Needle In the Hay
chapter ix
warnings: drugs, locker room talk
HER ROOM WAS DARK WHEN she woke up, but Layne didn't know if she should accredit that to her black out curtains that block sunlight or the fact that she had slept nearly the whole day. She wanted to feel better about the fact that Rafe had promised to get better and that her parents knew about their relationship, and she didn't have to sneak around anymore, but there was still an unbearable weight on her that felt like someone was pushing her into the ocean with bricks tied to her ankles.
Layne sat up and pulled pulled her blanket all the way up to her neck, leaving it to rest on her shoulders. There was a cold breeze that drifted up the back of her shirt and she pushed her hair out of her face before tugging her phone off the cord. Rafe had sent her a picture of him at the gym, his hair wet, sweat glistening off his chest and stomach. Layne caught herself biting her lip and zoomed into his face until it was pixelated and she was unable to decipher his features. She hated how attractive he was. He had sent it a few hours prior and Layne realized she had slept half the day away. She hearted the picture and closed her phone, throwing it on the duvet and rubbed the sleep out of her eyes.
Her phone buzzed and Layne immediately picked it up, seeing a text from Rafe. For a moment she didn't want to open it, but he had never responded so quickly, it was hard to get used to. In fact, Layne couldn't think of a time that he had double texted her. Toying with her phone a bit, she finally opened it, and she felt like nothing really changed.
Wyd?
She frowned, although she wasn't really sure why. It felt like the beginning of their relationship, when he would text her that just so he could pick her up and fuck her in the back of his dad's car. Layne never would've thought that Rafe could destroy her life the way he has. She should've assumed that she would grow so attached to the boy who took her virginity—but Layne walked through life thinking she had a different stride than every other girl. She was wrong. Layne was so similar to everyone else it pained her.
just woke up lol
She deleted what she wrote and stared at the blinking cursor. He was her boyfriend now. At least, he said he was, she said he was, she told her parents he was, and everyone thought he was. He had promised to get better.
nothing
She sent it without thinking. Rafe probably thought she was annoyed. She laid down and stared at her phone and the typing bubble that kept showing up and disappearing. After a minute, her phone buzzed with a text.
You alone?
Layne narrowed her eyes, anxiously biting on her nail. She knew where this was leading and felt an indescribable amount of guilt swimming in her stomach. Layne felt gross and she shifted in the mess of sheets and clothes in her bed.
yeah just in my room
Rafe replied almost immediately and Layne felt herself starting to blush.
Can you send me a pic of you
Layne bit her lip and covered her face as if anyone was in the room with her. Turning over, she juggled on what to say. It wasn't like she hadn't sent him pictures before—he always asked for them. She had to put them in a separate folder on her phone so no one would see them. Rafe would send pictures back without her even asking, and Layne would delete them instantly because she hated seeing them.
i'm tired
There was always a sense of guilt that consumed Layne like a fire after she did anything remotely promiscuous. But she knew Rafe was good at convincing and would make her feel like the worst person on planet earth if she didn't do this one thing for him. Like getting him off was the only thing she was good for.
Cmon baby please I'm so horny
Layne turned over again and pulled her blanket over her head. She chewed on her nail a bit more, typing something and then deleting it before taking the cover off her head. Layne got up and locked her bedroom door, even though she wasn't sure if her parents were even home. Her hands were shaking as she stripped down to her underwear and laid back down on the bed.
Layne did pride herself on being able to take good naked pictures of herself. Marian and Claudia taught her the proper angles and how to pose to make her look more seductive than she actually was. She readjusted her hair and took a few before zooming in on every part of herself. She was too skinny it made her cry, and she sent them before she could cry even more. Layne threw her phone face down on the bed before putting her clothes back on and rubbing her face. Her phone buzzed and she hesitantly turned it on.
Your so hot
He used the wrong you're and it annoyed her. She didn't say anything back until he sent a picture of himself in the shower. Layne looked at it and screwed up her face in disgust. She still saved it to her phone and tried to change the subject. The consistent texting was throwing her off and she didn't want to get too used to it.
since when do you want to text me so much
She didn't feel proud of that one. If anything, it was a bitch move—she knew that. But part of her wanted to see how he responded.
