Chrissy Cunningham was an all-around nice girl, and everyone in Hawkins agreed. She was a pretty, fit, and seemingly happy head cheerleader. Her boyfriend, Jason, was the captain of his basketball team. A more perfect couple couldn't have existed. I recall gazing at the two of them from afar during their clandestine lunches at school; It was like looking at an L.L Bean ad in motion. Jason always seemed to find a way to make Chrissy feel special, not that he really had to. On Valentine's Day she would get dozens of deep red roses delivered to her desk, or on Christmas he would make a show of getting her something lavish. I secretly wondered what it would be like to be the object of someone's affection; I wondered what it would be like to be something everyone had ever hoped and wanted for. But Chrissy and I couldn't have been any more different, so the idea that this would happen to me was out of the question. I would simply resign myself to fantasizing about a life that more closely resembled her own.
It wasn't that I was unattractive, if anything, that was part of the problem, according to the faculty at Hawkins High School. My long legs and ample bust scared the boys my age but beckoned older men. I had piles of curly flaxen hair that puffed out even more in the humidity of the summer; I didn't bother to tease it further, even though it was considered in fashion to do so. I'd been told that I could pass for Traci Lords. In short, I possessed a sex appeal that I didn't even understand. My parents were hippies, true children of the 60's who had both ended up getting busted for drug trafficking when I was in middle school. I remembered the day when the woman from social services had dragged me from my class to explain this to me and further explained that if I didn't have any extended family I would be placed into foster care. My parents were not exactly close with their own families; My father had left a small town in Luckenbach, Texas once he hit sixteen to avoid ending up a cattle rancher. My mother was Pottawatomi and lived on the Match-e-be-nash-she-wish Reservation outside of Wayland, Michigan. My father and her met at a bar outside of the reservation and she never returned. I had my mother's surname of Mukwa because her and my father never legally married. This left me with no family to turn to, at least none that I had known how to contact.
Hopper, who had ironically been the one to arrest my parents, declared he would take me. I assumed it was due to him feeling guilty about putting me in such a situation, but I never pushed to ask why. Hopper wasn't bad to live with, his only real rule was that I call if I was going to be late. "Shouldn't you be out with your friend or something? It's Friday." He asked when he noticed I was still holed up in my room in an oversized Grateful Dead t-shirt. I shrugged as I turned the page of my book, it was 'The Hobbit', and I was so enthralled that I had forgotten my lack of a social life. I had never been invited to birthday parties, sleepovers, or even just out to play. Hopper tried to make up excuses, but I knew it was because the parents of my classmates didn't feel comfortable with them being around me after everything with my own family had occurred. Only when I was sure he had left for the evening did I feel comfortable enough to rifle through my stash box.
I made sure to blow the smoke out of my window, I would light a candle or something after; Incense was out of the question, as it would just make it more obvious. I was sure he had an inkling, but I think he was happy it wasn't some other more deadly substance. Or maybe he just felt bad because I didn't have any friends. My mind mulled over these thoughts while 'In the Flesh?' echoed through my room. 'So, ya thought ya might like to go to the show?' I had assumed the lights outside were just some lost hikers with their flashlights. 'To feel the warm thrill of confusion' But the lights didn't seem to be that of this world...God this pot was better than usual. 'That space cadet glow' I shut the lights off in my own room and peered out the window to get a better view. 'Tell me is something eluding you, sunshine? Is this not what you expected to see?' It was coming from the laboratory, that I was most certain of, I felt my breath hitch in anticipation. 'If you want to find out what's behind these cold eyes. You'll just have to claw your way through this disguise.' Before the guitar riff could begin, an almost demonic noise echoed over the speakers. I felt my heart racing as the lights that were once off began to flicker rapidly. "What the fuck." I muttered as I backed into the corner of my room. I began to wonder if Reefer Rick had laced this weed, but it all seemed too vivid to just be a hallucination.
