The amount of blood Cleo had lost was startling. It struck Shuri as she watched the others begin to clean up the surgical suite. They'd lowered her body temperature dramatically to slow the flow of blood and she'd found the rupture in order to repair it. There was no reason for it to have happened; spontaneous placental abruption occurred rarely. It broke the Princess's heart that her friend never seemed to get the completely easy road.
She was in critical condition, but she was stable. It was at the point she knew that for certain that she went to the original room and found James laying in a chair with baby Grant on his chest. Gently, she knocked and waited for the man to look in her direction before she stepped in. "I brought him something to eat. Just a little something to tide him over."
James looked at Shuri, his eyes tired. "He's been wiggly for a while now," he told her. "And I think he's wet but... I don't know how to change him."
"I'll show you," she assured him, walking further into the room. In the corner of the room was a small table they could use as a changing area, and she gestured for James to bring Grant over to the table. "He has your blue eyes for now, we'll have to see if that changes," she observed sweetly.
He stood carefully and reluctantly handed the tiny baby to Shuri. "He's beautiful."
She smiled down at Grant as she gently rested him on the table and began to show James how to change a diaper. "Cleo is going to be okay," she shared gently as she carefully took her time to ensure he could see her work.
"Really?" he asked, his voice just a whisper. "You mean that?"
She nodded, glancing in his direction with her own tired eyes. "She's lost a lot of blood, and she just had major surgery... she'll be weak and bedridden for a while, but she should still be able to hold Grant and feed him in just a little while." She knew her friend would be upset about how her son came into the world, but that she would be happy he was safe and healthy.
James let out a long breath, his shoulders relaxing in relief. "Thank you... for saving their lives. I owe you everything."
Shuri gently finished changing Grant's diaper before she carefully picked him up, cradling him in her arms before handing him back over to his father. "Come to Cleo's recovery room with me. You can be with her."
"O-okay." James followed Shuri once she picked up the small bottle she'd brought with her. "Are you sure it'll be okay?"
"Cleo will want you there with her. She'll want Grant close," Shuri tried to assure the nervous new father. "We laid him on her, but she wasn't conscious. When she wakes up, she'll get to meet him." The Princess led him down the hall to a more intensive recovery room and the door opened as they arrived. Inside, Cleo lay asleep in her bed, bags of blood being transfused into her body. Her color was better now, she wasn't quite as pale as she had been.
"You spoke to Steve?" she asked as she went to Cleo's side to check on her vitals.
"Yeah... he's coming home. He's not giving Sam the option to say no."
"Good," she said, knowing Cleo would be relieved that Steve was coming home as well. Once she was sure Cleo's vital signs were stable, she turned and moved a reclining chair from the corner of the room to the side of her bed. "You can sit here," she said, gesturing for him to come and sit. "I'll set you up with the bottle then give you three some space."
James carefully sat in the chair and cuddled Grant to his chest. "He's so small."
"You're very big," she pointed out with an easy smile. "He's a good weight - seven pounds. But I'm sure he feels like nothing to you." Leaning in, she helped James to settle Grant into his arm before she handed out the bottle for him to take. "He's probably hungry."
"Do I just... offer the nipple?" He asked.
"Mm hm. He'll turn his head to find it," she coached patiently, crouching down beside him. She gently guided his hand as he held the bottle and they watched as Grant rooted around and found the bottle, a little noise escaping him as he took it into his mouth to eat.
James melted. "He's so precious," he whispered. "I was so scared to be a father... now..."
Shuri smiled warmly. "Now he's here and you love him more than you thought you ever could," she said, completing his sentiment. "You'll be a wonderful father, James."
"Thank you, Shuri." James bent down and kissed the top of Grant's tiny head. "I'd fight the world for him."
"Hopefully, you won't have to," she replied earnestly, reaching out to gently stroke her finger along Grant's small arm. "I'll leave you all to have some time together. Call me if you need anything," she shared. "Cleo will probably be waking up in a little while. I'll be sure to send Steve when he arrives."
