Chapter 26
I didn't know how to bring up with Zion iyong pagsagot nung babae sa phone niya. I didn't even know why the girl had to answer Zion's phone. She could've just let the call drop. Bakit kailangan niya pang sagutin at sabihin sa akin na bumalik lang si Zion sa kwarto para may kunin? She was definitely trying to insinuate something and I hated that she's winning because I couldn't get it off my mind.
"Can I lie down? I'm sorry I'm so tired," sabi ni Zion sa akin pagbukas ko ng pinto. Pinanood ko hanggang sa makarating siya roon sa may carpet at mahiga. His eyes were closed. He looked so tired, yet still so beautiful.
Maybe I shouldn't bring up the Instagram thing. Pagod na siya sa work tapos iyon pa ang sasabihin ko sa kanya. Parang sa isang buwan naming ginagawa 'to, wala pang isang linggo ang lumipas na walang naging issue.
Nikki did say that we'll struggle a lot... but was it supposed to be this hard? May nabasa kasi ako na kapag puro struggle and uncertainties, it's the universe telling you that it's not meant to be. Kasi kapag para sa 'yo daw, it should feel like... like home.
Ewan ko.
Nag-ooverthink na naman ako for sure.
"Do you want pasta for dinner?" I asked.
"It's fine," he replied habang nakapikit pa rin. "I'm fine with whatever you wanna order."
"I was thinking of cooking."
Dumilat ang mga mata niya. "Really?"
I nodded. "Yeah... Have you tried Filipino style spaghetti?"
Umiling siya. "Not really. Is it different?"
"It's sweeter," I said. "Wait, have you never tried Jollibee?"
Umiling ulit siya. "Not yet, but I heard about it a lot."
I faked a gasp. "But you've been here for how many months already!"
Natawa siya. "I know, but I did tell you that I'm trying to follow a diet, right? Need to gain muscle and stuff," he said.
"Cheat day?"
"Fine... We'll go to Jollibee on my cheat day," he said. "But you'll still cook spaghetti?"
I nodded. "Yup," I replied tapos kumunot ang noo ko nang maupo siya. "Where are you going?"
"Helping you," he said.
"No, it's fine. I can do it. You rest. You look tired," I told him because he did look tired. Hindi ko na itatanong pa kung bakit dahil alam ko naman na for sure uminom siya kasama iyong mga katrabaho niya. And if itanong ko 'yon, for sure magagawa kong maisingit—consciously or unconsciously—iyong babaeng nagcomment sa IG niya at sumagot sa phone niya.
So, no.
I didn't want to be the paranoid and overbearing girlfriend.
Ni hindi pa nga ako girlfriend!
"No, I wanna help," he said.
"You sure?"
He nodded. "Yeah. You know like how you and Fabian used to cook before."
Napatingin ako sa kanya at napakunot ang noo. "What?" I asked because that was so random. He just shrugged and tried to look nonchalant. Natawa ako. "Are you jealous of him?"
Umirap lang siya.
I laughed harder.
"You're being ridiculous," I said as I walked to the kitchen. Kinuha ko iyong chopping board at saka kutsilyo at inilagay iyon sa counter. Nakasunod lang sa akin si Zion.
"I'm not," he replied. "Have you seen how the guy looks?"
I laughed. "Yeah, I know, but have you seen how you look?" I asked while staring directly into his eyes. Kitang kita ko iyong pamumula ng pisngi niya. Lumakas iyong tawa ko. It's so easy to make this guy blush! Minsan kapag naguusap kami tungkol sa random na bagay, I'd stop and tell him that he's cute. That does the trick. Kita mo na pati iyong tenga niya ay mamumula.
"Shut up," he said.
"Never," I replied, sticking my tongue out. "You look great, okay? Whenever you doubt that, stare at the mirror and see how right I am."
I saw him wrinkling his nose. Natawa ako. He really could be cute at times.
"Whatever," he said. "I just really need to be consistent with the gym," he continued. "Do you really not want to go together?"
"I told you once my contract with my gym ends, I'll go with you," sabi ko sa kanya kasi nasa Kapitolyo iyong gym ko tapos nasa SM Megamall iyong sa kanya. Hindi naman ako nagtatae ng pera. Besides, mas preferred ko pa rin iyong sa Kapitolyo. Mas konti iyong tao. Less pressure.
"Okay," he said. "What can I do?"
"Just chop the onions and garlic," I told him.
"Yes, ma'am," he replied and did that little roger thing. Pota ang cute naman.
Zion and I cooked while some French song was playing on the background. Siya kasi iyong nagpatugtog. Surprisingly, the man has good taste in music kaso nga lang hindi ko maintindihan iyong lyrics. But it's fine—worth it naman marinig siya kumakanta in French.
Why is the French language hot for no reason?!
I thought it'd be a bit weird and awkward dahil hindi kami masyadong nagusap habang nagluluto. I was wrong. It was... comfortable. And it felt nice. I was starting to think na puro chaos lang ang mararanasan ko rito sa kung anuman ang meron kami. Nikki said that we're still learning, but thankfully, may natututunan naman na kami. I didn't wanna fight for this every single day. It's gonna get exhausting at one point.
"That looks good," Zion said as I was almost done cooking the sauce. I realized na mas gusto ko iyong spaghetti kapag nilagyan ng Nestle cream at saka maraming cheese. It's just better that way for me.
