Valerie
It's Friday afternoon. I'm in a living room full of people. There is laughter and crying. My smile is not really present and I try hard to hold back my tears. I'm not very good at saying goodbye. Especially not when it comes to one of my best friends, Sofia. I've known Sofia since I moved down the street eight years ago. We clicked from the start. She really means everything to me. We are always there for each other when needed, but that is about to change now. Sofia has found the love of her life. Of course that was not possible here in the Netherlands. No, apparently I attract friends who seek their happiness abroad. Of course I am very happy for Sofia and Brent is also a really sweet and nice man. I just wish I didn't have to put Sofia on a plane to Canada later.
I just ran out of the living room. It became a bit too much for me and I need a moment of silence around me. I walk into the kitchen and there I see someone sitting on the counter. "Isn't it Melissa?". she looks at me surprised. "Um yes. How do you know my name? And if I'm not mistaken you are Valerie". I nod with a small smile on my face. " Totally correct. Sofia has sometimes mentioned your name when she talks about Emma". Emma is Sofia's sister and Melissa is Emma's best friend. "Do you have a problem if I sit down for a while?" She shakes her head and moves a little to make room for me. "Enough of all people?". I sigh and sit next to her on the counter. "Yes, but it was just a bit too much for me". She nods in understanding. " You know you can still see and talk to her every day, right? I understand that it is different, but she does not suddenly disappear from your life". She tries to say it to cheer me up, but the way she says it makes it seem like there's more to it. A pain she really doesn't want to show. "The time difference will make it difficult. I've experienced it once before. My best friend left for Egypt. We would always keep in touch. Well that took a month or two. Never heard from her again after that. But I do assume that Sofia and I will keep in touch as normal. Have you ever experienced something like this?" She shrugs. "I never said goodbye". Again I feel a pain behind that statement, but I don't think she wants to talk about it.
"Shouldn't you be in the living room?" I'll just change the subject. She shakes her head with a small smile. "Sofia doesn't want me there. I'm only there for Emma when she needs me". I look at her questioningly. "Sofia and I don't really like each other." "Why not?". She shrugs. "Sometimes people just don't like each other and that's a good thing. Imagine if you could get along with everyone, then you had people around you all day long. I should not think about it". she says laughing. I can laugh about that too. "Not everyone's friend, then?". She shakes her head. "I have Emma and that is more than enough. You already have your hands full with that one and slurp all your energy out of your body". She says it with a laugh, but I'm kind of touched that she says she only has Emma. "Yes, I heard that". Melissa smiles and looks at Emma, who has entered the kitchen. " I do not know what you're talking about. I was just telling Valerie how happy I am with you". Emma walks towards us and stands between Melissa's legs. " Yes, because after a day with me you can sleep well, because you have no energy left. But I'm happy with you too." she says with a smile. Melissa wraps her arms around Emma and kisses her on the head. " And I with you. How are you?". Emma shrugs. "It's hard, but I'll get through it. I'm glad you're there for me." I see Melissa grab Emma a little tighter. "It's the least I can do. You are the only one who is always there for me." And again I feel that pain.
I think their friendship is nice to see. Emma is fifteen and Melissa is around the same age, but I don't know exactly. Their friendship is really very close. I think many people should take an example from it. I've also had good friendships and in the past, but never as close as what I see with those two. "But what are you doing here and not in the living room?". Melissa shrugs. "You know your sister isn't waiting for me and I keep Valerie talking". Emma looks up at Melissa in surprise, before breaking free from her arms. She then sits down across from us on the kitchen table. "What, you and voluntarily keep someone talking?". Melissa sighs. "Is there something wrong with that?". Emma shakes her head with a smile. " No not at all. Val, what did you give her?" I look questioningly at Emma. "Mel here never talks to people, so you must have given her something or promised something". I can laugh about it. I also like that comment. So it means that Melissa doesn't actually talk to people like that, but she seems to be talking to me without any problems. Judging by Melissa's face, she didn't really like that Emma said that." Then maybe I'm not human. I don't know what I am, but I'm glad she was able to take my mind off things for a while". Melissa looks at me with a small smile. You're welcome!". "So here you are. I was looking for you everywhere. It's time to go". Sighing, I lower myself from the counter and walk over to Sofia. I give her a big hug. "I'm going to miss you so damn much." She hugs me tightly too. "Me too, but we'll keep in touch. We really have to go now or I will miss my flight". I look at her with a small smile. "Then I will stay a little longer, so that you miss your flight". She shakes her head with a smile. I'll let her go anyway. Unfortunately, it is really time to take her to the airport.
