Okay, firstly, I'm so so so sorry I took so long to post. Seriously, I feel horrible about that. I hadn't even realized how long it had been. Secondly, I'm sorry this chapter sucks. I've been suffering through writer's block for the past few weeks and this is what came out of it. It's pretty slow and boring, kind of a filler. But the part that comes next I wanted to do well, and I knew I needed a better mindset for it it come out how I wanted it to, so I put it off for a chapter, and this is what resulted. So even though I think this is a bad chapter, I still hope that you guys all like it. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy this.
And I promise to try updating earlier this time!
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Chapter 15
I had to hide my jitters during dinner. I didn’t want to act normal and controlled. I wanted to think freely of that afternoon, of the windswept emotion that rushed through me when I thought of David.
We kissed. Kissed. I kissed a werewolf—and could still feel fire coiling in me, the energy of desire. I wanted to replay the feeling of it in my mind, the warmth, the novelty. I could feel my skin begin to flush anew and forced myself to concentrate on other things.
Like how the snow peas on my plate were much neglected next to my pasta shells. Or the story my mother was sharing about the neighbors. Or the way my father was glancing at me every so often, as if he knew what I was trying not to think about. Or how my little sister Marissa was wearing a bug-eyed expression as she watched her own hands glow as she created light between her fingers.
Any of this I should have been thinking about.
My mother finished her story and I laughed weakly with my father and Topher, pretending like I had been listening to the whole thing and hoping she wouldn’t notice. She didn’t, too busy laughing at her own story.
“Marissa, stop it,” my mother hissed, finally noticing what my sister was up to.
Marissa pouted and dropped her hands into her lap. “When I can I learn how to make it light leave my hands, mommy?” She inquired, her wide eyes turned towards my mom and her curled hair tumbling over her forehead.
I saw my mother’s eyes flash over to me before she smiled down at Marissa. “Maybe if you’re good, Leila will show you.”
I tensed at this, realizing I had been involuntarily brought into the discussion. “What? Why me?”
Marissa made a high pitched squeal sound and looked at me, excitement blooming on her face. “Sissy!”
I frowned at my mom. “You know physical magic isn’t my focus, mom.”
She waved her hand in reply, unconcerned. “It’s small, Leila. Just show her how to send light sparks from her fingers.”
I sighed before smiling at Marissa. “I’ll show you, okay? After dinner.”
She smiled widely and clapped her hands three times, making them glow on the last one.
It was adorable, and I wished I were as enthusiastic as she was about the lesson. But I didn’t want to show my sister magic. I didn’t want to show anyone anything. I really just wanted time alone with my thoughts.
But then, in my family, it was never about what I wanted.
I showed Marissa how to send light sparks from her fingertips. The light looked like little fireworks falling in the air. They were harmless, though a little hot it if one fell on open skin. The little light sparks were nothing but excited electrons in the air.
Marissa, much to her disappointment, was only able to send blocks of light from her hands, and the blocks only last a few seconds away from her skin. After trying and continuously failing for half an hour she gave up. She went off to play with some toys in the other room, leaving me free to retire to my room.
“You’ll be a good teacher,” Topher told me on my way up the stairs. I ignored him, and continued as if the wind had swept his voice away into nonexistence.
I could hear him following after me. I slammed my bedroom door behind me, blocking him out. I smiled as I imagined his facial expression. Topher was the all-important-feeling type who hated being shut out and ignored like that. Doing so brought a certain satisfaction. Unfortunately this satisfaction was short lived.
I collapsed on my bed, throwing my arm over my face as I did so and sighing dramatically. I felt my body relax the tension of the day away. In the security of my room, where I had fortified the walls, I could let my mind relax and open. I was protected here, just as much as I was a prisoner.
My thoughts wandered to David. His smiling face, warm hands. Our kiss. I could feel my skin heat, still, at the thought. I smiled and bit my lip.
I had never felt this way about anyone before. I always assumed my parents would set me up with a witch, as was usual with witches. But I was nineteen now, and they still had not mentioned it. Witches were usually paired off by now. I knew my father had always been opposed to the idea of matchings, and I wondered if he had been able to convince my mother to let me chose my own husband. It seemed unlikely, but maybe my mother really was concerned with my own happiness.
I remembered the feel of David’s hand in mine. His skin was smooth and rough at the same time, powerful yet tender. I wanted to hold his hand again. And again. And yet still after that.
I shook my head. What was I thinking? It didn’t matter that I hadn’t been paired with a witch. It would still never work with David. We would be executed before my family supported such union.
