Idiots to Lovers (bxb)

Galing kay itsmeimthevampire

344K 20.5K 16K

||WATTY WINNER 2023🌟|| Two strangers pretend to be a couple to win a dumb bet. The wager: they must enrol in... Higit pa

1 | Neon Nike's and Chocolate Muffins
2 | Sunlight, Buttercups, and All Things Yellow
3 | Lost Keys and Grandma's Wrestling Career
5 | Faking Allergies and Losing At Therapy
6 | Fake Orchids and Exchanging Numbers
7 | The Pain of Having an Older Sibling
8 | A Furious Manager and A Brave Escapade
9 | Stolen Ice Cream and Sneaky Sheep
10 | Breaking Eggs For A Hundred Cupcakes
11 | Lumpy Toadstools and Fondant Flowers
12 | Rainbow Caterpillar and The Chair Pile
13 | Three Reasons Why
14 | A Depressing Spotify Playlist
15 | Just Two Bros Making Christmas Cake
16 | Roller Skates and Disco Lights
17 | random short chapter just here to piss my readers off xP
18 | why can't this boy just go out and do something instead of listening to...
19 | The Allergies Are For Real This Time (I Swear)
20 | Breaking Brownies and a Bit of Bribery
21 | Happy Songs and Runny Eggs
Part Two - taking reader requests for special scenes
22 | That Annoying Beam of Light That Wakes You Every Morning
23 | Always Keep Your Phone on Silence When Sneaking Around
24 | The Addiction Starts
25 | House on Fire
26 | Things Only Get Worse Where Everett Is Concerned
27 | The Not-Very-Relaxing Drive
Bonus | Poem by Brian
28 | Ice-cream Date
Flashback | So Far In The Friendzone
Flashback | It Was Most Definitely A Date, Right?
Flashback | It doesn't make a difference if he's gay-he still wouldn't like you
29 | You've sucked me into the absolute torture that is Wattpad
30 | Glow in the dark stickers
31 | Honestly, I do not trust everett and I do not trust whatever he is planning
32 | How Many Kinds of Green Are There Anyway?
33 | Paint Got On Everything Except For The Wall
34 | This Was Really Not My Fault
35 | The Mandatory Fairground Date In Every Wattpad Book
36 | Everyone Knows Carnival Games Are Rigged
37 | Baby You're A Haunted House
38 | No Space For You on My Beanbag
39 | That Questionable Christmas Cake From Earlier
40 | Snow Monster
41 | Secret Recipe Hot Chocolate
42 | This is why you should never preheat the oven
43 | A Big, Huge, Giant Hat
44 | A big ball of cake rolling across the floor
45 | Bon-Bons and (Not) Baking
46 | Christmas at the Cafe
47 | Gingerbread House
48 | Practice is Overrated
49 | A Festive Surprise
50 | Caramel Candycane Christmas Candle β„’
51 | A Controversial Christmas Present
52 | In The Moonlight
Authors Note
Quiz | Which Character Am I?

4 | A Bit-too-sweet Cake and the Future of the Galaxy

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Galing kay itsmeimthevampire

Everett had decided on a Caramel Banana Upside-Down Bread. I know, it was a mouthful to say.

And we had yet to get into any of the actual instructions.

"Wait, this is riveting," he said. "This lady took her kids to the lake and they were the only ones there! Really strange, I wonder whether this will turn into a paranormal horror story."

I shrugged. "Or they were just the only ones there."

"Don't be boring, Clementine." Everett recited the rest of their adventures in the park, the playground, and the shoreline. "Her kid suddenly keels over and falls asleep in the sand. The plot thickens."

I peered over his shoulder, my curiosity getting the better of me even while I realized it would probably be something stupid.

"Now it just goes on a whole spiel about overcoming her peanut butter addiction,' Everett reported.

"Peanut butter?" I asked, mystified.

"Yes," he confirmed, "The cravings are uncontrollable. She hides the jar under her bed and wakes up at 3am to eat it like a gremlin. No spoon involved either, just finger to mouth."

"What does that have to do with the kid sleeping on the beach?"

