Although we have our differences, we are very similar, you and I.
When you smile, I smile. When you cry, I cry. And when I hide, so do you. We are in sync, perfectly aligned. Like we're made for each other. Soulmates, maybe.
Would it be too much of a cliche to say that fate aligned our paths? And if so, would it be even worse to say that fate tore us apart?
But it wasn't fate, was it? We are like intersecting lines, meeting once and never again. Destined to move through life knowing the sweet, hot touch of another but also knowing that bitter coldness is all that awaits. We can't stop, can't falter. We must move on. I must move on. From you.
But how could I?
How could I forget your eyes, your smile, your cold hands against my burning skin, your soft lips pressing into mine? How could I forget your melodic, bubbly laughs, your quiet gasps deep into the night, my name perfect on your tongue, your name the only one I know?
How could I ever forget you?
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It's been a while since Jungkook's left campus. He looks at himself in the mirror pensively, wondering silently what one usually wears when going to their absolutely stunning kind-of-friends house to paint them. It's hot, so probably a T-shirt. But which one? They overflow Jungkook's closet and it's very overwhelming. Black would absorb a lot of heat so maybe white? But that's so plain and Jungkook wants to look good. He's already wearing his black cargo pants, the ones that are perfectly fitting and baggy at the same time; they hug around his waist and accentuate the harsh jut of his hips whilst also falling over his long legs gracefully and modestly, leaving shape and form to the imagination. But what to wear on top? Perhaps a jacket? But again, the sun does not treat him very kindly this time of year. Jungkook groans in frustration. Who knew this would be so stressful? He feels like a teenaged girl sorting through her closet frantically, convinced she has nothing to wear for her first date. But this is not a date. Jungkook doesn't know whether to be happy or sad about that. He forces himself to stay neutral.
He hears a knock on the front door and then the muffled sounds of Jimin and Taehyung greeting each other. Patience wearing dangerously thin, Jungkook decides to stop overthinking everything and goes with his gut instinct. He'll be painting, so a plain, inexpensive black T-shirt will do fine. He is not going on a date. He takes a deep breath to steel himself before throwing on some black shoes and shoving his faded hair under an also black bucket hat. Something fancy Jungkook does allow himself to wear are his silver earrings with little arrows at the end of them. They're adorable and Jungkook's been in love with them ever since he brought them a couple of months ago.
Backpack full of art supplies adorned, Jungkook inhales harshly as he turns to face the enormous canvas propped up on his desk. "Alright." He mutters under his breath, rubbing his hands together in preparation. "C'mere, big boy." The canvas isn't heavy, not by any means, but holding it proves to be quite the challenge. The rectangular shape is jarring and uncomfortable but Jungkook shoves the canvas under his right arm to hold it in place and uses his left one to keep it stable. He'll manage. He has to walk sideways to get through the door frame.
In the living room, Jimin and Taehyung are waiting for him on the couch. Jimin is still wearing his pajamas, blonde locks a sleep-ridden mess on his head. He's obviously in no state to leave the dorm. He's so enthralled by the movie playing on the TV that he doesn't even bother to acknowledge his roommate's existence. Taehyung however, is wearing something much more appropriate. A simple white shirt under a thin grey cardigan, paired with blue jeans and white trainers. Jungkook almost sighs a breath of relief, so Taehyung dressed casually, as well. His hair is bouncy but neat, framing his face perfectly. "Um, hey there.." The brunette says with a nervous lilt to his tone. "Hi...Ready to head out?" He asks, gesturing to the front door with his head as both his arms are preoccupied. "Yeah... we can walk there since my house isn't far away. Also, I don't even know if that canvas will fit through the bus or train doors.."
"Yeah.. Walking definitely seems like the smarter option."
-
Walking turns out not to be the smarter option. Jungkook should've seen it coming, it's summer; it's hot; he's sweating his face off. But they're here, so there isn't much to complain about. Taehyung's house looks very generic from the outside but once the elder unlocks the front door, Jungkook gets hit with a whiff of cinnamon and it's so strong it almost knocks him off his feet. Wait. No. It's not the smell that takes him so off guard... It's the memories that come with them. Memories long suppressed by his mind suddenly bubble up to the blurry surface. It's not very clear but Jungkook remembers two faces. Both of them kind but sad. Like they know something he doesn't. Like they're just out of his reach. Like they're flying up above and he's on the road beneath them, sprinting to catch up. Like no matter how fast he runs or loud he shouts they won't turn around and he's forced to stare at their backs as they leave.
