While Gwen, aiden, jay and I are sitting on the couch. Leis comes downstairs and sees Nikki and nate making out. "Do they know you guys are here?" Leia asks.
"On they don't care. They're in the zone, nothing breaks it" jay says while tossing a ball. "Watch this." He says while throwing a ball at nate. Nate catches the ball and throws it back at jay.
"How can she kiss my brother? His dentist quit in the middle of an exam." Gwen says.
"Ew." Aiden says with a face of disgust.
"Guys." Ozzie says. I then look at Ozzie and see nate is massaging his head "I got to close, and now I'm stuck in it." He adds on.
"That happened to me once... never again." Aiden says.
Nate then stops massaging Ozzie's head and he's it's in the chair next to the couch. "We've all been there. When you're in the middle of a make out session and you're in the moment." Jay says.
"And your lips just melt together." Gwen says
"And his tongue hits the handy thing in the back of your throat and it feels so good." Leia says.
We then all look at Leia with a confused look and Gwen says "what?"
"The... uvula. The U-spot?" Leia says with a chuckle.
"Something tells me you haven't had your first kiss." I say.
Gwen then asks "have you ever kissed anyone?"
"Never. Not once." She says. She then gets up and says " it's just never happened, okay? In sixth grade, I was a foot taller than all the other boys, and just when they got up to mouth level, I did two years of advanced braces."
"Like headgear?" Leia asks.
"It was so much worse. There was a crank my parents had to tighten every night. It was like starting an old-timey car." Leia says.
"I mean it worked." I say trying to complement her.
"Yeah, you have such a beautiful smile." Jay says trying to flirt.
"Do you ever take a day off?" Gwen asks.
"I wanna kiss someone. I think about it all the time." Leia says and then looks at Nikki and nate "what's it like?" She loudly whispers.
"Okay this is an emergency. We need to get you your first kiss." Gwen says and then gets up and adds on "let's go to the mall and knock this out."
"The mall? Oh don't make me start on a mannequin." Leia complains.
I then get up and say "a mannequin? What do you take us for?"
"A mall is full of guys. We'll find some goober, chat him up, show him your teeth, lay one in him" Gwen says.
"I don't want my first kiss to be with a goober" Leia complains.
"Mannequin it is!" Aiden says.
"No, Leia's right we should just wait till you're confident enough , emotionally reedy, secure in who you are-"
"Okay, okay! Mall." Leia says and then turns to Ozzie "summer of our first kiss. Right Ozzie?" Leia says.
"Don't lump me in with you, you mouth virgin." Ozzie says. "I have Etienne." He adds on.
"Bro I wanna support you, but you gotta stop with the fake Canadian boyfriend." Gwen says.
"Oh he's real as hell!" Ozzie says. "My parents took me to see phantom of the opera in Montreal, and I meet the cutest guy... Etienne. We were both reaching for the last kids XL souvenir sweatshirt, and he let me keep it." Ozzie adds.
"We've never seen the sweatshirt." Jay says.
"Whatever! You wouldn't know romance if it threw acid in your face, forcing you into a life of solitude, composing the music of the night." Ozzie says.
"Poetic." Aiden says.
"God I hope he's real." Gwen says.
"Same." I say.
Nikki and nate then stop making out and Nikki asks us "she did you guys get here?"
"We we're making out." Nate says with a chuckle.
"I didn't notice." I say sarcastically.
————
"Thanks for the ride, grandpa." Leia says.
"Any time you kids wanna get out of my house, I'll drive you." Red says.
"This shouldn't take too long." Leia says.
"You're funny." I say.
"You guys need anything?" Red asks.
"A miracle." Ozzie says.
"Fine. I'll be right over here, reading my paper." Red says and then sits down in a massage chair.
————
"I'm really nervous. My back sweats being funneled right into my butt." Leia says.
"Ew never say that again." I say.
"That's just your body getting ready for romance. You're cute, you're smart and you're awesome! You can do this." Gwen says.
Then Ozzie and Aiden walk back and Ozzie says a total sausage fest." Ozzie says.
