CHAPTER LIV
❝ You don't deserve to be selfish. ❞
Lucy tried to keep her breathing normal as she scrambled through her clothes in her cupboard, her hands searching for a single piece of parchment that she'd hidden there months ago.
She rubbed her eyes harshly to un-blur them as she finally pulled the parchment out and unfolded it.
Lucia, I'm not writing to you to ask about your lifestyle and how your life is going on.
I'm writing to you to talk about something important and something that can't be allowed to reach anyone's ears. Talking over the phone was dangerous. This letter is spelled shut and its real contents can be only visible to you.
I believe that Casper has sent you a collection of my spell books. They aren't meant for your time pass. They have to be used to bring your father back to life. I've worked over them my whole life.
I'm quite sure that you haven't opened them even once, so let me enlighten you about its contents. They contain the only few possible ways to bring a person back to life. We've long ago discussed one of them, a very promising one I must say, but as it turns out you've been reluctant. I know you still are. But think bigger, Lucia. It is the only way to bring Steve back to life.
A loved one for a loved one. This is the only way. I have only loved two people in my life, Steve and you. Steve is no longer with us. And you, my daughter, will not be the one to be sacrificed. It's you who'll have to do it. You've loved many people. You still love many. Pick up any one of them whom you love as equally as Steve. Use that vampire friend of yours. Or much better use your daughter. Your parent child bond will be the perfect replacement for the bond you shared with Steve.
And even if you'd fail, we have a long list of your loved ones, don't we?
I wish you'd reconsider. Once Steve will be back we'll be once again a happy family. I'm even ready to forget all that you'd done in the past.
Just think. And possibly act fast.
Richard Wright.
Lucy crumpled the paper, angry tears running down her face as she screamed silently at her helplessness.
She'd asked everyone to leave her alone for some time, promising that she won't do anything stupid to harm herself, and this was what she'd decided to do in that time.
Cry at her helplessness.
She threw a vase down from the adjoining table, the glass shattering on impact.
Lucy screamed in anguish, a broken sob raking her body as she threw away the table, internally thankful for the silencing spell on her room.
"Why dad? Why?!" she screamed, breaking herself with a sob as she collapsed onto the floor. "Why again?"
"Why do you have to ruin my life every damn time?! Why can't you see me happy? Why? WHY?!" she banged her head in the cupboard, wrapping her arms around her knees. "First you kill Kerem, now Brie? Why dad, why do you do it every time? I thought you'd never hurt a child! How could you stoop down so low? How? How could you kill such a small child? Didn't you feel any remorse while doing so? What the hell about your oath of never hurting a child?!"
"And what the fuck do you mean 'even if you'd fail, we have a long list of your loved ones'?" she asked to the thin air. "Now you would kill everyone I love?! Why don't you just sacrifice yourself if you love Steve so much?!!"
"No, no," she wiped harshly at her cheeks, "I won't let you harm anyone else. I won't. I'll hide. I'll put so many cloaking spells that you will never find us!"
"But, but," she whispered, deflating, "you find me every time. You break through each spell I do. Fuck. I hate you so much! I hate you!"
"And I will not let you harm anyone else. I won't let you sacrifice Nik." she said with determination.
"I won't. Even if..." she began to cry again. "...even if I will have to stay away from him. I won't let you sacrifice him too. I won't."
"I'm sorry, Nik. I'm so sorry." Lucy coaxed out along with a broken sob. "I'm sorry for everything."
Lucy scrambled up, wiping her tears, as she ruffled through pages in the bedside table's drawer, bringing out a parchment and pen and beginning to write.
Dear Nik,
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry but I'll have to do this. I have to stop being so selfish and risking your life.
My father is a monster. He will do anything to hurt me under the name of bringing Steve back. He sacrificed Brie on that so-called altar of his. But I won't let him sacrifice you too.
Maybe you'd laugh reading this letter and say 'I'm the Original. I can't be killed.', but Richard is a witch. He could make anything possible. Hell, he might even grow white oak from dark magic even if it meant giving in return something big.
And trust me when I say this, he was thrilled to see that you mean something to me. An Original for sacrifice would be his best treat.
I know that you might hate me after this, hell, I know you will hate me for this. But, please try to understand, I can't be so selfish to risk your life because I love you so much, Nik.
And I hate it that you'll have to know of all this through this letter. But I know I would never be able to do this if I look you into the eye. God, how much I wish I could hug you, hold you, kiss you one last time, but I know that if I'll look into those eyes of yours, I'll grow weak and I will grow selfish. But I can't do that, for you, for I love you so much that I would rather spend an eternity away from you than risk your life.
I hope you'll forgive me for this one day.
Love is a sin for me, I've understood now. Everyone I touch will be ruined and snatched away from me. So, I'll live the rest of my life with your memories, but please don't wait for me. Enjoy your life, maybe find someone wonderful too. But please forgive me someday.
I love you.
Always and forever.
Lucy.
