Ａｌｌ Ｔｈｉｎｇｓ Ｍｕｓｔ Ｅｎｄ
ᕼOᖇᖇIᗷᒪE ᑎIGᕼTᗰᗩᖇES plague my sleep, just as they have for the past year. I dream of the Fjerdan king who I killed after kidnapping me and threatening my life. I dream of the war between Ravka and Fjerda. I dream of the countless Grisha deaths that have resulted from the rising conflict between us and our enemies. Worst of all, I dream of Amelia getting hurt because of the war-torn world that we threw her into.
I hear a distant voice calling out my name, but I am too wrapped up in my nightmares to listen. There is a hand on my shoulder squeezing lightly. Then, I am pulled from my sleep, jolting up from the mattress.
I breathe heavily as I remember where I am. Aleksander is sitting up beside me, the covers are wrinkled and thrown off my body from tossing and turning.
"It's alright," the Darkling says in a soothing voice, as he says night after night. "It was just a dream." He rubs my shoulder to get me to relax.
Every night, I believe him when he says that everything is fine. Something about tonight was different. Finally, after a year of having these dreams, I say, "No, it's not alright." I hug my knees to my chest and exhale. "This world is house to more turmoil than ever before. Fjerda is even more ruthless with our Grisha now. It's not safe."
"It has never been safe, Alina."
"How comforting." I roll my eyes.
Aleksander scrutinizes me with great intensity, his brain forming infinite calculated responses. Finally, he slips out of bed and holds out his hand for me to take.
I narrow my eyes but take it anyway. He puts a hand on the small of my back and leads me out of the bedroom, padding down the empty corridor, our robes fluttering behind us. The Grand Palace is silent, almost eerie at night. There are no maids or guards navigating the halls this late. I have grown accustomed to the constant bubbling noise.
We stop at the end of the hallway which is where Amelia's bedroom poses. Aleksander quietly swings open her door to reveal a peacefully sleeping child. Her blonde curls are sprawled on the pillow, and small puffs of air leave her lips. Amelia's arm hangs off the bed, the other clutching a stuffed bear.
We both admire the sight. After a minute, Aleksander whispers, "What do you see?"
"I see Amelia sleeping safely in her bed."
He hums. "Exactly. She is safe, in her bed where no one can get her. As long as she is here with us, Amelia will be protected. As will we. That is all that matters: keeping this family safe. Don't worry about what is going on out there. We are here with you, unharmed and happy."
I sigh, relaxing into the Darkling's side as he holds me close.
He is right. Though I am Queen, and it is my responsibility to worry about what happens outside of this palace, the people that I love are truly all that matter. Amelia and Aleksander are safe. Everything is alright.
He rubs my back and kisses me gently. I nod, letting him know I am alright, and we leisurely walk to our chambers. As we saunter back, I glance out of the tall window at the end of the corridor to find snow. It is the first snowfall of the year. The feather-light flakes float down gracefully, and the world looks as if it is encased in a snow globe.
Aleksander suddenly lifts me up and holds me close to his chest. I gasp, then giggle as he carries me the rest of the way to bed. After he sets me down, he crawls into bed beside me and tugs me close. I snuggle my head into the curve of his neck as he cradles the back of my head with his palm, keeping me close.
Now I am certain. Amelia and Aleksander are all I need. The world may be in upheaval, but as long as I have them, I will be just fine.
My eyes fluttered shut, and for the first time in a long while, I am graced with good dreams. Happy dreams. The nightmare of the warring countries is replaced with a playful Amelia running around in the courtyard, Aleksander and I watching her contently.
Everything will be alright.
***
I wake up to Amelia jumping in between Aleksander and I, burying herself under the blankets. I groan and put a hand to my face, rubbing my tired eyes. Aleksander has a similar reaction. Pale morning sunlight streams through the curtains, onto my face.
"Guess what! Guess what! Guess what!" Amelia bounces excitedly on the bed.
"What is it, my Amelia?" Aleksander responds, a bit more awake than I am. I yawn and peel open my eyes.
"Today is the day you promised to take me ice skating! Remember?"
Earlier, I suggested that if Amelia did well with her training this week, we could all go ice skating. "We" meaning I volunteered Aleksander to go with us without telling him, or else he would turn me down, as he does with all things that involve fun. This is the first he is hearing of it.
He displays an unamused face at the both of us. I shrug unapologetically and Amelia beams with a radiant smile.
Aleksander sighs. "Get your kefta."
Amelia squeals in excitement. She jumps off the bed and runs to her room to get dressed for the cold weather.
Aleksander rolls over on top of me and cages me in with his arms on either side. "What am I going to do with you?" he says, smirking as he leans down to kiss me. It is gentle, but passionate as all of our kisses are. Even after a year, the same wanton love burns in both of us. My lips curve up against his, and our noses brush lightly when he leans his forehead on mine.
Amelia comes back with her fur-lined kefta on and makes a gagging noise when she sees us cuddling. "Adults are too old to kiss," she proclaims. I smile and kiss him again, earning another "Eww!" from her.
She runs out, leaving us alone again. I giggle and slip out of bed to change out of my nightgown. Aleksander does the same, replacing his sleepwear with his heavy black kefta.
