(064 - In Your Arms)
Song For Chapter: Into Your Arms by Witt Lowry ft Ava Max.
Omo, the last chapter was just one big emotional roller coaster. Demilade Jordan don chop insults for this life ehn 😂, it's funny and at the same time, it's sad. And Toyosi, her first appearance in the book and a lot of people are already disappointed... great 💀.
It is well o.
Let's hope this chapter eases all the tension... or maybe it will build more tension.
Another kind of tension 🌚.
⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆
𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐀𝐑𝐘
(Hilary Idara Eghosa)
Simisola💕
I'm outside your house.
I just finished chatting with my mum when I got that WhatsApp message from Simisola, plunging me into deep confusion.
Even though I couldn't help the little excitement that started bubbling in my chest, I also couldn't help the feeling that there must be something big that made him show up at this time of the night. Besides, It didn't make sense that he was standing in front of my house at the moment, especially since we parted ways about an hour and a half ago.
Did something happen where he went to?
I quickly jumped down from my bed and ran out of the room, rushing down the stairs carefully but also in a frenzy. When I got to the door, I looked to the peephole attached to the door for precautions, just to be certain that he was actually in front of the house like he said he was.
He was.
And even though I couldn't see his face because his head was hung low, his hair and the cloth he had on gave away that it was really him.
But there was something seriously off about his aura.
I could feel it, even with the door serving as a barrier between us.
And when I unlocked the door and opened it, I saw it. I saw exactly what I felt.
Simi was slouching, badly. His stance was sloppy and unhinged, and the fact that he was leaning his hand against the doorpost felt like he was just trying to hold up his entire frame as if he was having trouble standing on his own legs.
I wasn't even sure his mind was here. He was here... physically, but his mind must have traveled miles away from here, if not the opening of the door would have alerted him. But he was stoic, unmoved and his gaze was on the floor like he found the tiles interesting.
Seeing him like this DISTURBED me.
"Simi," I called him, making sure my voice was as soft as possible, scared that any form of intensity night break him.
He jerked slightly like he was just coming back to reality, proving my assumption right. His mind definitely was here all this while.
And when he looked up at me, I froze.
Jesus Christ.
His eyes. They were bloodshot; deep red... crimson.
"Simi!" I gapped in horror, a sharp gasp punctuating my scream.
He knew how he looked, and he knew I could see it clearly. I'm sure he did. And from the expression on my face and the tone of my voice, he could obviously tell that I'd figured out that something big was up.
But you know what this guy did? He smiled.
Simi smiled.
And that terrified me to pieces.
"Hi,"
He muttered with that smile still playing on his lips. His voice came out in a croaking whisper, an indication that he has been crying a lot, further solidifying that I wasn't hallucinating his bloodshot eyes.
What is this?
"C-Can I come in?" He asked, glancing into the house.
Utterly dumbfounded, I stepped aside to create ample space to let him walk through. He mustered what might be a smile of gratitude, pushed himself off the door post lazily, and walked in. I went in after him, closing and locking the door behind us.
Then I turned around to face him. He was backing me now, his hand over his head, fingers running continuously through this hair.
Simi was greatly distressed. I could feel it, and I could see it. It's been a while since I've seen him like this, this completely off his element. The last time was around the beginning when I was tutoring him and we weren't making progress. The frustration, the anger, the sadness, all of it.
But on God, it wasn't like this.
Never like this.
This Felt bad. It Looked bad. And it worried me to my bones.
I moved closer to him... carefully. I didn't need anyone to tell me that Simi was fragile at this moment and I had to be delicate with him. The last thing I wanted was to trigger something I shouldn't.
"Simi..." I began, my voice in a calm but cautious whisper. "What's wrong? Are you–"
"C-Can I stay over t-tonight?" He asked, gently cutting the rest of my own question off. His question came in the form of a plea and even though I couldn't see him, I could hear the begging in his tone, in the way his voice slightly broke.
And he still wasn't looking at me...
"I can't go home right now because I'll be all alone–"
That's strange. My brows furrowed in a confused frown.
In fact, everything about this visit was strange, not to talk of his whole demeanor and bloodshot eyes. The atmosphere was suddenly looming with something dark and harrowing, and this just boosted it. Chills, literal chills, creeped up my skin.
I didn't like this feeling.
Simi has been living in that house all by himself most of the time for the past month or so, and it hasn't really been a problem for him. Why is it one now?
I couldn't voice out my thoughts yet because he was still speaking, and I hoped that it will shed more light on my confusion.
