December 24th 2022
Manhattan, New York
9:08 am
"Are we gonna get on the subway?" Amina questioned as she sprayed her travel sized YSL Libre on her body, a favorite that she always had to have in her collection. Without getting an adequate amount of sleep, she was up and ready to go. Where? She didn't know, but since Rashad was a native, she knew she was in good hands.
"Fuck no, I haven't been on the train since I was in school." Rashad replied, he was busy putting his locs into a low ponytail. Amina assumed he chose a low ponytail so he could wear the Mea Culpa beanie he had placed in arms reach. "I thought that's how y'all got around down here." Amina spoke, Rashad looked over at her and lightly chuckled.
"I thought that's how y'all got around down here." He mocked her, adding exaggeration on her southern drawl. Amina briefly chuckled before waving him off. "I'm taking you to Harlem—so I can show you around my city." Rashad explained as he sat the beanie on his head. Amina nodded her head in response. She didn't know if she was thinking too hard, but him wanting her too see where he came from almost felt like he wanted her understand him on more than a surface level.
"This the tourist part, everything mad expensive. The bacon, egg, and cheese be like $8." Rashad spoke, the duo left their hotel room and took the elevator down to the lobby before hopping in the all black Cadillac truck. Rashad voiced that he didn't want to deal with getting Ubers during the Christmas Eve rush, so he opted for a chauffeur.
"GoodMorning." Amina greeted, which surprised the driver.
"You're not from here are you?" He questioned as he looked into the rear view mirror. He was an older man, Amina guesstimated that he was in his late 40s. "Nah—she from the south." Rashad answered for her. The driver lightly chuckled as he nodded his head.
"I love the south—it's comfortable and stile." He replied, Amina nodded her head as a small cordial smile dressed her face. She looked out the window, taking in the city around her. She could agree that the city lived up to its busy reputation. And Christmas being 24 hours away didn't make it any better. Amina couldn't help but notice the influx of homeless people, she always wondered what their stories were and how they ended up in that position. She would never forget the one week she was homeless before going to Travis'.
Amina dug into her purse and retrieved two loose twenty dollar bills, she used her knuckle to roll the window down. "Excuse me sir, merry Christmas." She called out to catch his attention, the man looked up with a look of relief on his face.
"I was just wondering where my next meal would come from, thank you so much—God bless you Merry Christmas." He spoke with tears forming in his eyes, Amina shot him a smile as tears formed in hers as well. Before she could say something else the driver hit the gas once the light turned green. She rolled the window up and wiped away her fallen tears.
"That's dangerous, them niggas don't be having nothing to lose. New York different, he coulda tried some funny shit." Rashad spoke.
"I know, but he seemed so nice." Amina replied, "I was out there before and it ain't sweet, people treat you like shit without knowing your situation." She added, reflecting on all she endured that week. She recalled sleeping wherever there wasn't a lot of people or traffic, she'd wake up in the morning and freshen up at a local gas station and go to school as if nothing ever happened.
"You can't be too nice, especially up here." Rashad spoke, Amina slightly sighed. "It seem like good people live bad lives and bad people live good lives." Amina voiced.
"You don't even know that man Mi." Rashad lightly chuckled for a second, "I don't, but still—when I was in that position I definitely didn't deserve it." Amina replied.
"Like diddy—he's a horrible man, but lives a good life." Amina pointed out, Rashad subtly scrunched up one side of his face. "A good life is subjective though. He might have cars, money, clothes, and jewelry but still be empty inside. None of that shit truly fulfills you, only suppresses for the moment." He expounded, Amina nodded her head in agreement. Rashad was very smart and she loved it. She eagerly awaited his replies, as they always picked her brain.
"You're right." Amina announced, "Now what happened to make you homeless?" Rashad questioned.
"After I left my dad's house, I stayed with my old best friend. Her mom was a dancer and would leave her money around until she was ready to go to the bank. One day a stack of her money went missing and she blamed me—and kicked me outta her house." Amina explained, telling the story didn't bring up any emotions for her—anymore, back when it was fresh and every time she thought about it she swore she was gonna whoop Niecey's ass when she saw her again. They didn't go to the same school, which made that promise very hard to keep. Amina knew deep down in her heart that Niecey stole her mother's money and framed it on her, but blood was thicker than water and Niecey's mom would've never believed Amina.