"It's unrelated, Clementine, that was a different story."

"Oh right, of course." I rolled my eyes.

"Ooh we're getting to the good stuff now; the concept, the creation."

"Okay, what's the concept and creation?"

Everett scrolled a little more. "Okay, so she saw the bananas in the fruit basket and they were upside down, and then the whole concept occurred to her and she was like 'Eureka! A marvellous idea has struck my consciousness,' and then she just made it."

"That's it?" I asked, trying to keep my patience. "That's the whole story that led to this moment?"

"It's not about the destination Clementine, it's about the journey."

"WHAT journey?!" I practically yelled.

Everett glared at me balefully and I took a deep breath to calm myself. I needed patience if I was to spend any more time with this weirdo.

"Let's just start, okay? What ingredients do we need?" I asked.

Everett immediately smiled and the world lit up again. Damn it, it was almost enough to forget what a weirdo he was. Almost.

"We start by smushing the bananas!" he yelled, pulling a bunch of bananas out of a fruit basket and throwing it down on the counter.

"Don't just throw bananas like that, it goes bad."

"The recipe said to smush it," he insisted.

"They said to mash it, not smash it. It's different," I snapped. "You have to remove the skin and put it in a bowl and do it with a fork."

"I wasn't going to use my hand so, what do you think of me?"

I secretly had thought that he would use his fist. I mean, knowing him, it was completely plausible.

Nevertheless, Everett got out a bowl and dropped several peeled bananas in. He mashed it unnecessarily violently with the fork, glaring at me the whole time.

As if he were imagining the bananas were me.

I greased a pan lightly while he arranged the rest of the ingredients on the counter. "We need to spread half a cup of brown sugar around this."

"This packet has about half left." Everett carelessly moved to dump an open pack of sugar in the pan.

"We have to measure it!" I exclaimed as I moved to stop him. "You can't just make guesses, dude, the recipe exists for a reason."

"Sometimes, Clementine, in life, we must take chances. And sometimes, Clementine, cakes may end up with a bit extra sugar in them—it's true. But ask yourself the big questions, does a bit-too-sweet cake really destroy the future of our galaxy?"

"No it just destroys the cake, you weirdo, leave your philosophies and measure the damn sugar."

At least my irritation with him was helping me ignore the lyricism in which he said my name. The way his mouth moved to form the syllables would have been hypnotizing if not for the other garbage that always accompanied it.

"Okay, okay," he conceded, getting a measuring cup. "Let's put some nuts in it too, I have walnuts and pecans."

He dropped them in whole before I could chop them. This bread is going to fall apart the moment we pick it up from the tray. Before I could say anything about it, however, Everett was already tossing a large lump of butter into the pan.

"We have to cut the butter into squares and place it around evenly," I said aghast.

"It's all gonna melt together in the oven, dude."

"But it should melt evenly—why do I even try." I sighed. "Nevermind."

"You shouldn't worry so much about everything," Everett advised me.

"So everyone keeps telling me."

Jenna had always said I acted too serious. And she's right, I do have some trouble with cutting loose and chilling out. I seem to feel anxious over no particular thing.

Everett looked like he wanted to say something more but he held back, biting his lip and glancing away. I found it distracting to watch his overbite digging into plush lips. They were turning rather pink.

"It'll be fine, Clementine," he finally said. "I'm sure things will turn out okay."

"The...cake, you mean?" I asked, wondering whether he was reading my thoughts.

"Uh...yeah, the cake too."

Too.

Perhaps he was more perceptive than I had given him credit for.

A/n: hey y'all! If you like DC fanfics and Tomb-raider, you might enjoy this Wonder Woman x Lara Croft fantasy novella by pixelmum

Lara Croft, archaeologist and brazen tomb-raider, unearths her latest, greatest discovery: a golden apple capable of giving its bearer anything they desire. Except that everyone else seeks the apple's power, from corrupt tech companies to supernatural beings. To complicate things, the golden apple has inexplicably transported a furious Diana, queen of the Amazons, from the Olympian Realm into Lara's world. And she is beautiful when furious.

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