"It's only for tonight, I promise," his decision not to look at me was deliberate. "T-This is the only place I kinda feel is the safest. I-I really hope you d-don't m-mind..." he trailed off when his voice wouldn't stop breaking and he couldn't help it, and my heart broke along with it.
I couldn't hold back anymore.
I moved closer to him and took his hand, the closest hand to my side, in mine. Thankfully, he didn't pull away. He allowed me to touch him, to hold his hand even though he still didn't turn around to look at me. So, I moved to stand in front of him instead, and immediately, he averted his gaze from mine. He deliberately didn't want me to look him in the eye.
Simi wasn't shy like this, especially when it comes to holding a gaze. So, this was so out of character for him. He has only done this a few times, all of those times being when he's trying to stop me from seeing him a certain way.
A vulnerable way.
How bad is this... whatever is going on with him?
It must be very bad to have made him cry. To make him this... detached from himself.
And the fact that he didn't want to stay at home on his own? Omo.
"You haven't had any problem staying at home alone before, Simi," I gently noted. He didn't say anything back, so I went on. "What makes this so different from every other time?" I asked him, trying to sound as persuasive as possible.
He started to shake his head, slowly.
"I-I c-can't stay in that h-house a-alone." His voice was breaking even more, and I let out a shaky breath.
One little push in the right... or maybe wrong direction, he'd break and let it all out... scream or cry. Right now, he's trying to bottle up so much and it's not a good thing. I knew that firsthand.
Either way, I'm ready to take that risk. His not wanting to go home had to do with whatever was happening to him and I needed to know what it is. There's no way for me to help him, or get him out of that problem if I don't know what's going on with him.
And I desperately... with all my heart, soul, and body, wanted to get him out of whatever this is.
So, I pushed... just a little bit.
"Why?" I gently persuaded him to tell me. "Why don't you want to go home?" I cajoled. He kept quiet, and just continued to shake his head, still religiously keeping his gaze away from me.
Oh, God.
"Talk to me."
I whispered, tugging him closer to me and he moved without hesitation. He wasn't fighting it, or me, and that felt like a good thing, as if he wanted to tell me but he didn't know how, or where to start. So, I squeezed his hand in mine reassuringly, letting him know that I'm here to listen.
A moment or two passed and Simi still wasn't speaking. But I didn't pressure him. I waited for him. I want him to do this on his own accord... because he trusts me enough to open up to me.
And finally, he did.
It started with him finally meeting my eyes, and my heart fell to the pit of my stomach.
His eyes were a lot redder, more bloodshot with fresh unshed tears brimming in them. Just one blink and the tears would start falling down his eyes in a torrent. This was the first time in a very long while seeing Simi like this, and it didn't look good at all. It physically hurt to see him like this.
"Simi..." I breathed, not knowing what else to say.
"I-I can't s-stay at home on my own," He repeated for the third time. But he didn't stop there this time.
"If I do... I might h-hurt myself."
Jesus.
A loud gasp escaped my lips at that, and my eyes widened in sheer terror at the gravity of his words dawning on me.
Hurt himself? Simi will hurt himself?
Oh, My God!
"Simi!" I whisper-yelled out his name in fright, closing the remaining distance between us. I rested my hands on either side of his face, cupping it close so that he'd keep his gaze fixated on me.
He didn't shy away this time. He kept his gaze on mine, teary-eyed and all. And when he blinked, the tears that had pooled in his eyes started falling in beads.
My heart fell even further to the pit of my stomach.
"Why would you want to hurt yourself?" I desperately asked him, begging him to tell me why he'd think about doing something so terrible to himself. "What's going on?"
He shook his head again, the tears falling more and more, soon accompanied by soft, barely audible sobs and quaking of his shoulders, breaking my heart into bits and pieces. I started feeling tears welling up in my eyes too. Seeing him like this overwhelmed me with so much sadness.
"Talk to me, Simi. Please, talk to me." I begged him, cleaning his tears with my thumb, but that didn't stop it. If anything, it increased; the sobs, the tears, his shoulders violently quaking.
It concerned me so much.
"Simi..." I begged again, searching his eyes desperately for an answer. "Please, tell me."
"M-My Mummy."
He choked out between tears, and a sharp breath automatically escaped my lips.
His mum.
My face immediately fell, and my shoulders with it. In fact, everything in bone deflated and shattered into a million pieces just by two words from him. Simi didn't have to say anymore for me to know what he meant, and for me to totally understand what this was about. That was all he had to say for it to finally make sense.
I knew I wasn't jumping to any conclusions. Simi cannot be crying like this, cannot be like this if things weren't as bad as I thought it was.
And it might just be a lot worse than I thought it was.
"Oh my God," I whispered.
