The pair quickly made it back to Alex's dorm. Alex was set down on the floor as Samuel turned to
close the door.
Wiping the tears from his face, Alex moved to leave to anywhere that wasn't near the caregiver.
"Not so fast, buddy." Samuel said, getting a hold of the little's arm.
"We need to have a little talk." He said, leading the boy to a chair.
"A little talk?"
"A little talk."
oh crap.
He knew exactly how this was going to go. Samuel would do everything he could to make him feel as embarrassed and upset as possible. Or- Samuel would just be understanding and kind and talk to him in that gentle and soothing voice, which would just make him feel all fuzzy and-
"Hey hey, it's okay. What's going on?" Samuel asked calmly, cupping the boy's face and wiping the tears that had formed.
"No.." The boy mumbled, pushing away his caregiver's hands.
"Alright," Samuel started, clearing his throat.
"Well, let's begin, shall we?" He sighed, putting a hand to his own face.
Alex looked up at him with big scared eyes.
"Let's start with headspace. Have you ever regressed before?" Samuel asked
Alex shook his head.
"Alright, so you don't have an idea of an age range?" He asked gently
Alex shook his head.
"Alright but if you're having accidents, we can assume-"
Alex shook his head, face turning red.
"No? No what? You have been having accidents. That's not really a yes or no-"
Alex shook his head.
"Okay, alright. I was just trying to say that we can assume you're below about 6."
Alex looked up at Samuel, slightly very offended.
"It's nothing embarrassing, lots of littles have trouble making it to the bathroom while in headspace-"
"No." Alex managed out, pout on his face.
"Look-"
"No."
"No? Alright, plead your case." Samuel said, giving a dramatic motion to the space between them. He wasn't annoyed per say, but he was tired and having a little who denied even being classified as a little, was a bit irritating.
Alex hesitantly cleared his throat.
"I um," He started, looking up at the caregiver who had his arms crossed and eyebrow raised.
"It wasn't an accident-"
"So you wet your pullup on purpose?"
"No!"
"Then it was an accident."
"I just couldn't get the straps off in time-"
"So it was an accident."
"No! I was just right there-"
"It doesn't matter how close you were, it was an accident."
Alex looked at Samuel, lips pursed in frustration.
"That's not fair." he settled on, crossing his arms.
"What's not fair, honey?" Samuel asked, sighing as he leaned back in his chair.
"That! You- I- You!" Alex said, bringing his knees up to his chest .
"Me? What am I doing that's not fair?" The caregiver asked, now sitting up.
"You- You-" Alex began, breath speeding up, "You-" His breathing was still speeding up. "You-"
"Alright, come here. You're okay." Samuel sighed, pulling the boy into his lap.
"I- You-" Alex tried, he was hyperventilating now.
"Its alright, you're alright. It's alright." The caregiver shushed, rocking the boy slowly.
Alex looked around frantically, breath shaky and uneven.
"Oh look what we have here? Remember this?" Samuel asked with an enthusiastic tone, pulling out the little's pacifier and placing it in his mouth. The caregiver was quick to hold it in place as soon as he realized the little attempting to take it out. Within a few minutes, the boy's breathing slowed and he was once again sniffling, soother bobbing rhythmically as he sat snugly on the caregiver's lap.
"What's got you so worked up? And though I have no problem with it, you have cried a lot today." Samuel whispered, continuing to rock the boy slowly.
Alex sat silently for a while before he spoke.
"I'm scared" He began, whispering as well.
"It's all so much and I'm scared." He continued.
"You know what? Sometimes I get scared too." The caregiver said in the same hushed tone, as if what he was saying was a secret to be kept between the two of them alone.
"What's too much?" Samuel asked, adjusting the boy on his lap.
"It's just all so new." He responded
"Well that's why I'm here." Samuel reassured. The boy however, stayed silent.
Samuel paused, taking a moment to look at the boy.
"Is it something about me?" He asked, eyebrow raised.
Alex practically shrunk down. He had no idea what he was feeling, let alone how to express it.
"I promise I won't be mad, just tell me what's on your mind." Samuel tried, tapping the boy on the nose, causing him to let out a small giggle.
"It's just- I'm not used to people caring so much-" Alex whispered, barely audible.
"And you just know how to make me feel so- so small." He mumbled softly
"Well, I'm glad to hear that. That means I'm doing this mostly correctly." The caregiver said with a small smile.
Alex felt his face go hot as he turned away, returning to use of his soother.