I don't know how long the whole ordeal had lasted, but at some point, I must have blacked out. When I awoke my room was pretty much the same as I had left it, though the needle on my record player had completed its revolutions and lay lazily off to the side. "What the fuck." I muttered before reaching over and twisting the knob to shut it off. My mind jumped to the lab, and how Hopper had made a few vague comments on how they had been doing some top-secret government stuff up there that even local authorities didn't know about. I had just assumed it was him being somewhat dramatic, but now I was beginning to understand that there was a real possibility that it wasn't just rats they were testing. I looked at the clock and noticed it was only 9:30 and he would be at work well into the morning hours, though I contemplated calling the station to make sure he was okay. I ultimately decided against it; the last thing I needed was him thinking I was losing my mind. I would just simply wait and see if he casually mentioned anything tomorrow morning, until then it would just be me leering out my window to see if anything otherworldly would pass by.
The next morning was like our usual Saturdays, complete with one of his female friends rolling out of his room in one of his shirts. I rolled my eyes when she seemed shocked at my presence as I stood in the kitchen with a spatula, her eyes darted to the drip coffee maker on the counter. "Help yourself." I said before turning my attention back to the scrambled eggs I was pushing around, I reached over to crack two more for our 'guest'. Once she grabbed her mug of coffee she slipped back into the room with Hopper, I could smell his cigarettes, so I knew he was awake. "I didn't know you had a daughter." She also didn't realize how thin the walls were, or maybe he didn't either. "She's not my daughter." I flinched slightly at his gruff response; I had always somewhat held out the hope that he may consider me like one, but I suppose this was naive of me. I knew he had a daughter, and he had drunkenly confessed to me that she had died at a young age. When I had come to live with him, I wasn't exactly at the cute and adoptable stage of life, and I was a little more seasoned than other middle schoolers. But for some reason it still made my chest ache, and my throat dry up, so much so that I simply shoveled the eggs and toast onto a plate before grabbing my denim jacket and slipping through the door.
The crunching of leaves under my boots was almost melodic, as I strode through the dense woods. I thumbed the wadded-up bills in my pocket that I had attained by painting targets and collecting shells at the gun range the cops used. It was enough to get a zip of weed from Rick, and maybe something to eat after. Part of me felt bad for not letting Hopper know that I had left, but then I remembered his comment and shook any guilt from my head; It's not like I was his kid, right? Why would he even care? My mind went to Chrissy Cunningham who I'd imagined was waking up to some picturesque Cleaver household; Her mother was probably vacuuming in pearls while they chatted over breakfast. I bet her parents always asked where she was going, and I doubt she walked anywhere alone, not with Jason Carver as her personal chauffer. I immediately felt bad thinking about Chrissy. She had never been anything but nice to me, and I really didn't have any right to judge her.
Once I had reached Rick's house the air had gotten slightly warmer, I could smell the light scent of marijuana burning from the inside. I knocked softly on the door; I could hear someone shuffling around before turning down the King Crimson record that had been playing. "Hey Althea." He answered with a slight cough; I gave him a soft smile in return as he held the door open for me. "I have some company but make yourself at home." He gestured to the couch near the coffee table that had various substances strewn about, I could see smoke still rising from the chartreuse glass bong that was perched in front of a pair of legs clad in ripped acid washed jeans. I wasn't surprised to see Eddie Munson hanging out on Rick's couch; I would have been more surprised if I was seeing him in class. Eddie seemed bewildered at my presence but gave me a slight wave, I could see the thick marijuana smoke trickling out of his pursed lips as he tried to hold it in.
"She's cool, Eddie." Rick reassured him, he must have noticed the concern on his companion's face. I could see Eddie visibly relax as he released the hit before offering me the bong. "I just thought you live with the cop..." I shrugged as I took a deep inhale, I could feel the fragrant smoke fill my lungs. "He doesn't care what I do." I choked out with the fragrant smoke; I sounded more annoyed than anything. Eddie held up his hands defensively, but I also noticed the small grin pulling at the corners of his mouth. "Sorry...I just haven't had the best interactions with them." His explanation was self-explanatory, everyone knew he was a delinquent. I shrugged and turned my attention back to Rick, but I could feel the pensive gaze of Eddie still on me. It reminded me of Steve Harrington in my health class, his eyes always darting away once I noticed his stare. It didn't make me uncomfortable or anything, it was just peculiar as if he wanted to ask me something but was too timid to.