James nodded and yawned. The stress of the night was slowly getting to him. "Thank you, again."
"Get some rest, everyone," she said quietly before she pushed herself back to standing. Before she left, she pulled a blanket out of a drawer and rested it where James could reach it.
It was more than an hour before Cleo began to stir, her eyes slowly flickering open. It took her a few seconds to recognize where she was; the sounds from her monitors clued her in, and she turned her head to take in the sight of the transfusion machine. Blood. She must have lost a bunch of it. "Wh..." she murmured to herself, looking down to find her belly, once round, was now mostly flat beneath the blankets.
"J-James..." she tried to speak, eyes searching the room before she spotted him beside her, and her heart swelled as she spotted him. Sleeping in the chair was James with their son asleep on his chest.
He hasn't meant to fall asleep, but once he burped Grant and checked his diaper, he felt secure enough to sleep while Grant slept on his chest.
Cleo reached out and lightly rested her hand on James's arm. "James," she tried to rouse, her fingertips cold from the loss of blood.
Hearing her voice, James' eyes fluttered open. He was instantly alert at seeing Cleo awake. "Cleo..."
She offered him what of a smile she could and gestured towards the small baby in his arms. "Is that... Grant?" she asked, knowing logically that it was but she hadn't been awake for his arrival.
James stood and smiled before crouching so she could see him. "He's perfect."
Her expression melted into a puddle of tears as she took in her son's peaceful face. She took a moment then to take herself in, grateful that she'd been rested at a slight angle. She didn't try to sit up any further, she knew better than to try that for a while but reached out carefully. "Can I hold him? Please?"
"Of course." James carefully moved Grant to rest him on her chest, still in just his diaper.
Cleo's smile widened as she took her son onto her chest and quiet tears streamed down her face. She pressed gentle kisses to the top of his head before she rested her cheek lightly against it as her hands cradled him. "Hi, baby boy," she murmured, her voice thick with emotion. "We love you..."
"Yes, we do," James agreed softly. He watched Cleo interact with the little baby, tears in his eyes again.
"I love him so much," she said, her voice just barely above a whisper. "I'm so glad he got here safely. I was so scared...". She pressed another few kisses against the top of Grant's head. A thought entered her mind then and she looked back up at James. "Steve... does Steve know everything is okay?"
"Steve stayed on the phone. He got to see his face," he replied. "He's coming home."
Cleo felt relieved that Steve was on the phone with James through Grant's birth. God, she didn't want James to have been alone during that. She could only imagine what it must have been like for him, how afraid he must have been. "Are you okay?" she asked him tenderly, looking for his eyes to give her the real answer.
James bent down to kiss her softly. "I am now."
"I'm sorry you were alone," she apologized quietly, her voice rumbling in her chest. Grant wriggled a little in his position and it tugged another smile onto her lips. "I know you were afraid... I was too."
"It's in the past," James said softly, watching as Grant naturally began rooting against his mom, looking for her breast. "I had Steve, until Sam came into the room he was in. Now we focus on your recovery and being here for Grant."
As Grant began to root, Cleo carefully moved him lower on her chest and she helped him find her nipple. "Whoa," she said with surprise. "That feels so weird... and so cool."
James chuckled softly as he rubbed the back of Grant's head. "He takes a bottle okay," he said softly. "But I imagine that he'll like what you have quite a bit more."
"Well, it's good he can take one, just in case," she replied, her eyes focused in awe on Grant as he suckled so naturally. "So maybe sometimes I can get a little sleep."
"I'll help you as much as I can," James assured. "I know Steve will too." He leaned over and kissed her temple.
"Steve will what?" a familiar voice spoke as the door to the room opened and in stepped a tired but smiling Steve Rogers.
Cleo's face lit up. "Steve," she greeted as excitedly as she could.
