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We have been here in London for a day and we are already preparing to attend a ball. All of the clothing Edmund gave to me at Beaumont are here in my room at Lady Snow's townhome. In addition there are several new ballgowns from the dressmaker that is preparing my wedding dress. One is the most beautiful petrol blue taffeta gown with silver embroidery that I am wearing this evening. It has puffs to the short sleeves and a slight train on the back.
I regret to say that in my hurry to leave London those weeks ago I never even thought of what would happen to poor Rachel. I knew she was being paid by Edmund but by the time I actually considered what would happen to her position after I left, I was already with Lady Snow. But now that I have her back, she has told me that Edmund gave her a short vacation to visit her family and still paid her salary. I suppose that is best because everyone would assume I would take her with me since I was going on a supposed visit to a friend's home. I think Rachel was as excited to see me as I was to see her. She did not ask where I have been or why I left so abruptly without her, thank goodness.
Edmund has come to Lady Snow's townhome to pick us up and escort us to the ball. He has been most attentive over the last days. He gives me a look of adoration when he sees me in my new gown. My heart beats faster as he walks over to take my hands and pull me to stand close in front of him.
"You will be the most beautiful lady at the ball, Lizzy. I knew that color would look most becoming on you. It is a bit of a shame that none of the other ladies will be admired as all the men will be looking at you."
I cannot help but giggle at the ridiculousness of his exaggeration. "Edmund," I admonish him.
He gives me an innocent look. "I only speak the truth, Lizzy." Lady Snow laughs with approval and we are off.
Edmund hands us up into the carriage and again Edmund and I are seated next to one another. His mother is seated next to Lady Snow. She greeted me yesterday like I was her long lost daughter. She refused to let go of my hand and we talked for hours over the wedding plans.
I am so grateful to have her planning the wedding, even if it will never occur. I find I am not overly concerned about the details. Is it my personality or the fact that I don't know if the wedding will actually take place? I think it is my personality because I was not interested in the details even when I was sure I was to marry him.
Lady Snow has proven to be a respected chaperone. Edmund's mother and her seem to be as thick as thieves already. It is not lost on me that Lady Snow has put her reputation on the line by not divulging Edmund and my time alone in her house. I believe she is fond of Edmund. In our discussions she seems to approve of him in every way.
The ball tonight is at William's house and it is in honor of Edmund and I being betrothed. His home being in town, the carriage ride is short and we are among the first to arrive since we are the guests of honor.
We are greeted by William's family as we enter the impressive foyer. I remember this grand house from the card party, months ago. Everyone is so gracious, offering their congratulations. It is particularly good to see William again. "Lord Saville! It is so wonderful to see you!"
"I am sure you cannot possibly be as happy to see me as I am to see you, Miss Cavendish. And please, call me Will now that you are engaged to my best friend."
"Alright, then you must call me Beth in return." He nods in agreement.
We move through the rest of the line. Daniel greets me exuberantly. "There you are! We have missed you so much! You were gone so long on your visit and we were in despair that you would never return!" Edmund squeezes my side a bit at Daniel's words. Daniel cannot know how close to the truth he has it.
William pulls Edmund and me aside at the end of the line as Lady Snow and Edmund's mother converse with Lady Saville. "My mother would like you to join the receiving line tonight if you are willing." I nod and Edmund also agrees. "But first we need to speak in my office, Fred is waiting. Would you like Lady Snow or your mother to accompany us or perhaps someone else?"
Edmund and I both agree that Lady Snow would be best since we are not keeping secrets from her. She readily agrees to join us in William's office. James comes to say hello and after an enthusiastic welcome, he escorts his mother into the ball.
As soon as we get into William's office I see a very remorseful Fred coming right for me. He grabs both my hands and kisses over one of them. "Miss Cavendish. I have longed to see you so I could sincerely apologize to you. Edmund has told me that you overheard my conversation in his foyer with Bradford and I am devastated to have caused you pain."
Edmund had already warned me that he told Fred and William that I know about the wager and that knowing of it pained me greatly. He did not, however, tell them that I tried to break the engagement or that I ran away.
I give Fred a tentative smile, "Thank you for your apology. Do not make yourself uneasy."
Fred shakes his head, "No, do not be so gentle with me. I must bear most of the blame for the whole debacle as it was my idea from the start. It was impetuous and juvenile of me and I own to you that I will be a better man in the future. You are the loveliest, kindest of ladies and I regret with my whole heart that we were critical of you at one moment in your life. I am determined to rein in my immature judgmental side and become someone who I could look up to. Please say you forgive me for not only my thoughtless actions but my words as well."