"I haven't been doing this perfectly, however. We were supposed to go over rules and expectations during first period. But someone was a little too shy, which is okay." Samuel said, ruffling the boy's hair near the end.
Alex hummed, kicking his feet slightly.
"Alright, how about we do some homework and then we'll go over some rules. Afterwards, we'll get you ready for bed, okay?" The caregiver said, setting the boy on the floor.
"mmm." The boy hummed, "Want Bunny." He settled on, moving to put his sleeve in his mouth, but hitting the mouth shield instead. He was starting to feel that fuzzy feeling again.
"Alright, do you know where you put him?" Samuel asked, standing up and beginning the search for the boy's beloved bunny.
Alex shook his head, looking around as well.
After a few minutes of looking, the search became more frantic.
"Bunny?" The boy asked, looking up the caregiver with sad eyes.
"We'll find him, honey. Did you have him when we left the class?" Samuel asked, trying not to panic.
"I dunno.." Alex mumbled, looking scared and worried. He didn't remember having his bunny. he remembered holding onto the caregiver as tightly as possible.
"Okay, do you know the caregivers of the girls you were with?" Samuel tried, pulling out his phone.
Alex shook his head slowly.
"Okay, that's alright. Let me see." Samuel said, finding the contact information of Jackson's caregiver.
Finding the contact, Samuel decided to call, which would hopefully be faster than waiting for a text.
"Hello? Nathan! Nathan, so-" He began before Alex lightly tugged on his shirt.
"Hold on, yes?" He said, pulling the phone away and looking at the boy who whispered his request, "Bunny?"
Samuel sighed, "Hold on, Alex. Nathan, does Jackie happen to have Alex's Bunny?"
A pause from Samuel's end as he listened.
"Alright well do you know who does?.. Cyrus and- Oh! Little Sophie? I haven't seen her in a while-"
Another tug on his shirt.
"Okay alright, do you know which dorm their in? .. Okay alright thank you. I'll talk to you later," Samuel finished, ending the call and putting his phone in his pocket.
"Bunny?" The boy asked again
"Yeah, Sophie has Bunny. You know Sophie, right?" The caregiver said, putting the little's keys in his pocket and extending his hand out.
The little hummed, taking the hand and allowing himself to be led to their destination.
Passing by the desk again, he noticed Lucas typing away at the computer.
"Hi!" The little blurted, waving slightly as he was lead past him.
Lucas looked up, smiling when he noticed Alex. He returned the wave before returning to work.
"Alex, don't talk to him." The caregiver sighed as they entered the needed hallway.
Alex looked at him, not fully understanding but nodding anyway.
They made it to the desired dorm, and Samuel knocked a few times before waiting. Alex felt
himself become embarrassed and shy, so he did the only understandable thing there was to do,
hide behind his caregiver.
The door opened, revealing a tall man, a bit taller than Samuel, but more scary looking.
"Hey, I think Nathan told you I was stopping by?" Samuel asked, trying him best to also reassure Alex who was clinging to the back of him.
"Yes he did, the rabbit, correct?" The man asked, looking inside and motioning for someone to come forward. Sophia appeared, Bunny plushie in hand.
"Here you go!" She said happily, handing the plush over to Samuel.
"Why thank you, miss Sophie." Samuel said, ruffling her hair, which caused her to giggle.
"Look! Did you see my dress?" She asked, the fluff of her dress poofing out as she spun in a little circle.
"You look absolutely precious. You always have the cutest outfits and oh!- I love your hair, did your daddy do it for you?"
"Mhm!"
"Well I'd love to keep talking sweetie, but I need to make sure Alex does his homework." He explained, whispering the last part.
"I know someone who also needs to do work, right?" The other caregiver said, patting Sophie on the head.
"m'kay." The girl giggled, returning back into the room.
"Well thank you, Cyrus. I appreciate it. Have a good night." Samuel said, smiling as he picked his little up.
"Yeah, no problem. I'll see you around." The man said, closing the door as they turned to leave.
"Bunny.." The boy mumbled, playing with his bunny plush.
The caregiver hummed, holding the boy close for the rest of the way to his dorm.
When they got back, Alex was set on the floor, this time with his Bunny.
"Age check. How many fingers?" The caregiver asked,
Alex blushed, covering his face.
"I'm big!" He claimed, attempting to make his way to his bed.