"You coming in?" Taehyung's voice snaps him back to reality and Jungkook quickly blinks away the moisture that's gathered at his waterline. "...yeah, sorry." Stepping inside, Jungkook follows Taehyung's lead and toes off his shoes, leaving them neatly beside the others. "You can put the canvas there." He points to a plain white wall with several picture frames hung up on it. Jungkook walks up and leans the large canvas against it. Then he looks up and is face to face with the largest frame there is. It's of Taehyung and, the blue-haired man assumes, his family. But it must've been taken years ago because he looks significantly younger sandwiched between his (still guessing) mum and dad. His siblings plank his parents and they're all squished together in a big, loving hug. Warmth and happiness practically ooze from the photograph and Jungkook feels a small smile creep onto his face. And then he gets hit with a painful pang of jealousy that he quickly squashes under his shoe.
"I'm gonna go and greet my mum." Taehyung announces. Jungkook turns away from the picture and, in turn, his conflicting emotions to smile at the elder. "I can wait here." He reassures. Taehyung regards him quietly.
"Actually, she likes meeting new people. Do you wanna come with?"
"Uh... Sure."
And then he spins on his heel and speed walks down the hallway. Jungkook follows behind him. The hallway leads to a set of stairs on the left but keeps going on the right. At the very end of the hallway on the right side is a dark wooden door. Jungkook stops beside Taehyung, his socks slippery against the hardwood tiles, more used to the carpet of his dorm. "She might be asleep, wait out here for a second." So Jungkook does. The door he stands in front of is not a regular, plain one like the others around the house. This door has patterns engraved deep into the wood, giving it an enchanting feeling. Like the door is more valuable than it probably actually is. Cinnamon still lingers in the air, like a candle that's just been blown out. But an older, dustier smell takes precedence - Jungkook finds it oddly calming, at least this scent doesn't make him want to bawl. (What was that about, anyway?)
Suddenly the door is opened again with a creak Taehyung pops his head out, a small smile teasing the edge of his mouth. "You can come in now." The smile blossoms, but only halfway. The elder opens the door wider to make room for Jungkook to step Inside. With the door shut behind him, the first thing Jungkook notices is the complete absence of the cinnamon smell. The second thing he notices is how utterly red and warm the room is. The floor beneath him is covered in a thick red rug but hardwood can still be felt underneath it. There's an unmade but neat queen-sized bed against the wall and opposite that is an old-fashioned TV playing an English show on the lowest volume. In front of that, on a chair filled with blankets and pillows, sits Taehyung's mother. Jungkooks heart suddenly jumps to his throat.
"Mum, this is Jungkook. He's the guy who's helping me with my project." Taehyung gestures over to Jungkook. Taehyung's mum looks over at the blue-haired man and nods her head in greeting. Jungkook, realizing he was just standing awkwardly at the entrance, quickly walks in front of the older woman and bows respectfully. "It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Kim." He says, leaning forward for a handshake. "Nice to meet you, too, Jungkook-sshi. I'm afraid it's just Miss Kim but you can call me by my name, Yejin." She reciprocates the shake with frail hands. She's gentle. The sharpness of her face lost to the wrinkles of time. Her head is covered by a maroon piece of fabric but it's obvious no hair remains underneath. She smiles softly, solemnly, and Jungkook can see the visible lines where many smiles have resigned before. "Nice to meet you, Yejin-sshi.." Jungkook corrects.
Taehyung leans down to leave a kiss on Yeijin's cheek. "We're gonna go now. Auntie called earlier and said she's going to pick you up at five for your appointment."
"Thank you, dear. I'll be ready then. Now you boys run off, I'm sure you've got a lot to do."
"Love you, mum."
