"Are you joking?" Damion whispered to me. We were sitting at the back of our history class while Mr Peterson droned on. I had taken this opportunity to tell Damion and Jason my plan. They had both instantly believed my encounter with the demons. However, I think that might have been because Alice had got to them first. That was the easy bit though. What was harder to believe was what I planned to do next. Damion checked Mr Peterson hadn't noticed our conversation before continuing. "You want to catch a demon?" he said. "You? The poster girl for angelic studies wants to catch a demon?"
"Any other way you want to put it?" I hissed at him.
"But you're the one who always goes on about the dangers of meddling with Order stuff," he hissed back. "Wasn't one demon encounter enough?" I hadn't thought about this much as the idea of capturing a demon had engulfed me. I tried to think back to the fear I felt during my face-off with the ghasts last week. The memory was almost a blur now. All I could remember now was the demon's words about my prophecy. And that outweighed any fear I had.
There was a cough from the front of the classroom. Mr Peterson was staring right at us, arms crossed. "Anything you would like to share with the class?" he said.
I didn't want to share one syllable of what I had said with the rest of the class. So, I just looked abashed while Damion took the lead with one of his fake stories. One history lesson and two detention notes later, Alice, Damion, Jason, and I were chilling at our usual spot on the playground. We sat near the library as it was quieter and less likely for a stray ball to hit you. We were all enjoying our lunches until Damion broke the silence. "Do you know, the thing that got me most about going beyond the Halo was the sky not being the same colour," he said. We all stopped chewing. I had forgotten that the other three had their own experiences with the demonlands, though theirs weren't so dramatic. It hadn't occurred to me to ask how they felt about their trip beyond the Halo. "What kind of power allows them to change the sky?" he continued. We shrugged at each other because none of us knew. Damion looked at me for a minute. I had never seen him look concerned before. "You sure you wanna do this?" he asked.
I nodded. This was the only way. The worst-case scenario was me being eaten by a rogue demon. Still, best-case scenario, I might end up helping the Order. "So, how we going to do it?" Alice said.
"We?" I repeated. "You guys aren't helping me with this. I'm not putting your lives endanger too."
"Yes we are," Alice said. "I will not have my best-friend take on a demon alone. Again. You need backup." She pointed at Damion, "you're in, right?"
"Of course," Damion said, without hesitation. "We'll become legends."
Alice then pointed at Jason. Jason didn't reply. Instead, he slowly took one more bite of his sandwich. I understood his worry. His father was a auxiliary officer for the Order, and this kinda behaviour was super illegal. If anyone caught us messing about with this kinda stuff, we'd be spending a night in the cells. Finally, he gave a sharp nod.
In victory, Alice turned to me, "See? Backup." I knew there was no point debating with her. Plus, this wasn't the main issue with my plan. "So, how do we catch a demon?" She asked me.
This is where my idea collapsed. "I don't know," I said. The other three were looking at me, expectantly. This was my plan, after all. I had the highest grades in angelic studies, so I was most equipped. But that was like saying I was the only one to bring a toothpick to a lion fight. However, I did have an idea about where to start. "We have angelic studies, next. I'm gonna use that time to search the textbooks."
Our angelic studies' textbooks were the only ones without a copy in the library. Instead, all of them were locked away inside a cupboard in Mrs Reynolds' classroom. I didn't understand why it was so secret as the books contained nothing dangerous. Blessings were mentioned casually, and the book was more a guide to the Order, and it's history. As soon as we sat down, Mrs Reynolds unlocked her cupboard with a rusty key and began handing out the textbooks. As I was the star pupil, I sat at the back by myself while Alice and Damion sat at the front, which would come in handy. "Now, class, please turn to page two-hundred-and-five," she barked at us. Mrs Reynolds was a retired monk from the temple, and I was super glad she never went further than that. Damion had pushed her sometimes where I half expected a bolt of lightning to just strike him. She glared down at us all, making sure none of us went to a different page. Her gaze hovered on me for a split second before returning to the front row. "Today, class, we will be looking at the schism between the Order of Angels and the Terra Movement and aim to- DAMION!"
Damion had picked his first chance of a distraction. He was doodling on his notebook, in full view of Mrs Reynolds. I tensed my fingers. Not wasting my opportunity, I quickly turned to the back of the textbook. My eyes darted to all my classmates, who were giggling at Damion's crude drawing. "It's for art class, Mrs. Ain't I talented?" Mrs Reynolds did not find it amusing and kept her angry long enough for me to study the index. I scanned line after line, searching for any clue to a tip for how to catch demons. Nothing stood out. I scrolled down the long lists of names and words for things I had never heard of. Finally, I found a page on demons. I memorised the page number and flipped back to my page as Mrs Reynolds began her class again. I rested my chin on my hands, trying to look interested.