Mrs. Morrison is behind the wheel and Sofia is sitting next to her. I'm in the backseat with Emma and Melissa. The two in the front are busy talking to each other and the two next to me too. That gives me some time to think. A lot will change from Monday. I'll start as a biology teacher, which I'm really looking forward to. But it also means that I won't be with my daughter Rose all day long. I also don't have Sofia around anymore where I can go when it all gets too much for me. Fortunately, I become colleagues with Anne. She was a good friend when we did the education together. We kind of lost track of each other after that, but we saw each other again a few weeks ago and it was like we'd never been apart. She also starts for the first time on Monday, so it feels a bit like I don't have to do it alone. Another advantage is that my mother will be my boss. That makes it all a little less exciting. Especially because I start in the middle of the school year, which makes it all a bit more exciting. But the loss of Sofia will not be any less. She is usually always the first person I go to when I need someone. I look sideways when I feel Melissa's hand on my knee and she rubs it gently with her thumb. She gives me a small smile and then resumes her conversation with Emma. It's a small gesture, but it means a lot to me. I wipe my tears and look outside again. Unfortunately, I already see the airport coming into view.
As soon as we got out, Sofia pulls me away from the rest by my arm. "What do you want with that Melissa?". she asks irritated. I look at her in surprise. " Nothing. I met her in the kitchen. She said some encouraging things to me. How so?". She sighs. "I don't like people like her." I look at her questioningly. " How do you mean?". She shakes her head. "Never mind, that will come another time. I really have to go now". She looks at me sadly and gives me a big hug. "Group hug". I call and Emma comes right over. Melissa stands against the car with her hands in her pockets, watching. " Val, you now have the responsibility to look after my sister. Don't disappoint me Mrs van Buren". Sofia says as soon as we let go of each other. " What?". I can laugh at Emma's face. "Oh you didn't know that yet? I'm coming to teach at your school." Emma shakes her head and then looks at Melissa. "Did you know?". Melissa looks questioningly at Emma. "That Valerie is Mrs van Buren?". Emma says, pointing at me. Melissa shakes her head . She doesn't seem to care much. Which I am glad about. Because I don't want things to get weird at school, because I know those two outside too. Okay, I don't know Melissa very well, but I think I'm going to see her more outside of school now. Since she is with Emma most of the time. I promised Sofia that I would visit Emma regularly to see how she is doing. Sofia and Emma no longer have any other family besides each other. Their parents died when they were young. Especially Emma was very young. Since then they have been living with Mr. and Mrs. Morrison. Together with a number of other children, all from different families. They've never had a bad time there, but it's never felt like a family with either of them. Which Emma always has a harder time with than Sofia. Especially after Sofia went to live on her own. Emma has never really had a very good relationship with anyone in the house. So Sofia has asked me to take care of Emma a bit and of course I said I will. Emma feels a bit like my little sister. Especially in the beginning, when I just met Sofia, Emma was always there when we went to do something, because she is a lot younger and didn't really go anywhere alone yet. That has changed somewhat in recent years and she is almost always with Melissa, but that does not mean that that feeling as a little sister has become less.
With a lot of pain and effort we left Sofia at the airport. Saying goodbye was really hard. The four of us are now having something to eat somewhere. Mrs. Morrison is sitting next to me and Melissa and Emma are sitting opposite us. Not much is said. Everyone is a little bit in their own mind. It does give me the opportunity to take a closer look at Melissa as unobtrusively as possible. She looks a lot more tired than when I saw her a while back. I can also see that she is dealing with something, but I don't think I'm the one who can do anything about it. She suddenly looks up and catches me staring at her. She gives me a small smile and then looks away. I get a message from my mother asking if I can come home like this, because she has to leave. Which in itself I am happy with. This silence doesn't do me much good either.
Mrs. Morrison has already gone inside. I'm still outside Emma's house, with her and Melissa. "Do you have anything to do today?". Emma shakes her head at me. "Would you like to come to my house? I don't feel like sitting alone." Emma looks questioningly at Melissa, who only shrugs once. " Oke. We don't have anything better to do anyway. Is Sander not at home?". I shake my head at Emma. Meanwhile we walk a few houses further. Sander and I got married when I was eighteen and that was eight years ago now. Together we have a two-year-old daughter, Rose. "He is abroad every weekend for his work". I say as I let them into my house. "Hey girls. How nice to see you here". I can laugh at Emma and Melissa's faces as soon as they see my mother. "Hi Miss Smith". Melissa says with a friendly smile. The four of us talk for a while and then it's really time for my mother to go. I think it's nice to see how much respect they have for my mother and therefore the principal of their school. "would you like to watch a movie?". Both girls nod. I show them the way to the living room. I grab some drinks and snacks from the kitchen and then join them.
Emma plopped down on the chair. I sit on the couch with Melissa. " I'll be right back". Just as I sit down I hear Rose upstairs. I get her out of her bed, give her a change of diaper and then take her downstairs. "Can I hold her for a second?" Melissa asks with shining eyes. "I don't know if she wants to." I put Rose down on her own feet. I can't help but put a smile on my face when she walks straight to Melissa. Melissa helps her on the couch, on which Rose climbs onto her lap. "I'll make her a bottle of warm milk . Otherwise I won't get her to bed tonight. You can give it to her if you want." Melissa nods enthusiastically.