Lucy made no efforts to subside herself as she taped the tear stained paper on the cupboard, right in the view of anyone who would enter the room, and began tossing some clothes, money, cards, a few family pictures, Brie's favourite car and a Henley of Nik into a gym bag.
She drew some deep breaths, washing her face with cold water as she tied her hair up, willing herself to become conscious enough to drive.
No more feeling tied to Mystic Falls and its people. It's time to leave and abandon everyone. For their own good.
Lucy stared at herself in the mirror, her eyes bloodshot, dark circles evident, tear marks.
"Fuck it all." she said in a steely whisper. "You gotta go. Leave everyone behind because you're just not worth them all. Let them live, stop being so fucking selfish. They all deserve to live and not be sacrificed on some stupid fucking altar by some madman. Nik deserves to live. Stefan deserves to live. Vaishali deserves to live. Bonnie deserves to live. Kol deserves to live. Tyler deserves to live. All of them. You don't deserve to be selfish."
She gripped the marble top, inhaling deeply, "Just leave."
But, the most difficult task would be to get out of here unnoticed.
Lucy took her bag, stuffing all her phones in it, and tip-toed to her room's door, peeking out as her eyes fell on the triad anxiously discussing something on her living room couch.
Her eyelids fluttered close once, willing herself to fill with determination, and she snapped her fingers, focusing hard, the crease on her forehead ceasing as the three vampires' necks snapped and they fell backwards on the couch with a low thud.
She allowed herself to look at Nik one last time. Looking so peaceful with his eyes closed, painfully unaware of her crazy decision.
Then she let her eyes flit to her best friend, Stefan, whom she had no idea when she would see again. Probably never.
And finally to the other Mikaelson, the white oak stake in his coat pocket still visible to her as Kol's unconscious form practically half hanged from the couch.
God, it hurts how much she is gonna miss them all.
She quickly averts her eyes. Now is not the time to fall weak.
Lucy exits the room swiftly, softly closing the door behind her, as she hears some voices nearby.
"She's in her room, Care. Tell Tyler it'll take time but she'll be soon fine- Oh, Lucy?"
Fuck. It's Bonnie.
Lucy internally screams at her luck and forgetfulness as Bonnie's whispering fades away abruptly and Lucy realises that she has actually been spotted.
Of course they'll all be here. All her friends. Because they are worried about her. Because her daughter died just yesterday-
God, she needs to stop.
"Hey." Lucy forced a smile onto her face as she turns around, her face almost falling when she realises that Bonnie's not alone.
There's Vaishali and Jamie too.
"How are you feeling now, Lucy?" Bonnie asked softly, walking on eggshells around her.
"I am fi-"
"-wait." V interrupted, holding up a stern hand as her eyes flitted to the bag in Lucy's hand. "What's that bag for? Are you going somewhere?"
"I just needed some air." Lucy gulped.
She can't even snap their necks. She'll just have to put them all to sleep.
"With a bag?" Vaishali's eyes narrowed.
Lucy should know that V will be the first one to catch up to her lie.
"I just wanted to buy some things too."
"Like?"
"Just things, V." Lucy said, annoyed.
"I'll come with you."
No way. "Why-?"
She stopped herself mid-sentence.
Jeez, it'll be easier to put just V to sleep and vanish.
"Okay." she nodded.
"Okay, then." V said, quirking a brow, looking obviously unconvinced by her answer but nevertheless ready to follow her out.
"Where are others?" Jamie asked.
"They were in the living room." Vaishali said.
"The living room is empty." Lucy said calmly, "Nik's getting our bags ready. We're leaving for Florida. And that's for what I'm going to grab stuff for."
"You are leaving already?" Bonnie asked, her tone crestfallen.
"Yes. It's not like anything is left in this fucking cursed town anymore." Lucy snapped, her knuckles curling. "And can we go already, V? I'm getting late."
"Yeah, of course." Vaishali nodded, following her to the garage.
"I'm driving, obviously." Lucy said, disposing of her bag in the backseat of her white car.
"We're going to the supermarket?" Vaishali questioned.
"Just have a seat, V. I don't have forever."
V frowned, but nevertheless I obliged.
"Remember the first time we met?" Vaishali asked softly as Lucy occupied her seat.
"Yeah." she nodded, sighing before she looked up at V's face and frowned. "V? There's a cut on your forehead."
"What?" she frowned, touching her forehead. "There's no blood though."
"It's a scratch. It's not bleeding but it looks like there might be infection." Lucy explained. "Here, let me heal it."
She hovered her hands on Vaishali's forehead, closing her eyes as she muttered an incarnation under her breath and soon Vaishali's eyes were dropping close and she was fast asleep.
"Sorry, V. There was no cut, but I just needed you to fall asleep." Lucy sighed, exiting the car to carry out Vaishali's asleep form and levitate it to a spare sofa in the garage.
Finally, there was no one to stop her and make her rethink her decision.
She stepped on the gas and headed in the opposite direction of Mystic Falls.