"Now has anyone heard of the Terra Movement?" No one in the class spoke. I knew a little, but I was focused on the textbook. I bent over my desk, trying to keep low and out of sight. "No one?" She asked. "Well, it is what we call an Order of faith, but unfortunately their faith is not well placed. They wish to worship the world rather than the Divine that gave it to them." Alice raised her hand, and I waited for my moment. "Yes, Alice?" Mrs Reynolds said, glaring down at her.
"Mrs, isn't that what witches do?" Alice asked. I closed my eyes as there was an audible gasp from my classmates. That was a little too far. Mrs Reynolds went red and bared down on Alice. "No, Alice, absolutely not," she said through gritted teeth. This was my only chance. I flipped to the demon part of the book and read furiously. Nothing jumped out, I couldn't even find a description of a demon. I scanned and scanned while Mrs Reynolds launched into a rant about how witches were a forbidden subject and how disrespectful Alice was. When Mrs Reynolds' rant was coming to an end and I had found nothing. I turned the page to find the chapter on Priests. The textbook had nothing about demons that would help me catch one. My greatest source of knowledge and it was useless. My heart clenched as I search for literally anything. Mrs Reynolds finally said, "And never repeat that word in my classroom again, Alice. Do I make myself perfectly clear?"
I slouched in my chair, defeated. This wasn't fair. If I had a destiny, shouldn't this be easy? The monks and history teachers had always made the Prophets' lives sound so easy. I was trying to not let my disappointment consume me. Before I turned back to the right page, I caught a glance at the Priest page again. There wasn't anything interesting in the text, just some general background of what the Priests' Order was and where you could find them. But, right at the top of the page, there was a quote. A Priest is no stronger than their faith and diligence to their Lexicon. I stared at the word lexicon. An idea came to me, which made me go numb. "Sara, are you paying attention back there?" Mrs Reynolds' words rang in my ears. I jumped and nodded furiously at her. The rest of the lesson I sat in silence, which drew some concerning looks from Mrs Reynolds. Even some of my classmate's muttered about how I was having an off day. I didn't care, my mind was grappling with what I would have to do next.
The bell rang, and the class left the room. As I walked past, I could feel Mrs Reynolds' eyes on me. I didn't want to engage with her and headed straight for my next class. Alice and the others weren't in my next lesson, so I had a whole lesson to think about my realisation by myself. Explaining what I was going to do next would be hard enough, let alone doing it. At break time, I found the others waiting by our usual spot. The two boys were congratulating Alice on pissing Mrs Reynolds off so spectacularly. They looked up as soon as I approached. "Well, did you find anything?" Alice asked, before I'd even had a chance to sit down. I hesitated, my insides just wanting me to throw away the idea and never think of it again.
"I'm guessing that's a no?" Jason said.
"If it's a no, then why do you look like you just swallow mouldy porridge?" Alice asked.
I took a deep breath. "I kinda found something." The others looked around to check no one was near before coming close.
"Like for real found something," Alice whispered.
I nodded. "Not about demons, though. But, about where to find the answers."
"Let me guess, it's going to involve detention again?" Damion said, stretching like he was a professional athlete.
"No," I hissed. "This is far more dangerous, and you can't get involved." The three of them looked confused. To them, what could be more dangerous than detention with Mrs Reynolds. Reluctantly, I said the words I never thought I would say. "I need to borrow my dad's Celestial Lexicon."
There group replied with dead silence. If Alice had stepped out of line with her witches comment, I was on the moon. Those books were sacred to most people, as it contained blessings and knowledge from every age and the Priest's personal work. Apart from mum and I, it was the most important thing in Dad's life. He guarded that book with his life and locked it away in his study every day. Even getting a glance at it would mean breaking into his personal study. It was the only access I would have to that kind of information. No library or books store would have a lexicon in the whole of Britannia.
Jason exchanged a look with Damion. "You know this is a bit too far, right?" Jason said. His voice was firm, and he had locked eyes with me. "Detention is one thing, but stealing your dad's lexicon."