Since ur my girlfriend
Her heart skipped a beat and she didn't answer him. It felt bittersweet having him say that—almost as though she was so programmed to keep their relationship a secret, that when he said it, even in a text, she wanted to delete it and block his number. She felt safer within their entanglement instead of being official. She knew Rafe would have more control over her now than ever.
She put his shirt back on, sniffing the collar. It still smelled like his cologne and laundry detergent. Layne wondered if he did his own laundry and thought it was comical imagining Rafe doing typical household, domestic things. It was almost like he was untouchable and not real. He wasn't normal and didn't do normal things.
Her legs were cold walking out into the kitchen, where her mom was sitting on the couch with a glass of wine and a cigarette in the other hand. Rory was asleep, the wine nearly spilling out of the glass, and Layne crept over to put out the cigarette and tried to take the glass out of her mom's hand. She couldn't remember the last time her mother smoked—let alone smoked in the house. She had been clean for over a year now. Layne assumed it was her own fault for her mother's relapse—giving her heart attacks every night since she came back from college. Rory didn't know how to protect Layne anymore, because she couldn't. She couldn't be the superhero mother that she was trying to be, because those didn't exist. Layne had to learn for herself and from her own experiences. Rafe was poisoning her daughter, but she couldn't do anything about it.
Rory perked awake when Layne tried to take her wine glass away, jerking awake as though someone had poured cold water down her back. Layne nearly jumped out of her skin too, backing away slightly and sitting on the arm rest of the couch. "Sorry." She muttered, holding her hands up in surrender. Rory readjusted herself on the chair and rubbed her eyes, putting the wine glass on the nightstand.
"Hey baby. Did you sleep OK? I didn't wanna wake you." Rory cooed, moving forward to run her hand over Layne's cheek. Layne nodded slowly, a wave of guilt coming up her throat like vomit. She remembered sobbing into her mother's arms not that long before and she had just sent Rafe nude photos of herself. Rory was probably so disappointed in her. She caught Rory's eyes drifting down to her neck and Layne impulsively pulled some hair over the marks. They were still pretty prominent, and despite telling everyone it was from surfing, it was irrational. She felt weak in letting Rafe touch her like that—but he promised he wasn't going to anymore. He was trying to get clean, and get better.
"Yeah—I didn't realize how much I slept." Layne cleared her throat, anxiously tugging at the loose string on her shirt. Rory cleared her throat, taking a long sip of her wine before resting her glass down on the side table. Layne watched the condensation from the humidity outside melting the ice and dripping down the glass. Layne craved a glass of wine but felt like she needed to keep herself away from substances before she continued to make irrational decisions.
"Do you have any plans tonight?" Rory asked, trying to cover up the ashtray as if Layne hadn't already seen it. Layne felt guilty for wanting a cigarette for herself. She also felt embarrassed because she didn't have any plans tonight. "I dunno." Layne wanted to rot in her bed and send more photos to Rafe. She wanted to sneak out to the marsh and let him touch her wherever he wanted. She wanted to be available to him whenever he wanted her to be.
"OK. Just remember what we talked about." Rory took a final sip of her wine before getting up to go to the fridge. Layne nodded wordlessly and moved to head back towards her room. Her legs were cold and she had to stuff them underneath her blankets. She picked up her phone and saw no notifications—she didn't know why she expected people to be texting her first. That never happened.
Layne opened up Rafe's text messages and stared at the Since ur my girlfriend text. She pressed on it and released it a few times, hovering her thumbs over the keyboard.
What are you up to?
She ogled at the text for a while, getting nervous when he didn't respond right away. Layne tried not to be obsessive, but he made it so difficult. He probably overdosed on his bathroom floor.
Rafe was laying half naked on Kelce's couch, sweat beading his forehead and his heart racing. He had bumped about half the bag that Barry spared for him and was trying to fiend off the debilitating heart beat that was inching closer and closer to cardiac arrest. He tried to breathe deeply through his nose, but the music was playing so loud and Kelce and Topper's stupid friends were being so loud Rafe thought he could kill all of them without blinking.