And then he's walking out the room with Jungkook following behind him like a lost puppy. When the door shuts with a click and they are back in the faintly cinnamon-scented hallway, the air grows heavy. There's a question at the tip of the youngers tongue and the elder can feel it. He stops walking. So Jungkook stares at his back, mentally debating whether asking the question swimming in his mind is appropriate or not. He doesn't need to ask. "Brain cancer." Taehyung spits, almost as if the words are a poisonous liquid that he's accidentally ingested and the taste is so repulsive that he wants them out as soon as possible. "Oh... I'm sorry." Is all Jungkook can muster. Taehyung turns to look at him, the smile he wears doesn't reach his eyes. "Don't be sorry. She's strong. She'll survive, I know it." Jungkook nods his head slowly. "Alright."
-
"Angle your hips more."
"I don't think it's humanly possible to bend this way..."
"...More to the left.... More—No—More to the right... Not that much!"
"I don't know what you want from me!"
"Like this.... Do it like this... Like this!"
"That's—That's exactly what I'm doing!"
"No, it's not!"
"Yes, it is!!"
Jungkook groans loudly and Taehyung wants to punch him in the face. They're both currently sitting on the floor and Jungkook has been creating quick pose studies to add to the development section of his project. He had whipped out A3 canvas boards along with tubes of acrylic paints in the primary colours and they've been cycling between three different paintings so that they had time to dry. The first two poses were simple enough- sitting elegantly on the couch and leaning against the doorframe casually- but the third one is where the two men are butting heads the most; Taehyung splayed out on the floor looking deeply into the 'eyes' of the viewers. Jungkook insists that he's doing it all wrong but Taehyung literally cannot see any other way to meet the blue-haired man's demands. Whatever he does just doesn't seem to be good enough. The brunette had briefly wondered the morning after making the initial agreement if working with Jungkook would be a horrible mistake: 'what if he's insufferable?' But he had quickly dismissed those thoughts when they clicked so well during their first session in the youngers dorm. Now, he recalls upon those thoughts and wishes they would materialize out of thin air just so he could shove them in Jungkook's face and maybe even down his throat to get him to stop talking.
"Do it yourself, then." Jungkook looks up at him quizzingly. "Do what?" Taehyung sighs. "Put me in the position you want yourself." The elder wonders, when the youngers face flushes pink, if there was a better way to phrase that. "I mean... I don't wanna hurt you." He says. "I'm not made of glass, y'know? I don't get what you mean so just...come over here and pose me already!" So Jungkook leaves his small canvas and even smaller paintbrush on the glass table to his left and hesitantly stalks his way toward the elder. When he kneels beside him Taehyung immediately feels how warm he is. 'He smells really nice...' His brain adds unhelpfully. Like fresh shower gel and just a hint of citrus, it's subtle but delicious. All of a sudden, the brunette's thoughts are power washed away when Jungkooks hands meet his hips. He pulls them to the left and if Taehyung wasn't internally panicking right now then he would have said something about his hips already being like that before. But he can't speak or think or even breath for that matter.
Jungkook's hands glide down to his thighs and he parts them slightly-Taehyung thinks he's about to pass away as he holds back a devastating gasp-and places them back down artistically. He goes on making small adjustments here and there and at some point, Taehyung can't help the shiver that runs down his spine. "..Still." Jungkook whispers authoritatively under his breath but still loud enough for the other to hear, that definitely makes his face all hot. And then he's at Taehyung's head. Their faces are dangerously close and the elder is only getting redder. Jungkook doesn't seem to notice as he runs his hands through Taehyung's fluffy hair, placing each strand separately to ensure perfection. And then the final thing he does is stare at Taehyung in contemplation before quickly swiping his thumb against his bottom lip to lightly smudge the clear lip gloss he had thrown on beforehand. It's so swift that it has Taehyung reeling in shock. But Jungkook's already gone to sit back at his place opposite him. It's cold without him but the brunette enjoys the fact that he's regained the ability to breath again. Space between them is definitely a good thing however Taehyung can't help but feel a bit disappointed at it.
"Um.." His voice cracks, he quickly clears his throat. "So... What's your favourite movie...?" It's a painfully boring question but Taehyung hopes that changing the topic will get his face back to its normal colour. He tries his best to stay exactly as Jungkook's placed him but it proves to be quite the challenge. (He was right, humans don't bend that way.) "Um.. I don't know, I don't really watch movies." Jungkook's hands are unaffected by his words, he works effortlessly, his eyes flicking between his canvas and muse like the harsh breeze against a roaring fire, blowing glowing sparks in Taehyung's direction. "What!?" He pretends to be more shocked than he actually is, his face still resembling a tomato. "Well, tell me you've at least watched 'One day', it's my favourite and a classic!" Jungkook only smiles abashedly.