"I didn't say I was going to steal it," I snapped back. Even the accusation that I would betray my dad like that stung. But I wasn't sure if I was angry at Jason or myself for thinking of this plan. I calmed myself before continuing. "I just need to have a look at it. Not steal or do anything with it."
"Still," Damion said, "you think your dad will let you just look up how to catch a demon. Not in a million years, Sara. This is out of our league."
I turned to Alice, the one person who I thought would be bold enough to do something this stupid, or at least back me up. But her shoulders were slouched, and she didn't meet my eyes. I knew even for her, this was crossing a line. All the excitement of us going off to capture a demon seemed to have deflated out of the group. They were demoralised and now had enough detentions for a week between us. "Ok," I said, "you're right."
Jason looked relieved, but the other two just looked sad. I knew the guys would do anything for me, but this was just too far. We spent the rest of the break in silence, letting the truth settle in. The rest of the day just happened with nothing really sticking out to me. I just wanted to get home and collapse on my bed. Alice tried to chat on the bus home, but I could feel she felt awkward. When we got off the bus and went to depart down our separate roads, she gave me a hug. "I'm sorry we couldn't help," she whispered in my ear.
"No worries," I replied, pulling away. "You got detention for me, what more could I ask for?" I beamed at her until she would smile back. She said her farewell, and I watched her vanish down her street. The last stretch home was a challenge as I tried not to let the events of that afternoon take over. I barely spoke to my parents, especially my dad. The guilt of even thinking of stealing his lexicon was suffocating. I ate dinner in silence, even though my parents tried to coax some kind of conversation from me. Dad sat opposite me, trying to talk about the preparations for the Festival of Angels was going. I could barely look at him. When there was a silence I knew both my parents were looking at me. I had to say something or they would start worrying again. "Dad," I asked, still not looking at him, "why did you join the Priest Order?"
I played with my food as my dad swallowed his last mouth fall. "Thats a complicated question," he said, looking wistfully into the distance. I waited, hoping the seconds could drag by so I could just go to bed. "I guess, I mainly did it cause it was the right thing to do."
"The right thing to do?" I repeated. I had heard people talk about joining the Order as a noble thing to do but not the right thing.
"Yeah, like an instinct," Dad explained. "When I first saw a blessing, something deep inside me told me I needed to be a part of this. That this was important. So I joined up. Always listen to your instinct." He smiled at me while mum rolled her eyes. They had always disagreed on my future. But I just sat still, a little dumbfounded. I had never heard Dad speak so openly about his work before and I had half expected him to say something about helping people or being part of the community. Like an instinct he had said. I knew exactly what he was talking about. It was the very feeling that wanted me to use Dad's lexicon.
I went to bed but couldn't sleep. That instinct was tearing my soul apart. It was like a riving pile of excited snakes, each one hissing at me to do it. I couldn't help worrying if I had been secretly corrupted. But the descriptions of corruptions were not like this. People spoke of feeling cold and suppressed into doing the demons' will as their corruption engulfed them. But I was perfectly warm, and this feeling was more encouragement than brute demands. It was like a friend, gently telling me to try something. I thought back to Alice and the gang. Even though they all agreed this was too far, this feeling told me they were wrong. But that same feeling had made Dad join the Order. And even he had said to always follow it. I turned in my bed to look at the door. I had to make a choice now. Either I do what my trusted friends say and forget about it, or follow my Dad's advice and act upon the instinct that would lead me to betraying him.
I stepped out onto our landing in pitch blackness. While my eyes adjusted to the dark, I listened for my parents' breathing. The continuous rhythm was all I needed to know they were asleep. I crept downstairs, not daring to use my phone's torch in case something happened. My hands ran along the walls as I felt my way to the back of the house.
Dad's office was the smallest room, but by far the most important. We had offered him a bigger space in the past, but he always said he likes it as it was his own special spot. Now, looking at the door into it, the room was more daunting than special. Everything my dad had studied to become a Priest was in there. Forbidden knowledge that was beyond any civilian, especially a teenager. I turned on my phone's light and studied the door handle. For all the wonders of modern technology, Dad hid everything behind a classic locked door. Pulling a hair clip out, I got to my knees and began to pick the lock. Damion had shown us how to do this thinking lock-picking was a skill to impress the ladies. I had never thought his lessons would ever become useful. There was a click as I finally tapped the right lock into place. I looked around to see if my parents had heard me. It was hard to listen out as the blood pumping in my ears deafened me. Once I was one hundred percent sure no one was coming, I snuck inside.