Anyway, I didn’t even know if I could tolerate being with a Shifter. Sure, David made me feel funny inside, like I was bursting with energy and yet calmed at the same time, but what if that was only because he was a Shifter, and I had never interacted with one as much as I had David? What if I was misreading my own emotions?
I sighed again. This was all so confusing.
But I wanted to see David, right then. Surely that meant something? I wanted to hold him, and kiss him, and feel his warmth mingle with my energy. I wanted it to be just a girl and a guy when I was with him; none of the witch and Shifter business. I wanted to dress prettily for him. I wanted him to compliment me. I wanted….
I didn’t even know. But I wanted to see him.
I gasped in remembrance and sprang up, smiling. I was a witch, I could see him right then if I wanted. Without even having to leave my room, or have anyone know what I was doing. He wouldn’t be able to see me, but at least I could see what he was doing—what he did in his spare time.
I got off my bed and walked over to my closet. Pulling out a shallow white bowl, I blew the dust off it. It had been a while since I had done anything of this sort. Next I walked over to my desk and poured some water from my water bottle into the bowl. Then I climbed back on my bed, and set the bowl down on my Indian-style crossed legs.
Muttering, I concentrated on the spell and David’s face. After a minute, the water rippled and smoothed to show David.
My breath caught. He was laughing wildly, happiness etched across his face. I could see he was sitting on the ground outside a house, judging by the light. He wore nothing but a grey T-shirt and jeans. He threw a clump of dirt at someone off the picture.
I muttered something and the picture zoomed out, revealing Aaron to be the other person. He had a fresh clump of dirt splattered on his shirt. He said something, and David laughed harder in response.
Aaron said something else. I wished I knew what they were saying, but I had not yet mastered how to incorporate other senses when scrying like this. I would have to be content with just watching.
David stopped laughing at whatever Aaron said. He looked serious for a moment, before he flung himself at Aaron, yelling. The two crashed to the ground, wrestling. They were yelling at each other and throwing punches. I could feel my pulse rise, worried about the fight. What could they be fighting about? What would happen to David for attacking the Second in Line of the pack? That was no light charge. What would push David to do something so stupid, especially when he had just been laughing?
Aaron pinned David to the ground, looking smug. David grabbed a clump of dirt and threw it at Aaron. Aaron let up his grip and they started fighting again, rolling around throwing punches and elbows. I noticed I was gripping the bowl too tightly, but didn’t loosen my fingers.
Aaron pinned David to the ground and bit his shoulder lightly. They were both breathing heavily. David rolled his eyes lightly and mumbled something. Aaron rolled off him, smiling. David said something else, and Aaron laughed a reply. David began laughing too.
I stared at the image, thoroughly confused. They just fought. Aaron didn’t seem mad at David, although David attacked him. It was almost like they were wrestling for fun. But that couldn’t be. Could it? Who wrestled for fun?
David leaned over and punched Aaron’s shoulder. Aaron turned and said something. David replied and began laughing. Aaron rolled his eyes but smiled.
I didn’t understand. They were having fun? Was that a Shifter thing? Fighting for fun? Even in their human forms?
Both men were lying down, staring at the sky. They were quiet for a bit, and I took the time to study them. They were both calm, and looked to be in pleasant moods. I wasn’t sure, since I couldn’t sense their moods like I normally could, but neither was tense. Rather, they were both relaxed and comfortable.
David had his arms under his head, resting his head on his hands. It exposed his biceps, which I found myself very interested in. His chest was rising in slow breaths. His eyes were closed.
Aaron said something. David’s eyes opened and he replied after a few minutes. It didn’t seem like they playful conversation from before. They looked serious as they spoke back and forth. They talked for a while, laughed occasionally, looking relaxed the whole time.
I don’t know what I was looking for. I don’t know if I found anything. But it was nice to see David, even if he didn’t know I was watching. Even if I couldn’t hear him, or say anything to him.
After a while I began to get a headach. That happened if I tried to maintain a spell for too long. I ignored it at first, but it persisted. With a last look at David, I mumbled a few words and the image rippled out until I was staring down at blank water. I put the bowl on the ground.
Sighing I laid down, closing my eyes. I pictured David lying on the ground, hands under his head as he looked up at the sky. Except instead of Aaron lying next to him, I pictured myself there. And instead of staring at the sky, we were facing each other.
I knew it was pointless to picture this. It would never happen. But for the moment, that didn’t matter.