"How you end up with your uncle?" Rashad questioned, "I saw an ad for his firm at the bus stop—I remember crying so hard because it like a sign from my mama." Amina explained, she stopped and furrowed her eyebrows together at how easily Rashad had her opening up and telling her business.
"Wow—seem like God never took his hands off you, I don't know if you heard it lately but I'm proud of you. Some shit that coulda broke you built you up." Rashad spoke, tears edged Amina's lower eyelid. Just when a single tear fell, Rashad reached over and used his thumb to wipe it away. "Rashad." Amina called out, Rashad raised his eyebrow in response.
"Why are you doing this?—making me feel so comfortable." Amina questioned. She didn't think he wanted her on a relationship level, so she was confused as to why he was acting like this.
Rashad shrugged, "I just never go against what feel right." He replied. Soon the car stopped, Amina looked through the window to see that they were in front of a small corner store, a bodega to be specific. Amina had heard about them, but this would be her first time coming to one. "Don't come out, imma come get you." Rashad announced, Amina nodded her head as she unfastened her seatbelt. Shortly, Rashad came around and opened her door for her.
"Why do New Yorkers try to play southerners about eating from gas stations, when this is the same thing essentially—just no gas." Amina queried, she stuffed her hands into the pockets of her Moncler as she looked up at him.
"That's why it's different, it's no gas here. Eating out a place that sell gas is mad dirty." Rashad explained, "Don't y'all wear clothes outta here? That's dirty." Amina playfully argued.
"You can't beat a white tee for two dollars—especially when you a young nigga. Personally, I'm not on that timing no more. Imma target kinda nigga." Rashad spoke, causing Amina to chuckle. He swung the door open and let Amina go inside before her. They walked over to the refreshment fridge and picked out a drink each. Rashad got an Arizona and Amina got a Snapple.
Amina turned around and came face to face with a gray cat, fully relaxed while laying on a row of Debbie cakes. "He the manager." Rashad announced once he saw the confused expression on her face, she cracked a lite laugh while following him to the deli's line.
"You want breakfast?" He questioned, Amina nodded her head yes, it honestly didn't matter. Once the person in front of them stepped away, they stepped up.
"Rashad! Where you been kid?" The man behind the register spoke, obviously excited to see Rashad. "Dallas, you good though?" Rashad replied, the man nodded his head.
"I can't believe I watched you grow up—seem like we almost the same age." He joked, resulting in both him and Rashad laughing. "This your girlfriend?" He questioned as he turned to Amina.
Rashad lightly chuckled as he shook his head no, "Nah, this my friend—Amina." He clarified. "Well nice to meet you Amina." The older man extended his hand to shake Amina's.
"Nice to meet you." Amina smiled, while shaking his hand. "Her food free—you gotta pay for yours." The man announced, Rashad laughed before waving him off.
"Let me get two bacon, egg, and cheese—add salt, pepper and ketchup." Rashad spoke, it was a culture shock not to hear "Please" "may I" or "Thank you". The southerner in her was clutching her pearls.
"Got you—I'm not playing though, the pretty lady's is on the house. You owe me $4." The man spoke, Amina lightly chuckled, "Thank you." She replied.
"I'm just fuckin with you Shad—just make sure you come back and see me." The man voiced, Rashad nodded his head before replying, "Good looks and I got you."
The duo stepped to the side and awaited their food. Amina could tell Rashad was well respected in his neighborhood, many people walked up to acknowledge him and hold a brief conversation. They interacted with him as if he was "hood royalty." This was the same privilege that allowed them to get their order way before people who were in line before them.
They headed back to the truck, where Rashad watched Amina take her first bite. "It's good—it's just a breakfast sandwich." Amina announced as she twisted off the top to her Snapple.
"You trippin—this 100 times better." Rashad replied before taking a big bite of his sandwich, only leaving him with half of it left.
Amina half shrugged, "I wanna try a chopped cheese before we leave." She announced, Rashad nodded his head. "I got you."
"Hold on for me right quick Ken." Rashad demanded the driver to stop, "You see that building right there." He pointed out the window, Amina nodded her head yes.
"That's the original Blue's Corner—my uncle only had it for about two years before he had a dream that Blue's was in Texas, so he packed up and followed his dream." Rashad explained. "Wow." Amina replied above a whisper as she eyed the small building.
