CHAPTER TEN
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KAZ BREKKER DID NOT BELIEVE in Saints. They preached goodness and humility and most likely judged him for breathing. He believed only in himself—well, mostly.
For Kaz Brekker believed in a Saint. One single Saint, the only one he had ever relied on, the only one he would ever rely on.
She was stained crimson from the blood of her enemies. Plagued by death and chaos. As she faced death she laughed and conned her way out of it, most likely by charming Death itself. She was a rose, beautiful and gentle on the eyes, only when you came closer did you see her thorns, ready to spill blood and make men beg for their flimsy little lives.
Kira was his Saint. Her smile was etched in his soul from the moment he had first seen her face; her hair reminded Kaz of gold itself, and his greed yearned for it. She was everything. And Kaz Brekker needed to keep her at arm's length.
Now that all his questions were answered. Now that he knew why he couldn't refuse her (who could refuse a Saint?), or why he hadn't killed her the moment he saw her sitting at his desk unabashedly. Now that he knew who she was, Kaz couldn't look at her the same way.
He was furious, hurt, she hadn't trusted him but that wasn't the reason for the way he looked at her now. That was his mask of indifference, of coldness. He had to hide the way he only wanted to look. She was a Saint. His Saint and he had to keep that hidden from the prying eyes, lest people wanted to believe in her too.
"So...That went well," he heard Jesper say with a shrug as he neared the bar of the tavern.
Kira let out a laugh from his side, "Well? That was fucking awesome. Much better than my last time around," she said and Kaz could picture her grin even with her back turned to him.
"You shouldn't be cursing in public," the Conductor muttered. Jesper laughed. The Conductor ignored them as he looked down at something in his hands. "The Little Palace winter fete. There's just no way he can find a way to the Sun Summoner without Nina. Especially during this ridiculous party. The place will be crawling with Second Army."
"We're in luck," said Kaz as he neared the bar, leaning over on the counter next to Kira, but far away enough that she couldn't look into his soul. He didn't look at her.
"There's a good chance we can crack on. Now that we're three days' travel from the capital, the next play is finding a way inside the Little Palace." He met Kira's eyes and when Kira looked away, adamant not to use her knowledge to spite him (most likely) he continued. "It turns out the Kribirsk archives house the Little Palace blueprints. But... they're kept under lock and key... Far from the prying eyes of the masses."
Kaz's lips threatened to tug into a smirk and Jesper banged his hand on the table, a grin on his face. "Yes!"
"What does that mean?" asked the oblivious Conductor.
"Time for a heist!" Jesper said excitingly, patting the Conductor on the arm.
"You'll have to say goodbye to Milo," Kira pointed out and Jesper pouted.
"I know..."
"Kaz?"
Kaz's eyes snapped to Kira's face and her hypnotic hazel eyes. His jaw clenched and he tilted his head, urging her to continue.
"Can I talk to you? Privately?" Kira asked, pursing her lips at him. She didn't wait for an answer as she hopped off the stool and went around him, her newest pale purple dress swaying behind her—where she even managed to get it he wouldn't know.
Burying his urge to break something, or preferably someone's skull, he followed after her. Kira walked into a hallway he was certain they weren't supposed to be in. She nodded at a man passing by them with a frown, and smiled, not bothering to explain herself as she opened a door to her left and gestured for Kaz to follow.
Kaz walked into the room, closing the door behind them and his eyebrows furrowed as he found himself in a wine cellar of sorts.
"We can't take too long," he said, "we need to start planning the heist."
He saw Kira nod, not even bothering to roll her eyes like she usually did. "Believe me I don't want to be here anymore than you. But we are here on a job and we have to get the bad blood out of the way for at least now."
Kaz didn't answer, merely leaned against the wall, and looked at Kira expectantly. She took a deep breath and ran a hand through her impossibly golden hair.
"I'm Grisha," she blurted out and Kaz couldn't hide his surprise as his eyebrows raised. He did not expect this to unfold this way. Kira clamped her lips together and nodded. "I hate using that word and calling myself that but it's the truth. And... I trust you with it. I can manipulate metals and such. That's how—"
"You stole the buttons right off my overcoat," Kaz finished emotionless and Kira nodded. "Why are you telling me this?"
It wasn't a big surprise that she was a Fabrikator, Kaz had had some sort of inkling about it since the day she appeared in his office and saw the metal welded into her boots. He was surprised though that she was telling him.
"Because I need you to trust me enough so we can finish this job. I need to prove that I do trust you, Kaz."
"Then why didn't you tell me?"
Kira looked down at the ground, fiddling with the ring on her finger, and then looked up at him again, "Because you were my secret."
"What?"
She took a step closer to him but still stood a couple of feet away from him, and Kaz didn't know why but he wanted her to step even closer, it was as if her presence could silence the ghosts in his ears.
"I got to Ketterdam in Queen's Lady Ship," she began, "I was young and lost and I didn't catch the plague but I guess my morals did. They died fairly early and I began nicking everything valuable enough from the corpses on the streets. When I saw you, looking half dead, I felt this urge inside me to help you, I needed to, for my own sake."