"S-She's d-dying, Hilary." He cried, and I literally broke at that statement, the tears that has started brimming in my eyes finally finding a reason to start falling.
"M-My m-mummy is d-dying."
I broke even more.
God have mercy.
Not knowing what else to do, I just closed the remaining minuscule gap between us and gathered him in my arms for a tight, bear hug. He allowed me, falling right into my arms like he desperately needed to be hugged, his head falling dejectedly to the hallow of my neck as he cried his heart and soul out.
I gave it to him as much as I could, as bear as I could, trying to comfort him the only way I knew how to at this moment.
Words were completely out of it because they have failed me, and shock was even an understatement of what I felt. I was feeling so many things at the same time asides from shock; denial first, then the realization that this wasn't a drill and it was indeed real.
Then sadness. Gross, overwhelming, and harrowing sadness that threatened to tear my insides out.
All for Simi.
And I had absolutely no idea how to express them.
So I just held him in my arms because that was the best thing I could do for him. Hold him.
And when it seemed like his legs were about to give way and he was falling, I fell with him, still holding on to him as tightly as I could, cradling his head to my chest, running the fingers of one hand through his hair and the other hand soothingly against his back, letting him cry as much and as long as he wanted to.
And I cried with him, silently.
"It's going to be okay," I whispered gently, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. "It's going to be alright."
I continued to chant those words to him, wanting to reassure him as much as possible. But I knew firsthand that right now, things were far from okay or alright. I knew firsthand that this might be the beginning of a whole lot of tragedy.
And I prayed desperately in my heart that this brewing tragedy would be averted.
If not for anyone in that Family... for Simi.
"Simi?" I called softly as I walked back into the room, holding a cup of water in one hand and a byline that contained medications in the other.
My call was met with silence, safe for the faint sound of water running, an indication that Simi was still in the showers where I left him a few minutes ago. I tried not to overthink him spending so long in the bathroom, but it was hard not to, especially when moments ago he talked about harming himself.
I shook my head, trying to stop my thoughts from going down that part.
Simi won't hurt himself. He won't.
I really hope he doesn't.
I set the cup of water and nylon of pills on my bedside table and decided to wait an extra ten minutes for him to come out. If not, I'd have to call 112.
In the process of waiting for him, I couldn't stop my mind from deviating from everything that went down those few moments ago, what Simi said about his mum. He hasn't given me full details yet, and I wasn't going to ask him for one because of how triggering it might be.
But what he said was more than enough to put so much fear in me, even without the details.
I mean... How?
The last time we spoke about his mum, or rather, the last time I asked about his mum, he assured me she was fine, that it was all stress. This definitely didn't feel like stress anymore.
What could have changed overnight?
Or is this how it has always been that Simi didn't tell me... until he couldn't keep it anymore?
Whatever it might be, it didn't dissipate the gravity of what all this was. I can't even begin to describe how horrified it made me feel. And if I can be feeling all these harrowing emotions all at once, I can't begin to imagine what Simi was feeling. All the negative emotions.
He doesn't need this. Any of this.
God, Simi was the last person that deserved this.
A ringing sound cut through my thoughts, startling me slightly. At first, I thought it was my phone that was ringing so I reached for it. But it wasn't. The sound started again, and I followed the direction it was coming from to Simi's phone that was lying on the bed, right beside his folded pile of clothes.
After much contemplation, on whether to pick it or not, I decided to, reaching over to pick it. As soon as I leaned over and got a view of the screen, the caller ID immediately caught my attention.
Big Sis💕
What also caught my attention was the fact that there were about twenty-plus missed calls in his notification box, and they were all from her. And from the timing of the earlier missed calls, it showed that she has been calling way before Simi showed up here.
And that confused me.
Didn't he notice the missed calls?
"Hilary,"
Simi's voice came from behind me and filled the room, causing me to jump to my feet in a start. I turned around to find him standing in front of the bathroom door, his unclad torso and hair dripping with water, the small towel I had given him hanging around his neck.
I had been so distracted in my thoughts that I didn't hear the shower stop, or the bathroom door open.
At least he's safe.
"Hey," I mumbled with a small smile, my eyes involuntarily raking through his frame. He looked better, refreshed.
But I knew it was only physical.
There was still a storm brewing inside him. A dark storm. And by God, I wish I knew how to take it all away.
"How are you feeling?" I asked, moving a step closer to him.
He chuckled. It was an empty, humorless sound that had goosebumps sprouting on my skin and my heart sinking deeper and deeper into the pit of my stomach. I already knew his answer before he even said anything.
Heck, how am I expecting him to feel?
"You don't want to know, trust me." He answered.