"Hi everybody, I missed you," he said, stepping further into the room before he made a line for Bucky to bring him into a hug.
James turned and wrapped Steve in a tight hug. "How did you get here so fast?" He whispered.
"I had incentive and I'm friends with some of the right people," he answered. Wakandan technology could move faster than anyone else's and he had a damn good reason to want to get to Wakanda fast. The royal family felt it was important for him to be here. "And I really wanted to get here."
"We love having you home." James turned and kissed Steve's cheek. "She wants to see you."
"Yes, she does," Cleo agreed, reaching out with her free hand for Steve as she cradled Grant with her other arm.
Steve smiled as he gently wrapped one arm around her shoulders and kissed her temple. "I'm so glad you're both okay."
Cleo leaned into Steve as she looked down at Grant as he ate. "Once he's done eating you can hold him," she said, turning to glance up at Steve. "And get practice changing diapers. I'm not sure I'll be changing one of those for a few weeks while I heal."
"I'll be here as much as possible for you," Steve assured. He looked down at the tiny baby and gently ran his finger along his cheek. "He's adorable."
"Thank you... he looks like his daddy," she cooed, letting her head fall to the side and rest on Steve's chest. "Don't you think?"
"He does," Steve agreed. "But I see you in him too." He gently ran one hand through her hair, soothing her.
She felt Grant loosen his grip and he began to fuss. "Shh," she hushed gently, rocking him for just a moment before she gestured for Steve to take him. "Burp him gently."
Steve faltered for a moment only for James to gently pick Grant up and hand him to him, placing a cloth on his shoulder. He patted his butt until Grant belched, making him smile. "He's so perfect."
Cleo laughed as he burped. "Even his burps are perfect," she agreed. "He'll be treated like a little King around here. Look out, T'Challa."
James watched as Steve snuggled Grant to his chest, kissing his tiny head. "I'm sure everyone will want to meet him."
"They can meet him when he's a little older," Cleo replied. "Right now, he's just ours." They could decide when to bring him into the public. Wakanda would surely embrace him.
Steve carefully sat in the recliner by the bed and slowly rocked back and forth. "This little man is... I don't have words."
"I remember how nervous I was when I found out I was pregnant," Cleo mused as she watched Steve with Grant. "I thought it could ruin everything. Now look..."
"He could never ruin everything," James countered. "I'm sure he'll stress us, but we'll be okay."
She laughed softly. "He'll push us, I'm sure of it. But we just have to remember that we all love each other and that's stronger than anything," she replied sweetly.
"We've been through worse," Steve reminded them, smiling up at the two.
James chuckled and nodded. "Yes, we have."
~~~~~~
Maybe at one point they'd been through something worse, but on little sleep everything felt so much harder. Cleo had stayed in the hospital in the palace for five days before Shuri agreed that she was well enough to go home. She couldn't lift anything heavy or do any major activity, but she could be at home and the family could start to settle into their lives.
Now, it was five o'clock in the morning as Cleo walked around the first floor bouncing the small, fussy baby. He'd been eating non-stop, clearly going through a growth spurt and she swore he'd been crying for days.
"Please, Grant, please..." she murmured to the crying baby, her own eyes filling with tears.
Getting up from the bed, James quietly made his way downstairs. He smiled at Cleo as he stepped up to her and offered to take his son. "Let me try," he said gently.
"Okay," she agreed, smoothing one hand over her face in an effort to wake herself up a little more. "I've fed him almost non-stop. I'm empty, he's eating too fast..."
"We might have to switch to formula when you go dry," James suggested as he gently rocked Grant in his arms. "He's growing at a slightly faster rate than a normal baby."
Cleo lowered herself carefully into the rocking chair, slumping back into it and she wiped her tired eyes again. "I'm trying to keep up... I'm eating those lactation cookies and drinking the tea, but it's not enough," she said, her voice tearful. "I haven't been able to get him to sleep for more than twenty minutes at a time."