Shining the light around the cramped room, I took in my dad's workspace. It was a bare as it was small. There were no pictures or ornaments. Even the windows didn't have curtains, so the moonlight flooded in. All that was there was a cramped looking desk, a lamp, and a simple office chair. In the centre of the desk was my dad's lexicon. My heart was racing now. I shuffled around the edge of the desk and perched on dad's chair. The book was a beautiful mahogany brown with golden letters on the front, no bigger than my hand. It just lay there doing nothing. And yet, I was afraid of it. It was so odd that such an unassuming book would have so much power over me. I didn't even want to reach out and touch it. Rumours had always circled around playgrounds, telling gruesome tales about unwitting children taking a glance at their parent's lexicon with horrific consequences. I had never paid attention to them as it didn't make sense. The Priest's power was good, so how could it harm us?
Cautiously, I gave the book a flick so the front cover opened for a second. Nothing happened. I was half expecting an alarm to go off or something. Inching closer, I turned the book to the front page. There was a standard ownership note at the front with my dad's name filled in with red ink. I tried not to think of what he would say if he knew what I was up to. On the next page was the index. It was written in curly black ink that looked more like carvings than words. I surveyed the page for anything that would be a good start.
As I read further and further down, it only dawned on me how much the Order hid from civilians. We had been told that Priests were there just to help and heal civilians. There were sections for healing and shield blessings. But I also read words like lightning, fire, and spear. Were they teaching my dad everything he needed to know to fight a demon? I shivered. I couldn't imagine my dad on a battlefield, fighting of a ghast by himself. I imagined they just taught the Priests the protective stuff...but then who learned to summon lightning?
Somewhere in the middle were the words Barriers, Walls, and Shields. That was as good a start as any. If I was going to capture a demon I was going to have to protect myself. I ran through the corner of the pages, forcing myself not to glance at anything else. If I took just a peek at anything else, I might never stop reading it. I found the page I needed and opened the book to it.
It was like no book I had ever seen: the words were silvery on the pale parchment, almost like smoke hovering over the page. It was strange and smooth, like a thousand rivers cutting through the landscape. I did not know what these words were, but their meaning seemed to float up to me like they desired nothing more than to bond with me. The longer I stared at the page, the longer I understood. There were diagrams like spiderwebs, intricate designs I felt rather than read. I had to concentrate so my amazement wouldn't suck me in. There was no knowing how long I had. However, as I absorbed the words and diagrams, I knew what this was.
Even though I was not a Priest or an Arknight, I knew that their power came from their Divine blood. Everyone was connected to the Divine, which we all called a soul. Those able to use the angelic powers drew strength from their souls to manipulate the world around them like the Divine had when they forged the earth. But now, I had a completely different understanding of it. The words of the blessings spoke of how to channel your connection with the Divine, to unleash a power I thought only possible by a few. There were detailed instructions of where to let the power flow, how to meld your hands, and what state of mind to conjure a powerful blessing. I read and reread the words on the page, hoping to memorize them. I tried taking a photo of the page, yet the words were never in focus and the screen went all wavy like the knowledge was for human eyes only.
Reading the words on the page again, I lifted my hand and pointed it at the door. I wanted to see if I could do it. The book spoke about conjuring a shield inside my heart as well in front of me. I had my hand flat like it was pressed up against an invisible wall. With all my strength I tried, but nothing happened. I read again, and a passage stood out. As with the walls of any castle, its strength comes from within. A focused soul will produce an impenetrable wall no demon can conquer. I had to have focus, which was a little tricky as I was still terrified I'd hear my dad's footsteps any minute now. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, forcing myself to forget what I was doing.
I lifted my hand up. I knew I had failed to produce a wall again, but there was something different. From my core, running along my arm was a throbbing of power that I had never experienced before. It was like pain from a cut, sharp and focused. It empowered me rather than scared me. I wanted to keep this power flowing. My hand shook as the energy begun to build, making it hard for me to keep my hand still. After a few seconds, I let go. The energy dissipated inside me as I let my arm drop. My arm ached like I had just completed a hundred press-ups, but I didn't care. The pain was well worth the excitement I was feeling right now. I hadn't produced a guardian shield, but I had felt it, the power of the Divine coursing through me. It just told me this was possible. I could catch a demon. I reluctantly closed my dad's lexicon and left the office just how I found it. Laying in bed again, the endless joy ran around my body again and again. I was glad I listened to my instinct. And, for the first time in my life, I considered becoming a Priest, just to get my hands on my own lexicon.