"Ha.. Nope... I did say that I don't watch movies."
"Well, after we finish with this we are totally watching it!"
Jungkook doesn't say anything to respond, Taehyung takes that as his acceptance.
-
Jungkook walks back into the living room after washing his paint-stained palette, brushes, and hands in the bathroom sink. The paintings are laid out to fully dry on the glass table and Taehyung beckons to him from the couch. "Come sit! You're totally gonna love this!" Jungkook takes a seat beside him and finds that the couch is unfairly soft, he practically sinks right into it. He realizes when it's a little too late that he's accidentally sat very close to Taehyung, they're shoulder to shoulder, thigh to thigh, but the elder doesn't make any moves to distance themselves so neither does he. Jungkook then remembers how Taehyung and Jimin are also cuddling together and wonders if perhaps physical touch is Taehyung's love language. (Make no mistake, it's definitely Jimin's.) The movie plays on screen but neither men are really focused on it.
Because of this, Taehyung falls asleep halfway through. And because of that, so does Jungkook.
When he awakes the first thing Taehyung registers is that Jungkook's head is resting on his shoulder and that he's very much leaning into the other. It's comfortable and he doesn't really mind the warmth and closeness. He can feel the gusts of hot air the younger is consistently releasing as he breaths in and out and it's very comforting. The second thing he registers are three pairs of eyes looking at him suspiciously from the doorway. Ah... His siblings have arrived home. He almost jumps up off the couch to explain that he and Jungkook are not dating because he knows his siblings and knows that's what they'd automatically assume but that would involve moving and waking Jungkook up and that's not really something he wants.
Haewon is pulling the elastic band down from her ponytail so that her locks can flow freely onto her shoulders. She doesn't say anything before giving Taehyung and pointed look and walking off. Chanyeol seems a bit more hostile with his squinted eyes and furrowed brows but also doesn't say anything. He hikes his backpack higher up on his shoulders and stomps away. Nari, however, stares at Taehyung and Jungkook with big eyes. Well, more Jungkook than Taehyung. The brunette wonders what she must be thinking as she's only eight years old and probably has the most innocent interpretation of what's going on. When she does move it's not away like the others. It's toward them and Taehyung's eyes widen in horror, what is she about to do?
Shake Jungkook awake, apparently. "Nari, what are y-" Taehyung begins to scold but she cuts him off when the blue-haired man opens his sleepy eyes in confusion. "Hey!" She calls, getting his full attention. "What the-" Jungkook asks, probably confused as to why a determined little girl was standing in front of him right now. He looks over at Taehyung before sitting up fully. That's exactly what the brunette didn't want, for him to move away.
"Are you dating my brother?"
"Nari!"
"What? I'm just asking!"
".. U-uhm... No, we're not dating...?"
"Good. You're very pretty. Date me instead."
"Nari!!! Get out!!"
"B-"
"He's not interested in dating an eight-year-old! now get out!"
Once Taehyung successfully shoos Nari away he slowly walks back to Jungkook who's still sitting on the couch with a completely red face. "I'm so sorry about her...that was so rude of her, I'm sorry, I'll make sure it doesn't happen again." Taehyung whispers for no particular reason. "It's fine.. She's.. Charming..." Jungkook laughs despite his embarrassment and Taehyung can't help but smile as well. "But you're right, I have absolutely no interest in dating an eight-year-old. Is she your only sibling?" Taehyung sits back down by Jungkook. "No... I have two more and they also saw us together... They probably think that we are dating. But don't worry, I'll clear the air with them." Jungkook nods. "That's... Yeah..." He doesn't finish his sentence, as he's not really sure how.
"Well... It's pretty late, you should probably be heading home now. I could walk you to the nearest bus stop?"
"That would be great, thanks."
They smile warmly at each other. They both also feel warm and bubbly inside.
Jungkook welcomes the feelings with open arms, not used to any of this before. He is nervous, sure, but he's also excited to move forward.
Taehyung does not want to move forward, too scared to accept what his heartbeat tells him. He's only seen one account of this before. And it did not end well.
They both do not want to mess this up.
❈❈❈
Published: 08/03/23
Word count: 3460