"Uhuh, well go on and do your homework." The caregiver said, going to sit down in a chair
After a while, Alex had finished what little homework he had been assigned. He laid on his bed, watching gameplay videos on his computer as Samuel continued typing on his computer.
"Alex, come over here." Samuel said, typing the last few words on his computer before looking up.
Alex slowly made his way over to the caregiver, choosing to sit on the floor in front of him.
The caregiver looked at him with an eyebrow raised, but chose to say nothing.
"Alright, so this is what we got." He said, looking back to his computer.
Alex bit his lip, looking unsure.
"Be safe to yourself and others, make responsible choices, be respectful to yourself and others, especially other caregivers and teachers. Every bad behavior you get caught doing gets reported to me."
The little huffed, looking down at his bunny.
"And I don't have punishments exactly, I'd like to think of them as consequences."
Alex messed around with his bunny's floppy ears. He would rather not listen.
"..timeouts, writing lines, and that's about it." Samuel said, smiling gently at the boy.
Alex had only heard the ending, but he already didn't like it. Who did this guy think he was? Thinking he was able to tell him what to do and punish him for not doing it.
"Anything you'd like to discuss or change?" The caregiver asked, closing his computer slightly.
"Why rules?" Alex asked, squinting at the caregiver with a tinge of anger.
"Why? Because I'm supposed to make sure you have structure and routine. I'm here to encourage you to be safe and all that." He explained.
"Well what about you?" Alex challenged, sitting his bunny up in his lap.
"Me? What about me?" Samuel asked, completely closing his computer.
"What about your rules?" Alex asked, petting his bunny plush on the head
"My rules?" He said, pausing for a moment. "Alright, that's fair. Go ahead, what rules or boundaries do you want to set?" Samuel said, putting his computer to the side.
Not expecting this turn of events, Alex merely stuttered.
"Well I- um-" He began, "No- No embarrassing me." He settled with
Samuel chuckled, "How do I embarrass you?"
"You- you baby me!" Alex responded, covering his face with his bunny.
"Honey, I'm supposed to treat you like the age you feel and act." Samuel explained, amused smile on his face. It was funny to hear the boy admit in a way that he had been feeling so small.
Alex only whined softly into his bunny.
"Alright, alright, I'll try not to embarrass you, okay? Is that all?" The caregiver said, covering his mouth with a hand in attempt to hold back a laugh.
The little merely nodded slightly as he kept his face covered.
"Oh! I forgot to mention, bedtime is at 9:30pm. That could change based on your official age range in a few days." Samuel said, standing up
Alex began sputtering, "What!? Bedtime? You can't actually do that!"
"Honey, it's in the regressor's guide, remember? I don't set the base bedtime, the school does. I'm only allowed to move it up as a 'punishment' if I want to." the caregiver said simply.
"You- You can't do that! That's not fair!" Alex said, now standing up as well.
"Calm down, I'm not doing anything. I told you, typically, I'll talk to you first before any consequence is given. Timeouts are the go-to, maybe no treats, no tv or videos, writing lines, and then maybe an earlier bedtime if you've been especially defiant." He said, putting his computer away.
"Early bedtime!? Samuel!" Alex shouted, stomping his feet slightly.
"Now you're going to stop that right now. You're not about to have a tantrum with me when you can talk about what you're feeling." Samuel said sternly, crossing his arms.
Alex huffed, looking away.
"Alright, it's only" Samuel checked his phone, "Six thirty, so you have a good while before you go to sleep."
Alex scoffed, walking to his bed and sitting down.
"Okay, well I'm going to go now. I trust you to go to bed on time. I'll see you in class tomorrow morning." Samuel sighed, walking over to Alex and messing with his hair before turning to leave.
"Sammy!" Alex blurted, surprising himself
"Hm?" Samuel let out, turning around to look at the boy.
"I- goodnight." He murmured, looking down.
"Goodnight, Honey." The caregiver smiled before leaving and closing the door.
Alex was left in his room alone. That's what he wanted, right? He didn't want Samuel around, right? He was just some golden boy who was assigned to take care of him and- Wait, that's right.
"He's just here 'cause he has to be." Alex whispered to himself.
And for some reason, that hurt.
drip.
Samuel was putting up with him because he had to.
drip.
He had said it himself, it was just "job" to take care of him.
drip.
He didn't really care about him.
And now he was crying. Again.
He laid down. Still in his clothes from that day and decided to watch movies and shows on his computer until either he fell asleep or his computer died.
He fell asleep watching strawberry shortcake.