Once we are dressed, we depart to find Amelia already outside jumping in the snow. There is not a layer on the ground yet, but there will be if it keeps snowing like this. Heavy flakes fall on my lashes and in Aleksander's inky hair. I brush the flakes out of his hair, only for more to appear.
We walk down the stone path connecting the Grand Palace to the Little Palace. When we arrive, we find Grisha of all kinds outside, playing with snowballs, skating, and making forts. I am glad to see they can live normally too. Sometimes, it is hard to be a kid when you are Grisha, caught up in controlling your power, and combat training. It's nice to see them all happy.
Amelia and I put our ice skates on. She doesn't wait and flings herself on the ice, only falling twice before she gains her balance. She glides over to some of her new friends she met at combat training and begins to skate in circles with them. I watch with a smile, then, put my skates on as well. There was a small reservoir in Keramzin, so I was fairly confident on skates. It doesn't take me long to remember how. I glided around in loops, feeling the snowflakes rest on my face and hair.
Aleksander watched us from the bank of the lake, his black hair and kefta standing out like a dark stain against our white surroundings. I glide up to him, stopping along the way to grab something from our pile of belongings. I stop right in front of him. He looks down at me curiously.
"Put these on." I dangled a pair of skates his size in front of his face.
He shook his head, looking uncomfortable.
My brows raise in realization. "In all your years of life, you haven't learned to ice skate?" I lightly tease.
"There are more productive things to fill my time with, so no."
I smile deviously and again wave the skates in front of him. He shakes his head. If he thinks he can get out of it this easily, he isn't as smart as I thought.
I glide even closer to him and lean in, pressing my lips to his ear. I whisper, "If you put them on, then later tonight you'll have a surprise waiting for you."
His eyes flash with fiery lust, then annoyance when he thinks about what he has to do first. Aleksander blows out a breath, which can be seen in the cold, and begrudgingly takes the ice skates. A victory smile forms on my lips.
"That surprise better be good," he grumbles, tying the laces tightly.
Hesitantly, he steps out onto the ice. I hold his hand, which I can tell he doesn't like. He is used to being experienced at everything, so me helping Aleksander hurts his pride.
We take it slow to begin with. He clutches my hand tighter, interlacing our fingers together through knitted gloves. I roll my eyes as he becomes good at it and lets go of me within the first few minutes. It infuriates me how he can be good at everything without trying.
Amelia skates over and reaches for Aleksander. He holds her tiny hand in his and they move together around the lake. When they pass again, Amelia takes my hand too, and we all skate hand in hand for what feels like forever. I never want it to end.
After a while, I notice a man at the edge of the lake watching me. He doesn't have a kefta, just a fur coat, black boots and a heavy dark blue cloak. The lake is not technically on palace grounds, though it is near the palace, therefore, free for all to use, not just Grisha. It is normal for strangers to present themselves and use the lake too. Aleksander has been trying to fight this issue for security reasons, but it is still a work in progress.
The man's eyes are a piercing icy blue. As we make eye contact, he smiles and turns in the other direction. Something about him sends a shiver up my spine. Aleksander sees this too and holds me tighter to him. "I think we should go," he mutters. "Get your things, Amelia."
Her bottom lip protrudes into a pout, but she listens and coasts to the edge to take off her skates and grab her belongings. We do the same.
The walk back is colder than the walk to the lake as the wind picks up. Icy snow swirls around our feet. I soon realize that it is Amelia making the wind stronger. Even with training, sometimes her power gets out of control when she is upset.
I nudge Amelia and put my arm around her. "What's the matter, Amelia?"
"Nothing," she mutters under her breath. The wind picks up more.
Aleksander glances at me, then stops and kneels down to meet Amelia's gaze. "It's the first of many winter days. We will have more chances to go back to the lake. We can even go back next week if you'd like."
Her frown disappears and she nods at him. The wind dies down immediately after. She skips ahead of us toward the Grand Palace. Before joining her, Aleksander and I share a concerned look. Amelia is very powerful. She is more advanced than any of the other Squallers her age. In fact, I've watched her take out a boy double her age and triple her height at training. But when she is emotional, her power is unlike anything I've seen before.
Amelia skips ahead, joyfully unaware of the growing concern regarding her summoning.
"Do you think we should worry about that man by the lake?" I ask anxiously.
Aleksander shakes his head. "He most likely recognized you as the Queen by your kefta. It's nothing to worry about, but it's better to be safe than sorry."
I glance down at my golden stitched black kefta, fancier and more expensively made than all the other Grisha's. "I suppose I do not exactly have the most discreet appearance in the world."
He chuckles and pulls me closer to him. "A queen cannot afford to blend in, let alone the Sun Queen. You are the embodiment of power whether you accept it or not. But power is what keeps us safe."
I huff, knowing he is right. Power is what defeated the Fjerdans. Power is what discourages rebellions, and it keeps us, and more importantly, Amelia, safe.
Even with the reassurance of having power to protect us, I still couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. As we reach the Grand Palace and climb the marble stairs to the entrance, I stop at the top, looking behind me. I feel like someone is watching me. When I scan the courtyard, nothing presents itself.
"Come, my darling Alina," Aleksander urges me inside. I shake off the uneasiness as simply nerves and follow him inside where we can begin our duties as King and Queen.