He thought about Layne. She would know how to calm him down—she had done it before. Her hands would rest on his arms and face and he would look her in the eye. Her voice was soothing and she would get him glasses of water and tiny crackers. She would take a cold shower with him despite being completely sober and shivering afterwards. She loved him, and these assholes he was with were too busy impressing each other and seeing who could bench more. He sat up, reaching for his phone which was on the coffee table. There was cocaine residue dusted over the screen, and Rafe swiped it off with his finger and rubbed it on his gums.
Kelce and two other boys with whom he couldn't remember their names sat down next to him on the couch and the chairs around it. Rafe saw the text from Layne, biting down hard on his lip and itching his neck. He didn't want to tell her that he was doing cocaine at Kelce's house and lying about getting clean. He didn't even want his friends to know that Layne had his number.
"Who's that?" Kelce laughed, leaning to read over his shoulder. Rafe turned his phone away and pushed Kelce by the shoulder. Kelce smirked and leaned back in his seat. "You're her bitch now, huh?" He joked, but Rafe thought he could push him out the stupid window that was taking up the whole wall behind the couch. The pool glowed a bright blue underneath the moon and obsidian sky. He liked knowing he could get Layne on her knees just by looking at her, and he liked knowing that his friends knew that. He hated thinking that his friends thought she had the same control over him that he had over her. Rafe liked knowing that he could snap his finger and she would be kissing him all over and nursing him back to health.
"Shut up, bro." Rafe scrolled up to the pictures she had sent him earlier. "Check this out." He waved Kelce over, and Topper and his minions followed suit. His heart dropped a bit that they would see Layne naked. It made him want to choke them out on the ground and have her watch. He liked her knowing that he would kill any boy who looked at her the way he did.
The picture of Layne on her bed was bright on his screen, and he had an unfamiliar of guilt while the other boys ogled over her bare chest and underwear. He was an asshole. Rafe knew that. But in some masochistic what he wanted their approval more than treating his girlfriend with respect.
"Jesus fuck, Rafe, not even your sister sends me that shit." Topper remarked, and Rafe punched him in the arm. "Shut the fuck up." Rafe snapped, pulling his phone away from them so he could scroll through their messages, and try to conceal all the times he begged for her forgiveness and told her he loved her. He quickly switched to his camera roll, trying to find a picture saved of her that would be the cherry on top.
He came upon a picture he had taken of her getting dressed without telling her. "The Oscar goes to..." he clicked on the image, biting his lip as he backed the phone up so they could see. The guilt was still resting on his chest like a pile of wet laundry.
"Holy shit." One of the boys he didn't know muttered, placing a hand over his crotch. Rafe thought he might throw up.
"I think we're all gonna run a train on Layne." Kelce laughed, earning a hard punch to the chest from Rafe. "You're so fucking funny, dickhead." Rafe muttered, pulling his phone closer to him and closing it. Kelce had tried to catch a glance at the phone one more time, but Rafe stuffed it in his pocket. He felt an indescribable taste of shame climbing up his throat like bile. Rafe never felt guilty. If anything, sometimes Rafe scared himself with how little he felt.
"I'm serious." Kelce muttered, but Rafe couldn't tell if he actually was or not. His throat went dry. "You wouldn't even know what to do with all of that." He shook his head, tugging on the roots of his hair before running his hand over his face. He was so high he couldn't even focus on what was in front of him, and their was sweat beading on his forehead and dripping down onto his neck.
"How was she last night?" Topper hit him in the arm, and Rafe tried to blink out of his daze. "I mean she must be easy to throw around right?"
Rafe pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed heavily. "Rafe threw her around that night at Marcus's after she was fucking around with that touron. Fucking roughed her up and everything." Kelce joked, but Rafe turned and glared at him, harshly moving to grab the collar of his shirt. "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about." Kelce stared at him, eyes hooded and a small smirk on his face.