I wanted to counter him so badly, to tell him that I wanted to know. And even if I might not know how to help, sharing his burden will make him feel lighter, even if it's only for a little while, hours maybe. I just wanted him to feel okay. I needed him to know that he doesn't have to do this alone.
But before I could voice out my thoughts, his phone started vibrating in my hands, then started to ring out. It was his sing see again. Simi followed the sound to my hand, then looked back at me quizzically. I exhaled, waving the phone as I walked closer to him.
"Your sister," I told him. "She has been blowing up your phone for a while," I said, handing the phone over to him. When he collected it, I expected him to pick up the call. I mean, I didn't expect any less because it was his sister calling.
But Simi didn't pick it up. Instead, he declined the call, then dismissively and carelessly flung his phone across the bed, and also with a hint of aggression in his toss as if he wanted to actually break the phone. Then he hissed under his breath- if I wasn't so close to him, I won't have heard, plopping down on the bed.
I was pretty much taken aback by that action, not expecting it at all.
That's his sister.
Abi it's someone else he saved as Big Sis?
"Why did you do that?" I couldn't stop myself from asking the question.
"I don't want to talk to her." Came his monotonous response. Now that confused me even more, curiosity-fueling in my chest and almost getting the better pet of me.
What's with the attitude toward his sister?
Every single time Simi has spoken to me about his sister, there was always this glow of adoration and pride that graced his face and lighted up his whole being. He was always so eager to talk about at every given opportunity.
But now, now of that groveling moment was present, and I knew for a fact that him not wanting to speak to her didn't have anything to do with his mood.
It was Personal.
But I didn't push it with him, not when he was in such a fragile state with his mind and emotions. The last thing I wanted to push him over the cliff he was barely tethering over.
So, I just nodded.
"Okay," I whispered.
If Simi was surprised I dropped it so easily, he didn't show it. He only stared back at me, watching me with an intense gaze. I averted my eyes from his, suddenly self-conscious and alert.
My senses were suddenly aware of the fact that it was just the two of us in this entire house, it was going to be just two of us all through the night. And even with the circumstances that put us in this position, the familiar feeling... and overwhelming tension that accompanied being in an enclosed space with Simisola was still very much present.
Just like it has always been.
And I could feel it in mass influx.
It didn't help that I was in a baggy shirt and shorts I supplemented from my Dad's wardrobe years ago, and Simi's top half was naked, taking my mind back to the moments we had at his place this afternoon- in his bathroom and his pool.
Fresh goosebumps started bumping all over my skin.
Now is not the time, Hilary. Now is not the time. I chided myself.
"I got you medications, just in case you need them."
I gestured to the items on the table, trying to get my mind to think of something else. It didn't help still, especially since Simi won't still say anything and won't stop staring at me.
Okay. He isn't making this any easy.
Just moments ago, he didn't want to look me in the eyes, and now, he was unashamedly, unbashful doing the direct opposite. He can't continue to look at me like that and expect me to remain sane... literally.
"Do you want something to eat?" I tried to deflect again, moving away from him. "You must be hungry. I can fix something for you real quick–" I didn't get far when I started walking away because Simi stopped me.
He grabbed my hand and pulled me back to himself.
A small shriek left my lips but it soon faded away when I felt his hands wrap around my middle, pulling me to stand between his parted legs. My breath caught in my throat when he leaned his head over and placed it against the area of my tummy, resting against it.
Then an exhausted sigh escaped his lips, penetrating through my shirt and breezing over my skin, running through me like a tidal wave. I shivered against him.
"Don't leave,"
He whispered, the tone of his voice in a plea. Even with my body covered, I could still feel his breath on my skin.
"Don't leave me," He added.
His words thawed every bit of self-consciousness I was feeling away in one heartbeat. I exhaled, physically deflating against him. Then I brought my hands to his head and cradled it against my body, eliciting a deep sigh of satisfaction from him.
He was way taller than I was, that even with him sitting, the distance between us wasn't a lot. His head was resting in the space between my belly and my chest; my upper abdomen, and all I needed to do was bend my top half a bit and I'd be at his level.
I ran my fingers through his still-wet hair, daintily sweeping and feeling the curls between my fingers, he sighed again, tightening his hands around me.
"You're okay," I whispered. He shook his head against me.
"I'm not." He murmured against my belly. It was my turn to sigh.
"But you are going to be." I tried again.
"I don't think I'm ever going to be." He debunked it again, and my shoulders slumped at that.
Oh, Simi.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked cautiously, hanging my head a little low so that I could look at him, but he shook his head slowly, burying his face further into my shirt.