Kira paused for a moment and looked into his eyes as if searching for a sign to stop talking. And though Kaz was gripping his cane for his life as she decided to bring him down memory lane, he made no sign he wanted her to stop.
"You'd be able to survive even if I didn't do anything. I knew that then and I know that now. But I still wanted to help you. I honestly wanted to and I liked that feeling. The honesty you made me feel. That was the day I swore not to lie." She took a small step forward but was still out of reach from him. "You were my secret. I didn't want to share that day with anyone and I guess I thought you felt the same way. Knowing I was there could change everything for you so I kept quiet."
He didn't say anything for a few moments. His gaze swept over her face, the slight frown on her rosy lips and the glint in her hazel always filled with the honesty she always gave him.
How could Kaz say no to his Saint? The one person who helped him without asking for anything in return. The Whisperer was a force to be reckoned with and she could charm anyone into doing her bidding and even though she didn't lie in words she did with every emotion in her eyes.
But Kaz knew how to spot genuine honesty in her face. It was the same look that plagued his dreams when the thoughts of getting vengeance for Jordie and himself weren't on his mind.
"I reckon now it's our secret," said Kaz as he pushed off the wall and opened the door, he made his way out of the room and glanced back at Kira, "Come on, Whisperer, we have a heist to attend to."
She gave him a small smile.
•••
Kaz saw Jesper kiss a goat and say goodbye to it like the goat was his baby (Milo was what he called him). Kaz paid the Conductor to go make friends despite his terrible social skills. But the stupidest thing he had been present for was his role during the heist.
"If you keep grinning like that you'll blow our cover, Whisperer," he snapped at Kira as they walked into the Archive building of Kribirsk.
She had been on the verge of laughing since he had shown himself wearing too much color for his own liking, and a beret on his head.
Kira schooled her face and smoothed down the skirt of her dress. She had managed to get it for a few sovereigns from a barmaid, and Kaz had to admit it wasn't half bad. It was scarlet and had a neckline low enough that her collarbones were on full display, and it dipped in the back though her skin was covered by her hair. Scarlet red looked good on her, she looked deadly, like a poisonous rose.
"I'm sorry, Kaz, but you're a sight to behold," she answered as she bit down a grin.
He didn't answer. But he did glare at her.
They walked into the building and Kaz spotted an annoyed-looking man behind the counter.
"Good day to you, sir," Kaz said cheerily as he approached the counter, Kira beside him. "My name is Ivanovski. The sculptor, yes. This is my assistant," he added and gestured to Kira who batted her eyelashes at the man with a shy smile. Kaz had to fight back a scowl.
"All right," the man said, tearing his gaze away from Kira.
"I am in desperate need of your assistance," said Kaz, "I am working on a real showstopper for the winter fete. I need the dimensions to the Little Palace entrances."
The man looked beyond irritated so it was Kira's cue to try and get him to be more agreeable. "You must be exhausted having people asking you for the blueprints," she said with a sympathetic look and the man turned his gaze to her again and nodded.
"The damned fete. I have to pull the blueprints every day," he said in frustration.
"At least they haven't been stolen," Kira said. Kaz's lips tugged the slightest. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you must scare away anyone who tries," she added shyly and the man blushed.
Kira did know better though because Kaz was sure one whack to the head with his cane would flat-out kill the archivist.
"The grand piece may be too grand to fit through the doorframe," Kaz added, "The King will have my head if his statuary must be parked in the courtyard."
"Wait here," the man said with a sigh, stealing one more glance at Kira who waved a hand at him.
"With bated breath," Kaz muttered before letting the stamp of phosphorus fall on the ground and throwing it under the man's shoe with skill. Once the man was out of earshot Kaz turned to Kira, annoyed. "Do you have to flirt with everyone? I could've managed."
Kira rolled her eyes. "I don't flirt with everyone, Kaz. But he was clearly annoyed and needed someone to ease his mind. I might have just bought us a few more moments with the blueprints."
"Inej will steal them anyway."
"But if it doesn't work then you'll be able to know something other than the nothingness you know now."
"I could know more if you told me."
"I'm not aware of the architecture behind the Little Palace, Kaz."
"But you know something, princess," Kaz said, and Kira scowled at the nickname.
"I know a lot of things, Kaz," she said. "But I don't know how to break into the Little Palace, it's nearly impossible and we could end up impaled on sticks for it."
"Can we choose which stick we want to be impaled on?" Kaz asked raising an eyebrow. "It's only poetic if it's my own cane."
"Or the stick you have up your ass," Kira added with an amused smile and Kaz shrugged fighting the urge to get lost in her eyes.
Just then the archivist came back with the papers in his hand, "Dimensions to the entrances of the Little Palace."
"Ah! May the Sun Summoner bless you," Kaz said with a smile.
"Oh, I'm not a believer."
"No, truth be told," Kaz said, his eyes glancing at Kira, "neither was I."
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