Once I had gotten what I had come for, I figured I would continue with my big day alone. "I'll walk with you." Eddie said as he popped up from the couch, almost knocking into the table with his knees. I contemplated telling him 'No', but the image of Chrissy being walked to Jason's car flashed before my eyes. "Suit yourself." I said nonchalantly as I bid farewell to Rick before striding out the door. I could hear the jangling of Eddie's wallet chain behind me as I began my walk to nowhere. I had to admit that I didn't necessarily dislike the company, though I would be hesitant to admit it aloud. I was simply not used to being around anyone but Hopper, so maybe this was actually good for me for a change.
"So... you want to grab something to eat?" He asked breaking the silence after about five awkward minutes. I could feel my face get hot, the only time I had eaten at a restaurant with someone else was when Hopper took me to a diner for pancakes after the ordeal with my parents. I remember sitting at the booth with the high stack of slightly burnt pancakes draped with golden syrup and fat strawberries, my stomach groaned with the memory. "I'll take that as a yes." He said with a light chuckle; I could scarcely hide my embarrassment. I had neglected to eat this morning before I stormed off in a silent rage.
It was as if he had read my mind, we ended up at a similar diner. I didn't even have to look at the sticky menu, my mind was already set on pancakes. Once we placed our orders, I could see Eddie fidgeting with his hands. "You're not embarrassed to be seen with me?" I was a bit taken back by the question, he noticed my quizzical look and elaborated. "Well, I mean I'm not exactly the quarterback of the football team." I scoffed; all our sports teams were terrible anyways. "I'm not exactly the head cheerleader." I rebuked just as our food was plopped in front of us, these looked better than I had imagined with fat blueberries and oozing golden butter. I quickly tucked into my meal, not noticing Eddie's amused look until I was three bites in. "What?" I said after wiping my face. "Nothing, it's just you're really enjoying those." I couldn't tell if he was trying to insult me, but it didn't stop me from continuing my meal. "I like it." He added before poking at the Denver omelet on his own plate. We sat in silence as we finished our respective meals. When the check came, his hand shot out too quickly for me to even attempt to pay the bill.
I assumed we would part ways, but Eddie insisted we smoke at 'his spot' in the woods. The spot turned out to be an abandoned picnic area, where we sat at the only intact table. It didn't take long for the questions to roll in. I was satiated, which made me a little more receptive to answering. During the interrogation, I found out that he and I were not so different. We had similar childhoods and current situations, but we had very different tastes in music. "Steely Dan?" He sneered before laughing. "I can't get into the heavy stuff." I said as I blew out a slow stream of smoke; I noticed his eyes lingering on my mouth. "I'll make you a tape." He suggested as he snapped out of his trance to skillfully pluck the joint from my hand. "I have a band, Corroded Coffin." He coughed slightly. "You should come watch us play tonight."
I couldn't tell who was more nervous in this situation. Eddie's knees bobbed up and down as he waited for my response, which was held up in my throat. I knew Hopper would not approve of me cavorting with the town outcast, but at the same time, I wasn't his daughter. I could hear his voice over and over again, 'She's not my daughter'. "Ok." I could see the subtle exhale from his chest that he tried to play off with a calm smirk. Honestly, I was excited to go, and it would be another Saturday watching M.A.S.H. with Mr. Not-My-Dad. That way he didn't have to feel weird about having one of his 'dates' over, even though it was so obvious he was pining for Joyce Byers.
Eddie offered to walk me home, but I lied and said I had to make a stop on my way home. He insisted on picking me up in his van, even though I said I didn't have a problem just meeting him there. We agreed on seven o'clock, that would give them time to rehearse before the show. I imagined what Hopper would say when he saw who was picking me up, and I had already rehearsed my rebuttal: "I'm not your daughter, remember?". Was I doing this to get back at him? Maybe a little, but I did like the idea of having friends. And honestly, it wasn't like Eddie could really influence me in anyway shape or form. Hopper knew I got high, but it didn't keep me from getting better grades than a good percentage of my class.