"When was that?" Amina questioned, fully interested in the story. "The late 80s, I know he brought Blue's to Dallas in '92." Rashad explained.
"I never knew that—you should get a mural painted dedicated to him in Blue's and share the story." Amina suggested, Rashad looked at her with his head slightly tilted before he began to nod. "I just might have to do that—good looks, kid." He replied.
December 25th 2022
Manhattan, New York
10:48 am
"You sure you don't wanna come with me?" Rashad questioned as he pushed his feet into his Rick Owens boots, Amina eyes stayed on her phone as she shook her head no. "I'm good." She replied, finally laying her phone on the empty space next to her and gave Rashad her attention.
Rashad was on his way to Drea's to watch Sahara open her gifts, this was his first time seeing Drea after their peculiar encounter, which made him not want to go but his niece didn't have anything to do with that and he wasn't gonna let Drea's freaky ass make him break a promise to his niece.
"You sure you wanna be all alone on Christmas?" He questioned, just to make sure. Amina lightly snickered, "I get the sense that you really want me to come with you." Amina voiced. Rashad looked over at her and fell into a short daze, he recalled her repeating that she looked a mess after being out all day but he didn't agree. She was picturesque at all times, little to no flaws could be found.
"I do—it's Christmas and I don't want you sitting in this room by yourself." Rashad replied as he sat on the bed, "I'm okay Shad, I promise—I don't want it to be weird..I really don't know your sister in law." Amina spoke as she sat up against the headboard.
"She not my sister in law, my brother ain't married to that ho." Rashad mumbled, "It's not weird...you know me." He followed up, he realized Amina was firm in her stance, so he decided to drop it. He didn't want her to go anywhere she wasn't comfortable going anyway.
"But alright—imma see you, call me if you need me." He added while pulling his phone off the charger, Amina nodded her head before replying, "Alright, be safe."
"This my city, I'm always safe." Rashad impudently replied. He said one more goodbye to Amina before departing the hotel room, he stepped on the elevator and pushed the lobby button. While the hotel went down, his mind was clouded as he wondered how this was going to go. He didn't want Sahara to pick up on any static between the two, but he also wasn't interested in faking it.
Once Rashad made it to the lobby, he walked through the revolving door and hopped in the truck. "Merry Christmas." He greeted the driver as he fastened his seatbelt.
"Merry Christmas." The driver replied with a small smile and head nod, Rashad pulled his phone out of his pocket and went to his thread with Amina.
You good?
Amina
Yes🤣you haven't even been gone 30 minutes.
I know, I'm just making sure.
Amina
I'm good, go have fun!
Rashad let out a small sigh as he stuffed his phone back into his pocket, he focused his attention out the window. The streets were pretty dead due to it being Christmas Day, the only people that were out was the homeless and junkies. It didn't something odd to Rashad to see people who were on drugs when he was a child were still in the same predicament. That was one of his biggest fears, not exuding growth and staying in the same position for too long.
Harlem was known for having the most "zombies" as they would call them, they roamed the streets in slow motion while being high out of their minds. It was known that some of them had been out there for years, like Snuffy, who was nicknamed by Rashad's peers after one of the crackheads in the movie Crooklyn. It was word around the city that he was laced by his sister's boyfriend in hopes of taking his portion of their late mother's insurance money. Rashad couldn't think of a time he didn't step outside and see Snuffy walking around, higher than a damn kite.
In little to no time, Rashad arrived at Drea's Brownstone. The scene was still the same, cars parked in front the large building and a plethora of trash scattered around, especially on the sidewalks. For a moment this made him appreciate the south—they cook pride in their communities, shit like this would never fly down there.
Rashad knocked on the door and took a small step back. While waiting his eyes studied the wreath Drea had hanging from the door, he lightly chuckled knowing Sahara had a major hand in decorating it. The wreath was pink with multicolor accessories on it. Suddenly, the door flew open revealing Drea. She was dressed in a red and black plaid pajama onesie, with a pair of house shoes on her feet.
"Merry Christmas." She greeted in a jolly tone, Rashad slightly made his face up. "Whatever nigga." He replied as he slightly pushed passed her and stepped out of his shoes. Sahara's eyes lit up once she saw him, this reminded him exactly why he came. She ran up to him and wrapped her arms around him.