I quickly make a bottle for Rose. I'm surprised I don't hear her at that time. Normally she keep talking, in her way. I walk back to the living room. I get a little warm inside when I see Melissa sitting with Rose. They are having a whole cuddle session. I see that Rose's eyes are getting heavier again. "I don't know if she needs it now. I believe that your hug is also helping to get her back to sleep". I say when I hand Melissa the bottle. "I rather think it's because she saw Emma". she says with a smile. "Oh you're lucky that Rose is with you". Melissa sticks her tongue out at Emma. I love seeing that interaction between the two. "I understand what you mean. Just looking at her how busy she is sometimes makes me tired". When I say that to Melissa as seriously as possible with a smile, a pillow flies to my head. " What is this? You have had one conversation and immediately you conspire against me". I look at Melissa with a smile. "I think someone is jealous." Melissa nods with a smile on her face. " It looks like that. Then we should let her choose the film, then she will be happy again". We continue to talk about it for a while until Rose has fallen asleep again on Melissa's lap. I then take her back to her bed and then it's really time to watch a movie.
Emma had first picked out a horror movie, but I went against that. It ended up being a hallmark Christmas movie. I'm glad the holidays are just over, but it's always one of those feel-good movies. That's something I can use right now. What secretly also feels good is Melissa's head lying against my shoulder. She fell asleep pretty soon after the movie started and now she's slumped over against me. I try to move as calmly as possible and put an arm around her, so that she may be a little more comfortable. " Oh sorry". Apparently I wasn't careful enough. I give Melissa a small smile. I can hold my arm just tight enough around her so she doesn't move away from me. "I don't mind playing as a pillow. We can also lie down. That might be a bit more comfortable." I say softly. Melissa gives me a somewhat uncertain nod. I lie on my back and Melissa comes to lie with me. She lies on her side next to me and rests her head on my shoulder. " Is this OK?". I give her a small nod and put an arm around her. Then we watch the movie again. I must admit that I do enjoy this. It's been a long time since I've laid with someone like this and I'm actually a pretty cuddly person.
Melissa quickly fell asleep again. " What?". I ask Emma softly, when I see her shaking her head with a smile. "Witch". she says with a smile. " How so? What have I done now?" "We already agreed this afternoon that you weren't human. And now I'm convinced you're a witch. Mel sometimes gives me a hug with difficulty, but look at how she lies with you". Meanwhile, Melissa has firmly put an arm around me, which will only make it feel better. "I can't help it that you sucked all her energy out of her body". Smiling, Emma shakes her head. "What's the matter with her?" Emma looks at me questioningly. " How do you mean?". I sigh. "It's probably none of my business, but I noticed that Melissa looked a lot more tired than when I last saw her. I don't really know how to explain it either, but when I look at her I can just feel a pain inside." Emma seems a bit surprised when I say that. "Mel is indeed dealing with some things at the moment, but it's not my place to comment on that." I nod understandingly. " Yes sorry. You are absolutely right. It's none of my business." It falls silent again and we continue watching the film.
"Val?". I hear Emma say ten minutes later. " Yes?". She keeps looking at me for a moment. "How did you mean that you could feel the pain inside?". I give her a small smile. " Like I said, I don't really know how to explain it. It's like I could feel her pain. I don't think most people would notice, but I can just feel and see from Melissa that something is bothering her . Why doesn't your sister like her?" Emma sighs and looks a bit annoyed. "Because she likes women". My eyes widen. " What?". I put my hand over my mouth because it came out pretty hard. I don't want to wake Melissa. "Are you serious now?". Emma nods uncertainly. "You don't hate Mel now, do you?" I shake my head hard. " Of course not. I just never expected this from Sofia. Let's not go on about it now. That's not going to improve my mood." Emma nods in understanding. We watch the film in silence. I just don't get much of it anymore. I'm boiling with rage inside. I never expected this from Sophie. If I had known this before, I don't think I could have been friends with her.
The movie is over and I really need to go to the toilet. I twist out from under Melissa as gently as I can. Fortunately, she stays asleep this time. I put a pillow under her head and then quickly do the essentials. When I come back into the living room I sit with Emma on the armrest of the chair. "I'm off in a minute." She says softly and looks a little unsure at me. "Could Mel sleep on your couch?" I nod. " Of course. That's no problem. Do her parents agree with that?". Emma starts to look even harder. "Um yes. I'll pass it on to them." I keep looking at her for a moment. " Are you sure?". She nods. " Yes it's no problem. Thank you for letting her sleep here." I give her a smile. " Your welcome. She's already sleeping so well, so we can't waking her up. I'll grab a blanket from above and put it over her. Then I will follow her example." Emma stands up. I follow her to the front door. " Call me if there is anything or if you just want to speak to someone. My door is only a few houses away and is always open for you. I promised your sister that I would always be there for you and I'm really going to keep that promise. Not only because of that promise, but also because I just want to make sure that you are doing well". Emma gives me a hug after I say that. " Thanks Val. The same applies the other way around. Good night and send that sleepy head my way tomorrow". I nod with a smile. " Okay I will do that. Sleep well".
When Emma has left I pick up a blanket upstairs and then carefully put it over Melissa. "Sleep well Melissa". I say softly and give her a kiss on her forehead as gently as possible. Then it's time to find my own bed. So that I can get some sleep in advance until Rose wakes up again.