"Yeah, look at all these guys." Gwen says.
"No. Hickory farms is giving out free samples. Etienne loves a nice smoked Gouda." Ozzie says.
"Fine. If he's real, what's his last name?" Gwen asks Ozzie.
"St. Bernard." Ozzie says.
"Isn't that a dog..." I say.
"What school does he go to?" Gwen asks.
"St. Bernard's." Ozzie says.
"Does he have any pets?" Gwen asks.
"Bichon Frisé." Ozzie says.
"Wait. That reminds me. I've given CPR to a dog. Does that count as a kiss?" Leia asks.
"I- no." I say.
Gwen then pushes Leia and says "Go. You got this!" She says.
"Anyways, take me to those samples." I say excitingly.
"Follow me." Aiden says.
————
While Ozzie and I are looking at the giant buckets of candy a mall guard comes up to us and says "you kids need to leave."
"You don't happen to have a son my age, do you?" Leia asks. Without a word the mall guard walks away.
"So it went well." Aiden asks sarcastically.
"No. Let's go. Where's Gwen?" Leia asks.
"Gwen let's bounce." Ozzie says turning to Gwen. I then turn to Gwen and see she's making out with some guy. At the sight I start to feel jealous? I can't figure out if it's because of Gwen or cause of the guy. "Gwen!" Ozzie repeats.
Gwen then looks at us and grabs her stuff "bye Kevin. That was fun." Gwen says.
"Best day of my life." Kevin says.
"Calm down Kevin." Gwen says.
"Seriously!" Leia says.
"One of us had to get some." Gwen says.
"Make that two of us." Aiden says while walking towards us.
————
"That was a disaster! And I'm on a list now, so I can't go back what if I need new shoes?" Leia says while barging into the basement.
"What do you mean what if?" Ozzie says.
"Woah gross. Why does your mouth look like a monkeys ass?" Gwen says looking at nate.
I then put my head in Gwen's should and look at nate "Ew! You look you tired to kiss a vacuum." I say
"A monkeys ass? Like in a good or bad way?" Nate asks.
"A monkeys as scan look good?" Aiden asks.
"Come in we should probably get you to urgent care." Nikki says while getting up.
"You said it wasn't bad." Nate says while getting up.
"Yeah she lied." Aiden says.
"I was just comfortable and didn't wanna get up." Nikki says while walking out of the basement while holding Nate's hand.
"Oh my god. I'm at the mall throwing myself at randos. Meanwhile they're making out so much his lips revolted." Leia says while flopping on the couch. "What's wrong with me? Doesn't anyone want to lick these $2000 teeth?" Leia asks
"Jay does." I say.
"Wow, okay." Gwen says while sitting down next to Leia. I then follow her and sit next to Gwen and then she says "Well there is another idea, but I didn't wanna bring it up because it feels kinda weird and desperate."
"I think we're there." Ozzie says.
"Agreed." Aiden says while eating a popsicle.
"You could kiss jay. He's cute. He's always flirting with you. Plus he's a Kelso." Gwen says.
"So? What does that mean?" Leia asks.
"He's a man-whore." Ozzie says.
"Oh." Leia says. "As great as that sounds I'm gonna pass. Plus he sour friend. It's to awkward. There's gotta be someone else." Leia says.
"There's always town pool Ricky." Ozzie says.
"Oh great, a lifeguard. That's hot." Leia says.
Aiden and I laugh and then Ozzie says "no he just hangs out and collects the floating bandaids. But he's single and ready to mingle. At least that's what his shirt says."
"So jay?" Gwen asks.
"Jay is is." Leia says.
————
Eventually Ozzie, Gwen, Aiden and I decided to go home so Leia could invite jay over. Once I get home I immediately go to my room and flop on my bed. The entire walk home I couldn't stop thinking about Gwen. I don't know why I'm acting like this or why I can't stop thinking about Gwen. I mean we've been friends for as long as I can remember. But I've never thought of her like this.
I wish I could figure out what's wrong with me.