"Honey don't blame yourself," James said softly. "It's not your fault. At all. Let me give Shuri a call. Would that be okay?"
"It's so early, don't wake her up because of me," she replied, trying her best to wipe her tears. She forced herself to take a slow, deep breath. "I'm sorry, I'm so tired but I can't sleep, even when he does."
"Honey, Shuri gets up pretty early. You need the relief," he said, hoping to gently reason with her.
She swallowed her stubborn impulse to refuse help and closed her eyes, exhaling a shaky breath as she nodded. "Okay," she reluctantly agreed.
James turned and dialed Shuri on the pad that sat on the kitchen counter. "Please don't be mad at me, baby."
"I'm not mad," she replied sadly, her eyes down on the floor. She didn't know what she was. Her hormones were running rampant and didn't feel like herself. Lack of sleep surely didn't help.
At the palace, Shuri heard the signal on her pad and answered. "James, is everything alright?" she asked, furrowing her brows.
"We're... okay," James answered. "But we're having a hard time keeping Grant fed. Cleo can't keep up."
"Is she drinking the tea? I know it doesn't taste great..." Shuri asked.
"Yes, and eating the cookies," Cleo answered for herself, wiping another stray tear from her face.
"For today, I would supplement with formula," Shuri said, knowing Cleo wanted to remain as natural as possible. "A fed baby is what is most important, remember that, usisi."
"I know..." Cleo replied, her voice pinched in her throat.
"I'll come by later today to take a sample of your milk. I may be able to synthesize it into its own formula," Shuri offered. "Is there anything else I can do to help?"
"That would be plenty, Shuri," James said softly. "I can have Steve come get formula. The little man is hungry, and Cleo is tapped out."
"I'll have formula ready for him. I'll come by and see you all later today," Shuri replied.
"Thank you, Shuri," Cleo said tiredly, resting her head back against the back of the rocking chair.
Steve's steps could be heard descending the stairs and as he appeared, he offered a smile to the others. "I heard my name," he said, stopping beside Bucky to lean in and press a gentle kiss to the top of Grant's head. "I'm running to the palace?"
James nodded. "For formula. He's calm for now, but Cleo can't keep up with his appetite."
"Can we stop saying that, please?" Cleo snapped wearily, tears in her voice. "Cleo can't keep up. It sounds terrible."
Steve walked over to Cleo and crouched down to her. "We're sorry, honey. We don't mean anything bad by it. He was just explaining things."
Her lip quivered as she averted her eyes from him. "I know... it just makes me feel like I'm not a good enough mother," she said, blinking out tears. "My nipples are red and sore and cracked and I'm doing everything I'm supposed to do, and I can't even soothe my own baby."
"Honey, you're an amazing mother," he said softly. "The strongest woman I have ever met. I mean that."
She dropped her face into her hands and rubbed her eyes roughly. "Oh please, we both know who Peggy Carter is. Like I hold a candle," she scoffed, wiping her tears. It wasn't rational, but there was no way she could be rational now. Not after all the trauma her body had been through in addition to being sleep deprived and hormonal.
Cleo's words stung, but Steve didn't show it. "I'll be back as quick as I can. Take a shower and get some sleep. We'll both watch Grant so you can rest."
She felt disgusting, so a shower wasn't a bad idea. She nodded, hoping the knowledge that they were both with the baby would help her actually fall asleep. "I'm sorry I snapped..." she said in a small voice.
"You're stressed baby. It's okay." Steve helped her stand before bending to kiss her softly. "I love you, dear girl."
"I love you," she echoed quietly in reply as Steve turned to head out of the house and to the palace. She glanced back at James then, jealous of the quiet that he could get out of their son. "I can't believe he'll sleep for you," she said as she carefully pushed herself up out of the chair.
"I run hot," James shrugged. "That's my best guess at the moment," he admitted.