"Hey, chill out bro. I don't blame you. I would've done the same seeing her all over that fucking touron." Kelce held his hands up in defense. "I know it's not the right thing to say, man, but...when you grabbed her, after, and pulled her ass off...that was some good shit. I mean you didn't have to go as far as to choke her." he laughed, and Rafe's eyes narrowed before he tightened his grip on Kelce's shirt, practically picking him up and slamming him up against the well behind them.
"Jesus fuck, Rafe." Topper yelled out, as everyone got up from their spots on the couches and chairs. Kelce groaned from the contact his head made with the wall. "Hey, hey, I would've choked the girl too if it were me." he winced, his hands still up in defense. Rafe was seeing red—literally. He felt like all the blood vessels in his eyes had popped and his head was pounding. The high might've been making him sweat, but the anger wasn't helping. He choked Layne because he had to, because he wasn't listening to him. Maybe it was an insane thing to do—but it made her listen.
"My point is I didn't fucking choke her." He seethed, lifting Kelce up a bit before slamming him back against the wall.
"Rafe, chill the fuck out." Topper warned, trying to get Rafe off of Kelce, but Rafe just placed his forearm across Kelce's chest and pushed Topper away with his free arm. Topper stumbled back onto one of the other boys with a grunt.
"Alright bro, chill, don't get so upset you fucking choke me." Kelce joked, but Rafe didn't think it was very funny. He took Kelce by the shirt and threw him onto the ground, and Kelce yelled out in pain. Rafe lunged for him, but Topper was able to hold him back by his arms. "Rafe, back off man. Back off!"
Rafe breathed heavily while staring at Kelce, Topper, and all the other boys around them before looking back to Kelce. "Say that I didn't fucking choke Layne." he pointed his finger at him. Kelce groaned and rubbed the back of his head. "Rafe—"
"No, fucking say it." He pushed Topper away from him. "Tell all of them that I didn't fucking do it." He gestured to the rest of the boys crowding around. It was silent except for the thumping of the music and Rafe's heart in his ears.
"Alright. Alright. You didn't choke Layne." he groaned again, rubbing the back of his head. Rafe breathed heavily through his mouth, and Topper tried to place a hand on his arm, but Rafe pushed him away again. "Bunch of fucking assholes." he muttered to himself, pushing past the others to grab the coke he left on the table and shove it back into his pocket.
He pushed out of Kelce's house and rubbed his face aggressively. The sweat was dripping down his face, and he felt the need to reconcile with Layne. He was too high to drive but did it anyways. His breathing turned erratic and he gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white. He wasn't exactly sure where he was going—he couldn't go home. Maybe he would go by Layne's. Sneak in her window. He had forgotten he had promised not to do that anymore and hit himself in the head multiple times.
Layne lay on her bed and stared at the ceiling, counting the number of times she heard a frog croak outside her window. She was laying in a puddle of her own sweat and trying to quell her headache. Rafe hadn't answered her and she contemplated texting him again, but she couldn't. She promised herself she wouldn't do that anymore—she wouldn't chase him. They had agreed to different things to make their relationship better, if it even could.
On an impulse Layne decided to call Marian. She wasn't sure if she would answer, but she just wanted to see if she could get her friend back. Layne hadn't spoken to her since the night Rafe dropped her off at her house when she was high on fentanyl. The phone rang a few times before going to voicemail. Layne called three more times before Marian answered.
"What?" she spat, and Layne didn't answer for a few moments. She didn't know what to say and sat up on her bed, picking at her nails. "Layne? Hello?"
Layne breathed in, pinching the bridge of her nose. She wasn't really sure what to say and could hear Marian's annoyed sighs from the other line. "Marian—hi. I just uhm...I wanted to talk to you." She cursed herself internally for that answer. Her throat was dry and she coughed a little.
"Uh...OK?" Marian spoke like she was talking to a stranger. Layne felt like a stranger. Maybe she was dreaming.