My smile is more steady now, "Of course I forgive you, Mr. Atbury. Let us forget it ever happened." He thanks me and bows to me again. I can see he is truly contrite.
William steps up next, he takes one of my hands and looks me right in the eyes, "Elizabeth, let me please apologize for my part in our unthinkable game, as well. Although I wasn't directly involved, I did nothing to discourage it and I did talk with them about the wager that evening. I need you to know that I fully regret any part I played in hurting you. I have grown quite attached to you, as a dear friend. To think I had been complicit in a plan that caused you pain is mortifying to me. And although the nature of the wager would seem that we were unimpressed by you, I can honestly say that I felt quite the opposite when I left the ball that night. You intrigued all of us. Will you please accept my wholehearted apology?"
I can genuinely give a smile to William, he has always been kind to me. I remember our dance that first night. He brought me punch and we had a riveting conversation. He was always my champion, taking me to the opera, helping me with archery. I never felt judged by him.
"Of course, it is all forgotten. I will not dwell on our difficult beginnings and rely on your account that you no longer think of me as you did when we first met."
William returns my big smile, "Elizabeth, you have never been anything but engaging and fun. I have always looked forward to seeing you." He leans in conspiratorially even though everyone can hear him. "If you were not already so perfect matched in your engagement, I think I would make a plan to steal you from Edmund and keep you for myself."
Everyone but Edmund laughs at this. My fiancé harrumphs a bit and puts his hand on my waist and pulls me away from William to his side. This makes everyone laugh more. I cannot help but ask, "You think us well-matched then?"
Fred speaks up, "How can we not when you are the first girl to ever hold his interest?"
I narrow my eyes slightly and purse my lips, trying to ascertain if this is the truth or if Edmund's friends are championing his cause. William looks at me with surprise, "You doubt this? You think he has had regard for someone before?"
"No." I shake my head. "No, of course not. I was just remembering a certain red-headed beauty that he seemed quite taken with at one time."
William frowns in a moment of thought, "Miss Dubois?" He looks surprised. "Edmund was never anything but civil to her, was he not?" He looks around at Fred and his eyes settle on Edmund for corroboration. "I thought the regard was always on her part, never on yours."
Edmund nods but doesn't get to speak because Fred jumps in, "Well, I can tell you decisively that Edmund's eyes never followed Regina around wherever she went, like they did with you. He may not have realized his own feelings at the time, but his eyes rarely left you even that first night at Almack's. In fact..."
Edmund pulls me closer to his side then and interrupts, "Alright, I think we have heard enough. You need not give away all my secrets. Some friends you two are." His hand rub enticingly up and down my arm. "Were we not to join the reception line? Lady Saville will be most put out if we make her wait much longer."
William and Fred both look amused by Edmund's reaction. As we turn to leave I realize Lady Snow has been witness to the entire exchange. I had completely forgotten she was there. Her eyes look brightened by our interaction and I am sure she will tell me her thoughts on it all tonight after the ball.
As we leave Will's office, Edmund looks down at me, "Are you well?" I love that he is checking in with me after the apologies.
I nod, "That helped immensely," giving him a real smile. I think my heart is mending.
After spending some time in the reception line, Lady Saville has released us to enjoy the ball. The Saville's have an impressive ballroom and I have already had many requests to dance. I suppose that is what happens when you are one of the guests of honor. I had already reunited with Bea yesterday, she and Aunt Tufton came to visit at Lady Snow's. I know my aunt understands that I did not know Lady Snow previously, but to her credit she hasn't publicly questioned the relationship. I was able to thank Bea for her help when I was so distraught and I am sure at some point she will need to know the whole story. She has proved to keep a secret quite well and I am grateful to her.
Edmund is dancing with her now. He is generous to do it because he said he did not want to leave my side at all tonight. But after my third dance he realized he would be away from me anyway and he requested Bea to dance and I know it made her happy. After dancing with both Fred and William, I am now dancing my second dance with James. He insisted that he gets special treatment as my future brother and it is hard to deny James anything when there is no doubt he will throw a fit if he doesn't get his way.
James spent the first dance determined to give away all of Edmund's secrets. But I have come to realize now that the worst secrets he has shared are times Edmund played pranks on him as a child. I have been dutifully consoling to James over the 'terrible hardships' Edmund put him through as a boy. And when I inquired if he was ever able to get payback for the 'atrocities' of Edmund putting frogs in his bed or filling his shoes with mud, James readily spend the entire second dance telling me of the pranks he pulled on his older brother.