She frowned as she approached them, wishing it was her who had gotten Grant to settle down. "I guess since... no one needs me here I'll go take a shower," she said, feeling useless.
"Baby..." James frowned, feeling tears in his eyes but he wouldn't let her see them. "All of us need you."
"Right..." she agreed reluctantly, her eyes holding the image of their sleeping son before she exhaled softly. "I'm going to try to sleep. Come get me if you all need anything."
"I will." James watched as she tiredly walked up the stairs. With an inward sigh, James sat in the nearby rocking chair and covered his face with one hand.
Steve didn't linger at the palace. Thanking Shuri, he headed back up to the house and was home in less than half an hour. As he walked in, he tried to quiet his steps as he saw Bucky. He wasn't sure if the other man managed to fall asleep.
Hearing Steve, James opened his eyes out of habit. Forever the light sleeper. He smiled upon seeing him. "Hey."
Steve smiled in kind. "Hey," he greeted, setting the formula on the counter. "Cleo getting some rest?" he asked as he approached Bucky.
"Reluctantly," he answered. "We might have to talk to Shuri about her. I'm thinking she has baby blues."
Steve sighed as he lowered himself into a chair across from Bucky. "I already mentioned it when I picked up the formula. Shuri's going to come spend some time with her later," he shared. "She's been through a lot."
"I know. I also know that she didn't mean to say what she did earlier." James gently rocked the chair back and forth as Grant stirred. "Can you make a bottle for him?"
"Yep," Steve said, getting up from the chair and walking back to the kitchen to go about making a bottle. "The Peggy thing? I'm not holding that against her. Objectively, Peggy was a very strong woman. But in different ways than Cleo has shown strength."
"I know. I just didn't want you to be upset," James told him as Grant began rooting back and forth. "Baby boy, my nipple will not give you anything."
Steve couldn't help but chuckle as he mixed the formula with water. "He's desperate," he said as he walked the bottle over, shaking it well on the way. Grant started to fuss just as he stepped up and handed Bucky the bottle. "Shh, we really want your mommy to get some sleep."
James sat up and turned Grant so he could give him the bottle, watching as the small infant eagerly ate. "Good boy."
"You know what might really change Cleo's mood? Show her how much we love her?" Steve asked. "If we finally got around to proposing to her."
"We need a ring to do that, though," he replied softly.
"I'm sure we can get Shuri's help with that," Steve suggested with a shrug. "She could find us something she knows Cleo would love."
"Or make something," James mused. "Could you bring her on the pad again? We can talk to her while Cleo sleeps."
"Yeah," Steve agreed, walking back over to the kitchen. He picked up the pad and brought it with him over to where Bucky was sitting and pressed the button to call.
The Princess's image popped up on the screen for the second time in a short time. "What can I do for you, gentlemen?" she asked. "Do you need me to come up sooner than this afternoon?"
"Not unless you want to," James replied. "But... we have a question for you."
"Hm?" she asked, raising her brows.
"We were wondering if you could find, or make a ring that Cleo would love," Steve said.
"Are you guys finally getting around to asking my girl to marry you?" Shuri asked excitedly.
James flushed, his eyes sparkling at the thought. "We want to make her ours."
"It's about time! She just had your baby," Shuri cheered. "I certainly have ideas of what she likes. Did you guys have any thoughts? How big of a diamond? Do you want a diamond or something different?"
"I think we're both a bit traditional... but she does like red... maybe add rubies?"
Immediately Shuri turned in her chair and pulled up a separate screen next to her to begin to develop ideas. "Traditional diamond with ruby accents, coming up," she agreed. "How is she, really? She seemed awfully weepy on the phone earlier..."
"She's... struggling," James said softly. "She thinks that none of us need her and that she's a bad mom. That woman is... she's the best mother this baby could ask for."