"Sorry...I just wanted to uh—apologize. I haven't been the best friend lately. My world got really small since I started dating—uh, seeing Rafe." Layne stepped on her own foot particularly hard when she said the word dating. It felt like saying a curse word in front of her parents when she was in middle school. A heat wave ran through her body and she tried to shake it out. There was silence on the other line. Layne didn't actually believe her words when they came out. She wasn't sorry—and she shouldn't have to be. She really didn't do anything wrong. They were bad friends, but it was always her taking the fall.
Marian cleared her throat. "Yeah. You have been a bad friend." Layne felt her chest drop and she breathed heavily out of her nose. Maybe she didn't deserve friends. Maybe Rafe was all she ever deserved. She looked down at her arms and how the bruises were turning green.
"Yeah. I just...I want to make it up to you, and Claudia. You helped me when I wasn't doing too well." Layne didn't know how else to phrase it. She hadn't spoken to Claudia since the day they went out to breakfast and hadn't spoken to Marian since Rafe dropped her at her house and ran. Sometimes she wondered why she chose him over friends. But then again, she didn't have any friends to begin with. Layne thought of the time she spent with Rafe on the beach when they were seventeen. He had told her that he picked her because they both didn't have genuine friends. Neither one of us has many friends he had said. Genuine friends. He was right. Layne didn't have real friends—but she had him. That was enough.
"Marian?" she breathed into the silent phone. she wasn't sure what Marian would say to her—maybe solidify Layne's own thoughts and tell her how bad of a friend she was. Maybe Marian would tell her that there was no way that she could ever forgive her for choosing her psychotic boyfriend over them a thousand times over—and that Layne would do it again and again.
"Yeah—I'm here. Just thinking." Marian breathed. Layne couldn't believe how dramatic she was being and eradicated the idea of calling Claudia afterwards or any of the kids. Layne stayed quiet and waited for her to answer.
"You could uh...You could help with Midsummers in July. We need a bartender." she breathed, like it physically pained her to speak. Layne winced and realized she had to go back to the marina the following day. She spoke without thinking. "Yeah I can do that." her voice cracked lightly and she started to tear up, and she wasn't sure why. Layne sometimes felt like her emotions were too big for her own good. It was like she was made of tears, and it ran through her veins instead of blood.
"I'll see you then. Love you." Marian whispered, like someone was in the room with her. Layne suddenly felt anxious when Marian hug up without another word. She remembered that they all shared each other's location and realized that Marian and Claudia had suddenly turned the location off and her heart pooled at her shoes.
Layne placed her phone face down on her bed and release a long, shaky breath out her mouth. There was a moment where she stared at the ceiling and wondered what it would be like to be the fly on the wall. Layne was pretty sure she was beginning to melt into her bed and her body was creating a permanent indent on the mattress. Her phone began to buzz repeatedly next to her head and Layne groaned thinking it was going to be her mom. Rafe's name lit up on the screen.
Layne let it ring a few times before answering and gingerly putting it up to her ear. "Hello?"
Rafe hardly even let her finish before letting out a shaky, long breath. "Hey." He whispered. It sounded like he was in a car with the windows down. The wind was ruffling against the speaker and it was hard to hear anything he was saying. "Rafe? Where are you?"
He sighed loudly, rubbing his face when he was stuck at a red light. It started to smell of weed and he could tell he was getting closer to the Cut even though his vision was spinning and it was getting harder and harder to drive. "I uh—do you think I could come over?" He was sweating and his hands were starting to slip off the wheel. Layne's head began to pound and she wasn't sure what to say.
"I thought we said you can't do this shit anymore. No more sneaking in." she pinched the bridge of her nose and sat up in her bed. Rafe shook his head frantically as if she was in the car to see him. "No—no I uh. I'll meet your parents."
Layne did not expect him to meet her parents this way. If anything, she expected him to meet her parents at their funeral. Maybe at her own. Or if he got her pregnant. "What?" she spoke exasperated, in disbelief. Layne thought she would have to force him, maybe drug him, in order to get him to walk through the front door of her house with her parents in the living room. His eyes would be dilated, sweat beading on his forehead and down his back, sniffing and itching his nose.