When the song ends, James escorts me back to Edmund's side and I see that Edmund has a cup of lemonade for me which I gratefully take. I know that my cheeks are pink after laughing and dancing with James for so long. "Well, James has just given away all your secrets to me. I now know that you and he played an infinite number of pranks on each other as children."
Edmund smiles down at me and I cannot mistake the love in his eyes. James protests at my summarization, "Beth! Surely you see that Edmund was much harder on me than I ever was on him!" He has feigned outrage that I could think them equally culpable.
I can't help but giggle, "James, you admitted to filling Edmund's desk with soot and cutting the toes out of his socks and glueing his textbook pages together so he couldn't study for an exam."
James looks slightly sheepish. "It is not my fault if you were able to get more out of me that I should have admitted. You seemed charmed by the stories which made me want to tell you more."
I touch Edmund's arm as I say, "Oh, I was charmed. I just hope that our children have more reserve than to torture each other endlessly."
When I look up at Edmund there is a possessive look in his face and I instantly realize why. I have just referred to our children. Which means I am leaning toward marrying him. So what if I am? I smile back up into his eyes. It is a lovely thought, that we would have children together.
I am taken out of my imaginings when I see a familiar face join us. I instantly feel Edmund draw me closer. I need the new guest to know I have no ill feelings toward him.
"Mr. Wimple, it is lovely to see you again. Pray, how have you been?" Edmund's hand leaves my side to rub up and down my back then rests it on the back of my neck possessively.
Mr. Wimple's eyes rise to mine with longing and I hear Edmund clear his throat. He does not like the look Stephen is giving me. "It is good to see you again, Elizabeth. I've missed..."
Edmund's barely-there smile drops. Stephen should not be using so familiar a name, considering that I gave him permission to use it when I thought he was proposing. Edmund interrupts, "I hope you have a nice evening, Mr. Wimple. If everyone would excuse us, I see someone I need to introduce my fiancée to." With a hand at my back, I am whisked away to be introduced to his friend Bradford. The one who was away for years traveling.
I am not sure Edmund has been told the unkind things Bradford said about me. But I suppose he should be forgiven considering he never met me. Although, there is something to be said for giving the benefit of the doubt to people even though you have never met them.
Bradford Stack is quite handsome. He has light colored hair and eyes. But there is something rakish about him in his manner. "Ah, so this is the infamous fiancée." Edmund frowns a bit at his friend's greeting. When he sees Edmund's reaction he adds, "Your beauty and good humor have been much talked of." Edmund's face relaxes. Bradford looks at me, "Is there anyway I could entice you to dance with me, Miss Cavendish? I am curious to better know the girl who stole my friend's heart so completely."
Edmund almost squeezes me tighter, I think he does not want to give me up again. But in the end he lets go of his hold so that I can dance with his friend.
After making a few cursory comments about the dance and attendees in general, Bradford looks down and me a laughs a little, "You are not at all what I expected."
He gives no indication if it is for the good or bad so he leaves me to inquire, "With a comment like that, you cannot help but know I would ask what you expected of me." I know I raise my eyebrow a bit with the question.
He chuckles, "Well, I will only say that now that I have met you, I am no longer wondering how you were able to get an Earl to propose to you."
He is clearly referencing the rumors that I trapped Edmund into marrying me. But it is not lost on me that he has not indicated if he has found confirmation of the gossip in meeting me or if he has refuted the rumors. He only looks amused by me and our conversation.
"Your comments are so cryptic, Mr. Stack, that I might need the rosetta stone to decipher them. But perhaps in society we make too much of first impressions, anyway. I would be much more comfortable if you were to make judgements on my character after knowing me for more than ten minutes." I get the same feeling I got when hitting the archery target at Beaumont.
His eyebrows go up in surprise at my comeback. It is possible he thought I was dull and wasn't expecting I would have equal footing in this conversation. After regaining his composure his eyes get a little fire to them, "I apologize for speaking in riddles, I only meant to compliment you, Miss Cavendish. I can see that Edmund has landed himself quite the catch. You are very beautiful, although a little sassy. I have no doubt you were much sought after before your engagement."
I pull my lips into my mouth for a moment and think carefully before speaking, "Well, I can tell you truthfully that when I spend time in some men's company, I too am grateful to... how did you put it?... have 'landed quite the catch'. Edmund has always treated me as an equal, appreciating my personality and intelligence, in addition to my looks and apparent sassiness."