Shuri frowned softly. "She's going through a lot. Her hormones are all over the place and she just went through a major trauma," she explained, though the men didn't seem to be upset with the young woman. "I'll talk to her. There's something she could take to help if she's willing."
"Do you think she has more than the baby blues?" James asked softly.
Shuri sighed. "No, there's no reason to believe that yet," she advised. "I'd love to help her get some good sleep. I have a device I've been working on to induce R.E.M. sleep. It could make all the difference."
James looked down at Grant as he finished off his bottle. "I'm not sure if she'd do that. She wants to be able to hear Grant if he wakes up."
"Sure, I get that. But if the two of you are on duty maybe she'll use it every once in a while. It's better than never," she suggested with a small shrug. "I just don't want her to lose her mind."
"We don't want that either," James assured.
"I'll talk to her later. Let's hope she's sleeping now," Shuri replied. "I'll get to work on your ring. It shouldn't take me long. Make sure you propose the way she deserves."
Steve smiled brightly. "We plan to."
"I'll be by in a few hours. Take good care of that baby, gentlemen," she said before she hung up.
"Do you want me to burp him?" Steve offered.
James looked up at Steve and smiled. "Sure." She let Steve take Grant into his arms. "Just make sure you have that cloth. Spit up is awful."
"Cloth, check," Steve said, picking up the burp cloth before he picked up the baby. He gently patted Grant's lower back and paced back and forth. "Do you have any ideas of how we should propose?"
"I... Maybe at the beach?" He suggested. "Somewhere pretty."
"Oh wait... didn't you guys live across the lake from each other before you moved here?" Steve asked, hearing a small burp.
James smiled and nodded. "Yeah. We did."
Steve continued to rock Grant and gently pat his back as he mulled ideas. "What if we did something at the lake? It's where this all began."
"We haven't been back there in a long while," James agreed. "I think she'd like to see it again."
"We could make it nice, put up some lights or something, do it in the evening?" Steve suggested. He had always been kind of a romantic. "I'd really like to sweep her off of her feet here."
James chuckled. "You can do whatever you want."
"You know me, I've wanted a gal to make mine for a long time now," Steve replied with a slight blush of his cheeks. "She'll be ours, so I want you to be involved too."
"I will be. But you're better at making things more... elegant."
"We could get dressed up for her," he mused, grateful for the burp cloth as Grant spit up a little bit. "Shuri can watch Grant. Come up with some excuse about why she needs to head to the lake."
"If you can get Cleo to leave him behind. Because she not going to want to," James said.
Steve pursed his lips in thought. "Maybe Shuri can be with us, then, and take Grant once Cleo gets there?"
James smiled and nodded. "That sounds like a good idea."
"I'd love it, if someone did it for me," Steve remarked with a soft chuckle. "Cleo deserves something special. Being with the two of us... it isn't and won't always be easy."
"We make it work pretty well, though," James said softly then stood and gave Steve a clean burp cloth.
Steve nodded. "I think we do," he agreed, turning to glance at Bucky. He leaned in and pressed a kiss against Bucky's lips as he rocked Grant. "I still can't believe we get to do this together."
"It's a dream come true," James agreed before leaning in and stealing a lingering kiss.
"Literally," Steve agreed with a chuckle. He shifted Grant in his arms then and rocked him gently. "We might have him asleep for a little bit but I don't want to jinx it."
"He likes that vibrating, swaying thing Shuri gave us," James said. "But I don't know how to work it very well."
"Well between the two of us maybe we can make it work," Steve said with a shrug before heading over to the small swing. Very carefully, he bent down and gingerly placed Grant into the swing before he tried to look at the controls.
"Make sure you clip him in," James said softly. "There's a little seatbelt."
"Oh, thanks," Steve acknowledged, pausing to make sure Grant was secure before he carefully turned the dial. Slowly, the swing began to move back and forth, and Steve stepped back. "Let's see how long we get out of this."