"Please. Just let me come over. I want to see you." he pleaded. He was swerving on the road and Layne heard the car's beeping at him over the phone. "Are you driving high?" she stood up, a hand on her hip while the other gripped her phone until her knuckles turned white. Layne inhaled deeply and closed her eyes, as if to separate herself from what was happening.
"No, I'm not driving high Layne, what the fuck." He lied, getting so defensive Layne flinched even though he wasn't in the room with her. He was always in the room with her, leaning over her shoulder, breathing down her neck. "I just—I had a bad day, I wanna see you, please." He breathed. He was already pulling up to her house.
Layne let out a sigh. "OK. Fine. Just—are you almost here?"
"I uh—I am here."
Layne cursed at herself. "OK—just...come to the front door." Her heart was beating in her ears. Layne had never mentally prepared for when Rafe would meet her parents. Rafe wanted to die that the first time he was meeting his girlfriend's parents he was high out of his mind and only using her as a leeway to not to go home. Ward had told him that the next time he came home high after owing him money he was kicking him out. Rafe couldn't go anywhere but Layne's house.
"Hey baby." Rory greeted from the kitchen, a fishbowl-sized glass of red wine in her one hand while she cooked a stir fry on the stove. "You slept for a while." Her voice was quiet, while Kurt had grabbed only two plates from the cabinet above the toaster. Layne chewed on her lip and felt embarrassed—even sad. She hadn't eaten dinner with her parents since Junior year of high school.
"Yeah...I needed it." she laughed, stuffing her hands in her pockets and rocked gently on her heels. "Where are you off to?" Kurt grunted, moving to sit in his spot at the small table. Layne went and grabbed two more plates from the cabinet. "Nowhere." she placed the two plates next to her parents, and Kurt looked up, eyebrows furrowed.
"Who's the other plate for?" Rory asked, placing her glass down across from Kurt, with the stir fry in the middle of the table. Layne awkwardly stood at the head of the table. "Uh—Rafe. He's here."
There was a chilling silence that washed over the dining room, followed by Rory and Kurt's utensils clanking onto the plates. Rafe stood awkwardly outside the house and tried to peer through the dimly lit windows. "he's...here? Right now?" Rory tilted her head to the side, and Layne nodded, moving to the front door and opening it quickly. Rafe was standing there, rubbing his nose, hat backwards and his shirt half unbuttoned and he was sweating profusely. Layne felt her blood boiling and he tried not to look her in the eyes.
Rory had gotten up from the table, leaving a stressed out Kurt to peek over her daughter's shoulders. Rafe gave Rory a tight-lipped grin and a nod, his hands stuffed in his pockets and playing with the half-opened bag of cocaine and tried to hide it from Layne. "Nice to meet you Mrs. Hetfield. I'm Rafe." Layne watched him with disgust. He was high.
"We've heard a lot about you." Rory had her guard up. Layne could tell by her tone of voice that she was trying, for her, but Layne could see right through her. Rory was a horrible liar. Rafe was too high and too full of himself to notice. "Is that a good thing?" Rafe laughed, looking between Layne and Rory. His eyes lingered too long on Layne and he could feel the tension suffocating them.
"Come in." Rory turned on her heel and walked back into the dining room. Layne placed a hand on Rafe's chest as he tried to walk in. "Are you seriously meeting my parents when you're high as fuck?" Layne whispered, tilting her head. Rafe let out a heavy sigh, rubbing his forehead. "I'm not high, OK? Why do you always think the worst of me?" He spoke like he was about to cry. In fact, Layne saw tears in his eyes and felt a piece of her heart break off. Rafe placed his hands on her arms and stepped through the threshold. He was so much taller than her.
"You can trust me, right?" He breathed, and Layne shook her head, wanting to cry. "No." she looked to her parents, who were trying to listen in on their conversation, while also whispering among themselves. Rafe placed a hand on her cheek and guided her eyes back to him. "Hey, look at me. Trust me, OK?" he placed a kiss on her forehead, and pulled her into his chest for a moment before walking into the dining room.
Sometimes Layne questioned why she was with Rafe for this long. There were other guys that would treat her well. That she wouldn't show up high to her house when they were going to meet her parents. But all those other boys were boring. Rafe was a burning house Layne wanted to live in.