"Not now," He answered. "Not today." And I nodded.
If that was what he wanted, then I have to respect his decision. But I really hope he opens up to me soon, for his own good. I know the kind of damage keeping things bottled up causes. It does more damage than the real problem.
"Okay," I whispered.
"Okay," He whispered back.
I continued to twirl my fingers through his hair, the water in it making it softer. Simi hummed softly.
"That feels nice." He mumbled, and an automatic smile appeared on my lips.
"Yeah?" I asked, massing my fingers further into the curly locks.
"Yeah." He answered, tightening his hand around me and pulling me further into himself.
My smile widened at that action. Leave it to Simi to always want to be as close to me as possible. Maybe this was his way of trying to distract himself from thinking about everything going on. If it was, I didn't mind at all. He needs a little bit of calm before whatever storm was about to blow up.
"I want to hold you," His voice was barely audible. I wasn't sure if he wanted me to hear him or not, but I did.
"You already are," I told him, punctuating my words with a light chuckle. But he shook his head.
"No. Not like this." He said, and I quirked my brows in question. "You are too far." He added, saying that more to himself than me. I couldn't stop the small laugh from escaping my lips.
Too far?
I smiled, wondering what exactly was going on in his head. He finally lifted his head to look at me, his lips in a small pout.
"Come here."
He shifted back, sitting down properly on the bed and pulling me along with him. I didn't protest or pull back, allowing him to pull me further between his legs. And when my legs knocked against the wooden board of the bed, he tugged me, his eyes asking for unsaid permission. It was then I knew exactly what he wanted.
At this point, I'm probably supposed to be scared or uncomfortable, but I didn't feel any of that. If there was anything I felt, it was excitement and a tiny bit of anticipation for what all this might lead to. And I wanted to see it. Besides, I didn't even have it in me to deny him anything at this moment.
So with my heart racing violently in my chest, I pulled myself up, steadying my hands on either of his bare shoulders before throwing my legs on either side of his. His hands automatically went around my waist to hold me in place, gently sitting me on his lap.
Basically, I was straddling him.
I pushed against him, locking my legs behind him and wrapping my hands around his neck before looking at him with a teasing smile.
"Better?" I asked him.
"So much better." He whispered, resting his head on my chest. I'm certain he could hear how erratic my heartbeat was.
I cradled his head to my chest, trying not to think of the fact that I had no bra on and he was legit resting his head directly against my boobs. Either he didn't feel it, or he did and didn't give a shit, Simi was so invested in being babied by me.
Omo, if my mum should walk in on this scene, I'm over dead.
But she's not here. No one was. It was just the two of us and I wanted to please my heart... and his.
"What does this mean?" I asked, brushing my fingers over the dark ink under his biceps. Simi rose his head and followed my gaze to the tattoo I had noticed earlier.
I was right about it being a Roman numeral- MCMXXXII was what it read.
"It's 1932 in Roman numeral." He answered. I looked at him for further explanation, because it must have some sort of sentimental or important meaning for him to have permanently tattooed it on his skin.
"It's the year my swimming idol slayed and won his first gold medal in the Olympics." He explained, and it immediately made sense to me.
"Yasuji Miyazaki, the Japanese," I noted, and an impressed smile appeared on his lips.
"You know your swimming history." He stated, and I chuckled.
"I think it was the same year my swimming idol won three gold medals in freestyle," I told him. He smirked.
"Helene Madison." He noted and my smile widened.
"You know your swimming history." I mimicked him from earlier, teasing him, and he laughed lightly... but heartily. It made my heart swell to see him like this.
But it didn't last for long. The laugh trailed off, replaced with a wistful chuckle. Simi shook his head, the chuckle reducing now to a very sad smile.
"Look at me talking and laughing about swimming when my entire world is on fire... literally." He said more to himself than to me. And the prideful swell in my heart reduced at that.
He feels bad.
"Hey," I whispered, cupping his head between my palms, making him look at me. "You don't have to feel guilty for wanting to distract yourself from the pain you feel, even if it's only for a few hours. It's a natural mechanism."
"I don't know if I can handle it, Hilary." He said to me, his voice quivering a bit.
"You don't have to do it alone," I whispered. He held my gaze for a moment, his eyes glistening with retained tears I knew won't fall. Then he nodded slowly and went back to resting his head on what might now be his favorite position, and I went back to holding his head against me.
I felt my shirt being pulled up slightly, before feeling his hands moving in to touch my bare skin. Everywhere the slightest movement of the tip of his fingers brushed against my body ignited flames of fire in its wake. I sighed in satisfaction, arching my back into him.
Ashewo girl. My subconscious mocked me, and I smiled to myself.