◇◇◆◇◆◇◇
Lucy might have left everything behind, but within a few hours of speeding away from Mystic Falls, it dawned onto her that she had no destination.
She might have gaslighted herself to leave without falling weak, but the effect of that gaslighting was slowly fading away.
'Daddy's gonna buy you a Mockingbird.
I'ma give you the world.
I'ma buy a diamond ring for you, I'ma sing for you.
I'll do anything for you to see you smile.'
Lucy groaned in annoyance yet again as the car in front of her at the petrol pump blared with this song, its windows rolled down as the obnoxious teenage boys sang along with it.
"Can you hurry up?!" a man from the truck behind her shouted, honking loudly.
"God, these people." she sighed in annoyance to herself as the honking from behind her and the music in front of her stopped abruptly, courtesy of her magic.
She honked loudly, ignoring the 'ah, shit's and 'oh, no's from the car of teenagers.
"These people are so damn slow." she muttered to herself, reclining back in her seat. "I should have taken the jet instead."
Finally after another five minutes, it was her turn.
"Ma'am, please get out of the car."
She obliged and naturally, checked her phones in the meantime.
Nik | 32 missed calls
Stefan | 20 missed calls
Vaishali | 29 missed calls
Bonnie | 18 missed calls
Kol | 16 missed calls
Jamie | 7 missed calls
Nik || 20 unread messages
Bonnie || 5 unread messages
Stefan || 27 unread messages
Vaishali || 10 unread messages
Kol || 7 unread messages
God, what a mess.
And despite the best of herself she opened Nik's messages.
Nik ━ Where are you???
Are you okay??
Fuck, are you kidnapped?
Lucy, don't tell me you did something stupid.
Lucy, answer me, I am freaking out.
Everyone's freaking out here.
She stopped reading at this point, taking deep breaths to calm herself and not cry in front of everyone else.
"You're done, Ma'am."
She nodded thankfully at him, and finishing the payment, speeded out of there.
tw : suicidal attempt
She had left everyone behind. She had abandoned everyone. She has no one left.
And the hell is she supposed to do now?
She has understood that friendship, attachment, love, everything is a sin for her. She can't freakin care about someone without risking their life.
'Even if you'd fail, we have a long list of your loved ones.'
She inhaled deeply, gripping the wheel so hard that her knuckles turned white.
"Just let it go." she whispered to herself, the tears falling again.
There is nothing left for her anymore. Her life is pointless now. So what's the point of her living?
She can't be with Nik. Her daughter is dead. Her father has proven yet again that he is a monster. She can't have any friends without risking their lives. And she can't even revenge her own daughter. What was left for her? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
Lucy stepped on the gas, releasing her iron-grip on the wheel and closed her eyes bracing for the impact.
She will miss everyone forever. One. Brie. Two. Nik. Three. Stefan. Fou-
Her phone blared loudly, snapping her out of it, as she slammed into the breaks, the car skidding dangerously and coming to a halt on the lone highway.
Lucy massaged her bumped forehead, bending down to pick up her phone which had fallen.
Casper.
The name flashed across her screen with a dangerous warning deep within.
She hesitated, unsure of how much Casper knew of her current situation and finally decided to not pick up.
The ringing stopped before she could reject the call, and the next second her phone was pinging with messages that she could see were quite an essay.
Casper ━ I know I haven't been a good friend ever since I came to Mystic Falls. But you must understand it is complicated.
One side is my father who has done nothing wrong, and the other side is you who hold my father guilty for something he'd never done. I wish to never choose between any of these sides.
And I know we've grown rather far since the last few decades but I'm still quite sorry for what I'm doing to do and I would have already done by the time you would be reading these messages.
Your father is growing desperate to bring Uncle Steve back. You know this, he never stopped trying.
You must understand that this time his method is failproof. It's decades of his hard work. And even if you don't trust him, trust me when I say this, it is perfect. The whole spellbook, what we call 'The Key', is failproof.
I know Brie means a lot to you, of course she will, she is your daughter. But obviously not more than Steve uncle, right?
This is a once in lifetime opportunity, Lucy, and unfortunately, even if you don't seem to understand this, I understand its vitality.
Uncle Richard has chosen me to undergo the sacrifice. It's a blessing I won't reject.
I hope you can find it in yourself to forgive me one day.
And trust me you'll forget all about Brie once you see Steve Uncle back to life.
- C.D.
Lucy was gripping her phone so hard, that her knuckles had turned white.
"Casper." she seethed out, her breathing heavy with anger, "NO! You fucking backstabber! NO! NO! NO! You fucking killed my daughter. YOU are her murderer! I'll fucking find you and I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!"
END OF PART I
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A/n :
Well, you guys can officially hate me now.😭😭
But don't hate me too much, cause next chapter we'll be in TO S1 and soon Lucy and Nik will meet again (obviously).
I love you all, muah<33
Until then,
Ripahhhhhhhhhh.
Word Count : 2948