Rafe was so high during dinner that his words were coming out a jumbled mess, as his brain was working faster than his mouth. Layne, several times, had to translate what he was saying or step on his foot under the table. Kurt and Rory did not like him. She could tell.
"Layne, your bruises seem to be clearing up." Rory spoke, but didn't look at her—just kept her eyes on Rafe. Almost like she could tell that it wasn't from a surfing accident and wanted to see Rafe would break. Layne wiped her sweaty palms off on her shorts and nodded her head. "Uh—yeah. They are." She picked at her food. Layne had hardly ate it. Rafe was stiff in his seat and stared at his plate. Kurt took a long sip of his beer and cleared his throat.
"Layne, can I talk to you in the kitchen for a minute?" Kurt asked, nodding his head toward the door. Layne threw around the few pieces of rice in her mouth for a moment before nodding and taking a sip of her water. "Uh—yeah. Sure."
They walked into the kitchen, and Kurt looked behind them as though he was scared Rafe was following or listening. Kurt placed a caring hand on her arm. "What's up?" Layne asked, nonchalant. She knew what was up.
"Layne—the fuck is up with this kid? He on something?" Kurt whispered, shaking his head. Layne sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "What—no, no. He just...he has ADHD." she lied, placing her hands on her hips. She couldn't look him in the eye.
"Layne. I haven't meddled with your romantic life at all—haven't wanted shit to do with it, honestly. But...no guy in the world is ever good enough for my little girl, and I'm telling you now...this Cameron kid, I got a bad feeling about him." he gripped her arm a little harder, and Layne shook her head.
"Dad—listen. I...I've been with him for a long time. I love him. Please." she pleaded. "Please just try to like him."
"I have been—"
"Try harder. For me." She felt bad guilt-tripping him, but she could read her parents like books. Rafe wasn't the type of boy to bring home and meet your parents, and she knew that. Hell, Rafe even knew that too. They heard Rory and Rafe laughing from the other room. Layne quirked up her eyebrows. "See?" She patted Kurt's arm before turning back around and making her way into the dining room. Kurt wavered slightly before following her back.
"What are you two laughing about?" Layne cleared her throat, nestling back down in her seat. Rory shrugged. "Rafe was telling me how you dropped ice cream on his shoe in middle school." Layne's face went red. He left out the part where he knocked the cone out of her hand. They left out all the bad parts when recounting their moments together.
"Are you finished?" Rafe asked, nodding to her plate. Layne wordlessly nodded, even though there was plenty of food left on her plate. It was almost like he was challenging her to stop eating. "Uh—yeah. You want it?" he nodded, reaching for her plate.
"Layne, are you sure you're done eating?" Rory asked, concerned. Rafe was halfway putting her food onto his own plate, and she nodded. "Uh—yeah. Yeah I'm not hungry."
They didn't talk much the rest of dinner. Rafe's high was wearing off and his head started to hurt from the bright lights in the dining room, and kept squinting. Kurt watched him carefully.
Rafe had taken all of their plates and put them in the sink, and helped Kurt clean off the table while Rory and Layne put the dishes in the dishwasher. "I don't want to tell you who to date. But I just want you to think hard and long about it. You've dedicated so much of your teenage years to this boy...I want to make sure you aren't making the wrong decision." she whispered as to not let Rafe hear. Layne felt like she was choking on air.
"Mom, trust me. Please." she felt like Rafe saying that, and by her luck, him and Kurt walked into the kitchen.
"Thank you for dinner Mr. and Mrs. Hetfield."
Layne thought her parents would insist him call them by their first names, but they only smiled and nodded. "Of course. A pleasant surprise." Rory sounded sarcastic and Layne bit her lip anxiously and Rafe chewed on his nail.
"We're gonna go to my room." Layne crossed her arms over chest. She felt sixteen again. "Oh—oh OK." Kurt nodded. "Yeah, perfect." Neither one of her parents seemed to laugh or say OK, but Layne realized she didn't need their permission anymore. She was nearly twenty—she wasn't a little kid anymore. Layne walked ahead of Rafe and purposely nearly closed the door behind her. Rafe pushed it opened and closed it tenderly behind him.