Well, we all have a bit of Ashewo inside us, don't we?
"Thank you."
I heard him mumble against my chest. I bobbed my head to the side, bending it slightly so I could see his face. His eyes were closed, and I'd have easily believed he fell asleep if I didn't just hear his voice.
"What for?" I asked him.
"For being here," He answered in a heartbeat. "For always being here." He added.
Pride welled up in my chest and a smile stretched at the corners of my lips. I ran my hands down his bare back and felt him shiver against me.
"You'd do the same for me," I said.
"Nah, you don't understand." He raised his head again, arching his neck so that he could look at me. "Things are about to get really shitty for me... l-like catastrophically s-shitty..." his voice broke slightly, causing his words to trail off.
Sadness overwhelmed me for him.
"But in all this," He continued. "I know I can count on you to always be there for me." He said, a small smile playing on his lips. I automatically smiled back, nodding.
"Of course. Always." I promised him. He sighed, resting his back and me holding him.
I can't begin to imagine the whirlwind of emotions and haiku of negative thoughts running through his mind right now. And the fact that he was holding it together this well? I can't even fathom it. Someone cannot just find out that their mum is dying and still be this put together.
It wasn't possible.
This was tough for Simi. I could see it... could feel it. And I wanted nothing more than to take it away, take his pain away, even if it was only temporary.
With that thought- that decision... and my heart beating faster than it previously was, I casually adjusted my position on his lap and loosened my hands around his neck to hold his shoulders. Then I lowered my head to his left shoulder...
...And pressed my lips against it.
A sigh escaped his lips, followed by a low hum... then his hand tightened around my bare waist.
"I like that."
His voice came out in a husky whisper, and I smiled, his words all the approval I needed to keep this going.
"Yeah?" I whispered back, and he hummed in response, pushing me against him.
I lowered my head again and pressed a kiss to his shoulder again, this time. A low, approving growl escaped his lips, fueling my courage.
"You like this?"
"Yeah... don't stop."
Came his husky order, and that was all the go-ahead I needed. I continued pressing small, lingering kisses to the skin of his shoulder, eliciting soft, breathless sighs from him, sighs that only edged me on to give him more.
So I went on, trailing kisses up his shoulder to the hollow of his neck, and that earned a big reaction from him. A sharp breath escaped his lips and his hands around my waist tightened, his fingers gently clawing on the skin of my back, pushing me further and further into him like he wanted to fuse my body into his.
I buried my face in his neck, pressing more kisses into it, nibbling on his skin. I caught a whiff of my body wash scent mixed with a tiny bit of his natural androstenol scent, loving how much he smelt like me. He seemed to like the neck kisses very much, with a lot of soft gasps and low grunts escaping his lips anytime I nibbled on a spot.
His head was off my chest, now leaning against my collarbone. Every small, sharp, and breathless sigh that escaped his lips fanned my skin, causing goosebumps to sprout on my skin. Even my breath was becoming shallow and coming out in soft pants, courtesy of his hands roaming over my bare skin, gently clutching and clawing anytime I did something he liked, pressing me against him.
This moment was having just as much effect on me as on him.
We were basically in uncharted territory right now. This wasn't me on a normal day, and it wasn't something I have done before, even in the past. Even with Simi, he was always the one making the moves, and I'd follow. He was always the one pushing me over the brink... and enjoyed watching every single reaction that crossed my face while at it.
Now, it's my turn.
I wasn't sure where the mind to make all these moves came from. But did I regret it? Absolutely not! Seeing how much effect I had on Simi made me want to do more.
And with how encouraged I felt, I trailed my lips up his neck and to his earlobe and took it between my teeth.
"Fuck!"
He gasped out in a throaty groan, dragging his hands to the small of my back, dangerously close to my butt. I didn't mind, didn't stop him, taking his earlobe between my lips and darting my tongue out to touch the skin. And when I moved my lips to his face, sensually brushing my lips over his cheek till it was hovering above his lips, he opened his eyes to meet mine.
And my breath hung in my throat at the emotions that clouded his eyes; Adoration, Want, Lust... Love.
It scared and excited me at the same time.
They were core emotions that should have made me jump off him at that moment, but I didn't. I didn't want to.
Ani you are an Ashewo! My Subconscious repeated.
"You live wire..."
Simi growled out, his voice all shades of SEXY.
It emboldened me.
I bit down against my lips to stop the smile from making its way to my lips, and in the process, teasing him. His eyes won't stop darting there, and I knew he was having so much trouble holding back from kissing me at that moment.
I ran my hand over his clear skin, his toned abdomen, feeling his up all the way to his chest, feeling his pecs beneath my palms.