He must have known that I heard his comment because he was really trying to butter me up. "How about tonight we rent a movie and order a pizza? Just the two of us?" Normally, I wouldn't have passed up this arrangement, but the thought of doing anything even remotely familial with him was out of the question. "I'm going out with a friend." I said nonchalantly, trying to play it off like it was completely normal. "What friend? Where?" I rolled my eyes, I anticipated this. "A friend from school." He followed me into my room, I could see his cop senses tingling. "Name." I had to tell him, or he'd find out. "Eddie Munson." From his reaction, you would have thought I had said Charles Manson. "No! Absolutely not!" The moment I had rehearsed was here, but I found it a lot harder to say it in this moment. "So what? I'm not supposed to have friends. Nobody else wants to hang out with me, and when someone does, it's not the right person?" I could see his face freeze as if he didn't know what to say next, and this only made me angrier. "I just don't want you getting mixed up in his bullshit." I could see his brow furrow as he searched for the right words. "But I am trusting you to make good decisions, because I know your smart enough to know better."
"Is everything ok?" Eddie asked for the fifth time as we drove steadily down the dirt road that connected the cabin. "Yea, it's nothing." I answered once again, though my mind was picturing Hooper sitting in his recliner staring blankly at the television as I left. I felt a combination of guilt and pissed off. Who was he to make me feel bad? I had been honest with him. "Well, you look nice." My driver said trying to break the tension. I perked up at the compliment because I barely went anywhere. I had taken the opportunity to dress up more than usual. Eddie seemed very surprised to see me in a black dress with white polka dots and a rhinestone studded denim jacket. I could feel the sides of my mouth curl into a soft smile. "There it is!" Eddie exclaimed, almost losing control of the car in the process. "I've never seen you smile before." He pulled a soft pack of cigarettes out of his front pocket as we turned into the parking lot of The Hideout.
'Hopper would hate this' was all I could think when I looked at the dive bar, though it only made it more appealing. "Can I have one of those?" I asked in the sweetest voice I could muster as I motioned to the cigarette in Eddie's hand. Without hesitation he held out the pack for me and immediately lit his zippo with a flick across his jeans. "Your full of surprises." He grinned with amusement as I took a deep drag, exhaling after I could feel it deep in my lungs. "Everybody smokes." I retorted before taking another deep drag, noticing that they were the same brand that Hopper smoked. "You want some?" He held out a flask to me, which I quickly declined. "Suit yourself." He shrugged before taking a swig. I was happy that he hadn't pressed, I was afraid of alcohol because of the effect it had taken on my mother in the time I belonged to her.
Eddie instructed me as to where I could observe the performance, this way he could find me after to take me home. I stood awkwardly in the corner near the speakers and edge of the bar waiting for Corroded Coffin to open their set when a somewhat familiar voice rang out. "Althea?" I spun around to face the 'King of Hawkins' Steve Henderson, who seemed just as surprised to see me. "Hey Steve." I replied clearing my throat, I noticed the small entourage behind him of Tommy H and Carol who were casually tonging each other as usual. "What are you doing-I mean do you come here often?" He seemed to realize that we were both underage in the same bar, but I'm sure it wasn't his first time. "Eddie invited me to watch his band." I answered nonchalantly, not really finding it to be too outlandish that the two town misfits had somehow teamed up. "Eddie Munson?" He seemed irritated with this news, as if me being with Eddie was some type of dark mark. I could feel a tick of annoyance with the tone of his voice; Eddie hadn't been anything but nice to me. "What's wrong with that? He's nice enough." I retorted in a defensive manner that even surprised me. "I don't know, just be careful, he has a reputation."
Before I could answer Steve, the speakers blared on with Eddie's voice announcing his band. I turned to face the stage, but I noticed Steve didn't return to his friends. He stood with me to watch the performance, and I could almost see a glimpse of annoyance on Eddie's face when he glanced in our direction. Maybe they didn't care for each other; I couldn't tell you as the politics of Hawkins High were as foreign to me as one could imagine. Eddie did look cool up there with the blue lights and guitar strapped around him. I felt a small rush of excitement to see my first live concert that wasn't Hopper dragging me along to see James Taylor.