"OK, why are you so mad at me? I thought it went well."
Layne paced back and forth with her hands on her forehead. "Are you kidding? They kept asking me if you were on something—and don't lie to me, I know you're high as fuck. Why do you keep lying to me, Rafe? You said you were going to get better." She sat down on the edge of her bed and started to cry, trying to stifle her tears. Rafe leaned against the wall and let out a few shaky sighs, as he started to tear up too.
"Jesus, Layne...I said I was trying to get better. You have to give me the benefit of the doubt." He used the voice he always did when pleading for her forgiveness. Layne hated how easily she was willing to forgive him. "Hey, baby..." He knelt down in front of her, reaching to hold her arms and pull them away from her face. Layne was stiff and pulled away from him, looking at him with tear-filled eyes.
"Woah, woah...hey, look at me, baby." He placed his hands on her face, on his knees in front of her. I'm ruining you, aren't I? Layne heard his voice rattled in her head. "I love you Layne. I just need help. I need so much help...but you're helping me get better, baby. I need you...you know I'll take care of you, right?"
Layne hesitated, swallowing the lump in her throat. Rafe's thumbs wiped away her tears and he kissed her forehead. "You'll take care of me, too, right?" he used one hand to take his hat off and throw it on the floor. Layne let out a breath and nodded, holding his wrist. He placed a kiss to her lips. She thought he looked pathetic on his knees in front of her, saying how he'd take care of her.
"I want to meet your family." she said after a moment of him petting her like she was a dog and placing kisses all over her face and neck. He grew still and let go of her face. "You already have." he laughed, shaking his head.
"Properly. Meet your sisters...your dad. Your stepmom."
"Rose isn't my stepmom." he laughed, getting up from his knees. Layne sighed. "Yes, she is. Please, Rafe...just this one thing."
"You don't want to meet my dad."
"I do Rafe. That's what happens when you date people—you meet their parents." she pleaded, and Rafe paced around the room, muttering to himself. "My parents don't like you, but at least yours will like me." Layne didn't realize what she said until it came out of her mouth and she regretted it.
Rafe looked at her with dark eyes and stormed up to her, Layne immediately moving up towards the headboard of her bed to get away from him. Rafe realized what he was doing and backed up towards the opposite side of the room. "Shit—Layne, I'm sorry...fine. You can uh...you can meet my family—and Rose. How about tomorrow?"
Layne inhaled, wiping away her tears. "Tomorrow night? Dinner?"
Rafe pinched his eyebrows and nodded. "Sure—sure fine." he sighed, sitting on the edge of her bed. "Come here. I'm sorry." He beckoned her over, and Layne hesitated before moving toward him. He wiped her tears away and placed a long, gentle kiss on her lips. She kissed back before breaking. She didn't want to have sex with him, and he could tell. Rafe opened his arms and let her cuddle up to him, hugging her close and breathing in the scent of her hair. Layne smelled his cologne mixed with his sweat and the beer he had been drinking.
He pet her head and placed kisses on the top of her head. "Let me stay over?" He muttered into her hair. Layne sighed. "Maybe." She joked, laughing slightly. Rafe chuckled too and tickled her sides. "Just maybe?" he continued to tickle her stomach and Layne fell back on her bed laughing. He continued to tickle her relentlessly and she tried to push him away.
"Stop, stop, Rafe!" she laughed, grabbing him by the arms. He hovered over her and placed his hands on both sides of her face. "I love you, Layne." He whispered, pecking her lips. Layne smiled small.
"I love you too."
authors note: yayyyy an update. took me forever to write this lmao but then obx3 came out (which is sooooooooo bad but we don't talk about that bc drew looked SOSOOSOSOSO good. but yeah this story will most likely end after s2!) and i got so much inspo so hi!!!! rafe and layne are kinda happy rn but *spoiler* good things don't last!!!
one more chapter until time jump (kinda) to s1! i'm excited asf!!!