That elicited a loud groan from him, his eyes widening as his hands finally dropped to my butt, palming the flesh in place. My eyes widened as well when I felt the swell against my thigh.
Damn!
"Fuck, Idara!"
I swear, my middle name has never sounded so Sexy!
"Do you want to kill me?" His voice was so deep and husky.
Whatever force has taken over my body immediately left, replacing the former, shy Hilary that would never have gotten this far. My eyes widened even more as embarrassment filled me. My head fell to his neck, an embarrassed cry leaving my lips.
"I'm sorry." I couldn't even meet his eyes anymore. "Let me get off."
I squirmed against his lap, trying to get off him. His eyes widened even more and he quickly grabbed me, stopping me from getting off him.
"Hold still."
He said through gritted teeth like someone in pain, his tone breathless. It was after he said that I realized my squirming against him to get off was only making things worse for him. I didn't only know this... I could also feel it.
No, literally... I could feel it.
Shit!
"I'm so sorry," I muttered, feeling extremely embarrassed for the both of us. He exhaled shakily, his head dropping back to my chest and his hands tightening around me.
"It's okay..." He sounded so out of breath, his tone raspy and rough.
"I just... Fuck!" He trailed off, cussing mid-sentence. "Just hold still. I only need a minute." He finished, panting lightly, his breath fanning my skin through my shirt.
Damn...
"Just give me a minute." He added, and I nodded, trying to catch my own breath.
We stayed in that position for a moment, holding unto each other like lifelines. Initially, I wasn't sure it would help the situation but it eventually did. Everything came back to normal... literally.
Simi rose his head to look at me, and every form of embarrassment or awkwardness I thought would spring up away into thin air when. I saw the shy... yet incredibly charming smile playing on his lips. I couldn't stop the small, shy giggle that escaped my lips as well.
"I think I'm good now." He breathed.
"Yeah?" I muttered, my lips tugging into a small smile.
"Yeah. But that was... WOW!"
He sounded dazed, in awe... and it was in a good way. He didn't even have to tell me what "that" meant before I knew. And the fact that he sound and looked so astonished and mind blown was such a huge stroke on my pride. Hell, the fact that we didn't have to kiss before I earned such a reaction from him was the icing on the cake.
And to think this was all new for me.
I couldn't stop my smile from stretching wider.
"I'd have you know," I began, throwing my hands back around his neck. "that was an uncharted territory for me," I admitted. His eyes widened slightly, surprise overtaking his features.
"Really? Not even with–" I shook my head before he could finish. He didn't have to complete his question before I knew who he was going to refer to.
"Not with anyone, and not even with him," I said. And I chuckled at a thought. "We didn't even kiss," I confessed.
His eyes widened more.
"Wow..." He whispered. "So you haven't had your first kiss?" He asked, and a small laugh escaped my lips.
"First kiss? No, I haven't."
Being in a relationship with Jidenna was like being in a relationship with a long-time best friend, it's so hard to see each other past the friend zone. Being intimate was weird for us and we didn't go past holding hands and hugging each other. The first time we tried kissing, we pulled away right before our lips touched, laughing off the awkwardness that came right after.
And before Jidenna, there was no one... and I wasn't one to go around being intimate with just anyone.
So yeah... I haven't had my first kiss. Yet.
My admission brought a smile to Simi's lips and I wondered what was so funny.
"What?" I asked in-between chuckles.
"I haven't had mine too..."
Now that was totally unexpected.
"What?" I blinked in shock.
Simi, a nineteen years old male hasn't had his first kiss.
Wow!
Color me Shocked.
Color me Intrigued.
Color me IMPRESSED!
"Shocking right?" He asked rhetorically, chuckling. "I haven't had that much of a romantic life in the past. I mean, back then, who would want to date the dumbest guy in the entire class, yeah?" He laughed.
I wasn't even sure whether to find it funny as if he did, or feel bad. Maybe both. Hell, I couldn't find my voice because I was still pretty shocked by the revelation.
"But now that I think about it," he continued speaking, holding my gaze intently with his, all form of teasing and joking gone. "It's sort of a blessing in disguise, and it's all worth it now because I get to share as much of my firsts with you as I can, if not all–"
I legit melted at that.
"–Because you are going to be my first kiss Hilary Idara Eghosa... and I'm going to be yours. And I promise you, I'm going to make sure it's one of many, one we both will never forget."
My breath caught in my throat and words failed me. All I could do was stare back in a daze, blinking dumbly. It felt like he just made an order and I was accepting it. Heck, it didn't sound like he was leaving any room for argument or disagreement... not like I will, when it's not as if I'm mad.