Bradford has been pulling me ever closer to him and I had not noticed in my annoyance with his rude conversation. But I definitely notice now that we are too close. I think he is as much a rake as I suspected. I purposefully give him a harsh stomp on his foot and can see with the increasing redness in his face that I have injured him admirably.
I pull back from him, "How clumsy of me to have trod on your foot, Mr. Stack. My deepest apologies." I have no doubt there is a sparkle to my eye and he catches my meaning when I add, "And I was SO enjoying our conversation." Even though the dance has not ended, I turn and make my way to Edmund.
My fiancé instantly pulls me to his side. But after confronting his friend on the dance floor, I am not at all prepared for who is in this group talking with him. It is Lord and Lady Sanderson, and their unmistakeable red-haired niece. I try to relax after my dance floor fight to greet them properly. Regina's eyes shoot daggers at me but her aunt and uncle have nothing but felicitations to offer.
After the pleasantries have been issued, Regina uses a sweet voice to ask, "Miss Cavendish, would you care to take a stroll around the room with me? We could reacquaint ourselves with old friends."
I cannot find my voice, bad memories of my private conversations with Regina come tumbling back into my head. But thankfully, Edmund has no problem with it, "Actually, I have been too much away from my fiancée this evening. I insist upon her staying by my side for the rest of the night. I simply cannot do without her." I look up at Edmund gratefully, he looks back adoringly and I hear Regina huff.
She is not done. "Well, I have not yet heard the account of how you went from insisting that Edmund was not a potential suitor to now being engaged to him." Her aunt and uncle give their niece a frown at her inappropriate statement.
Again, Edmund answers, "I can clear up that mystery for you, Miss Dubois. Elizabeth may not have initially considered me a potential suitor because we were such good friends. But with my continued pursuit of her, she finally gave in and agreed to be my wife. In fact, I think you were there when she made me the happiest man on earth. Oh, and my mother fainted from overwhelming joy. Goodness that was quite a night, wasn't it?" I have repeatedly heard Edmund's mother praising me to whoever would listen tonight. No one would suspect that she fainted from anything other than happiness and excitement.
Regina looks positively livid at Edmund's account of what happened. "Well, that isn't how I've heard that evening described. Some are saying..."
Edmund cuts her off, "Oh yes! I know what you are referring to. It seems there are some ignorant embittered people in society that are choosing to rewrite a false rendition that is more to their pathetic taste. We try to ignore such imbecilic, uninformed accounts of my proposal. I am sure you ignore those stories as well, Miss Dubois, considering that you were there to witness the very happy event."
I realize that I love this man with all my heart. I would be so stupid not to marry him. My head has caught up with my heart tonight. My heart that was always true and never traitorous. Everything about me wants to be with this man forever. I'm sure overwhelming love is shining in my eyes and he looks down at me so adoringly. He doesn't even look at the Sandersons or Regina as he begs them to excuse us to go dance.
I hear Lady Sanderson say as we are leaving, "Well, anyone having seeing them together cannot deny how in love with each other they are. It would be almost scandalous if this ball weren't specifically celebrating their betrothal."
Edmund takes me in his arms for our dance. "No more dances with other men, Lizzy. I cannot possibly hold myself back from giving the next man who touches you a black eye. I was doing fairly good with William and James. Daniel was pushing it a bit. But I nearly marched across the dance floor to level Bradford to the ground when he was holding you overly close." His brooding eyes tell me how upset he was, but then he smiles a bit. "But when you permanently damaged his foot and left him hobbling away from the dance floor, I was much relieved. So tell me Lizzy, do I get to beat him to a bloody pulp tonight or should I wait until tomorrow?"
I bring my hand up to his cheek, "I would prefer that instead of beating him up, we not see him overmuch."
Edmund nods, "We will never invite him to Beaumont, and you will never again dance with anyone but me." I raise my eyebrow at him and say his name in an admonishing tone. "What? I am being generous by still allowing men to gaze upon you. They may look but not touch." A warm feeling enters my chest, he is possessive of me.
---
Last night when Edmund escorted me and Lady Snow home from the ball, I wanted to tell him my new decision. But I thought I should do it in private. This morning he has come to visit and Lady Snow very conveniently has a headache and needs to lie down for a bit. She insists that we talk of our wedding plans in her den, but asks that we keep the door closed because the draft that comes through rearranges the papers on the desk and it is most inconvenient to her.
