"Fear is temporary. Regret is forever."
‒ Dan Skinner
Olivia Bennett
My body was layered in goosebumps as we stood on the front porch of my parents house. We've been standing here in the cold weather for ten minutes.
I haven't been inside of this house since the day I turned eighteen. I thought I was ready to face my family but being here is a completely different story.
Aaron took his suit jacket off and wrapped it around me about five minutes ago and I still haven't moved. I feel horrible because he's also freezing but I can't find it in myself to knock on the door.
"Olivia," His voice broke through the strong winds. "We don't have to go in." He's reminded me at least three times we can just leave and pretend we were never even here but I can't.
I can't knock on the door but I can't walk away. Without thinking, I reach my hand up, tapping my knuckles on the redwood door three times.
After a few moments, my mother opens the door. Her eyes snap from me to Aaron. I take a deep breath trying to remain calm. His hand touches mine and then his fingers interlock with mine.
"Hello, Mrs. Bennett." Aaron takes a step forward, offering her his free hand. "It's nice to meet you." Her eyes fall to the black band on his finger and back to me.
She shakes his hand and steps back, inviting us in. He allows me to go first and I'm instantly greeted by my father.
"Oh, it's so good to see you." His hug is tight and suffocating but I don't mind. At least he's happy to see me.
"Hi, dad." He let me out of his tight embrace but held my shoulders, looking me up and down.
"You look incredible, sweetie." I gave him a warm smile and hugged him once more before returning to Aaron's side.
My mother glared at me as she closed the door behind us. All of my hopes that this would be a good night vanished.
A gasp sounds from the other room and when I turn around, my sister is approaching me with her arms wide. She wraps them around me and rests her head on my shoulder.
All of my worries about tonight slowly disintegrate as we hug each other. It's been far too long since I've felt this comfort and warmth.
"I've missed you so much," She whispers into my ear. Her voice is heavy with sadness and I can't help but wonder why. I pulled back, looking at her.
"What's wrong?" I whispered back. She dropped her head and stepped back, ignoring the conversation.
I give her a confused look before turning back to my parents. I try my best not to show any emotion in case they hadn't noticed something was wrong with my sister. If she's trying to hide that then I want to help her.
"Food's almost ready so you guys can take a seat at the table," My mom headed to the kitchen without another word and my father guided Aaron, my sister and I to the dinner table.
It was beautifully set with rose-gold utensils and crème napkins that were embroidered with red flowers. If there was one thing my parents spent reasonable money on, it was their decor.
My father took a seat at the end of the table and Aaron sat next to him, and I sat next to Aaron. My sister was across from us and now that we'd moved into better lighting, her sadness was clear as day.
I wanted to ask her about it but I didn't want to mention it in front of everyone. I'd wait until later when we could sneak away for a bit.
My mom entered the room with multiple bowls occupying her arms and hands. She placed them in the center of the table and then took a seat at the other end.
I picked up my fork when someone else entered the dining room. My fork immediately fell out of my hand, clashing with the other utensils that laid on my napkin.
I felt everyone's eyes on me as I stared at the man who had just walked in. I couldn't move, my body was frozen in place and I don't think I'd ever be able to move again.
My uncle stood in the doorway, eyeing me. He looked as though he was equally as shocked as me. The expression on his face fueled the fire inside of me.
Aaron's hand squeezed mine on top of my thigh under the table. My mind was at a complete halt. I couldn't move, I couldn't think, I couldn't breathe.
This was the reason I didn't want to come, but I also didn't want to admit this sad truth to Aaron. I'm sure if I had, he'd tell me I couldn't go and he wouldn't give me a choice.
I cleared my throat and peeled my eyes off of my uncle, staring at the plate in front of me.
"What's wrong?" Aaron whispered into my ear. I glanced over and shook my head.
"John, take a seat." I return my eyes to my plate as he sits right next to me. My breath catches in my throat and I feel like I'm suffocating.
For the next several minutes, my parents converse with Aaron. Mainly questions about how we met, why we decided to marry so quickly, what he did for work.
My sister sat quietly, poking at the food on her plate and my uncle did the same. I felt disgusted just sitting here. Being in his presence made me feel like I was a little girl again, having to sit next to him during dinner like nothing was wrong. I cringed at the horrible memory.
After more small talk, my parents decided to clean up our plates and the table.
My sister was visibly uncomfortable and so was I. My body was stiff, my forehead was dripping with sweat, and my nails were digging into the skin on my thigh.
Suddenly, a hand was on my shoulder. Not Aaron's hand, but my uncle's. I shuddered as he touched me.
"Olivia," I closed my eyes, trying to erase his voice from my mind. I placed my other hand on top of Aaron's and squeezed. "How have you been?" His tone was so condescending and the way his words slurred out of his mouth disgusted me.
Aaron's hand abruptly slammed onto the table, shaking all of the glasses that remained. "Get your hands off of her." He stood from his seat and John's hand fell from my shoulder.
"Hey man, chill out." John put his hands in the air and scooted his chair back, standing up. He disappeared into the kitchen and I slumped into my seat, just wanting to vanish.
"Are you okay?" When I looked up, Aaron was staring at my sister with a worried expression. Although he wasn't asking me, it warmed my heart that he cared about Natalie. I felt a huge relief in my chest now that John was gone.
Natalie slowly nodded her head, "I'm okay, thank you."
I reached across the table, holding out my hand. She put hers in mine and gave me a weak smile.
"What's wrong, Nat?" I asked. Now that my parents were gone, hopefully she'd talk to me.
"I..." She hesitated.
I rubbed my thumb against the back of her hand giving her time.
"Olivia," Her voice cracked. "Since you left..." She didn't even need to finish her sentence for me to understand what was happening. Tears instantly filled my eyes as I realized what she was saying to me.
I squeezed her hand tightly and closed my eyes, allowing the tears to fall. Since I left three years ago, my uncle turned his attention onto my little sister.
John has been touching Natalie just like he used to touch me before I escaped.
I regret escaping.