Because on God... I can't wait for him to fulfill that promise.
It was already late in the night, so everywhere was quieter... relatively peaceful.
It didn't take long for Simi to fall asleep after... well, our moments. He just laid his head on my chest and just like that, he was off. It was a little tasking getting myself off him with how tightly he had his hands wrapped around him, and laying him on the bed properly without waking him up. But I got it, eventually.
Now he was out like a light, snoring softly beside me, his hand still wrapped around my middle protectively.
I can't begin to imagine how exhausted he is.
I couldn't help but stare at him, my hand involuntarily going to his face to trace the perfect outline of his beautiful features, especially the cupid bow of his lips. That was all I could do since I couldn't fall asleep.
No matter how hard I tried not to, especially since it was none of my business, I couldn't shake away the thought of Simi being in a sort of conflict with his sister, especially at a time as delicate as this for the both of them.
This wasn't the time... whatever was up between them, this wasn't the time. And I wish I knew more, maybe everything will make better sense then.
Simi's ring stone pulled me out of my thoughts. I cringed a bit because of how loud it was in the quietness of the room. I looked at Simi to see if it had disturbed his sleep, but he only stirred, mumbling incoherently in his sleep before nodding off again.
I gently took his hand off my waist, threw the blanket off, and came down from the bed, grabbing the phone along with me. I checked the caller's ID.
Big Sis💕
Oh wow. This is certainly not a coincidence.
The phone stopped ringing, then started just a moment after. I sighed, glancing at Simi's sleeping form over my shoulder while contemplating whether or not to pick the call. For his sister to be calling as much as she was, it has to be important.
Heck, I'm certain it is important. Everything about their family is important at this time.
I picked the call.
"Oh thank God! You picked!" A heavily accented voice, quivering with so much gratitude... and a hint of sadness filled my ears before I could even say hello.
"André, don't hang up. Please, don't hang up. I get that you are pissed... and you have every right to be pissed at Dad and Me, but it wasn't our intention to hurt–"
This was where I knew I had to let her know she wasn't actually speaking to her brother before she spills more than she was supposed to.
"Hi, Toyosi."
The words left my mouth before I could think of my method of greeting.
Hi? Shouldn't I have said Good Morning... or evening?
And Toyosi? Is that disrespectful? Should I have called her Sister Toyosi... or Aunty Toyosi?
There was momentary silence on her end of the call. I can legit imagine the confusion going through her head right now.
"Who is this?" She finally spoke. "And why are you with my brother's phone?" She demanded.
Very fair question.
Now stop fidgeting and answer the damn question, Hilary.
"Uhm... my name is Hilary–"
"Wait," She stopped me. "Hilary Eghosa?"
My eyes widened.
She knows me.
"Huh... yeah," I answered.
"Simi's Hilary." She said.
Oya, just burst my brain.
I couldn't stop the smile that started to appear on my lips. I was blushing out of my mind. This was meant to be a serious moment, but see me blushing like a fool.
"Yeah... I guess I am." I responded.
"Wow," She breathed. "Never thought I'd be meeting you under such atrocious circumstances–" Damn, she's so well-spoken. "–But don't worry love, we'll have a do-over. I desperately need to speak to André." She pleaded with me.
I exhaled, looking back at Simi again. He was still sound asleep. The last thing I wanted to do was disturb his sleep. And even if I had to wake him up to take this, there is no guarantee he'd want to speak to her... just like he didn't want to earlier.
"Is he there?" Toyosi asked me. It wouldn't even be ideal to lie to her.
"He is, but he is asleep right now."
"Bullocks..." She muttered, and I felt so sorry for her. From the desperation in her words, and her plea from earlier, this was a big deal to her. I wish there was more I could do.
"I could leave a message..." I offered.
"There is no need for that," She said. "You know what? It's fantastic I got to you instead. I need you to do me a Favour."
𝐀/𝐍
Seems like we are about to have a sister and girlfriend (well, soon to be girlfriend) alliance, and I'm here for it... anything to get Simi to see past his anger. His anger is totally justified but it's not really worth it when it's keeping me further away from his mum at this time.
Abi what do y'all think?
Simi and Hilary just be totoring someone with intimate moments that won't lead to kiss😒. Simi is too much of a gentleman. He wants to do things right. But this his gentlemanly-ness is depriving us of smoochies🥹. Soon sha, very soon🌚.
We will get to see another Simi/Demilade clash in the next chapter... and omo, it's won't be pretty. Simi can't be gentle when his Mum's life is involved.
Till then, you know the drill. Kisses 😘.