James chuckled softly. "I think he's got a full belly, so he should sleep for a few hours. I hope."
Steve heaved a sigh and smoothed his hands over his face. "I hope too," he acknowledged. "Back in our day, we wouldn't even be this involved. Can you imagine how different this would have been?"
"I couldn't be that way," James said with a shake of his head. "I want to be involved with my children."
"So do I," Steve agreed. "But we always were men out of time, weren't we? We were always a little more progressive."
James nodded. "More than a little. We would have been forced to leave the army if they knew we had feelings for each other."
"Absolutely," Steve said with a scoff. "After the army, though... we could have moved far out somewhere, just the two of us."
"Things didn't pan out that way. But I'm glad we have what we have now."
"Oh, don't get me wrong, I am too," Steve quickly agreed. "It's just funny to think about. If... all this hadn't happened to us where we might be."
"I... I don't like to think of what if's," James said softly.
Steve glanced in Bucky's direction and nodded gently. "It's okay, I get it. We don't have to talk about that," he offered. "Now is... pretty perfect anyway."
He smiled and nodded at Steve before he stood and wrapped his arms around his partner. "Yeah, it is."
Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky in kind and pressed a kiss to the side of his head. "I love you, Buck. I always have."
"I love you too," James replied, burying his head against his shoulder, relaxing into his embrace.
Steve relaxed his shoulders and accepted Bucky into himself even further. He gently smoothed his hands over his lover's back and breathed slowly and deeply. "It's all working out now, Buck. We finally got what we always wanted."
James nodded, feeling tears well in his eyes, but he refused to let them fall. The stress of the past few weeks, bubbling to the surface.
"Come on, pal... let go," Steve gently nudged, squaring his stance a little to take more of the weight of the man in his arms.
He shook his head, fighting how he felt. "I have to be strong," he whispered.
"Why?" Steve asked quietly. "I've got you. No one else is here. You need to let go."
"I have to be strong for her," he whispered. "I don't want to let her down."
"She is asleep," Steve coached patiently. "She can't see you. And sometimes being strong for her means taking care of yourself."
James' shoulders shook as silent tears ran down his cheeks. "We could have lost them," he whispered.
"But we didn't," Steve reminded gently, slowly smoothing his hand over Bucky's back. He couldn't put himself in Bucky's shoes, he'd had to bear so much alone until Steve had been able to make it back. He hated that he left in the first place. "We're all here. I know it was scary..."
"I've never been more scared in my life," he sobbed. James had been through literal hell in his lifetime, but the thought of losing Cleo would have killed him.
"I'm so sorry you were alone," Steve said softly, resting his cheek against the side of Bucky's head. "But you did an amazing job. You fought through it and you won, baby. You won."
"You helped," he sniffled. "More than you ever know."
"I wish I had been here for you, for all of you... but you did a great job without me," Steve assured him. "And now Cleo is home, and Grant is home, and everyone is okay."
James shook his head as he lifted his head, feeling Steve wipe at his face. "You were there. For us both. Maybe not in person, but you were there."
"Thank you for saying that," Steve thanked graciously. Maybe one day he'd feel like he'd done enough, but that wasn't really his way. "It's okay to feel like you need to break down, Buck. I did, with Sam before I left."
He smiled at Steve, feeling a bit better. "Thanks Steve."
"Anytime," the other man affirmed. He gently released Bucky. "I'm always here for a strong shoulder to cry on."
"You're so much more than that," he assured. "You know that."
"Yes, I do know that," Steve agreed. "Now, since he's asleep, when's the last time you got any decent sleep?"
"It's been a while," he admitted.
"So, you go lay down too," Steve encouraged. "I'll lay here on the couch in case Grant wakes up. I got decent sleep last night, so it's my turn."
James smiled tiredly before kissing Steve softly. "I'll go lay with Cleo," he murmured.
"Sleep well," he replied sweetly, watching as he left before he stationed himself on the couch.