Three Idiots and a Ghost

By salkim03

393K 30.9K 14.6K

3 + 1 = 3 ... idiots and a ghost! Cooper Smith, the clueless one. Archer Lee, the awkward one. Skyler Rose, t... More

3I1G (3D1P #1) - Idiotic Introduction
When an idiot showered
When three idiots attacked
When a ghost said hi and received a f**k you
When a cat gave a piece of his mind and a ghost got a name
When a ghost fell asleep
When a ghost possessed an idiot
When an idiot danced
When an idiot got passionate about bananas
When a ghost said sorry and received a fart
When a ghost imagined a creepy idiot
When an idiot turned dumb
When a ghost snuck around and pissed off an idiot
When a ghost dreamed of an idiot
When two idiots were in class
When an idiot cried Ringu!
When someone never got a reply
When an idiot worried too much
When an idiot got violated
When an idiot and a ghost had a nice time
When an idiot kept himself busy in his room
When an idiot was utterly clueless and another idiot lost his manhood
When a ghost went undercover
When someone passed by
When an idiot went to a gay bar
When a ghost felt sorry
When a ghost finally learned something about herself
When an idiot failed again to remember a girl's name
When a ghost couldn't look in the mirror
When a ghost got two bad pictures and a passible one
When three idiots and a ghost celebrated
Miniseries: A Cat's Chagrin (Part 1 of 2)
When a ghost ran away
When an idiot didn't like someone
When three idiots got into character
When a ghost watched the news
When two idiots skipped class
When a ghost got a friend she could relate to
When a ghost couldn't do anything
When a ghost knew this was farewell
When an idiot couldn't be awkward
When a ghost didn't know
When an idiot's grandma came to visit
When an idiot was possessed by evil spirits
When a ghost went on a trip
When a ghost remembered
When a ghost found acceptance
When three idiots sort of kidnapped someone
When a ghost found forgiveness
When a ghost reached her last day
When three idiots and a ghost said goodbye
Miniseries: A Cat's Chagrin (Part 2 of 2)
When three idiots spent a day without a ghost
When three idiots, a ghost, and a cat got interviewed
When an idiot wrote a Pattwad story
3W1Z (3D1P #2) - Introduction (Because I've decided to move everything here)
Because breathing is pretty cool (Part 01)
Because breathing is pretty cool (Part 02)
Because breathing is pretty cool (Part 03)
Because there are no second chances in death (part 01)
Because there are no second chances in death (part 02)
Because there are no second chances in death (part 03)
Because you can let yourself be heard (Part 01)
Because you can let yourself be heard (Part 02)
Because you can let yourself be heard (Part 03)
Because you can better yourself (Part 02)
Because you can better yourself (Part 03)
Because you will get to places (Part 01)
Because you will get to places (Part 02)
Because you will get to places (Part 03)
Because it opens you up to new things (Part 01)
Because it opens you up to new things (Part 02)
Because it opens you up to new things (Part 03)
sgniht oder nac uoy esuaceB
Because only live bodies feel warm (Part 01)
Because only live bodies feel warm (Part 02)
Because only live bodies feel warm (Part 03)
Because there's always another chance (Part 01)
Because there's always another chance (Part 02)
Because there's always another chance (Part 03)
Because ghosts don't have friends (Part 01)

Because you can better yourself (Part 01)

166 15 3
By salkim03

"Hey, Bradley found a live one this time!" the buddy said, who Ever learned in the truck was called Ross.

Ever was hauled over Bradley's shoulder as they entered what looked to be an abandoned cabin from the outside. But the inside was well-furnished as if someone was actually inhabiting the place.

"Huh? Is Tom not here yet, Peter?" Ross asked the only person who had been in the cabin prior to their arrival.

"He's on his way," Peter replied.

While those two went on to talk about their week so far in the kitchen, Bradley gently lowered Ever down onto the sofa. She looked around in search of just one thing: an exit. The front door would be too obvious and easy for her kidnappers to chase after her, but perhaps she might be able to escape through a small window somewhere. The men didn't exactly bother to tie her up, so all she had to do was find the right tactic and timing.

She noticed there was one other room in the cabin a few steps from her, which seemed to be the bedroom. And lucky for her, it had a window. Then, the moment Bradley walked away from her to join in on the other two men's conversation, she would bolt straight for that room, lock the door, and jump out the window.

Ever gulped. The plan was simple enough, but she was visibly shaking at the thought of executing it. What if she tripped and fell? What if the door didn't have a lock? What if her fingers slipped while trying to open the window and the men came bursting in?

Though these three looked like any average middle-aged guy you would see on the street, they were dangerous people after Ever's organs for whatever reason. And she got to learn exactly what that reason was very soon.

"Mmm, the soup smells great," Ross said after opening the lid for a huge pot cooking over the stove. "It'll go great with the girl's liver."

"Man, I can't recall the last time I got to eat some fresh, female liver," Peter said, licking his lips.

"Are you psychos cannibals?!" Ever blurted out in shock.

Peter turned around to look at her and casually replied, "Yeah. Didn't you read the instructional pamphlet on the way here?"

"What?!"

"Oh, right," Bradley said. "Totally forgot about the pamphlet."

"God damn it, Bradley!" Ross said. "You had one job while I was driving. One job!"

"I-I'm sorry..."

"What's rule 12 of our cannibal club?"

"Education before mutilation. Inform before they're torn..."

"Right. We've got to tell the missy what's going to happen to her before we do anything. For Peter's sake, we're not barbarians!"

"We're not barbarians..." Bradley repeated like a puppy that just got scolded.

"Yeah, so go get the pamphlet."

"Okay."

Though Ever wanted to make a comment on how ridiculous it was for them to be so organized about this when they were still a bunch of ravenous cannibals, she had bigger things to worry about. With Bradley outside at the truck and Ross and Peter quite a distance away, this was Ever's chance.

Fearing she wouldn't move at all if she stalled even a second more, she cleared her head of worries and ran at full speed for the bedroom. The heaviness in her footsteps immediately alerted the two men in the kitchen of what was going on.

"Hey, what do you think you're doing?!" Ross shouted at the door that Ever managed to lock just in time. "You haven't read the pamphlet yet!"

"You can shove that pamphlet up your ass!" Ever shouted back, sliding the window open to make her escape.

"But that'd be painful!" she heard Ross reply just before she jumped outside.

Ever's heart was thrashing in her chest as she glanced around to assess her surroundings. There were trees in all directions except for the single dirt path the men had driven on to get to the cabin. She weighed her options. It was either going in the same direction she had come from at the expense of making it easier for the men to follow her along the apparent trail, or she could run the opposite way deep into the woods, not knowing where she could end up. However, there was no need to contemplate that just yet anyway as Ever didn't even take five steps forward before coming to a complete halt.

"Oh, boy! We're in for a feast tonight!" Bradley told his two friends who had also come out in search of the girl.

Ever stuck close to the cabin and peeked around the corner. Upon witnessing the scene a few yards away from her, she whispered to herself, "Those idiots..."

Hauled over each of Bradley's broad shoulders were Walt and Warrick, the former staying calm while the latter thrashed around to be let down. In one of Bradley's hands was the cannibal club's official pamphlet.

"What luck," Ross said. "The girl just took off, too."

With that, all the guys headed into the cabin, leaving Ever with now three options to weigh.

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