"I hope it tastes good," I replied.
"I'm sure it does," he said and then he gave me a thumbs up and a goofy smile.
Ako iyong naglagay ng food sa plato habang binubuksan naman ni Zion iyong wine na binigay sa akin nung isang client ko. I didn't have wine glass because I wasn't a huge wine drinker, so sa mug kami uminom. But Zion seems to be a fan of wine. Maybe I should buy a wine glass.
"Why is your face like that?" he asked as he was beginning to eat.
"Just tell me if it's not good."
Tumawa siya. "You're being silly," he said and then took a spoonful. I was watching his reaction. He looked at me and acted like he was gagging. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko tapos bigla siyang tumawa. "You're so serious," he continued. "The food's wonderful."
Hinampas ko siya. "You asshole."
He laughed again. "You're worrying about nothing," he said. "Food is food. When I was younger, a day will pass when I'll only eat a bread and cheese. You worry too much. I'm not choosy. Not at all."
I bit my lower lip. I wanted to comfort him, but I knew that he didn't want to make a bigger deal out of it. But I was glad na medyo comfortable na siya na sabihin 'to sa akin. Sana dumating iyong araw na mapagusapan talaga namin. Para kasing ang daming unresolved trauma na nangyari sa kanya na nagmamanifest hanggang ngayon.
"How was your work?" I asked.
We just finished washing the dishes—well, he washed the dishes. I told him we could just leave it there, but he said that he'll wash the dishes already. Ewan ko. Minsan kapag may ginagawa ko, iniisip ko na dahil ba 'to sa childhood niya? Kaya ang hirap din magka-anak, e. Kasi alam mo na kung paano mo man papalakihin iyong anak mo, may lasting effect 'yan hanggang pagtanda nila. Malaking responsibility talaga.
"It was good," he said.
"That's nice."
"Met some people."
"You made friends?" I asked as casually as I could. Nakaupo kami sa carpet at naka-diretso ang mga binti habang iyong likod namin ay nakasandal doon sa may paanan ng couch. We were both holding our wine-filled mugs.
"Too early to call them friends," he said. "But yeah, I do hope so."
"That's nice."
"Yeah..." he replied. "Need to network and stuff."
"Really?"
He nodded. "Yeah, I mean, having an agency is good, but still it doesn't hurt to know, people, you know?"
"I guess so," I replied. "That's probably why Nikki's always partying."
Natawa siya. "Probably."
"You do party a lot, though!"
"Not really," he said. "Most of the times I'm there just for a few minutes then I'd head out."
"Same," I replied. "But most times, it depends on the company. Or how drunk you are."
"Indeed," he said. "Sometimes, I think about how easier life would be if I were more outgoing," he continued. "Like Fabian, you know? That guy can make friends anywhere. It's bizarre."
"You do talk about Fabian a lot."
Natawa siya. "I do, don't I?" he asked. I nodded. "Is that a bad thing?"
"Not really?"
"Well, someone told me before that if you see someone whose life you wanna have, instead of being jealous about it, just start doing what that other person is doing. Kind of a motivation, if you will."
"So, you wanna have his life?" I asked.
He shrugged. "Not exactly, but he was raised in a good family, he's nice, and he's successful. I mean, what's not to want, right?" he said. "Even you did like him at one point."
I slightly nodded my head.
"Do I sound creepy?"
"No, not really," I said.
"I just want to be successful."
"You will be."
He looked at me. His face looked flushed from the wine. "You think so?"
I nodded. "I know so," I replied, not breaking the eye contact between us. He was looking at me intently that I started to hear the own beating of my heart.
Was he gonna kiss me?
God, yes, please.
This friend thing was killing me although I knew that this was good for us.
But then he stood up.
"I better leave," he said. "I still have to meet Camille tomorrow."
Agad na kumunot ang noo ko. "Who?"
"Some girl from work," he replied. "Thanks for the food."
"You're welcome," I said. "You're gonna see her tomorrow?"
He nodded as he began to walk towards the door to get his shoes. "Yeah. She said she'll introduce me to some people," he said. "I think Nikki knows her," he continued. Of course Nikki knows her. She's the one who told me about this Camille na mahilig sa mga lalaki na may girlfriend na kasi apparently, they're more challenging! I mean, if gusto mo ng challenge, maybe maglaro ka ng online game at tigilan mo iyong relasyon ng mga tao?!
"Oh. You're gonna party again tomorrow?"
He shrugged. "Apparently. I won't be drinking much, though. Just a bottle, I think."
I nodded.
Hindi naman ako girlfriend. Wala akong karapatan na sabihin sa kanya na isama ako or what? Ayoko rin naman maging creepy na biglang lumitaw sa kung saan man siya pupunta. If I ask Nikki, for sure alam niya kung saan mang party 'to.
"I'm glad I met you," he said.
"Thank you... but why?" I asked.
"Because you understand me," he replied. "Tough to find people who can understand you and support you," he continued. "So, I'm happy I found you."
I just smiled and nodded and all my questions vanished because I needed to just be supportive. I really hope that Nikki's right—that a cheater will find a way to cheat kahit pa alam mo lahat ng password sa accounts niya. And that hopefully, Zion's not like that.
**
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