With the door to the den shut and locked, Edmund pulls me down onto his lap and I barely fight him on it. He cups my cheek in his hand. "Lizzy."
"Edmund." I whisper it in the exact same tone to tease him.
He smiles at this and kisses my cheek and gives me an intense look, "Say you forgive me, Lizzy. Say we are engaged and you will marry me." I look up into his beautiful blue eyes. "Please, I will do anything, say you are mine, Lizzy."
I let out a breath and relax against him in his embrace. "Edmund, I loved you nearly from the start." His smile of relief shows how much he wanted to hear me say those words. "I fell in love with you because you are kind and funny and handsome."
Awe enters his eyes as he says, "Say it again, Lizzy." He brushes the hair off my cheek and keeps his hand resting there, "Please say it again."
"I love you, Edmund." He sighs almost with relief.
"I love you too, Lizzy. So much." His eyes are bright as he looks down at me. "We will have such fun together, sweetheart." His eyes are begging me. "Tell me Lizzy, tell me you will be my wife." He lowers his head and hovers his lips over mine. It is difficult to think or breathe when he is this close.
"Yes, Edmu...." My sentence is cut off by his lips crashing down on mine, suckling at them like they are needed to keep him alive. He is so gentle, yet so very hungry. His tongue is tasting me and the feeling of it is overwhelmingly delicious.
My hands grip his shoulders and my tongue joins in, I want my taste of him also. He growls as our tongues touch and somehow I am pulled closer to him, his kisses becoming even more demanding. His hands rub up and down my back, lingering where my seat rests on his lap and he groans again he suckles at my lower lip.
He pulls his lips back from our kiss, breathing hard. He rests his forehead on mine, and I whimper in protest. I wasn't nearly done kissing on him. My voice comes out raspy, "Edmund please..."
He chuckles lowly, "I'm sorry I have to stop Lizzy, you have no idea where my mind is headed when I kiss you. They are the least wholesome thoughts I have had in my lifetime." My eyes open wide in surprise at his admission. I look up into his sparkling eyes and I see arousal as he tries to calm down. "One more minute and I would have had you under me on that divan." I blush at his words.
It takes him a few minutes to calm and he is finally able to pull his head away from mine. "Lizzy, you have made me the happiest man ever. I cannot tell you how excited I am for our life at Beaumont. I feel as if I have found a true partner in life. I love you so much, darling. It is honestly like a fairy tale happy ending."
I am reminded of a conversation I had with Lady Snow after the ball last night. "Edmund, Lady Snow has asked for our permission to write a book about us. She wants to write the story about how we met and fell in love. She told me that if I decided to marry you, she would write the story exactly as it happened. Of course she will change our names and titles. She even plans to try to get it published."
Edmund frowns at me, "A book about us?"
I'm nodding, "She says our love story should be shared with others and everyone will want to read it." I look at him warily, "What do you think of it?"
His eyebrows come up, "I am fine with it, if you are."
I smile back, "I don't mind, I kind of like the idea. And it would certainly make me feel better since I will be leaving her without a companion."
Edmund chuckles, "A story about a devastatingly handsome, vibrant young man who falls in love with a beautiful, intelligent young maiden. It is bound to be a best seller! We will be famous and no one will know it is us."
I cannot help but laugh at his description. "Devastatingly handsome, huh?"
"Oh yes, most assuredly. I will have to be sure that she knows of my musical talent and my horse riding skills. I am also quite an estate manager. I can tell her about new ways I have found to turn a profit at Beaumont. And I am so personable!" I can tell he is teasing now by the twinkle in his eye. "I will be the most heroic protagonist a book has ever had!"
I giggle and his eyes devour my face. He leans over to give me a long, deep kiss on the lips. I love this look of relaxed happiness on him. He makes me feel so loved and cared for, he deserves to have contentment and joy as well. I am going to try to be the best wife I can.
He gets a twinkle in his eye, "In the book, do you think she could be persuaded to make me a duke?" His eyebrows go up with expectation.
I cannot help but giggle again, "Edmund!"
A/N: Thank you so much for reading Toast of the Season! I appreciate every vote and comment and am so thankful for all your encouragement! This book was such a departure from my BTS fanfiction and I thoroughly enjoyed writing it! I am still new to writing even though I've written three books now. I have only been writing for one year and five months so I have lots to learn! Right now this book has around 16,400 reads and 1058 votes. I currently have 204 followers. There will be an Epilogue but this was the last chapter.