my father.
She glances at Kane and mutters a small, "Marcus?"
He sighs, staring at me. "Hailey's right. I've seen the Ice Nation army, and we don't stand a chance against them. We need to do this." He says and nod.
Abby turns to me, "So we become the 13th Clan. Then what?" She says and a smirk begins to form on my lips. "What's gonna stop the Ice Nation?"
"Jusdreinheda."
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a/n
wooo!!!
break happened and i didn't write so ummm sorry :/
anyway, here's this extra long chapter!
i love you all sm!!!!
please vote and comment <3
abigail