"Merry Christmas Plum." Rashad greeted, he pulled away and kissed her blemish free forehead. "Merry Christmas." Sahara replied as she ran to the couch. From the look of things, she'd already opened the gifts from her other family members, Rashad's were the only ones untouched.
"Come on so I can open my presents!" Sahara enthusiastically spoke, causing Rashad to chuckle. "Come on kid." Rashad spoke as he sat on the sofa. Drea sat in the corresponding chair to her living room set. She had a big smile on her face as she grabbed her mug from the table and took a brief sip of its contents.
"What should I open first?" Sahara eagerly questioned, "The world is yours." Rashad replied, Sahara looked at her uncle with a confused expression on her butterscotch face.
"What does that mean?" Sahara questioned, "Open whatever you want." Rashad answered, he noticed Drea took the gifts out the shipping box and individually wrapped them. Sahara went for a small box, which Rashad assumed to be the jewelry he'd bought for her. She removed the wrapping paper, revealing the small orange box. She let out a loud squeal once she took the top off of the box.
"I love it!" She announced, causing Rashad to lightly chuckle. Seeing his niece happy was all it took to make him happy as well, "Let me put it on for you." He spoke, motioning for her to come over to him.
Rashad bought his niece the connected charm hearts bracelet, it was a tad bit big but that gave her enough time to grow into it. He started her off with a few charms since she wouldn't be able to buy or get the charms put in New York. The bracelet could hold a plethora of charms, so he started her collection with 5. The special niece charm, the Croc charm, an initial charm, a Texas charm, and a linked hearts charm.
"How about every time you visit me in Texas, I get you two new charms?" Rashad questioned as he snapped the bracelet on for her, Sahara nodded her head yes while a big smile stretched across her face. "It's beautiful Rashad." Drea chimed in, but Rashad didn't entertain her.
"Alright, go open the other stuff." Rashad instructed, he sat there full of joy watching his niece react to her gifts. For a second it saddened him to know that Rahim was missing out on experiencing moments like this, it was one thing to hear about them but to live them out was another, and he was more than grateful to be able to do so.
December 26th 2022
Manhattan, New York
12:34 am
Amina's heart rate increased as she jumped out of her slumber, she breathlessly sat up to grab her phone. The time read 12:34, which meant she'd only been sleeping for about 30 minutes. Amina sat her phone back on the nightstand before laying back down. Her eyes were dry and cotton mouth was on full effect, but she was too weak to solve either of those problems.
"Amina." Rashad called out, she licked her lips before replying, "Yeah?" She stared at the darkness in front of her, which would normally spook her out but right now she was unfazed.
"You good? You been jumping in your sleep for the past 20 minutes." Rashad spoke, Amina sighed as she turned over so she was now facing him. He slightly sat up and pulled Amina closer so her head could lay on his chest.
"I always have this dream...about the exact day my mama told me she had HIV, I was so young but I remembered the seriousness in her voice and the confusion in my head." Amina explained as she mindlessly toyed with Rashad's chain. "Did—did she pass from having HIV?" Rashad questioned.
Amina shook her head no as tears began to cascade down her face, "She had pneumonia...and her immune system was too weak to fight it." She explained before she bawled into tears. Her heart ached for her mother, she was a young girl who put her trust into the wrong person. It angered Amina, because her mother was so sweet and loving. She never deserved to have the wool pulled over her eyes like that.
Rashad held Amina tighter, he was silent to give her the chance to pour her emotions out. "Kenneth gave her that shit and paid her dust." She cried. She didn't speak about her mother much, because she was one with the fact that she was gone. But it still heart her heart whenever she reflected on how her mother was treated. She recalled reading her mother's journal and seeing her speak on her ostracism from her friend group, the feelings she felt after her diagnosis, telling her family, and also her documenting her body's changes.
After crying for so long, Amina started to grow tired. Her eyes were heavy and her face was stained with tears. Meanwhile, Rashad gently rubbed her shoulder. The room fell silent, but for once, the silence was very comforting.
"Do you think your soul can be familiar with someone?" Rashad questioned, stopping Amina from falling asleep. "Yeah." She replied as she continued to toy with his chain.
"That's how I feel about you." Rashad announced. Amina paused for a second before a faint smile appeared on her face.